Misery Doesn’t Always Love Company

Mark A. McDonald

Copyright © 2009 by Mark A. McDonald.

Library of Congress Control Number:

2009911245

ISBN:

Hardcover

978-1-4415-9239-2

Softcover

978-1-4415-9238-5

Ebook

978-1-4500-0401-5

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Contents

Life

Change

My Mother’s Chair

Why

Complacency

Thief

For You (Thanks to an employer)

Dance

Free

Red

Love

Jackie

Relief

Consequence

Do You Really?

Just before Dawn

Passion

Siren

Discontent

Yesterday

Hardship

Path

Elián

Drain

Drive

My Sovereignty, a dilemma

The Deciding Factor

Faith

FOE

Indifference

Forever

Traitor

My Shame

Faith

The Rose

Master of My Fate

Anguish

Taint

Truth

Pain

Distress

Within

Race

The Only One

Introspection

Advent

Esteem

Me

CAT

Eventually

The Person I Knew

My Fire

Average

Et Al

Left, Right, Wrong?

How Can You, Mozart?

What Would You Say

Ode

Doubt

Closer

For Jackie & Amy

Life

We constantly wade through the toil and the strife

Where is my lighthouse, my guide

Life compromising!

Life unbecoming!

Life—I find you lacking!

But I digress . . .

“We must make an effort to implement positive changes in our lives

And not just sit and watch the days go by”

Change

Are you willing to, in your life

Facilitate change?

Are you willing to go through possible hardship

To earn its wage?

Or succumb to the crime of indifference

And invite its rage?

“Everyone needs a place where they can go to temporarily

Forget and relax”

My Mother’s Chair

I really enjoy sitting in this chair

It gives me such comfort

It gives me such peace

All chaos around me cease

Nothing gets to me, frustration the least

When I’m sitting in this chair

No matter how angry, malicious or negative I get

I sit back, I forget

I let my mind clear of all its ails

They all just dissipate in the air

All the worries, all the fear

Because of this chair!

Its wonderful color, with dirt and stain

Troubles try to overtake me—they try in vain

If I could only stay a while longer

Only remain

In this chair, my mother’s wonderful chair.

“Something that always has to be taken into consideration:

The Human factor”

(Hear that Marx!)

Why

If on man we could rely

If only on his word, his honor, we could go by

We can’t, why?

It is not that everything done, spoken, implied is a lie

But man is oriented unfortunately, to watching his fellowman fail, even die

One has to be exceptional, not necessarily good but at least better

Or even try

And we can’t, why?

We live in a world in which good people are greeted with suspicion

Suspense

Where is truth when we need it to stand in our defense?

Hypocrites, chameleons, no one to trust, a true offense!

You would think that such an intelligent species would have more sense . . .

Yet we do not, why?

Isn’t it good to know we can be set straight?

Choose other options besides envy, bigotry, hate?

But a lot of us are going to give in too late

Still harboring the same old habits

But wait

If on both sides these forces reign so great

To what or whom, will we finally relate?

We get love, unity, peace

And all we have to do is forsake malice, hate

Yet we can’t, why?

Can you tell me?

“If you have something to do to better yourself

To create a better tomorrow

Do it now!

Don’t procrastinate

At least life is pointing you in a particular direction”

Complacency

So many gone before me

Have been lost along the way

So many, some bad, some better than me

Their lives have dwindled away

Some fell into undesirable company

Some their environment was too rocky

But I seem to have landed on fertile clay!

But I have to grow

I have to flourish

I have to bear fruit

I have to nourish

But first I have to die!

But I’m comfortable with this life

I don’t want it to vanish

Yet it seems I have no choice

It has begun to diminish

I’m holding on too long to this lie

For things to get better

I have to die

But I’m afraid of the unknown

I’ll lie down, I’ll try

But what do I know—I’m just a seed!

Thief

To be a thief wouldn’t that be neat

Steal, steal, easy and neat, sweet?

I don’t think so

Me? I’d never get caught, never

The cops would be too dumb to catch me, catch me? Never, ever?

