contents

Copyright

Acknowledgements

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Sixteen

Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Eighteen

Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Twenty

Epilogue

Preview - The Touch

Mercy for the Wicked

Fallen [2]

Lisa Olsen

(2011)

Rating: ★★★★☆

Tags: angels and demons

angels and demonsttt

Mercy for the Wicked gets off to a running start, as we pick up right where the last book left off with Mercy finally filling in dependable boyfriend Detective Ben Gates on her trouble with angels. Of course she glosses over the fact that she's still secretly lusting over sexy, fallen angel Adam and we can count on Adam not to stay away for too long, despite his best intentions for keeping her safe. It's encouraging to see Mercy take more of an active role in her plight, no longer the damsel in distress. Mercy for the Wicked introduces a cast of new characters including fallen angel Azazael who wants to use Mercy to escape his dark prison, and a host of demons who kidnap Mercy for their own agenda. We find answers to many lingering questions left by Angel of Mercy, but just as many new ones surface for an eagerly awaited sequel.

Product Description

"How do you tell a guy you're being stalked by demons without sounding like a fruitcake? Even if he really cares about you, there's bound to be that moment when he looks at you like you're a total nutbar, right?"

Mercy is back, and in a world of trouble as factions from above and below vie for her attention, pulling her from the carefully constructed 'normalcy' of her life. After confessing all to boyfriend Ben, Mercy is counting on fallen angel Samael to help protect her while she deals with the sting of Adam's abandonment. But self control has never been Adam's strong suit. When Mercy is pursued from all sides, will Adam be able to resist playing the hero? Or will Mercy get tired of waiting and save herself? In the end, Mercy must decide, is the enemy of her enemy her friend? Or just a worse enemy?

Mercy for the Wicked

By

Lisa Olsen

Copyright © 2011 Lisa Olsen, all rights reserved.

This book is sold subject to the conditions that it shall not, by way of trade or otherwise, be lent, re-sold, hired out, copied, or otherwise circulated without the publisher’s prior consent in any other format or changed in any way, including the author’s name and title, and without a similar condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser.

This is a work of fiction.  Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination, or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.  The use of any real person, company or product names are for literary effect only and used without permission.  The publisher does not have any control over and does not assume any responsibility for third-party websites or their content.

Visit the author’s website at http://www.lisaolsen.net

Acknowledgements

Thanks to my family for being supportive in this new endeavor, you make it much easier to devote so much time to the creative process.  Especially Emily, who powered through the proofreading in one night!  Thanks to the ladies of Havensport for their feedback and support.  Thanks to Randi Pandi for kickin’ it from P-Town like it’s old school style.  And to my husband James, my dove, my sweet, my dulcet darling… thanks for such great cover art as usual, for designing a whole new one when I changed my mind, and for not complaining (too much) when I went back to his original design.

Chapter One

How do you tell a guy you’re being stalked by demons without sounding like a fruitcake?  Even if he really cares about you, there’s bound to be that moment when he looks at you like you’re a total nutbar, right?

Don’t get me wrong, Ben was great, which is why I was so hesitant to drag him into all of my drama.  I’d fought long and hard to restore a bit of normalcy into my life, not all that easy to do when you’re not exactly human anymore.  Not that I’m some kind of monster or freak, or a vampire… No, this story is about angels and demons, and I fall somewhere in between them for the most part.

My name is Merceline Renault, though everybody calls me Mercy (except my mother).  When I’m not wrapped up in all things supernatural I’m a bartender at a little club named Eden in downtown Seattle.  I don’t look particularly angelic, unlike my best friend Daphne, who is the epitome of innocent beauty with her perfect, long, blonde curls and bright blue eyes.  Well, I do have the blue eyes now.  Ever since I picked up the angelic Grace, it transformed my dark brown eyes to a luminous, cerulean blue; a startling contrast against my dark hair.  It took a little while to get used to in the mirror, but most people assumed I wore color contacts, so it wasn’t all that difficult to explain the change.

Ben was completely in the dark about it all, not an easy feat considering the fact that he’s a cop, one of the nosiest professions in the universe.  I often wondered, was Ben a cop because he was nosy, or was he nosy because he was a cop?  There was no time to get into a chicken/egg debate with myself. Not when Ben stared expectantly at me in the club, since I’d uttered the magic words, ‘we have to talk’.

“Okay, let’s talk,” he nodded equably, and I was remarkably impressed by his restraint.  Sam had just left after delivering particularly disturbing news and I knew Sam wasn’t on Ben’s list of favorite people.  It probably had to do with the fact that he thought Sam was a criminal.  Technically that was true.  Does it count as being a criminal when the laws you break are at God’s behest?  Sam didn’t seem to think he was subject to human laws, don’t get me started about that.

“Not here,” I replied, my eyes traveling to where our friends gathered.  Daphne shot me a smile with a little shrug, thankfully giving me the space to handle it, even though I knew she must have been dying of curiosity once she’d seen Sam leave.

“Alright, where then?”

“Let’s go back to my place.  It’ll be better if we can talk in private, and this… could take a while.”  I tugged on his hand, leaving the bar behind and leading him to the door.

“Hey, where are you guys going?  The party’s just getting started!” Parker called out, sounding disappointed to see us go.  The Halloween party at Eden was kicking into full swing, and it was way too early for us to leave.

I made my voice light, belying the anxiety roiling inside since Sam’s visit knocked me for a loop.  “Sorry boss!  Something came up I have to deal with, we’ll try to come back later.”  I know, that was a total lie. I knew in my heart we wouldn’t be coming back that night, but he did look somewhat relieved at hearing it.

“Is everything alright, Mercy?”  Daphne appeared at my elbow, and I gave her a strained smile.

“I don’t know yet,” I whispered, “I’ll call you later, okay?”

She leaned closer. “You’re going to tell him everything?”

Great job Daph, he’s standing right there… What if I wasn’t about to tell him everything?  “Yep, that’s the plan.  We’ve gotta go though.”

Daphne nodded, laying a hand on Ben’s arm.  “Go easy on her.”

“Uh… yeah, sure,” Ben blinked, not quite sure how to take her remark, and I urged him towards the door before it could get any more uncomfortable.  “Mercy, what is this about?” he asked as soon as we stepped into the cool night air.  My eyes tried to look everywhere at once, a bit of paranoia setting in, despite Sam’s assurance I wasn’t in that grave of danger.

“Wait ‘til we get to my apartment,” I replied in a tone that brooked no argument.  “Follow me over, alright?”  I wanted to have my car available in case the conversation didn’t go over very well.  Luckily, Ben didn’t argue, instead he gave me one of those long suffering sighs that let me know he was trying to be patient.

The whole drive over I wasn’t sure whether to keep my eyes on the skies or every shadowy corner on the ground.  Given the fact that it was late October in full darkness, there were shadows a plenty.  After I nearly missed a red light, I decided I was being ridiculous.  Nothing was going to come bounding out at me from the darkness.  No, the new threat was much more subtle if Sam was to be believed.  Otherwise, I think he would have stuck around, whether Adam wanted him to or not.

Adam.

The name alone still had the power to rile me up, and depending on the day, it could be either in a good way or a bad way.  On a bad day, he made me so frustrated, I hoped I’d never see his smirking face again.  But on a good day… On a good day I could still feel the warmth of his breath on my neck, the rasp of his cheek against me, the feel of his lips chasing after mine, and the rush of pleasure mingled with pain as I felt him say goodbye.

A honk of the horn drew me out of my reverie, a flush of guilt creeping over me as I sat in the car daydreaming about another guy while my boyfriend waited patiently for me to move through the green light.  Best to forget about Adam for the time being, and focus on the problem at hand.

On the street outside my apartment building, I waited for Ben to get out of his car before I got out of mine, wanting his comforting presence before I risked the darkened stairs on my own.  My four story apartment building wasn’t big enough to have an elevator and most of the time the stairwell didn’t bother me, but since my imagination had been kicked into overdrive, I wasn’t taking any chances.  My cat, Mimsy, came running to greet us with one of her squeaky meows, and Ben leaned down to give her a pat while I hung up my purse and coat.

“Would you like something to drink?” I offered, a little nervous now that we were alone.

“No, I’m good.” He shook his head, handing over his coat.

“Are you hungry?  I know you were expecting food at the party…”

“Mercy…” His one word spoke volumes, and I knew he knew I was stalling.

Alright, maybe I was stalling, but what would you have done in my place?  I still had no idea what I’d actually say to him.  “Right,” I nodded, moving to take a seat on the couch.  “You’re probably wondering what Sam’s visit was about?”

“That has been on my mind, yes,” he said mildly.

“And I know I haven’t been exactly open in telling you much about him…”

“Or anything about him.”

I deserved that.  We did have a history with a few… rough patches, and my need for keeping secrets was at direct odds with the nosiness of him being a cop.  Sam and Adam were both at the center of the rough patch that had almost broken us up for good.  “Because it wasn’t my secret to tell,” I interjected. “Not exactly.  When you hear why, I think you’ll understand.”

“I’m waiting,” he prompted.

“He’s an angel.”  Ben’s expression didn’t change, not at first, as he waited to see if I’d say more.  As the silence stretched between us, I felt the need to elaborate.  “You know, as in from heaven, with wings?”  Though I’d never seen his wings, Sam said it was a sin of pride to show them.

“An angel.”

“Well, a fallen angel, but he used to be a regular one originally.”

“Mercy…”

“I’m serious.  He’s a real live fallen angel who was cast out of heaven for his sins, and when I was knifed in the alley attack he healed me with his Grace.”  Ben’s expression was dumbstruck, and I could tell this wasn’t what he’d been expecting to hear at all.  “Only, when he healed me, some of that Grace sorta… rubbed off and now I’ve got some of it too.”

“What’s that supposed to mean, it rubbed off on you?”  His brows drew together into a single dark line.

“It means I’m not entirely human anymore.  Not quite superhuman, but not an angel either.  Something new, Sam likes to say.”  All it meant was I had a few nifty parlor tricks, and I was on God’s radar.

“You seriously expect me to believe you’re not human?”

“Why would I make up something like that?”

“Because you’ve slipped a gear?”  Ben rose from the couch, his hand scratching the back of his neck as he paced in agitation.

See, I was right, he thought I was a fruitcake.  “Do you want me to prove it?”

“Yeah, this I’ve got to see,” he muttered, coming to stop across the coffee table from me.

Only I wasn’t sure what to do.  Sure I could see auras (his was a pretty, deep indigo color that I normally found soothing), my Grace protected me like my own personal stun gun whenever I was afraid (I didn’t relish the idea of zapping him with that), and I was getting better at healing, but I didn’t think he’d let me near him to test that out.  That left just one thing.  “Alright then, close your eyes.”

“Close my… what are you going to do?”  Skeptical didn’t even begin to cover the look on his face.

“I’m not going to do anything to you, just… fine, don’t close your eyes then.  Look at the kitchen for a sec.”  That was all I needed to make myself disappear.  Not quite as good as invisible, but when he looked back I was gone.  As long as I didn’t speak, I was pretty much imperceptible.  Only I hadn’t prepared him for that, so of course he though I’d taken off.

Ben frowned at seeing the empty spot on the couch.  “Running away isn’t going to solve anything,” he called out in the direction of the bedroom.

“I’m not running, I’m showing you what you asked me to,” I said calmly, breaking the effect and popping back into view.  Ben immediately took another step backwards, almost colliding with my TV.

“Where did you… how…?”

“I told you, I got some of his angelic powers with the Grace.”

“Copperfield can do that on stage, it doesn’t make him an angel,” he insisted stubbornly and I rose with a drawn out sigh.

“Fine…”  Stepping up to the dish drainer, I grabbed a knife, little thinking how a cop might react to such a move.

“Put the knife down, Mercy,” Ben approached slowly, one hand stretched out entreatingly, the other moving slowly closer to his belt.  Was he carrying a gun?  Had he really gone to a Halloween party armed for trouble?

“I’m not gonna hurt you,” I rolled my eyes, lifting the knife to the inside of my arm.  I hated that part.  “Look…”

“Don’t…”  Forgetting about the gun, Ben rushed me, grabbing for the knife but not before I slashed it across my arm, the cut instantly welling up with blood. “Christ, Mercy, what the hell were you thinking?” he demanded, tossing the knife into the sink.