I don’t think so

Alright, so I got caught

It was those stupid idiots, it wasn’t my fault!

But hey I’m not worried, the judge can’t make nothing stick

If only these stupid cops stop annoying me, especially that pig, that . . . @#&!

I’ve never been sent to prison, and I never will

I’ll get off, you just wait and see

What with my amazing abilities, with my skills?

I don’t think so.

God damn! I’m in prison!

Why didn’t I pay attention to my lawyer, that stupid judge!

Why didn’t I listen?

No! No! I’m not going in there!

YOU CAN’T MAKE ME!

NO! LET ME GO YOU PIG! NO, LET ME GO—ah man—

YOU DIDN’T HAVE TO HIT ME!!

Alright, alright I messed up, please give me another chance

I’ll change my ways

GET YOURSELF TOGETHER BOY!

TAKE YOUR PUNISHMENT LIKE A MAN!

DIDN’T YOU KNOW THAT crime doesn’t pay

Hey look! Fresh meat! Well what do you know—

HELLO BABY!

Guard, was that big guy talking to me . . .

Huh?

Answer me

ANSWER ME!

Maybe

Son, it’s simple, you break the law you pay

Think about it son, we’re doing you a favor

The direction you were going

In a few years you might have been dead anyway!

Oh yeah? I’m going to get all of you!

That’s what you think!

That’s what I know!

With that kind of attitude young man . . .

I don’t think so.

“Happy is the man who is employed in something he enjoys

Wouldn’t it be perfect without these distractions called Bills?”

For You (Thanks to an employer)

No matter the complaints I hear

The sounds of discontent

The glimmers of fear

Whether it’s justified

Whether it’s true

I’m thankful to God

For you.

Without your accomplishments, your dreams

None of us would be here

Yes, employment we would have found

Although we don’t know where

But to get a chance at a better life

Something better, worthwhile to do

I’m thankful to God

For you.

Sure we could have been better

Or we could have been worse

Will time pass judgment

By the size of one’s purse?

If only we could just be concerned

With the here and now

Do our best, help each other out

And be thankful for what tomorrow allows

One day, we might see some of our dreams come true

But until then, I’m thankful to God

For you

One’s true path in life is sometimes clear

Most of us are oblivious to it, don’t even care

I’m thankful you found yours, despite pain or strife

I’m thankful that you and your company are a part of my life.

“The lust of the eyes

The lust of the body

The pride of life . . .”

Dance

Dance for me

Dance some more

Turn me on

Capture me in your stare

Torture me, I don’t care

Just don’t say you’re gone

Show me what I want to see

Come deep, deep inside me

Deep and long

I’m yours, at least for a while

To you I belong

How ironic

Or is it pathetic?

I think I’ll go home now

Later.

“One of the strongest human desires is freedom.

But what do you do if the shackles are invisible?”

Free

When shall we be free

Truly free?

Do we act

Stand proud and

Take the initiative, or

Just wait and see?

Black person?

Human?

“Distract me

For just a little while longer”

Red

Red and white

What a sight

Too bad it’s just a fantasy

Moving to the left then

To the right

Room barely void of light

Harkening the conveyor of ecstasy

Stares falling on empty eyes

The beautiful smile

The beautiful lies

I love you.

Love

The “Holy Grail” of relationships,

Be it myth or true

To find that someone who makes you feel so wonderful inside

When they say “I love you” . . .

“Tend your garden with all the care and love you can give

Give each flower the greatest chance of being all it can be”

Jackie

Beautiful flower

On this long lost day

Your frail, wondrous petals

Have started to fade away

Although the splendor of your bloom isn’t visible now

Fantastic flower, your demise I shan’t allow!

I know now what I must do

The care, the love that must be given to you

You only get one chance to show the world your light

In this endless night

So bloom, beautiful flower bloom with all your might!!

Do not succumb to winter’s merciless cold

Let only tales of your warmth, beautiful flower, o’er the eons be told!

Tales that will never get old!