“It’s fine,” I winced, grabbing a paper towel off the counter because I didn’t want blood all over the place before I could concentrate enough to heal it.  “Relax, okay?  Ben?”  I tried again because he went back to pacing.  “Could you just… come over here and watch?  Can you do that for me?  Please?”

“Mercy…” he started to protest, but I cut him off.

“Please?  Let me do this.  I swear you’re gonna be amazed.”  Gratified to see Ben come to a decision that at least was willing to give me the benefit of the doubt, he approached me warily as if he expected me to pull out another knife at any moment.

I wasn’t the best at healing traumatic wounds, mostly because my concentration wasn’t what it should be whenever blood gushed.  Sore muscles, headaches, minor aches and pains, that was more my speed, and much less obvious when I was the one doing the healing.  A cut like that one I could manage though.  Dropping the paper towel, I cupped my hand over the wound, focusing on sending the Grace out to work its magic.  A soft, golden glow emanated from my hand, bathing the injury in warm light.  As we watched, the skin knit itself together as if the cut was being erased, leaving no trace of it except for the spilled blood.

“Now there, you see?”  I said softly, wiping away the remains of the blood before I looked up at him.  “Ben?” I repeated, because his eyes were a little wild.  “Ben, it’s alright, I promise.  Maybe you should sit down…”

“Yes, maybe I should,” he nodded, looking a little shell shocked.  “How did you do that?”

What had I been saying for the past fifteen minutes?  “I told you, I have some of Sam’s Grace.  That gives me the ability to heal and it lets me move about unseen if I want to.”

“What else can you do?”

My brows drew together with a touch of annoyance.  Did he expect me to perform like a trained monkey all night, or were we going to get to the real reason why I’d come clean about all of it?  “You’re missing the point here.  Do you believe me now when I say that I’ve got angelic powers?”

Dumbly, he nodded.

“Good,” I sank onto the couch beside him, my head spinning a little because I’d forgotten to ground myself before using my healing.  I let him process it all for a moment while I tried to connect to the calming energy of the Earth, sending out roots like a tree in my imagination.

“Sam’s an angel then?”  His voice surprised me, and I opened my eyes to see him watching me warily.

“Yep, a fallen angel.”

“That means he was kicked out of heaven?  What did he do?”

I could practically see the wheels turning in his mind.  For whatever reason, he was bound and determined to see Sam as a bad guy.  It was laughable, since Sam was the most gentle, honorable man I knew.  If you could overlook the whole angel of death part of his past, that was.  “I… can’t get into that,” I shook my head.  Telling him what was going on with me was one thing, spilling all of Sam’s deep, dark secrets was quite another.

“And that Adam guy… he’s not your cousin, is he?”

“It depends on your definition of…”  Ben gave me a look and I felt a twist of guilt for having been caught in another lie.  “No, he’s not,” I shook my head.  “He’s another fallen angel.”

“Another… how many of these guys are there?”

“Enough to all know each other, not enough they need a secret handshake,” I stole Adam’s glib reply when I’d asked the same question.

“And this has been going on for months?  How…?”  Ben covered his face with his hands, suddenly appearing very tired when he looked up again.  “Why are you telling me all of this now?  What did Sam tell you tonight that’s got you all mixed up?”

“Yeah, about that…” I took a shaky breath as Sam’s warning bubbled up into the forefront of my thoughts.  “Well, like I said, I’m not exactly an angel, and not strictly human anymore, but I’ve been making it work for me.  You might have noticed things have settled down since Adam and Sam took off for parts unknown.”

“I had noticed that, yes,” Ben propped his arm on the back of the couch, face resting in his hand.

“The Big Guy hasn’t decided what to do with me yet, so I’ve been in kind of a holding pattern.”  I pointed upwards in case my meaning wasn’t clear, and he seemed to be tracking with me.  “Only he’s not the only one whose interest I’ve attracted. There’s a demon, Azazael, who was imprisoned for doing all sorts of terrible things.  I’m a little fuzzy on what they were ‘cause Sam didn’t go into it all that much.  Anyway, the scuttlebutt is, Azazael is looking for a way to break free from the prison he’s been kept in for the past few millennia and he thinks I’m the key to doing it.”

“How?  What does he want to do to you?”

“I’m not sure, I was a little distracted by the idea that he’s evil and stalking me,” I swallowed.  “There was something about a prophecy, and him being reborn to the world through the vessel, which is me.  Sam said not to worry… but he also broke Adam’s cardinal rule by coming to warn me.”

Ben digested that for long seconds, and God only knew what he thought about it all.  “Well, okay then.”  He slapped his hands on his knees with a decisive nod and I blinked, unsure if I’d missed his conclusion.

“Okay then,” I repeated.  “Then you believe me?”

“Do I believe you’re an angel?  Yeah, that’s not too much of a stretch.”  He gave me a crooked smile that made my heart melt.  It was his smile that first attracted me to him, it transformed his whole face and charmed the cynic right out of me.  “The rest of it… it’s going to take a little time to absorb I think.  But the big issue at stake here isn’t whether or not I believe you, it’s whether or not this Azazael poses a real threat to you, or if it’s a bunch of superstitious mumbo jumbo.”

“Sam seemed to think it was a big enough deal to warn me about it.  But he was also a little light on the details of how Azazael planned to get to me.  He gets like that sometimes, it’s hard to get a straight answer out of him.  Though to be fair, I was too surprised to see him to ask many questions.”

“That settles it, you’re coming to stay with me again.”  Ben had his resolved face on, but I wasn’t so sure it was a good idea.

“I don’t know Ben, we don’t know when or even if this guy is gonna come after me. I can’t move in with you indefinitely.”  Besides, it wasn’t like he could save me against a demon anyway, and I hated to put him in harm’s way.

“Sure you can.”  His eyes met mine, and I realized he was serious.  We were having that conversation on top of everything else.

“You want me to move in with you?”

“Sure, why not?  You have to admit we get along great, and I liked having you there the first time.  Plus, there’s no safer place for you than living with a cop, right?”

I could think of a safer place, but I quickly squashed the thought away.  He wasn’t saying the L word either, but I got the impression it was mostly because he was afraid I wouldn’t say it back.  Did I love Ben?  It was hard to give him my heart when part of it was so far away and I never knew if I’d get it back again.  I did care about him an awful lot, and it hurt to see the look in his eyes when he saw I wasn’t going to go for it.  I found myself shaking my head, not wanting to make a bad decision just because I was scared.  “I think I’d rather stay at my own place. For now.”  I reached out for his hand to soften the blow, relieved when he didn’t pull away.

“What does this mean for us?” he asked, cradling my hand on his lap.

“I have no idea.” A long sigh left my lips at the admission.  “You can see now why I didn’t come out and tell you all of this before.”

“No actually, I don’t.  Why didn’t you tell me all of this from day one?”

I couldn’t help but roll my eyes at that one.  “Oh yeah, you would have run screaming for the hills.”

Ben held tight to my hand, “I begged you, Mercy, to let me in.  Don’t you remember?  Does that seem like the kind of guy who’d run for the hills?”

My mind cast back to the day he’d followed me to Sam’s apartment, convinced I was into something illegal.  “You thought I was into drugs or something!  How was I supposed to say ‘angel’?”

“What was I supposed to think?  You were sneaking around, hanging out in a bad part of town with lowlifes…”

“Sam is not a lowlife, he’s an angel for chrissakes!”  My cheeks burned hot as I working myself up into a good head of steam.

“Excuse me for not thinking outside the box!  I’m a cop, Mercy, not a psychic.”

“I was gonna tell you everything that day before you started demanding answers,” I reminded him, and it was true.  It was only after he jumped to asinine conclusions that I clamped up tight and threw him out.

“I don’t want to fight with you!”

“Then don’t yell at me!”

“You stop yelling at me first!” he demanded.

“I’m not yelling!” I yelled, my eyes falling shut as I tried to get ahold of my temper.  “I’m sorry…”

“No, I’m sorry, Mercy. I’m not trying to make this worse, I swear.”  Ben rubbed at his temples, only then realizing he still wore the raggedy bandage around his head, the remnants of his Halloween costume.

“Here, let me help you with that.”  Leaning closer, I pulled the rest of the bandage off, sending healing energy to soothe the tension headache I could feel growing.

“Thank you,” Ben covered my hand with his, his eyes closing with a drawn out sigh as the tension eased out of him.  If only I could manage the same thing for myself, but I’ve never been able to do anything about my own headaches.  Too hard to concentrate, I guess.

“Will you stay tonight?” I asked, my voice soft and soothing, not wanting to break the tentative calm between us.

“Of course, if you want me to.” He opened his eyes, pressing a kiss to the palm of my hand that lingered by his brow.  “Do you really want to go back to that party?”  His brows came up a fraction.

“No, I was being polite. Parker went to all that trouble, but I don’t feel like being around anybody tonight.  Except for you,” I added quickly.

“Come here…” Ben pulled me into his lap, holding me close.  “Try not to worry so much.  Whatever it is that’s coming, I’ll keep you safe.”

I nodded automatically, snuggling against his comforting warmth.  But deep inside, I wasn’t so sure.

Chapter Two

I was floating.

Great snowy wings teased the edges of my eyesight, offering a plausible explanation as to why I hovered so far above the ground - if you could accept the idea that I’d grown wings as plausible.  The landscape floated past at a sedate pace, no sign of any city or civilization to give me a clue where on Earth I was.  The world was a study in rich greens and clear blues of the countryside, with soft rolling hills below and vast snow capped mountains surrounding the valley.  I knew I could reach those mountain tops in the blink of an eye and taste snow so pure it would be a shame to sully it with my human hands.  No, not human hands… I looked down and saw they emanated the same golden glow I saw around angels.

A spot of color caught my eye, a rich swath of deep purple and gold, and I glided down to get a better look.  On a field of verdant green, an open air boudoir was laid out, a four poster bed covered in rich, colorful fabrics on a sumptuous carpet.  There were even lamps lit on the matching bedside tables, though I didn’t stop to puzzle through how that was possible at the time.  Delicate white flower blossoms rode the breeze, perfuming the air in a fragrant snow and catching in my hair.  It was paradise.

On the bedside table stood a carafe of dark wine and two goblets, a pleasing array of exotic fruits beside it.  Normally I’m more of a pretzels and beer girl, but I can appreciate the classics.  It was a perfect setting and I had to wonder who’d gone through so much effort for little old me?  Soft and romantic wasn’t exactly Adam’s style, but I had to admit I was sorta hoping he’d put in an appearance.  Who else would go to so much trouble to create a dreamy, exquisite setting and plop such a great big bed in the middle of it as an obvious message?

“You’re here…”

The voice that came from behind me wasn’t Adam’s or any one else I recognized.  I whirled around to catch sight of a man wearing violet silk pajama pants, an open robe trimmed in gold revealed a smooth, well formed chest.  He matched the bed, the boudoir must be his, I reasoned.  His dark blonde hair was long, reaching the tops of his shoulders, and he wore a little moustache and goatee that reminded me of one of the more handsome pirates from that movie about the Caribbean.  But I was staring… “I’m here,” I agreed, not quite sure what else to say.

He stared back at me openly, as though feasting on the sight of me.  “I’ve waited for you far too long, but it was well worth the wait,” he smiled, walking around me in a slow circle.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t know I was on the clock.”

He laughed, the sound oddly engaging, and I found myself smiling back before I remembered I had no idea who he was and what I was doing there.  “It is of no moment.  I would gladly wait a hundred years more… but I’m delighted you’re here now,” he added quickly, a momentary flare of panic sweeping across his brow as though maybe his words might give me permission to leave.

“Where is here exactly?”

“Come, have some wine.” He ignored my question, moving past me to fill the goblets and I took the opportunity to take a few steps away from the bed.

“That’s okay, I’m not thirsty,” I replied warily.  “You have me at a disadvantage.  You seem to know exactly who I am, but I have no idea who you are.”

He looked up with a glorious smile, “I am your destiny.”

“I’m outta here.” I turned to leave and strong arms encircled my waist from behind, holding me fast.  “Let me go…”

“There’s no reason to leave, my love, you only just arrived.” His voice sounded soft and soothing at my ear, but I was too panicked about being held tight to be calmed.