“Awaken, O my heart

From your slumber

From your sleep”

Relief

She called today

Set aright my troubled mind that had gone amiss

My mind, which was painfully caught

In the gears of this gigantic mechanism

We refer to as life

But she did call

And now everything is better.

“Some actions are worth the possible consequences

No matter how much you put yourself in harm’s way

Love is one such action”

Consequence

Head first

That’s the way I always do it

At least lately anyway

Head first

Not contemplating the possible outcomes

Of my actions

Regardless of

The consequences

Once bitten, twice shy?

Not so!

At what age did this author write that anyway?

Did he or she, go through all of life’s

Possible situations?

I unfortunately, have proven it incorrect

Is it better

To not have loved at all

Than to have loved and lost?

Or is it healthy to, every once in a while

Put your emotions through the wringer?

“I love you

Such a wonderful phrase

Or such wonderfully deceitful phrase!”

Do You Really?

You say you love me

Yet you thrust into my heart a blade

Twisting it, turning it, leaving my trust betrayed

The reasons why, I cannot see

Yet you stare and

You say you love me?

You say you love me

So why forego all my years of sacrifice

Was all my pain not worth the price?

From your father and me, you hide things so carefully

Then you stare and

Say you love me?

O if I could repay the debt

Take back all the tears that have been wept

I would do things better, do things differently

You person in the mirror, why do you stare

And

Say you love me?

“The darkest part of night is just before dawn

Or so I have heard”

Just before Dawn

I know you’re out there

Somewhere trying to hide from me

This darkness, I shall have no fear

I’ll toil just a little while longer

I know you will not forsake me

O Dawn

It’s now the darkest night

But when you return all will be right

Come to me now

Brighten my life, my day, somehow

Don’t forget me

O Dawn.

Passion

I remember how I used to feel

Those innocent moments I used to steal . . .

“So wonderful, this voyage we call life

She’s so beautiful, what a lovely voice

So lovely

Oh no! Where did those rocks come from?

We’re going to crash! Take evasive action . . .”

Siren

Sing to me

Again

Unleashing passions in me

Thought long ago released

Stirring up emotions in me

Thought long ago deceased

My siren of resurrection

Bringing about emotional insurrection

This shouldn’t be happening

It seems so unreal

But I love the way

You make me feel!

Sing to me

Again.

“Have your cake and eat it too?

No, no, no!

Naughty, naughty!”

Discontent

I’m very happy I met her

I’m very sorry I met her

I’m happy I spoke to her

I never should have said a word to her

Isn’t it funny that the only hope for happiness

In my life

Lies within the embrace of

Another man’s wife?

“There are some experiences that are worth living over and over again

Fortunately we have memories”

Yesterday

Yesterday

I felt as if the world was mine

Felt passion so sensual, so divine

Living a life that should be lived by

Only the most deserved of men

Experiencing pleasure again and again

Yesterday

My emotions were racing wild

Emanating with the innocence of a newborn child

My heart was pounding quite heavily within my chest

My heart reigned among romances greats; Lord Byron, Shakespeare

Among the best

Yesterday

Was everything I experienced real?

Or am I destined to develop wounds that will never heal?

How long will these feelings I have last?

Or are they ordained to, once more, collect dust in my past?

Today

I feel good because of

Yesterday

Tomorrow

I’ll worry about, sometime later

But not now.

Hardship

The challenges in life we must face

The pain, as a result, we cannot erase . . .

“Do I go to the left?

Or to the right?”

Path

Where do I go now

Which path do I take

What a horrible feeling

Finding out that I’m mediocre

I have no life to give

Because I’m living a lie

I have no life to take

Because I’m afraid to die

I hate my life—Oh I forgot

What life!

So comfortable, yet

So hard

I seem to move forward an inch

Only to plummet back a yard!

“Are we so much different from our forefathers?

From our founding fathers?

Sad to say but

I think so”

Elián

What are you willing to die for?

Give your life in return for?

Maybe your country

The land of your birth

Is the quest for its freedom

Your life’s worth?

Would you fight for the right

For your children to be free?

Or would you turn and run away

Live to fight another day

To somewhere else, maybe overseas?

Why should I die, risk my health

My new opportunities, my new found wealth?

When my child can be free at someone else’s expense?

Something to think about? God bless America!!

“For every attempt we make in life we put ourselves at risk

Of being disappointed

So what do we do, stop trying?

No!”

Drain

How many times can one take

Disappointments drain?

What’s left inside after being let down

Again and again?

Sooner or later I imagine time will take its toll

Then only a cold lifeless shell of a man will remain

I can’t think right now, it hurts too much.

“You can’t usually tell what a person’s life is like

By their outward appearance

What situations they’re going through

Please be patient”

Drive

I met another one today

She had a wonderfully strong demeanor

I could see drive and determination in her

Another mother left to fend on her own, by herself

Another wife abandoned, thrown to the elements

Without any help

Battered, bruised

With nothing left to lose

Betrayed by the one who promised

To have and to hold

Now that story’s old . . .

She has to pick up the broken pieces

Her chance for a new life now increases

Another story begins anew.

“Is there a reason why we’re drawn to crowded places?

Why do we have to be with our so called friends?

Is there something we’re running away from?”

My Sovereignty, a dilemma

What will be the end result

Of this plight of the lonely?

Manic depression? Anti-social behavior? Suicide maybe?

What about psychosis, wouldn’t you inevitably

Lose touch with reality?

Well look at me

Tell me what you think

Do I seem to be PSYCHOTIC?

Do I appear to be in a panic?

Don’t wave around your conjectures as if you’re wielding a sword

Substantiate your opinions before uttering one word

YES I do find time to acquire objects of love, hate

While secretly needing to find someone with whom I can relate

But then I wouldn’t be able to thrive in this kingdom of self-pity

I’ve managed to create

Yes! This is my realm, I need nothing else to make me elate

Death to anyone who dares to topple my empire, who dares to

Desecrate!

So leave me be, I’ve earned this countenance I’ve attained.

I’m free of malice, hate, envy—HA! I HAVEN’T LOST, I’VE GAINED!

It will be a pleasure to keep away from this morbid world

Remain abstained

But what about love, happiness, tranquility, relationship

Without which we’ll all be deeply scarred, stained?

Just four words and the foundation of my dominion is already strained!

OK, I’ll think about it.

“What would you do if all your wants and desires were fulfilled?”

The Deciding Factor

Where were you

When I needed you?

When all my wants and desires

Cried out to you?

Please be near me

Embrace, envelope me

Every fiber of this body

Beckons to thee

I thought you loved me

Or at least liked me

O, if only you would

Bring salvation to me

So close

Though safely out of reach

Please . . .

Don’t tease . . .

I beseech.

Faith

Please God don’t make my punishment too bad

For all these impure thoughts I have had . . .

“Happy thoughts, happy thoughts!

Just think happy thoughts . . .”

FOE

Depression, and thy cohort frustration

Thou art formidable foes

Thou shall not be victorious

Though once again I am as mallard

Brought down from the sky

I shall turn the other cheek

I shall not die!

“No matter how you behave towards others

Always be true to yourself”

Indifference

Come on

Get your act together

And do not give me your usual

Nonchalant answer “whatever”

You must try

Have you ever thought of quitting?

Never!

Did you just lie to me? Yes

Honest, but not too clever

Sometimes it’s better to lie

This isn’t one of those times however

Don’t let go of your hope, don’t ever!

“Wouldn’t it be nice to actually live

Than just to survive?”

Forever

I want to live forever

So what’s to keep me from getting together

With that ever after eternal bliss?

Fear

The incurable disease

The effective paralyzer

The sedate tranquilizer

It stops me from getting near

I won’t be able to go there.

“Some tasks just aren’t worth doing

No matter how much you get paid!”

Traitor

Look at you lying there

Dead!

Should I have been in your place

Should I have been the betrayer in your stead?