“I’m not your love, and unless you never want to use that bed again for anything other than sleeping, you’d better let me go right now,” I bluffed, fully knowing he was much stronger than I was.  Laughter met my ears as he loosened his hold, and I shrugged off his arms completely.

“Give it time, one day I will have your love as surely as you have mine.”

“Yeah, and one day I’ll be the Queen of Sheba,” I muttered.  “Now, who the hell are you and where is this place?”  My patience was past its limits.

“Your servant, my Queen,” he bowed low.  “But you may call me Azazael.  We are in the space between waking and dreaming.”

“This is a dream?” My eyes widened, looking around with interest.  That explained the wings that were no longer in sight, and the bed in the middle of nowhere.  The knowledge that none of it was real relaxed me, and I lost some of the edge of fear that had been working itself up to a real panic in my chest.

“Of sorts,” he nodded.

“So you’re Azazael.”  It was more of a statement than a question.  He didn’t look like a demon.  No pointy teeth or black eyes, but now that I thought about it, he didn’t have an aura like regular humans.

“You know of me.”  He seemed pleased, his chest puffing out slightly.  “Then you know our destiny lies together.”  Azazael started towards me again, but I held out a hand, as if that could stop him.

“I know all about you, Buster, and you can hold it right there.  I know exactly what you are, so you can knock it off with the bedroom eyes and all the destiny talk.  Whatever warped idea is rattling around in that demony brain of yours is not gonna happen.  The sooner you accept it and move on, the happier we’ll all be.”

A furrow of confusion appeared on his brow.  “You wound me, my love.  I am no demon.”

“You’re not?” I blinked.  Looking closer, I could see a faint shimmer of an aura around him, barely visible in the sunlight.  The color was the same warm gold of angels, but muted, and it was my turn to stare back in confusion.  “I don’t get it.  Sam said you were a demon.”  At least I thought so.  Had he said demon?  It was hard to remember the exact words spoken, I’d been too bogged down by the threat of imminent danger.  But to be honest, the guy didn’t look all that terrifying.

“No, of course not.” His face lit up with another smile.  “We are the same, you and I.  Each straddling two different worlds, each desperate to break free of the constraints put upon us by the Powers That Be.”  He took another step towards me and I mirrored it with a step backwards.

If he was an angel, he definitely was one of the Fallen.  “I don’t know why you keep talking like you know me, you don’t know anything about me.”

“I know you, Merceline.”  He said my name like a prayer.  “I know you fear you have lost your humanity, you have not,” Azazael replied earnestly, holding me captive with his gaze.  “Don’t let those sanctimonious prigs up there make you think you’re any less than they are when you are clearly so much more.  You wield far more power than they could ever hope to have, the power of creation itself.” He edged closer, his voice mesmerizing.  “Together we will…”

For a moment there he almost had me caught up in the fervor of his speech, but as he kept beating the horse to death it got easier to pull away from those hypnotic eyes.  “For the love of… will you knock it off with all this ‘together’ stuff?”  I shoved against his chest, gratified by his look of utter astonishment.  “Look, I don’t know where you’re getting your ideas from, but I’m not here to be your… destiny, or anything else.  This is a dream, nothing more, so forget it.”

Instead of being deterred, a speculative smile curved his lips.  “If this is only a dream, then what are you frightened of?”

“Who said I’m afraid?”

“If you are not afraid, then why won’t you let me touch you, my love?”  The look behind his eyes spoke of pleasures to be had at that touch, but I was already over my quota for sexy angels, it wasn’t that hard to turn him down.

“Because I’m not yours to touch, I belong to someone else.”

“Ah yes, to Adamiel.” A look of chagrin crossed his features.

“Adamiel…”  My mouth opened to disagree, intending to say I was Ben’s girl, but I thought better of it.  Belonging to a regular human wouldn’t mean anything to him, but Adam might scare him off.  “Oh, so you know him.”

“Indeed I do, we were brothers once.  But where is Adamiel now?  Why don’t you lie dreaming beside him?”

How did he know who I was lying next to?  My eyes narrowed, wondering how he managed to stay so well informed in his imprisoned state.  Deciding it wasn’t important, I changed tacks.  The last thing I wanted to do was get into a discussion with him about how complicated things were between Adam and me.  “What do you really want?  Behind all this fancy talk about destiny and what you think I want.”

“I want to be free.” His eyes blazed with an intensity that made me swallow past a lump of anxiety that rose in my throat.

“And how exactly do I enter into that scenario?”

“I need your love to re-enter the world.”

“My love…”

“Yes, if you accept me I will be reborn.”

“And by accept you, you mean…”

“In every way.”  He sat on the bed and patted the space beside him

“You expect me to have sex with you?  No friggin’ way.”  My voice squeaked to a higher octave.

Azazael looked unperturbed by my protest.  “You will come to love me, it has been foretold.”

“I don’t care if it’s spray painted on the side of the Space Needle, I’m not sleeping with you.”

His brows drew together in puzzlement.  “You refuse me?”

Was he for real?  Did he seriously expect me to just… shades of Adam came back to mind and it occurred to me this guy had probably never been turned down before.  It must be part of the angel allure that didn’t seem to work on me.  “Hell yeah, I refuse you,” I laughed at the look on his face, as though I’d told him there was no Santa Claus.  “Aw, don’t take it so bad, I’m not human anymore, remember?  You can’t expect me to go all swoony because you crook your little finger.  Even Adam didn’t get me to jump in the sack with him on the first day, and trust me, he was hard to resist.”

“And here I thought I was irresistible.”

I looked up as Adam’s voice interrupted from above.   Dark wings unfurled, he glided down with elegant grace, wearing a pair of black jeans and nothing else.  “What are you doing here?” slipped out before I thought better of it.  It was better than the first impulse that came to mind, which was to throw my arms around him before he could disappear again.  But I retained a shred of pride, and remained content to devour him with my eyes.  Finer than any sculpture crafted by the masters, his well muscled form was beautifully framed by the expanse of wings.  Bright blue eyes, the mark of angelic Grace flashed mischievously, his dark hair artfully mussed in a way I was sure was meant to make me think he’d just risen from bed.  Good God, even his bare toes were sexy…

“You called, I came.”

If we had been alone I would have given him an earful at his chosen reply.  How long had I called him without any response?  Technically Azazael had been the first to use his name, but I wasn’t about to argue over what brought Adam to my side.  Instead, I chose to keep a united front with Azazael there.  “Interesting choice of wardrobe.”  Or lack thereof.

“It’s your dream.” A half shrug was given, and I had to wonder, how much of it was real and how much a figment of my imagination?  “Muscling in on my territory, aren’t you, Azazael?”  Adam wrapped an arm around my waist possessively, hauling me up against his side.  Ordinarily I might have objected to the manhandling, but at the time all I could think of was how good he smelled.

“I hardly think she’s yours any longer, Adamiel, your absence has made that quite clear.”  He had a point, but I kept my mouth shut.  “You allow that mouth breather to share her love, why not your own brother?”

“You’re not my brother,” Adam growled, even as I objected.

“Ben’s not a mouth breather!”

“Be that as it may, you can hardly expect me to pass up such a delight, especially when the key to my freedom lies within such an attractive package.  Give over this enmity, Adamiel, there will be enough left of her for you to share when I am through.”

“I should kill you.”

“Hey!” I pressed against Adam’s chest as he bristled, his face dark and thunderous, the shining, silver sword appearing in his hand with a metallic snick.

“You should be thanking me,” Azazael scoffed, unperturbed by the sight of Adam’s sword.

“Thanking you… I should never have listened to you.”

“Oh yes, it’s all my fault.  It’s always my fault isn’t it?”  A wave of anger came off of Azazael in almost palpable waves, the first sign of real emotion I’d seen from him.  “Nevermind that I’m paying for your sins on top of my own.”

“Am I missing something?”  I watched the exchange between the two, feeling oblivious to half of the conversation, but Adam continued as if he hadn’t heard me.

“Your own sins are enough to keep you exactly where you belong.”

“Until I find my release between your lady’s silken thighs.”  A mocking smile appeared on Azazael’s lips and I felt Adam surge forward.  It took every bit of strength I possessed to keep him from leaping for his throat.

“Nobody’s getting between my thighs, okay?  You can relax, he’s just trying to get a rise out of you.  If I won’t give him the satisfaction, neither should you.”  I thought for a moment Adam might really try to kill him, but after a few tense seconds, Adam tore his gaze from the other man, giving me his usual smirk.

“Nobody?”

“We can talk about that later,” I muttered. “Now put the sword away before somebody gets hurt.”  In the blink of an eye the sword disappeared.  “One of these days you’re gonna have to teach me how to do that…”

“I’m more interested in that talk about your thighs,” Adam quipped, and I couldn’t help but smile at being on familiar ground again.

“I’m for a return to that topic as well,” Azazael chimed in with a cheery grin, not at all deterred by Adam’s display of anger.

“This is the last glimpse you get of me and my thighs, do you get me?” I scowled at him, but Azazael only waggled his eyebrows at me, playfully.

“I intend to.”

“Okay, playtime’s over.  Azazael, it’s been a real blast, let’s do it again in another three thousand years, shall we?” Adam smirked, his arm wrapping tightly around me again.  “Say goodbye, sweetcheeks.  This is where we leave the traitor behind, and go home.”  There wasn’t time to offer so much as a word though, as Adam launched us up into the sky, his wings stirring the air around us.  Not to be outdone, I extended the white wings that brought me there in the first place with only a moment’s thought, not too worried about the mechanics of managing it with his arm holding me so close.  Reality wasn’t exactly the cornerstone of the dream experience.

Part of me hated how easily I went into his arms.  After weeks of his being gone and getting on with my life, after fighting so hard to keep things as normal as possible and with Ben being such an important part of my life, you’d think I would be immune to his presence.  But in that moment all I could think about was how right it felt to be with him again, how soothing the steady beat of his heart was against my ear, and how it was gonna hurt like hell when he left again.

When I pulled back enough to look up at him, I found Adam staring down at me, an inscrutable expression on his face, as though he was trying to come to a decision about something.  “Mercy…”  I felt more than heard my name on his lips, and I strained to hear what he had to say next.  “White?  Really?”  He plucked a feather from the white wings that folded protectively around me.  “Don’t you think that’s a little pure for you?”

I don’t know what I expected.  An apology for staying away?  Tender words of love?  How much he missed me?  The reality brought a scowl to my face.  “That’s all you have to say to me after all this time?  Adam, where have you been?”

“Around.”

“Not around me,” I muttered, and his face softened, reaching up to brush my cheek with the pad of his thumb.

“No, not around you.”

“You’re not coming back with me, are you?”

“I’ll take you home and then you’re on your own.”

“You’re leaving again.”  It was more of a statement than a question.

“You don’t seriously expect me to stick around and watch you with Barney Miller, do you?” he scoffed.

“Who?”

“You’re kidding me, you don’t know who… forget it, it’s not important,” he shook his head.

He meant Ben and my eyes narrowed.  “We’ve had this conversation before.  Ben knows all about what I am now, and guess what?”

“He wants you to help him catch bad guys.”

“No.”  I hadn’t mentioned the ability to read auras to him, it hadn’t come up yet.  “He handled it fine.  He still wants to take care of me.”

“Of course he does, he’s not a complete moron.”

“He’s not…”  I mashed my lips together to keep from arguing.  “How come you didn’t want me to know about him?  About Azazael?”

Adam had the decency to duck his head guiltily at the question.  “I was hoping he wouldn’t find a way to get to you in the real world, and then you wouldn’t have to worry about it, but I forgot about this place.  It was lazy of me, but now you know, right?  Any time you see him popping into your dreams, you run the other way and you’ll be good.”

I had more to say on the subject, but I didn’t want to argue, not when it felt like he would be leaving again so soon.  “Was any of this real?”

“About as real as it gets for you and me.” He stroked my cheek and I leaned into the touch like a cat seeking attention from its master.  I had to stop doing that, I had to break the hold he had over me, but I had no idea how to go about it.

“But you won’t come to see me in the real world.”

“You know I can’t.” His face hardened.

“I know you think I’ll end up hurt because of you, but…”

“But nothing, end of discussion, Mercy.  Now, unless you’re willing to return to the conversation about your thighs, I don’t have anything left to say.”