I would say that, at least

You’re in a happier place

But even in heaven you would

Have had to live in disgrace

I wonder how many realize that

If you did not betray

Millions of souls would probably be lost today

How painfully ironic because

Even if it is true

The label of traitor is eternally linked to you

To think, the dishonor also spills over to our names

It could have easily been “The Book of Judas”

Instead of the “Book of James”!

I’m sure Jesus isn’t angry with you

He knew what had to be done

The roll of betrayer had to be played by someone

That someone had to be you I suppose

What a horrible task for a person to be held responsible for

What a horrible task to impose

I’m sorry though, that it had to be you

Nevertheless, I’m happy to meet you

Go find peace in this darkness that never ends

I hope this will help your broken soul to mend

Another time, another place, we may have been good friends.

“After some decisions made

Wouldn’t it be nice if someone awoke you and

You realized it was all a bad dream?”

My Shame

30 pieces of silver

It wasn’t even gold

I threw the lamb to the wolves

To the enemy, his life I sold

My name will always be held in contempt

Or so I’ve been told

It’s getting so dark

I feel so cold

I’m sorry master, I should have done better

I shouldn’t have lied

I should have resisted the temptation

Or at least tried

30 pieces of silver

Even if it were gold

Could I have been more righteous?

Been more bold?

No, I’m sorry for what was done

I was misled

Look at my body, there

Lifeless, broken

I’m glad I’m dead.

“There is a God . . .”

Faith

Without faith it is impossible to please God

To the uninformed this might seem quite odd

How can you trust something you cannot touch

Something you cannot see?

Is it wise? It isn’t even clever

I might as well believe in whatever!

That’s a bit much

Even for me

Have faith in God

In God we trust

I have to acknowledge the present

A must!

But I’m supposed to disregard things as such

So what is the key?

“How can something so beautiful cause so much pain?

Look but don’t touch!”

The Rose

Oh the beauty!

My eyes doth see

Beauty created so perfectly

Be it a meadow or in a garden be

Who placed you there so lovingly?

Oh, the beauty

My eyes doth see

Beauty created so perfectly

So simple, so calm, please tell me

Can you be compared

To the Lily of the Valley?

Who was scorned, rejected, crucified but yet

Was beauty incarnate?

No, I say! Though leaved and thorned

Only in death will you be scorned!

In life you were adored, your beauty did show

Perhaps the triumph of the lily one day you will know

But until then, although I stand in awe

I can only lament on the beauty my eyes saw.

“No matter how much to the contrary it seems

We have a choice

I believe that the choices we make

Ultimately determine our fate”

Master of My Fate

Get outta here

Unruly

Unworthy

Junkie

Ever wavering

Ever un-giving

Life undisciplined

Servant of God!

Right!

Do you hear me?

Yes, but I listen not

Do you fear me?

Yes, but serve you I cannot

But you must or you’ll die

I know, I try

Days of progress destroyed

By one second’s lie

I love you still.

Anguish

How the ghosts of ‘what ifs’ or

‘What might have been’ continually haunt,

So conveniently explained, but why can’t we get

Everything we want?

“For most of us it’s easier to remain in our present horrible situations

Than to endure the pain of change

Change for a better life”

Taint

Look into my eyes

Go ahead

Look again

Do you see the taint on my soul

Describe to me, tell me

What you see

How can I be made whole?

Look into my heart

Do you feel betrayed?

Tell me

Is it love or

Is it hate that’s conveyed

Or even worse . . .

Indifference

Should I have left

Even though I stayed?

Be good, why even try

When all this time I’m living a lie

Tell the truth.

“Sometimes nothing is more damaging or misleading

Than someone else’s perception of you

Try to be yourself”

Truth

Maybe what my mother said is right

Maybe I’m no better than a mangy dog

No cleaner than a filthy hog

Maybe she said it out of spite

Maybe what my mother said is right

Maybe the way I feel towards my father is wrong

Maybe like him I’m destined to become

Just another penniless, shameless bum

I try to be different, try to be strong

Maybe the way I feel towards my father is wrong

Maybe there’s a real reason why I feel like this

Maybe I was born to be used

To finally end up tossed aside like well worn shoes

Somebody put me on God’s sh*#t list

Maybe there’s a real reason why I feel like this.

Maybe crying isn’t so wrong

Maybe not if it helps to alleviate the pain

To remove from my soul this scarlet stain

It may be better than saying “so long”

Maybe crying isn’t so wrong.

“And today is the first day of the rest of your life!

Aren’t you happy?

O just shut up”

Pain

This night

The hue, the dark

I do believe that I am the lowest

Of this race

Augment this body

With this face

I myself hate

Awaiting some vicious demise

Some awful fate

I live

I hate

To die

I wait

Apathy, yes

Hope?

Surely you jest.

“Isn’t it fascinating how we find ourselves falling back into old habits”

Distress

I feel myself sinking

This quicksand

I can feel it

Flowing into my esophagus

It is overpowering

What dire consequences!

I’m rescued

I’m grateful

But I feel myself going back.

It beckons to me

This quicksand

What dire consequences!

But yet

I jump right back in!

Rescue me

Please.

“As humans it seems we need to go through adversities, frustrations, etc.

To get better, to get stronger

Keyword: Through”

Within

When shall I give in

To thou, creature within?

To partake in thy thievery, thy lies

To meddle in thy sin?

To thou all my troubles tie

Hopes, joys, dreams gone awry.

What shall incur with innocence’s last breath?

Separate from me this bed, in which I lie.

I shall fight thee, creature within, to the death!

Finally justifying all the tears I have wept

O no! Easily thou will not win,

Forever I will sustain this struggle I have kept.

Die! Die! Creature within!

Remove thyself from beneath my skin

My history is now the past

Allow me my life, my freedom begin.

“It would be good if most people realize that

We don’t have a choice of the shell we are given at birth

Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful

Don’t hate me because I’m not!”

Race

I peer into the black

It has nothing to offer me,

I am of no color, so I close my eyes

But it’s only the black I see.

I peer into the black

Scarred by years of intense envy

Scars, although shrouded by

Unnecessary shadows

Cry out “Heal me, Heal me’”

“Do not, under mask of bigotry

Attack me, conceal me!”

In the black I see me

And I lick my wounds.

I peer into the black and

Sharing its struggle against self-esteem

Sharing the burden

The pain

Not knowing whether to feel proud

Or ashamed.

I stare and

I feel

I laugh in its joy

I lament in its sorrow.

Its shade begins to envelope me

It’s marvelous tone, hue so right

But then

I stumble into the light . . .

. . . Don’t step on me because I’m not white!

“What do you do about that one that got away?

Ok, that’s enough about spilt milk . . .”

The Only One

You are

The only one left

Who can stir what emotion

Lies inside me.

You are

The only one who

Captivates the imagination

That my mind’s eyes see.

What am I

Supposed to do?

I have no right

To impose my feelings on you!

I’ll just stay here

In my own private hell

Slowly becoming a cold

Emotionless shell

Everything heals with time?

I guess only time will tell.

Introspection

I see the real me sometimes when I look inside,

I have a problem when it and these other imposters collide.

Inside, deep inside . . .

“What kind of man was he?

Did he love his family?

Did he care for his friends?

Did he give his all in all his endeavors?

This will probably be the only time

What others think will matter to me”

Advent

In the advent of my possible death

And we are all bound to die,

I wound like to dispense of a terrible lie

I lacked strength

I was weak.

I’m so tired

Tired of trying

Slowly dying

Inside.

The failure

The deceitful demeanor

The lies I have to tell.

I can no longer distinguish what is true

Oh well!

We only live once

But what a way to live!

Aren’t you supposed to give of yourself

Until there’s nothing left to give?

And then receive your reward

Come on, take it like a man

But you won’t, will you

Coward!

“How can you love someone else

If you don’t love yourself?”

Esteem

Tell me again

Tell me you love me.

You sit back and judge me

Then you come close and indulge me.

This only serves to confuse me

You do not hesitate to abuse me.

With your words and your tortuous lies

You demon in your angel disguise!