He was pushing me away on purpose, but I wasn’t sure what to do about it.  While I was still trying to come up with a good response, the scenery blurred and shifted around us, and we stood in the living room of my apartment.  Immediately Mimsy bound over to rub against Adam’s ankles.

“I’ll see you around, kid.”

“Yeah, whatever…”  I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of watching me moon over him while he floated away or disappeared or whatever it was he had planned for his grand exit, but his voice called me back.

“Merceline…” I turned around, expecting him to give me a goodbye kiss, but instead he laid his hand over my heart.  A warm golden light spilled from his hand as he gathered the Grace, suffusing my body with a tingling warmth as it spread over me.   All at once I knew what he was doing, and what it would cost him.

Adam was giving me some of his Grace.

I opened my mouth to protest, but the breath left my body in a rush as the full force of his power hit me.  When Sam had given me the Grace I’d been lying in the hospital dying, the pain was the only thing I was conscious of and barely at that, so nothing prepared me for the way it felt to share in Adam’s energy.  In that moment I knew the full breadth and depth of his feelings for me, and no amount of snarky little quips or stupid jokes could lessen it.  I was as sure of his love as I was the sun would rise in the morning.  And I was sure he was leaving me again.

I woke up in my bed, feeling bathed in the light of that love, a soft glow emanating from my body.  I could still feel him all around me like a warm embrace, but little by little it started to fade.  “Adamiel…” I whispered, turning my head towards the window, fat tears staining my pillow.  How the hell was I supposed to let him go now?

Chapter Three

I was slow moving the next morning as I got up to make coffee and breakfast for Ben before he had to get to work.  The telltale glow was gone from my skin, but I could still feel Adam’s presence, like a comforting hug.  Or was that wishful thinking?  If I stopped to concentrate on it, I could feel him out there somewhere, far away.  It was enough to convince me the ‘dream’ from the night before with Azazael had been real enough in its own way that what I’d learned was probably true.  He wanted to use me to gain his freedom, just as Sam warned, and the key to that freedom was sex with me.

As disturbing as that was, I was relieved in a way, because I knew what to expect.  Like Adam said, if I saw the guy coming all I had to do was run the opposite direction and I’d be safe.  Unless… unless all that talk about love had been garbage and he could force me at any time.  Remembering the feel of his strong arms around me, I didn’t want to get close enough to him to find out.

In the bathroom I could hear Ben up and around, getting ready for the day while I popped the bagels into the toaster, and I decided to call Daphne to see if she wanted to meet for lunch later.  We were way overdue for a little girl talk about the whole thing.  Luck wasn’t with me though, and I left her a voicemail, asking her to call me when she woke up.  It was still too early to call my brother Matty, especially after a party the night before, and I debated whether or not to bring him into any of it at all.  His reaction to my angelic abilities had been disappointing to say the least, but I was mostly over my frustration in him.  Mostly.

“Coffee, great,” Ben smiled, going right for the mug.  “I can’t stay for breakfast, I got a call.”

“But the bagel will only take like two minutes and it’ll be ready to go,” I protested, the container of cream cheese already halfway open in my hands.

“I know, but I’m already running late. I had to use your razor by the way.  I should keep a few more things here if you’re not going to come and stay with me.”

That sounded dangerously close to him moving in with me, but before I could jump into that pool, he set down the coffee mug and headed for the door.  “You’re going to be alright here alone today, right?”

“Yes, I’ll be fine.  I’ll probably meet up with Daphne later and I’ll be sure to be home before dark.” I gave him a little mock salute.

“You’d better, or I’ll stick a protection detail on you,” he returned playfully.  At least I hoped he was being playful.  I was still mulling that one over when he pulled the door shut behind him, leaving me with two bagels and an opportunistic cat.

I slid the extra plate across the breakfast bar to where Mimsy watched me with interest.  “You want some coffee too?”

* * *

Not in the mood to take care of household chores beyond the breakfast dishes, I puttered around the apartment feeling… trapped.  The funny thing is, I probably would have hung around the house on a regular morning anyway, but knowing there was danger lurking out there somewhere was enough to make me itch to get outside.  So, I went to the one place I thought I might go and not have to look over my shoulder the entire time.

Sam’s apartment.

After such a long time I wasn’t sure he’d still be there.  The last time I’d stopped by a few weeks before, the apartment had been unlocked as usual and his bookshelves still overflowed their capacity, but there had been no sign of the man himself.  Just like he hadn’t returned my calls, both cellphone and otherwise.  I figured there was at least a fifty-fifty chance he might be there since he’d broken the rules by coming to see me the night before.   Finding the right door, I knocked and waited patiently.  Unconsciously holding my breath, I let it out in a long sigh of relief when he pulled the door open seconds later, his sunny smile a soothing balm to my overwrought nerves.

“Mercy, you’re a sight for sore eyes.”

I had to smile over the turn of phrase, his vocabulary was expanding.  “You saw me last night.”

“Yes, but not for very long.  I missed you more than a fat kid misses cake.”

“What have you been watching on TV?” I narrowed my eyes at him.  It was nice to see him trying to integrate more into society, but it was jarring to hear such a thing from his mouth.  On the outside Sam looked like a regular guy, if for you a regular guy meant drop dead gorgeous.  Sam was light in every way Adam was dark from his innocent, sunny smile to his golden blonde hair which still sported the modern faux-hawk style I’d cut for him months ago.  The only physical feature they shared were the trademark blue eyes that marked him an angel, but what cemented their friendship were the circumstances under which they’d both Fallen.

“How did you know I’ve been watching the television?” he blinked.

“Lucky guess,” I hid a smile as I strode past him into the apartment.  To my surprise, in addition to the bare furnishings I remembered, there was also an eclectic mix of artwork on the walls and a planter box of flowers by the window.  “You’ve been busy decorating, I see.”

“I have taken an interest in my surroundings of late,” he nodded, shutting the door behind us.  “Do you like it?”

I nodded quickly and was rewarded by his instant smile.  “I wasn’t sure you’d still be here, you were never around when I came looking for you before.”  The artwork he’d chosen were prints of the masters. Monet, Van Gogh and others I couldn’t name off the top of my head.  Coupled with the plethora of books, it almost felt like I was in a library.

“I know, I hid from you before.”  At least Sam had the grace to look guilty over it.

My mouth opened to chide him for it, but at catching his expression, I decided to let it go.  “It’s alright, Sam, I forgive you.  You were only following orders, right?”  Orders from a certain fallen angel I was not gonna start thinking about again…

Relieved, Sam found his smile again, before his head canted to one side, studying me closer than I liked.  “You look different.”

“Do I?”  Was it noticeable?  I did feel a little different, but when I checked in the mirror I looked the same as always to me.  Not wanting to tell him what Adam had done in giving me some of his Grace, I decided to play dumb.  It was a safe bet it would be frowned upon, and the less people that knew about it, the better.  “Tell me more about who Azazael is.”  I changed the subject and luckily he didn’t miss a beat, pulling down a big, yellowed book from his shelves to read aloud.

“Azazael, the Fallen One.  And Azazael taught men to make swords and knives and shields and breastplates; and made known to them the metals of the earth and the art of working them; and bracelets and ornaments; and the use of antimony and the beautifying of the eyelids; and all kinds of costly stones and all coloring tinctures. And there arose much godlessness, and they committed fornication, and they were led astray and became corrupt in all their ways.”

“So, he was a bad guy back in the day, but what happened that ended up with him imprisoned for thousands of years?”  Giving weapons and make-up to humans didn’t sound like enough to damn someone for all eternity.

Sam continued to read aloud. “And God saw the sin brought about by Azazael and bade Raphael to bind Azazael hand and foot and cast him into the darkness: and make an opening in the desert — which is in Dudael — and cast him therein.  And place upon him rough and jagged rocks, and cover him with darkness, and let him abide there forever, and cover his face that he may not see light.”  Turning the book around for me to see, the drawing on the page showed a pitiful looking figure, chained to a huge stone, cowering beneath a shower of rocks and debris that was about to hit him.

“Wow, harsh,” I murmured.  Talk about a steep punishment.

“He was set as an example to all of us, that we might know God’s wrath were we to follow in his ways.”  There was no trace of Sam’s newfound colloquialism after reading from the book, he was just as formal as he used to be.

“Yeah, but to be trapped under a pile of rubble, away from the sunlight, for all eternity?  You’ve gotta admit, that’s kinda cruel.”  Not that I was rooting for the guy, but it didn’t sound like he’d been cutting a bloody swath through humanity like I’d pictured from Sam’s warning.  It sounded like an unbalanced penalty for the crime.

Sam gave the barest shrug of shoulders.  “Such is the will of God.”

“I’m not sure about that being trapped away from sunlight though, it was sunny and beautiful where I saw him last night.”

That caught his attention and he gripped my shoulders tightly.  “You saw Azazael last night?  Where?”

“He came to me in a dream.  Well, not a dream exactly.  He said it was in the space between the real world and dreams, or something like that.”

“Mercy, you must be very careful of his influence in such a place.  What happens there can easily shape reality if given enough power.  The more attention you give him, the stronger he’ll become.”  Sam let go of me to pace back and forth across the living room.  “If he is already reaching out to you from there, he must be stronger than we thought.”

“Why does Adam dislike him so much?  I kinda got the impression it was more than because Azazael is after me now.”  Of course Adam didn’t seem to get along with many people besides Sam.  Hell, half the time I wanted to smack him in the mouth myself.  But the other half…

“You saw Adam as well?” he blinked.

“Yes, he showed up in the middle of the dream, and he wasn’t at all friendly to the guy, not even for him.  In fact, he did that thing with the sword appearing as if from nowhere.  Can you do that too?”

“Yes, of course.”

“Can you show me how to do it?”

Sam looked vaguely disturbed by the notion and tried to redirect me.  “Adam came to you in the Ether… Of course, that makes perfect sense.”

“What makes perfect sense?”

“It’s the one place it’s safe to come to you without attracting the attention of the Watchers.”

“The Watchers?”  I started to feel like a parrot, but I wasn’t tracking what he was going on about just yet.

“Yes, those angels set to watch you from above, chiefly Nathanael.  He said as much when last I paid him a visit.  It is their notice that Adam hopes to avoid, for fear of dooming you to the same fate as his beloved Mariah.”

“His wife,” I swallowed, remembering how she’d met her end.  “But wait, go back a minute.  You didn’t explain why Adam hates Azazael so much.”

“He blames him in part for his fall.  It was Azazael who first took up the notion to involve himself with humans, teaching them to arm themselves and choosing a human woman for his own.  It was his example that led many of my brethren to take human wives, thus incurring God’s wrath.”

“That’s the part I don’t get.  What’s so bad about angels falling in love with humans?”  Shouldn’t God have a soft spot in his heart for love?

“It was not always or even often borne out of love, Mercy,” Sam shook his head sadly.  “Most of the Fallen were more interested in debauchery than love, and the sins of the flesh corrupted them.  Many angels were worshipped as deities and began to believe themselves worthy of that obeisance.  For that they were cast out of heaven, and for that Azazael was made to pay the ultimate price.  That is why he will stop at nothing to gain his freedom through you.”

“What makes him think he can escape through me anyway?  What was that stuff about me being the vessel?”  I had to admit, some of it went right over my head.

“There is a prophecy that speaks of a way for him to escape his prison and be reborn to the world through the vessel. He believes that is you.”

“But why me?”

“Here, let me read it to you.”  Sam put back the first book and selected another, a much newer volume.  “And in the time of the new world there shall be a creature born of Grace, and she shall be the Bringer of Life.  She will walk among the Earth and the Heavens alike, sewing dissent among God’s chosen.  From her issue will arise a new race of man, free from Original Sin.”

“That doesn’t sound so bad, except for the dissent part.”  It was weird to think there was a prophecy written about me, if that was me after all, it was a little vague.

“There is another passage.” He flipped to a later page.  “There will the fallen scapegrace conspire to be free, corrupting all with his touch.  And the Bringer of Life shall be the vessel through which he will be reborn to the world.  With deceit he shall conjure her love to break the chains that bind him.  And man will know new suffering and despair under his hand. Let the heavens weep.”