Tell me again

Tell me you love me.

Say it once more, it might convince me

Which lost soul have you managed to fool since me?

Am I the one you’re trying to persuade?

Pretending to be savior, to be my aide?

Sometime soon I will be better and know what to do

I’ll develop the courage to stop listening to you.

“Be yourself”

Me

I am

Grateful

Thoughtful

Sensitive

Humorous

Encouraging

All because of

“Do unto others as you

Would have them do

Unto you”

“Regret: A terrible thing

I should have . . .

I could have . . .

Why didn’t I?”

CAT

It’s now over

I am certain

Now sure

Hell awaits me.

I have to do it

Not for me anymore

For them?

For the games I play?

No

For my cat that went astray.

“To develop friendship, you must first show yourself friendly

But not too friendly”

Eventually

I’m devious

Sometimes mischievous!

I do not dare

You’re unaware.

Sneaky was once used to describe

Silence was often prescribed.

With a smile, with a compliment—let it begin!

I wait patiently. I get under your skin.

Days, weeks, months or even years then

Finally getting to the end,

You get me as a good friend.

“I have forgiven

I just wish I could forget”

The Person I Knew

I want you to know my name

Know you’re not the one to blame

I forgive you anyway

Because my father would do the same.

For your narrow mindedness and bigotry

For the terrible way you treated me

For the thoughts in my head, may God forgive me!

After all, you’re blind, these things you don’t see.

I forgive you Mark Anthony McDonald

It’s all I can do

I will be praying too.

Praying for your salvation, may God have mercy on you.

“Life has an uncanny way of rewarding us in the present

From seeds we had sown in the past

Good or bad”

My Fire

Innocence denied from a soul lost

Still above the waves though thrown and tossed.

A heart more cold than winter’s coldest frost

The fire awaits, the fire awaits.

The truth in the eyes of the beholder is seldom true

The skeletons in your closet are speaking to you.

Eat this drink that, telling you what to do

The fire awaits!

The fire awaits, your flesh to burn.

Do not deny it, soon it will be your turn!

This life of yours is no longer your concern

The fire awaits.

But what’s that over the horizon I see?

A second, no, a third chance beckoning to me!

What do I do now, what will become of me?

“I want to be

All I was created to be

Better, smarter, wiser

Isn’t there a pill I can buy for that?

No? Oh well”

Average

What makes a person average?

Is it a lack of ambition?

Lack of a clear cut mission?

No real commitment to anything

No conviction?

I think not giving your all, in whichever endeavor

Reinforces a certain behavior.

Then one becomes average

Then begins the irreparable damage

But we don’t know, so we

Don’t care!

But I know too much already I fear.

Et Al

And elsewhere . . .

“Each of us deserves a second chance

Sometimes even a third”

Left, Right, Wrong?

A man left

With nothing to lose.

Left with no choices

From which to choose

A man right

After a life of knowing only wrong.

Right about the only thing

That might allow him to belong

He’s dead!

Inside, may as well be without!

He has nothing left

To care about.

Has nothing right

To be faithfully devout.

A prisoner in his own life,

All because of a wife

The source of his strife?

Should that man be left up

To his own ingenuity?

Would it be right to

Let him loose upon society?

How Can You, Mozart?

How can you, Mozart

With works worthy of praise

Be so childish in all your ways ?

Your passions, dedication

Towards music I see

But at what cost: your commerce

Your health, your humanity ?

O, how early you started

Indeed all too well

Of your life, young Mozart

There are wondrous stories to tell!

Concerto at age four

First opera at age twelve

Was not pride instilled within yourself?

So what about the quality of your life, Mozart

The nature, the principle, the mere essence?

But what IS quality?

Distinguishing characteristics, degree of excellence

The quality of your life, if one should ask

Is one of quite a low middle class

You could have lived better!

No avail

Only composing, writing

Your work must entail

You’re not even concerned

With bare necessities

Yet you drink much wine, frolic with women

Attend many parties

You love your work

Yes this I can see

But I think you should

Review your priorities!

How can you, Mozart

Make this clear to me

Your name is renowned

Yet a pauper you be?

Where is the love?

Where is the care?

Do you think this

To your family is fair?

O Mozart!

You work and you slave

All your life to music you gave!

For what?

To be buried in an unmarked grave!

But from all this at least one thing can be found

Your work, your music, is known the world around

So the quality of your life, Mozart?

Your life is sheer genius

Your life is art!

“Me, me, me!

Always look out for number one!

Right?

Wrong!”

What Would You Say

Tell me what you’d say

If on a particular day

I said I hated you.

Jump to a conclusion? You’d probably delay

Because you’d know I wasn’t that way

And what I said was not true.

ANYWAY . . .

Tell me what you’d say

If free drugs they gave away

COCAINE, crack, heroin even

On what foundation would society’s conscience lay

BUT THERE’S NO MORE CRIME MAN, hurray?

What new label would moral be given?

LABEL: IDIOCY

Solve society’s problems, I won’t even try

I have problems of my own to get me by

And this might seem cruel, thoughtless I know

But not lend a hand to someone who might even die!

Believing it’s their problem, none of my business—A LIE

I DON’T THINK SO!

BUT . . .

A lot of us this way we behave

For ourselves we work, we slave

And why not? Who’s gonna take care of No. 1 if not me?

But if just for a moment you stopped pursuing what you crave

And to someone less fortunate a gift of love, even life you gave

You might enjoy that feeling—to know that YOU made a change—you’ll see

SO . . .

Tell me what you’d say

If from that selfish mentality I stay

And said I was willing to make a change?

I’m going to start right now, today

This voice deep inside me I’ll obey

In these acts of fulfillment, unselfishness I’ll engage

I don’t know what you’d say, but I’d say Good for you!

“Good friends are hard to find

Fight to keep them”

Ode

Imagine the way life is

With its twists and turns:

This road of life one must take

Some things stand fast—the ones you love

The friends you make.

You never know what’s around the next corner

Each bad experience you try to endure

All the good ones, like treasure

You secure.

Imagine the way life is

How intricate, how profound:

Just like a piece of fine china

Crashing to the ground.

The nature of life

Is so fragile, I’ve found

Snuffed out here

Created there

For those who take it for granted

Please beware!

Imagine the way life is

With its twists and turns

With all its losses

And happy returns.

It exists, we humans, to confound

Imagine the way life is

How intricate, how profound.

“A relationship is an exercise in give and take

Perfection is nonexistent

Love at first sight?—I wish”

Doubt

Love sometimes leaves a distaste,

In your mouth

In your heart.

It often seems like such a waste

Overshadowed by doubt

Right from the start

Am I the one for you?

Are you the one for me?

10 years from now will we feel the same?

Where will this relationship be?

Very well then, let’s give it a go

Will our love stand the test of time?

I don’t know.

I know this much though

Happiness is all I seek.

I will always look to the future positively

No matter how bleak.

“The end or

The beginning

You choose but

Choose wisely”

Closer

Did I help you move

Closer

Towards a better life?

To being counted among the wise?

Or

Did I help you take one step

Closer to mediocrity?

Closer to your demise?

Table of Contents

Cover

Misery Doesn’t Always Love Company

Copyright

Contents

Life

Change

My Mother’s Chair

Why

Complacency

Thief

For You (Thanks to an employer)

Dance

Free

Red

Love

Jackie

Relief

Consequence

Do You Really?

Just before Dawn

Passion

Siren

Discontent

Yesterday

Hardship

Path

Elián

Drain

Drive

My Sovereignty, a dilemma

The Deciding Factor

Faith

FOE

Indifference

Forever

Traitor

My Shame

Faith

The Rose

Master of My Fate

Anguish

Taint

Truth

Pain

Distress

Within

Race

The Only One

Introspection

Advent

Esteem

Me

CAT

Eventually

The Person I Knew

My Fire

Average

Et Al

Left, Right, Wrong?

How Can You, Mozart?

What Would You Say

Ode

Doubt

Closer