Heavy stuff.  “Okay. But as long as I head in the other direction as soon as I see him I’m safe, right?  It says he needs my love to break free.  I won’t give it to him, that’s all.”

“That is true, but Azazael has ever been a master of finding others to do his bidding.”

“Meaning?”

“Meaning he can take any form to steal your love.”

“You mean like a shape shifter?” I blinked, confused.

“He has certain dark magics available to him.  More likely he would use the ability to possess another to reach you in this world if you will not submit to him in the Ether.”

“Then he could get me here at any time?”  I remembered how strong he was…  “Will my Grace work against him like it did on Weatie?”  The Grace protected me when I was afraid, but it had no effect whatsoever on demons.  In fact, they thought it was delicious.  But Azazael wasn’t a demon.

“Your Grace would protect you to some extent if used against him, yes.  But he would never seek to force you.  Your love must be freely given.  That is why he could easily appear as someone you love and trust in order to breach your defenses.”

“Swell.” I dropped into one of his armchairs as the magnitude of what he’d told me sank in.  “So, what you’re saying is, he could appear as Ben and seduce me in my own bedroom, and I’d be giving him exactly what he wants?”

Sam hesitated, clearly uncomfortable with that thought before nodding.  “Bingo.”

I wasn’t as charmed that time by the vernacular.  “Super.  Just great,” I replied sourly.  “Well, that’s fine. I’ll never have sex ever again, end of story.”  Sam’s awkward pat on my shoulder did little to ease my mind, and neither did what came next.

“Also…”

“Wait, there’s more?”

“I wasn’t going to trouble you with this last night, but under the circumstances…”

“Go ahead and spill it,” I waved him on.  Things couldn’t possibly get any worse.

“I have learned that the demon lord has sent runners up into the world to retrieve you.”

I was wrong.  They were definitely worse.  “To retrieve me?”

Sam nodded. “Word has reached him of your Grace, and he seeks to make you a member of his court.”

“And you didn’t think this was information I should know?”  I couldn’t help but raise my voice, and I stopped to count to ten on the inside before I blew my stack.  Adam hadn’t mentioned any of it the night before either, and he must have known.

“I knew I could protect you from his imps, they are no match for an angel.”  His chest puffed out a little.

“God save me from the male ego…” My eyes closed in an impotent appeal.  “Alright, well, let’s hear it all now.  Who is this demon lord, and what exactly does he expect me to do in his court?”

“I should think he will want the same as all his ilk,” he shrugged.

“Which is…”  It was like pulling teeth to get the information out of him sometimes.

“To feed from you, of course.”

“Of course…”  Adam’s words came back to me from the night I’d been attacked on the church steps.  I’d all but forgotten his warning that Cephas’ boss might want a taste of me, since nothing had come out of the woodwork in the weeks that followed.  “You mentioned something about him sending runners after me.  What does that mean?”

“Raum will need to find you first.  You were not attacked near the vicinity of your home, is that correct?”

“Yeah, that’s right,” I nodded.  The church wasn’t too far from work though, it would only be a matter of time before they caught up with me.  “What can I do to avoid them?”  For all I knew there was an army of imps out there, each armed with my picture and a bloodhound.  Did demons need search dogs?  Or could they sniff out my Grace themselves?

“Their province lies in the darkness.  You should be safe enough in the daylight hours, but you should not go out alone at night to begin with.”

Easier said than done.  “I work in a bar.  How am I supposed to avoid going out at night?”  Sam had no easy answer for me, and I frowned in the face of his unhelpful lack of knowledge.  “But you’ll be looking out for me, right?  Or am I on my own?”

“I will watch over you as best I can, as I have been these many months.”

“Yeah, from afar.” My frown stayed fixed in place.  “I don’t see why you can’t be around me openly anymore.”

“Adam has said…”

“You know, Adam doesn’t get to call all of the shots.  If he’s gonna run out on me, then he doesn’t get to say what happens in my life.” I swallowed back a lump of emotion as his last goodbye came rushing back, and it was a few moments before I could speak again.  “If I’m in this much danger, from both Azazael and the demon guy, I’m gonna need all the help I can get.  I mean, who do you think you’re fooling?”  Sam looked dubious and I pressed him with my trump card.  “Unless you don’t want to be friends anymore…”

“No, that wasn’t my intention… We are BFF’s, are we not?”  His face twisted in pain at the notion that I didn’t think so too, and I felt bad for even bringing it up.

“Yeah, we’re friends, and we always will be.”  I covered his hand with mine, giving it a squeeze.  The connection between us was strong.  Not just because he’d given me part of his Grace and saved my life, or because we genuinely liked each other, but because we needed each other.  He needed me as a bridge to the current century and I needed him as a bridge to the unknown.  “So, what do you say?  No more hide and seek?”

Sam’s answering smile was radiant.  “No more hide and seek,” he agreed.  “Does that mean I can come and visit you sometime?”

“Yes, of course you can.  Just call first, to make sure I’m there and I don’t already have company.”  Even though Ben knew all about Sam and what he was, I didn’t think it would be the best idea ever to bring the two of them together yet, given Ben’s prejudice against him.

“I remember, no popping in unannounced,” Sam nodded.  “Oh, I got a new movie.  Will you watch it with me?  It’s a timeless Disney classic.” He parroted off the description from the DVD box, and I realized he wanted me to watch Mary Poppins with him.

“Sure, I love that movie,” I smiled, losing some of my worry.

“You’ve seen it before?” He blinked, and I had to laugh.

“Everyone has seen it before.  But I’m up for seeing it again, it’s a good one.  Too bad we don’t have any popcorn.”

“Why, are you hungry?”

“You don’t have to be hungry to eat popcorn.”  In the face of his confusion, I let it go, relaxing in one of the two easy chairs in his living room while he fired up the DVD player.  It had been a long time since I’d seen it, but soon I was singing along with the children and the penguins, the whole shebang.  Even Sam got into it, toes tapping as he hummed along, catching on to the words pretty quickly.  It was better than watching it with a kid for the first time, and I realized how much I’d missed his company those past few weeks. I’d missed the easy joy that shone from his face over the simplest of things.

“If you liked this one, I have a whole slew of musicals to show you,” I grinned, happy to find someone to share one of my favorite pastimes with.  Matty had never been big on musicals and Daphne watched them with me every now and again, but she never got into them as much as I did.

“I would like that very much.  Shall we go now?”

I hated to crush the look on his face. “I was thinking about some time soon, but not quite that soon.  I’ve actually been here a lot longer than I first planned. I’m going to meet up with Daphne for lunch.  I’d invite you but…”

“I don’t eat,” he nodded.

“I still think you’re making a big mistake on that score.”  I rose to my feet to get going.  “Maybe you can try some popcorn when you come over to hang out at my place.”

“It’s a date,” he smiled, and I couldn’t help but wonder if he was trying out a modern phrase or if he did really mean a date.

“So, I’ll see you tonight then, when all the big bads come out to get me?”

“I’ll be there with bells on,” he promised, and I gave him a quick hug.

“It’s good to see you again, Sam.”

* * *

Daphne’s text said she’d be available to meet for lunch at our usual spot. I decided it was late enough to risk a phone call with my brother and not get my head bitten off for waking him up.  At least, I thought so… When his voice came on the line, he sounded like he’d been dead asleep.

“H’lo…?”

“Hey, Matt, did I wake you?”

“No, been up for hours,” he yawned, and I could picture him all bleary eyed.  “What’s up?”

“I thought maybe we should talk.”

“‘Bout what?”

“It’s not the sort of thing to talk about over the phone,” I hedged.

“Oh, come on, Merce, what’s with the need for all this cloak and dagger bullshit?  Tell me what’s up so I can get back to bed.”

Not exactly the reaction I’d been hoping for.  “I thought you might be wondering why I left the party so early, especially after Sam showed up, that’s all.”

“Sam,” he replied blankly. “I thought the cop’s name was Ben?”

Why did I bother?  “It is, I’m talking about Sam, the angel.  Remember the whole angel thing?  Nevermind, Matty…”

“Wait, I thought you were done with that angel stuff?”  He sounded more awake, and I wondered if he was trying to figure out how to make a bit of money off the situation.  Wanting to nip that in the bud, I decided to be a little more blunt.

“Yeah well, they aren’t done with me.  Apparently, there’s a dangerous fallen angel who’s trying to be reborn into this world through me, and he can use magic to appear like anyone he wants.  So, be careful out there.  He might decide to use you to come after me.”

“For reals, a shapeshifter?”  There was definitely a note of excitement to his voice and I started to regret calling him at all.

“Yes, a dangerous one.  So, if you see anything out of the ordinary, try and be safe, okay?  This isn’t a good guy to mess around with, he’s not like the others.”

“Yeah, sure.  I’ll be on the lookout then.”

“Good, that’s all I wanted to tell you.”

“You sound kinda freaked out though.”

“Wouldn’t you be if someone wanted to trick you into sleeping with them to escape being imprisoned for thousands of years?”

“There are worse ways to go, Merce,” he laughed.  I swear, sometimes my brother acted like he was still twelve.  “Just keep your knees together and you’ll be fine.”  A woman’s laughter came through the phone, high and grating.

“Is there someone else there with you?”

“Yeah, why?”

“Remember this is just between us, right?  No one else can know anything about it.”  I wasn’t sure he was listening though, because I heard him talking to her in the background.  “Matt!”

“Right, yeah, of course,” he replied all too quickly and I was pretty sure he hadn’t heard a word I’d said.  My only saving grace was if he ever did say anything about my… situation, no one would ever believe him.

“I’ll let you get back to it then.”

“Later, Merce.”

I’d done my part in trying to warn Matty about the dangers headed my way.  More than likely it wouldn’t affect him in the slightest, but I felt better about giving him the heads up.  After the way that phone call went, I wasn’t sure if I should bother Daphne with my troubles.  Maybe I was making a mountain out of a molehill?  With both Sam and Ben looking out for me in the real world and Adam protecting me in the Ether, what could go wrong?

Oh, how I wish I’d never tempted fate with that question…

Chapter Four

Daphne took the worry out of having to decide whether or not to fill her in by demanding I tell her all the juicy details from the moment I stepped into her apartment.  I have to admit it felt good to have someone to talk to who wouldn’t try and pressure me into going to live with him, judge me for letting Adam get to me when I had Ben in my back pocket or push me to find a way to make a little bit of money off of my ordeal.

Her apartment was even smaller than mine, more of a studio, with a curtain closing off the bedroom.  The apartment was decorated in flea market and second hand store cast offs, in a jumble of different styles.  The result of Daphne’s tendency to impulse buy.  That meant when I took a seat on the loveseat that served as a couch, I fought for space with a soft, leopard print throw blanket and a Hello Kitty pillow.

“What happened to you guys?  The party barely started and you slipped off together.  Wanted a little bit of romantic alone time?”  Daphne’s eyes were bright and ready for gossip, and I did my best to return her smile.

“No, Sam showing up was a bit of a buzzkill.”

“Oh, right, I almost forgot about that.  Did you tell Ben about it all?”

“Yep,” I sighed, hugging the pillow to my middle.

“How did he take it?”  She sat beside me, leaning forward expectantly.

“Pretty well I guess, all things considered.” I waved my hand back and forth.  “He didn’t believe me until I proved it to him though.”  I launched into a description of my trick with the knife and I noticed a wistful look come over her face.  Though I’d healed her minor aches and pains plenty of times, I could tell she wished she’d gotten to see something a bit more dramatic like healing a cut before her eyes.  Well, she could be wistful all she wanted, I wasn’t about to cut into my arm to satisfy her curiosity.

“See, I told you, you had nothing to worry about!  You should have told him a long time ago.  Don’t you feel better getting it off your chest?  Maybe you’ll finally let him in all the way without having to keep so many secrets from him.”  Her observation that I hadn’t completely let myself fall for Ben caught me by surprise, and she pressed on as she noticed it.  “You know you’ve been holding back with him, Mercy, admit it.  Normally you’re the type to jump first without making sure there’s water beneath you.”

It was true, I did tend to jump into relationships before I had all the facts.  Not that I’m a slut or anything.  I meant in the sense that I had a history of risking my heart (not my body) without thinking about the consequences.  “That’s not what’s been holding me back with Ben,” I admitted aloud.

“Then what… oh, Mercy, I recognize that look,” she sighed as realization dawned on her.  “Not the stuff with Adam again?  I thought you finally had him out of your system?”

“So did I.”  But even before he gifted me with his Grace I’d felt the same pull towards him.  And the connection had grown even stronger.

Daphne’s eyes narrowed.  “What else happened last night?”

For the next fifteen minutes I talked nonstop, filling her in on everything Sam told me in the club and at his place, the ‘dream’ in the Ether, and, after a moment’s hesitation, what Adam shared with me before we parted.

“Wow.” She blinked, leaning back against the couch.  “You don’t mess around, huh?  When you step into trouble you really go for it.”

“I didn’t step into anything,” I protested. “I was minding my own business, trying to make a life with Ben, remember?”

“Sorry.”  She fell silent for a few seconds.  “So, what’s the plan?”

“Plan?”  I looked back at her in surprise.  “I’m still reeling from all of this, I have no plan.”

“Come on, Mercy, without a plan there’s no attack.  Or defense, as the case may be…  The demons can’t get you unless it’s night time and Sam’s got protection duty covered, that leaves Azazael.  Maybe we should try to find out more about him?  The more you know about him the easier it’ll be to spot him when he tries to pull something, right?”

That was one of the reasons why Daphne was my very best friend.  I could always count on her to give me a swift kick in the pants when I wallowed in despair, and I’d do the same for her in a heartbeat.  “You’re right.  It’s time to stop worrying about what’s gonna come out after me and think about what I can do to stop this guy.  So, what do you suggest?”

“Me?  Oh, well, let’s see…” Daphne’s eyes roamed around the room, looking for inspiration.  “The internet!” She all but shouted in triumph, talking quickly when she saw my eyes start to roll.  “No, really.  It’s not all crap, there’s a lot of useful information on the web.”

“I know, but what are the chances I’ll find something real about Azazael that Sam and Adam don’t already know?”

“Yes, but what you get from them is through the filter of their experience, and unless you know the right questions to ask, you don’t know what you’re missing.”

She had a point.  “Alright, let’s check it out.”  Following her to the computer tucked away in the corner of the room, we typed in his name, spending the better part of an hour looking into all the links.  In addition to finding similar passages to what Sam read to me from his book, I also learned that Azazael was generally credited with the fall of mankind leading to the floods in Noah’s time.  Just about every sin committed by man was attributed to his influence.  Curiously enough, he was also the original source of the word scapegoat.  It made me wonder if some of what we’d found was just bad press?  After all, the bible was written by men; who better to hold responsible for their sins but a fallen angel?  It was far easier to place the blame somewhere else than on themselves.  Not that I started to feel all warm and fuzzy about the guy, but it did give me more to think about.  Still, it was hard to get over the countless stories of his debauchery and excess, there wasn’t a single redeeming quality attached to his name.

“None of that looks good,” I frowned, sitting back after my eyes started to burn from reading over her shoulder.

“It also says he’s trapped.  I don’t think he can actually hurt you in that - what did you call it?  Ether.”

“According to Sam, he can possess someone here and I might not even know it.  I don’t know if I would see his aura projected on the person, or anything to clue me in to the fact that it’s him.”

“Maybe you should ask Sam about that?”

“Yeah, I’ll have to bring it up tonight when he’s on guard duty.”

“At least Sam’s not hiding out from you anymore.”

“Yep, brownie points for Sam.  For once he decided to disregard what Adam told him to do.”

“I’m still a little foggy on why Adam didn’t want you to know about any of this.”

“Who knows what the hell goes through that head of his…” I muttered darkly.

“But you know he cares about you.”

“Yeah.” A long sigh left my lips as I laid my hand over my heart.  “He does.  He just has a funny way of showing it.”

“You make it sound like when we were in the third grade and Rupert Miller put those worms in your lunchbox, remember that?” she laughed, and I couldn’t help but smile.

“Yeah, only instead of worms, he actually gave me a piece of himself.”

“I can’t even get a guy to spring for flowers.” Daphne gave a disgruntled sigh, and I hid a smile behind my hand.

“What about that guy you were with at the party, Jake?  He seemed pretty into you.”

“It’s going pretty well, but it’s new.  You know how that goes.” She shrugged and I nodded in commiseration.  “What’s it like, having Adam’s Grace?  Does it feel different from Sam’s?”

I thought about it a good while before I answered, trying to find the words for what it felt like.  “It’s like… like I can feel him out there, far away, but still close.  I know that doesn’t make a whole lot of sense,” I added at seeing her confusion.  “It’s like I can feel a piece of him here with me, close to my heart.  It’s comforting, but at the same time, I can tell he’s not anywhere near by and it feels like he’ll never come back.”  I swallowed back a wave of dismay at that last realization.  Somewhere in the back of my mind I realized I always thought I’d see Adam again.  But was giving me part of his Grace his final goodbye?  I wasn’t sure.

“Well, you look different at any rate.”

Sam had said something similar.  “What do you mean, different?”

“I don’t know… like someone turned a light on inside of you.  You’re practically glowing with good health.  Even with the pouty, scared thing you have going on, it looks good on you.”

“Yeah, well, you try dealing with a bunch of bad guys after you at once and see how pouty and scared you look,” I grumbled.

“I know, I know.  But do you think you can spare a little?  I think my complexion could use a little dose of Grace.”

There was no way I was gonna start down that path.  “Daph, you know I can’t…”

“I’m kidding,” she giggled. “Oh man, you should have seen the look on your face!”

“I can imagine,” I murmured sourly, not finding it quite as funny.  “I think I’ve done about as much sleuthing as I can for one afternoon.  I’d better get going on some errands before it gets dark and I have to worry about demons too.”

“Do you want some company?”

Her offer caught me by surprise.  “Are you sure you want to be out in public with me?  I’ve got a lot of people after me.”

“Of course.  We still have plenty of hours of daylight.  And if this guy Azazael comes after you, I’ve got your back.”

“If Azazael comes after me, I want you to run for the hills, okay?”

“Why?  He’s not after me.”

“Because he’s dangerous.  Promise me, Daphne, at the first sign of trouble I want you out of there.”  From the look on her face I could tell I was gonna have a hard time getting that promise out of her and I could understand why.  If she was in trouble it’d be hard for me to turn my back on her and run too.  But the last thing I needed on my conscience was anything happening to my best friend because she wanted to spend time with me.  If it came down to it, I’d avoid her like the plague to keep from involving her in any of it.

“I promise I’ll go for help at the first sign of danger,” she relented finally.  It wasn’t quite the same thing, but I recognized it might be the best I’d get from her for the moment.  “Now, you said something about errands.  Does that mean shopping?”

* * *

It was hard to enjoy the afternoon when I looked over my shoulder at every turn.  In the end, I’m afraid I wasn’t very good company, but Daphne didn’t make any bones about it.  At the end of the afternoon I had my favorite dress back from the dry cleaners, bought stamps, and dropped off my overdue library books.  I even found a new collar for Mimsy with a tiny little bell on it, designed to drive her absolutely insane.  Daphne refused to leave my side until it was time to meet Ben for dinner at La Hacienda, our favorite Mexican restaurant.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to stay and wait with you?” she asked when we got to the restaurant parking lot.

“Not unless you’re going to join us for dinner.”  It didn’t make much sense to me for her to stick around to hand me off to Ben’s care.

“No, I can’t. I’ve got plans with Jake.”

“Then what are you sticking around here for?  You’d better go get ready.  Maybe he’ll bring you flowers tonight,” I grinned.  At seeing her look towards the darkening sky, I added quickly.  “There’s still at least an hour before it’s full dark, I’m sure it’ll be fine.  I’ll be waiting in a public place.”

“Are you sure you’ll be alright?”

I bit back the response that leapt to my lips.  Namely, what did she think she was going to do against a demon if she was with me?  “Yeah, I’ll be fine, really.  You go on ahead, have a great time and call me tomorrow, I want details.”

“Okay, see you later, Mercy.”

I hopped out of her car, waving as I watched her drive away.  The restaurant entrance was less than thirty feet away.  What could possibly happen to me?  Still, I was a little nervous as I crossed the parking lot, a flicker of movement in my peripheral vision catching my eye.  Checking, without trying to look like I was checking, I spotted a tall, dark haired man in a long, black coat walking in the same direction.

No big deal, it was a public place.  It wasn’t that unusual for the guy to be going out to dinner like I was.  I slowed my walk, opting to let him go through the doors ahead of me, but he slowed his speed as well, keeping pace with me.  That was a little odd, but maybe he was trying to be polite?  A ladies first kind of thing?

Darting another look at him, I saw he watched me intently, his dark eyes locking with mine.  Stopping in my tracks, a ribbon of panic went through me as he came to a standstill as well, and very slowly, his lips curved up into a smile.  I was officially creeped out… A closer look confirmed it, he had no visible aura whatsoever.

Tall, dark and creepy was definitely a demon.

The restaurant door opened, and a chattering party of four came out, arguing over the benefits and liabilities of cloth napkins over paper ones.  Seizing the distraction, I ran for the door, not caring if I looked like a crazy person as I zipped in behind them.  Throwing the hostess a sheepish grin, I held up two fingers, keeping an eye on the door.

While she turned around to grab a couple of menus, my tall friend entered the restaurant.  His head tilted to the air as he sniffed the strong cooking smells wafting from the kitchen, but his eyes returned to me as he licked his lips.  “Adamiel…” I breathed, calling him out of habit, but I knew he wouldn’t come.

“Samael,” I tried again, that time a little louder, and the hostess turned around with an inquiring look on her face.  “I’m sorry, I’m waiting for a friend, Samael.  Can I wait in the bar until he arrives?”  Luckily, it was a normal enough request and she didn’t look twice at me for having suggested it.

The bar was sparsely populated, and I started to think it was a mistake in going there, but surely the demon wouldn’t attack me in plain sight of others, would he?  “Samael, where are you?” I asked into the air, waving off the bartender who came when I spoke.  The last thing I needed was a drink clouding my thoughts.

“Why you don’t call Adamiel?” The demon asked, sliding onto the barstool next to me, spinning first one way and then the other, as if he’d never sat on a swiveling barstool before.  His voice was low and gravely, as if he had trouble forming words in English.

“What makes you think I haven’t already?” I challenged, eager to keep him talking, anything to stall him until help arrived.  He laughed, a chortling sound, and I saw the sharp teeth.

“Adamiel already be here if coming.  That one fast.”

“He happens to be busy at the moment,” I replied loftily. “But he’s not the only friend I have.”

“Ubel no afraid of Samael.”  His chest puffed out as his fist thumped against it.

“You should be,” Sam joined in the conversation.  Only he bore very little resemblance to the Sam I had come to know and love.  Gone was the clueless, puppydog expression, his voice full of barely controlled menace.  Dressed in a dark, slim fitting, long sleeved shirt and black pants, he looked absolutely lethal.  Apparently, Ubel thought so too, his eyes widened to the size of saucers.  He nearly broke the barstool in getting to his feet, but his words were full of bravado.

“Ubel no afraid.  Fight Samael and take Mercy.”  His lips peeled back from the gruesomely sharp teeth to reveal his wicked smile.

“There is no mercy for you here, Imp.  Begone or you will taste the end of my blade.”  Sam’s voice was low and dangerous, but there was no sign of the sword just yet.  I took a quick peek around the bar and noticed a few of the patrons watching us curiously.  Whatever they did, I hoped it didn’t cause a big scene.  I was already keenly aware of the fact I had started to glow faintly, my Grace sensing my fear and readying to protect me.

“Ubel take Mercy for Raum.  Then Ubel feast,” he chortled, and something about the way he said feast made me think he spoke about having me for the main course.  No longer in the least bit interested in dinner, my stomach clenched into a hard knot, but Sam looked cool as a cucumber.

“Mercy, perhaps you should leave, I can easily handle this miscreant.”

“I think maybe that’s a good idea…” I started to edge towards the exit, but Ubel’s hand snaked out to grab my arm.  His fingers barely brushed against my skin when he was whipped away, picked up and thrown bodily to slam against the top of the bar, Sam’s hand firm against his throat.  All so fast it took no more than the blink of an eye.

“Hey…” The bartender started our way but stopped in his tracks when Sam looked up and met his gaze.  “Take it easy, buddy,” he added from a safe distance.

Returning his attention to the demon he held easily pinned to the bar, Sam’s expression became serene and without malice, which was almost kinda scarier.  “I gave you a chance to walk away, Imp, but you have been tried by your actions.  I judge thee, unclean thing.  I abjure thee, and cast thee into the cleansing fires of hell.”  His hand started to glow and Ubel’s mouth fell open with a horrible gurgle.

“Uh, Sam…?” I was almost afraid to interrupt, but everyone was staring.  “Are you sure that’s such a good idea, right here?”

“It won’t take but a moment, Mercy.  It must be done.”

Then I did touch his arm, and I could feel my Grace reaching out to his in calm, soothing waves.  “Samael… this isn’t the place and time.  They can see you.”  For long seconds I worried I wasn’t getting through to him, but then he looked up and I saw my Sam gazing back at me, traces of guilt in his expression.

“I’m sorry, I forgot.”  Easing up on his hold, he pulled Ubel down off the bar, but kept one hand clamped tight to his shoulder.

“Let Ubel go,” the demon whined. “Ubel leave Mercy alone.”  It was pathetic coming from such a big man, but before I could say more, I saw Ben standing in the doorway to the bar entrance.

“Oh no…” I breathed, knowing he’d probably blow a gasket when he saw what was going on.  “Sam, you’d better…”

“I’m right on top of it,” Sam nodded, hauling Ubel towards the back door, just as Ben spotted us and started over.

For once, I didn’t have to come up with a lame excuse as to what had happened, but I also didn’t exactly feel like sticking around and ordering dinner anymore either.

“Hey, is everything alright?” Ben asked, his brow already furrowed with worry.

“Yeah, it is now.” I leaned in to kiss his cheek.  “Luckily, Sam was around and took care of it.”  Immediately I saw I’d made a mistake in using those words.  He wanted to be the one to save the day.   But what was I supposed to do, let every demon in town have a taste so Ben could act the hero?

“Was that the Azazael guy?”

“No, that was something else.” I had to admit, and it was obvious that wasn’t what he wanted to hear either.

“You’re killing me…”

“It’s not my fault,” I grumbled.  After all, it wasn’t my idea to be attacked in public.

Ben softened his tone, rubbing my back soothingly.  “Maybe you’d better tell me what’s going on now?”  I nodded, leading him from the restaurant, to the relief of the management.  I can never go there again, you know.  Not that it’s such a terrible problem in the grand scheme of things, but they had great fajitas, I’m just saying.

On the way back to my apartment, I told him all about the demon lord who wanted to bring me back to his place for a little Grace buffet.  I have to say, Ben absorbed the news fairly well.  I had half expected him to demand I move in with him or get a permanent police escort, but he only nodded, deep in thought.

“What will Sam do to that guy?” he asked finally, when we were inside my apartment.

“I’m not sure,” I frowned. “He was going on about damnation and fiery pits of hell and all that jazz.  So, whatever it is, it’s not a vacation.”

“He can do that?”  All I could do was shrug; it wasn’t anything we’d talked about before. I made a mental note to add it to my growing list of questions for Sam.  “I’m just glad you’re alright.” He pressed a kiss to my temple and I gave him a grateful smile for being so understanding.

“Me too.  This wasn’t exactly how I thought our night out would go, but I’m glad you’re here.”

“Oh, and how did you think our night would go?”  Ben wrapped his arms around me, pulling me close.  “I thought we might end up somewhere right… about… here.”

Leaning in to his kiss, I let myself forget about all the ugly things out there after me.  I took solace in the feel of his lips on mine, his familiar scent, the way he made me feel.  Safe and secure… until I realized - that’s exactly what Azazael would want me to feel.  Even though I was about ninety-nine percent positive it was actually Ben I was kissing, that niggling doubt pushed its way deeper into my thoughts, until I pulled my mouth from his, unable to let things go any farther.

“What’s wrong?” He frowned at catching my expression and I scrambled to change the subject.

“Nothing… I’m hungry, aren’t you?”

“I thought that was pretty obvious,” he grinned, hands still resting on my hips.

“No, I mean, we skipped dinner.  I could whip us up something pretty quick or we could send out for pizza.  What sounds good to you?”  It was pretty obvious food wasn’t on his mind, but Ben let go of me with a sigh, moving to sit on one of the barstools while I made us a simple meal.  It went like that for the rest of the night.  Ben would make a romantic overture and I’d hesitate or pull away before things got too intimate.

I wouldn’t have blamed him if he’d gone home for the night, but he stuck by me, falling asleep beside me without pressuring for more.  Sleep wouldn’t come for me, no matter what I tried.  The idea that it might not actually be Ben sleeping next to me sent me out to lie on the couch with a book and a soft, fuzzy blanket, hoping to distract my overactive imagination into letting go.

* * *

It was late when my cell phone rang.  I might not have even noticed if I’d been asleep, my phone automatically went to silent at eleven o’clock.  The number on the screen flashed as ‘restricted’, but I answered it anyway.

“Hello?”  There was no answer, but the line remained open, and I could tell someone was on the other side.  “Hello,” I repeated softly. “Is anybody there?”  All at once I had the strangest feeling… “Adam?  Is that you?”  With a click, the line went dead, a strong confirmation in my books.

Maybe it was because I’d called him earlier that night, maybe he wanted to know I was alright.  Maybe I was being a total idiot and it was only a wrong number.  The more I thought about it, the more convinced I became it was Adam reaching out to me.  Deciding it couldn’t hurt to try it, I pulled up the recent call log.  More than likely whoever was on the other side would be annoyed to have me call back at such a late hour, but I still hit the button, holding my breath as I waited to see who would pick up.

The line clicked on, but no one said anything.  “Adam?” I tried again, “it’s me.”  Still, no one replied, but neither did they hang up, and I took that as a good sign.  I probably should have hung up, but instead I couldn’t help myself.  “I’ll bet you’re wondering why I called for you tonight.  I’m okay,” I began, as though he’d answered me.  For no particular reason, I went on to give a little summary of what went down in the bar at La Hacienda, leaving out any references to angels or demons, trusting he’d know what was going on by the players involved.  I could almost imagine him listening to me, the eye roll that would come from my describing Sam as menacing.  After I was done telling him about that, I talked about how things were going at work, with Matty and Daphne, my visit with Sam; pretty much everything except for Ben and me.  It was probably the strangest wrong number that caller ever got before, but it made me feel closer to Adam, even if it was more imagined than real.  When I talked myself out, I sat there with that open connection, in the darkness of my apartment.  “Are you still there?” I asked at long length, and was greeted with the click of the lost call.  Unwilling to let it go without getting a final goodbye in, I sent a text, *goodnight*.   I needed that little bit of closure.  After several minutes, my phone flashed with an incoming text message.

*Goodnight Mercy*

Chapter Five

I settled into my new routine without too many wrinkles in the plan.  During the day I was fairly safe as long as I stuck to my apartment or crowded, public places.  Sam apologized for giving me the impression that demons required absolute darkness to move around the earth.  Apparently they preferred the darkness, sticking to shadows whenever possible and direct sunlight made them uncomfortable, but they didn’t turn into a pile of dust like vampires, unfortunately.  My biggest early warning device against them was the lack of an aura, and it became a regular pastime for me to check auras before I even checked faces whenever someone approached.

Ben stuck to me like glue whenever he was off duty, and Sam took over on nights I had to work.  He became a regular fixture in the late hours at Eden.  It got so that the only place I was guaranteed a little privacy was in the bathtub, but even then I usually had Mimsy as a companion, given her obsession with bubbles.

I was willing to trade a little bit of privacy in order to keep from being demon food.  Azazael hadn’t made a single move so far that I was aware of.  No more strange dreams and no unusual visitors, until one early evening when Daphne came into the club for a drink, an unfamiliar face following close behind.

“Hey, Daph,” I smiled in greeting, sliding over her favorite drink, “Who’s your friend?”

“Hi Mercy, this is Mitch.  Mitch, you’d better be nice to Mercy, she’s my best friend.”

“I’ll be on my best behavior,” he grinned, revealing very even, very white teeth.  Mitch was a good looking guy overall.  His hair was a little long for my tastes, and I liked my men clean shaven (he had a serious case of nine o’clock shadow), but I could see what attracted her.

“Keep an eye on him for me, I’m gonna hit the ladies room.”

“I can’t make any promises, I am working,” I smiled back at her, but it was slow enough I had time to chat.  The music was loud as usual, and I leaned over a little to make sure he could hear me.  “What can I get you, Mitch?”

“How about a long, slow, comfortable screw?” His smile grew cheesy, like he thought he’d made the funniest joke on the planet.

Oh great, he was one of those.  We usually got at least one a night, some guy ordering a blow job and then patting his lap when I showed up with the drink.  So far Parker wasn’t too keen on me dumping the drink in their laps, so I put on a tight smile, standing back up straight so he couldn’t see down my top.  Our work uniforms weren’t super revealing, a black vest paired with a black skirt.   Well, it could be revealing, if I left a button or two open or shortened my skirt like some of the waitresses did.  But I had to bend and reach for things a lot as a bartender, so I tried not to push the boundaries of good taste.  “One screw, coming up.”  I had to say I liked Jake better than Mitch, and I wondered what had happened with him?  They’d been getting along great the last I heard.   “So, how do you know Daphne?”

“One of those chance encounters,” he continued to smile at me, watching my every move while I prepared his drink.  Did he think I was going to make it wrong?  “I’m glad we met because I’m thinking there are other forces at work here.”

“I beg your pardon?”  My brows rose, not quite picking up what he was laying down.

“You and me, angel,” he winked.  “How about you slip me your phone number?”

Was he seriously hitting on me when not two minutes before Daphne had declared me her best friend?  Was he mentally deficient or was his ego that big?  “How about you…” I mashed my lips together to keep from completing the thought that might land me in trouble if anyone was listening.  “… enjoy your drink and have a nice night?”

“Oh come on, we both know how it is,” he pressed, leaning closer across the bar.  “I don’t see a ring on your finger, that makes you fair game.  Admit it, you’re curious, I can tell I’m getting to you.”

“That would be revulsion,” I muttered, setting his drink down with a thunk, and I could care less if it sloshed over onto the counter.

“Playing hard to get, I can dig it.” He took it in stride, brushing droplets of his drink from the back of his hand.  “But you and I both know in the end I’ll get what I want.  What we both want.  The sooner you realize it and part those sweet little thighs…”

I’d been trying to tune him out but my head snapped up at that last bit.  Was it Azazael?  Physically they weren’t that dissimilar, same rough body type, same coloring.  The guy came on seriously strong, and this is from a girl who gets hit on as a regular basis in the course and scope of employment.  It was as if he expected me to lie down and do him right there on the bar and I’d only come across an ego like that from a fallen angel.  His aura was a deep purple, but I had no idea if Azazael’s presence would alter how it would appear.

“It’s you, isn’t it?”  My eyes narrowed at him, and he barely missed a beat.

“It’s me, I’m the one,” he grinned widely.  “So, if you want to…”

“Get it through your thick skull, I’m not gonna fuck you!” I yelled, drawing stares from around the room.  Mitch or Azazael, or whoever he was, froze with a deer in the headlights look, and the club got considerably quieter, despite the music.

“I…”

“I know who you are and this isn’t gonna work, so leave me the hell alone!”

Parker appeared at my elbow, his hands raised in a supplicating gesture.  “Whoa, let’s take it down a notch, okay?” he smiled nervously.

“No, I’m sick and tired of this guy stalking me. I can’t even come to work now without him pushing his way into my life.  I can’t sleep, I can’t…”

“Hey, I never laid eyes on her before tonight, I swear.” Mitch backed away, nearly running into Daphne whose eyes were wide with confusion.

“Get out!”  I was losing it, I know that.  Even then I knew I was acting wildly inappropriate for work.

“What the hell is her problem?  I’m a paying customer.” Mitch picked that moment to get indignant, which was the wrong move to make.

“We here at Eden respectfully reserve the right to tell you to go fuck yourself,” Parker waved him off.  “So go be a paying customer somewhere else.”

Grateful for the vote of support, I let out a sigh of relief, noticing my hands were not only shaking, but emitting a faint glow.  Catching up a dishtowel, I covered them as best I could.

“Come on, babe, let’s get out of this dump.” Mitch grabbed Daphne’s arm, but she shrugged out of his hold, her eyes cold.

“I don’t think so.  Find your own way home.”

“Fine, I don’t need this,” he spat out, stalking towards the door.

“Mercy, are you alright?”  Daphne’s concern was warming, but I was still shaky.

“I need a five minute break, Parker.”  I didn’t wait for an answer, I was out from behind the bar like a shot. Daphne nearly crashed into the back of me when I stopped suddenly, realizing I couldn’t go out into the alley for a breath of fresh air, it wasn’t safe.  “I’m gonna use your office, okay?” I asked Parker on the way back.

“Yeah, I’ll just do your job then, huh?” he muttered from behind the bar, but I wasn’t too worried about his nose being out of joint, he’d get over it.  Once I was back in his office, I let go of the dishtowel, glad to see my hands had stopped glowing, though they were still a little shaky.

“What was all that about?” Daphne asked, perching on the side of Parker’s desk while I paced back and forth.

“Where did you meet that guy?”

“I met him at the Peet’s Coffee, he seemed sweet.  What did he do to you?”

“You’ve never seen him before today?”  That fit with my theory that it could be Azazael looking for an in to my life.

“No, why?  What has you so freaked out?  Will you stop moving?  You’re making me dizzy.”  She grabbed me by the arms and I did as she asked, rolling my shoulders to try and let go of some of the tension.

“I think that might have been Azazael.”

Daphne’s jaw dropped open, but God love her, she didn’t question my theory to start with.  “Holy cow, really?  What makes you think so?”

“The second you left he started hitting on me,” I replied, quick to continue when her eyes started to roll. “No, I mean really obnoxious stuff, not the normal lines I get at work.  When he started talking about my thighs that’s when it hit me…  What if Azazael possessed that guy to try to get to me?  It sounds exactly like what Sam said he would try if the dreamland thing didn’t work.  What… do you think I’m overreacting?”

“Maybe he was just a pig?  It does happen you know.”

“But some of the things he said, they were just like the stuff Azazael was saying to me, that’s what made me think of him.  Either way, you definitely don’t want to see that guy again.  You didn’t give him your phone number, did you?”

“No, he didn’t ask for my number.  He asked me out for a drink, so we came here.”

Yet another reason in my favor, by my way of thinking.  The guy asked for my number inside of thirty seconds, why not ask for Daphne’s?  I know I have the angelic allure going on, but Daphne is really pretty on her own, with long blonde hair and a perpetual tan, she’s never been short on dates, no matter what she says.  “Promise me you won’t go picking up guys in coffee shops any time soon, okay?”

“I don’t see why my dating life has to suck just because you’re demon bait,” she grumbled.

“Be careful, that’s all I’m asking.”

“You sound like my mother.” Her nose wrinkled with distaste and we shared a laugh.  I was feeling a lot better about the whole thing.  If that was Azazael’s best shot, he’d have to try a lot harder to get to me.

“I should get back before Parker gets into one of his moods.  Are you gonna stick around for a while or are you going home?”

“My night just opened up, so I’m free.”

“Okay, first round is on me.”  I ventured back to the bar, not quite sure what mood I’d find Parker in, but he seemed fine.  Concerned even.

“Feeling better?”

“Yeah, I’m sorry about that, Parker.  I know I shouldn’t talk to customers that way…”

“Don’t sweat it, darlin’.  I can stand to lose an asshole like that.  I can’t have people thinking they can treat my girls like that, right?”  His arm came around my shoulder, and I returned the one armed hug with a relieved smile.

“Ah, my knight in shining armor,” I batted my eyelashes at him dramatically until he gave a lopsided grin.

“Knight in shining armor, I could get used to that.”

“Aren’t you going to introduce me to your friend, honey?”

I realized there was a blonde woman standing on the other side of the bar, watching us expectantly.  “Yeah, honey, introduce us.” I couldn’t help but smile at Parker’s flush of embarrassment.  Parker had his share of women, but most of them didn’t show much of an interest in us.  Of course, most of the time Parker didn’t have his arm wrapped around the staff either, which he was quick to correct, his hand dropping my shoulder to scratch the back of his neck

“Ah… hey, babe.  You’re here.”  His smile was only slightly tinged with guilt, which was odd for Parker.  So far as I knew, he was never guilty about anything.  “This is Mercy, she’s one of my oldest friends.”  That was news to me, and I couldn’t help but smile at hearing he considered me to be one of his oldest friends.

“Oh, you’re Mercy.”  Something about the way she said it made me think she was less than thrilled to make my acquaintance.  Once I got a better look at her, I wasn’t so sure I was all that happy to meet her either.  She was pretty in a high maintenance kind of way.  Blonde hair with expensive highlights, too much gold jewelry, ridiculously high heels with skinny jeans.  An off the shoulder top showed she didn’t believe in tan lines and the bright pink lipstick with matching nails proved she didn’t have any taste.  Her aura was a muddy orange, a little darker than Parker’s, but there were brown blotches spread through it like mold.  That meant while she wasn’t exactly evil incarnate, she definitely wasn’t in the running for the humanitarian of the year award either.

I was staring, and pulled myself out of it, pasting on a polite smile.  “Yep, I’m Mercy.  Sorry, I didn’t catch your name.”

“Oh, sorry, this is Sharona, she’s my…”

“Significant other,” she supplied, and I saw Parker give a bemused nod. “I’ll have a seven and seven with sugar on the rim and three maraschino cherries please.”

“Coming right up.”  My smile stayed fixed, though for the life of me, I couldn’t figure out what Parker saw in the woman.  It wasn’t like he was hurting for female companionship.  He was rich and good looking, somewhere in his mid to late thirties I guessed, with pale blue eyes and tousled, dark blonde hair that made my fingers itch to push away from his forehead sometimes.  A notorious flirt, Parker always enjoyed playing the field.  But her?  She was about as genuine as my vinyl couch.  Even if I didn’t have the window into her soul, I knew she was bad news.  But Parker ate it up, smiling back at her in a goofy manner.

“Parker, I want to sit.”  Like a dog dancing for its master, I watched Parker run around the other side of the bar, brushing off the barstool before she planted her bony ass onto it.  With an effort, I snapped my jaw shut from where it had been hanging open, darting a quick look at Daphne, who sat a few seats down, watching the exchange with interest.

“So, how did you kids meet?” I asked, busying myself with her drink before she cracked the whip.

“It’s kind of funny actually, at the…”

Sharona cut him off midsentence.  “I met Parker at the Jaguar dealership.  He was the sweetest guy ever.  Weren’t you, pooky?”

“You’re buying a Jag?” My brows came up in surprise both at the story and the ‘pooky’.

“I’m thinking about it,” Parker tried to downplay it.

“Remind me later to ask you for a raise,” I murmured, sticking my tongue out at him playfully when he pretended like he wanted to backhand me.  “And it was love at first sight, was it?  That’s so romantic,” I added, laying it on thick, mostly to watch Parker squirm.

Her pink nails raked across Parker’s chest, drawing his full attention back to her.  “It was very romantic.  Well… steamy at any rate.”  Her smile turned sly and she dropped me a wink.  “I don’t have to tell you, do I, sweetie?”

Wait, did she think I was sleeping with Parker?  “I wouldn’t know,” I replied, but I wasn’t sure Sharona heard me anyway, she was too busy whispering something racy into Parker’s ear.  At least, I assumed it was racy from the look on his face and the way Parker’s hand slid around her waist.

I knew I had something unpleasant to do and I wavered back and forth, trying to decide if it was any of my business or if I should leave matters alone.  But what would you do?  If you knew with absolute certainty that your friend was about to be hurt by someone who didn’t give a damn about him, would you sit back and let it happen?

Clearing my throat, I slid the drink across the bar.  “Here you go, a seven and seven with sugar on the rim and three maraschino cherries, enjoy.  Ah, Parker… do you think I could talk to you for a minute?”

“Not now, Merce, I’m busy.”  Parker didn’t even look at me, too interested in looking down the side of her top.

“That’s alright, pooky.  I’m going to the little girl’s room, I’ll be right back.”  Sharona took a sip of the drink through the teeny, tiny straw, making a silly noise as she drank.  “Good job, sweetie, really yummy.” I felt like a dog that had just been patted.  Parker watched her sashay away, and I had to reach over the bar to tug at his shirt to get his attention.

“Really?  Come on Parker, you can do so much better than that,” I hissed as soon as she was out of earshot.

“Don’t start…”

“We’re such ‘old friends’, who else is gonna have the guts to tell you she’s a gold-digger.”

“You don’t know that.”

“Oh please, she picked you up at a Jag dealership!”

“She happens to have her own money.”

“That doesn’t mean she’s not after yours,” I retorted, dropping my voice again before I started to get carried away.

“You don’t even know her.”

I could hardly tell him I was reading her soul.  “Call it… feminine intuition.  I can tell she’s not a good person.”

“Yeah well, based on your behavior tonight, I wouldn’t say your judgment is ringing any bells,” he muttered, raking his fingers through his hair.  “If I didn’t know better I’d think you were jealous.”

“Jealous?” I blinked, shocked he would say such a thing.  “When have I ever been jealous of any of the bimbos you’ve brought around before?”

“And yet the first time I bring by someone with style and class, you go apeshit on me.  Is that what it is, Mercy?  All of a sudden when I meet someone I could really care about, you decide you want a turn?”

“Is that what you told her?  Is that why she looked at me like I was your old discarded goods?  Come on, Parker, you don’t honestly care about that piece of trash do you?”

“That’s enough!” His hand slammed down on the bar, hard enough to make me jump.  “Go home.  You’re of no use to me like this.  And when you come back, be prepared to show a little respect for me and my girlfriend, or don’t come back at all.”

I stared at him, stunned by the angry physical response as well as the words that stung even more.  “Fine.” I peeled off my apron, tossing it into the dirty glass hopper.  “I can use a little fresh air, it’s getting thick in here.”

By the time I retrieved my purse and coat, Daphne was standing by the door, waiting for me.  “Wow.  What was that all about?”

“I don’t like his new girlfriend.”

“No yeah, I heard all of that, the whole bar heard most of it.  I meant, what was all that about between you and Parker?”

“What do you mean?

“Are you jealous?”

“No,” I gave an inelegant snort.  “I don’t think of Parker like that, he’s my boss.”

“Are you sure?  The way you two flirt together… sometimes, I wonder.”

Ridiculous.  I waved the idea away as I pulled my coat on, studiously avoiding looking in the direction of the bar as we made our way to the door.  “That’s just the way he is.  I’m not stuck on Parker.  I’m practically living with Ben.”  Any overflow feelings I might be struggling with ran to a certain dark angel…

“Okay, I believe you.  I’m just saying, to those of us on the outside looking in, that kinda looked like a lovers’ quarrel.”

“Super.  I can imagine the gossip the next time I come into work.”  It was already starting to circulate as our bouncer Walter looked away with an embarrassed nod as we passed the door.  He’d always had a bit of a crush on me, and now he thought I was sleeping with the boss… swell.  “Well, it’s the last time I try and save him from making decisions with the wrong head.  If he wants to get mixed up with a piece of work like that, he can suffer the consequences on his own, my conscience is clear.”

“Why, what was wrong with her?  I mean besides the obvious ‘stick up her behind’ angle, some guys are into that.”

“She’s not a good person, trust me.  Her soul was all brown and yucky. I wouldn’t wish someone like that on anyone.”  The worst thing was, Parker seemed to be in deep smit, and I hated to think of him going through the emotional wringer when I could put a stop to it.  Then again, if someone had marched up to me and told me who to love, I would have told them to go jump.

“Ah, the angelic spidey sense kicks in,” Daphne nodded, accepting that without further need for explanation.  “You can’t help who you fall in love with though.”

“Don’t I know it,” I sighed, stepping out into the crisp night air.  “Want to go back to my place?  I’ve got Vikings on Netflix and ice cream in the freezer.”

“Sounds good, I’ll follow you back to your place.  Unless you want to ride together?”

I spotted Sam waiting against my car and shook my head.  “No, I’m good.  I’ll meet you there.”  Fairly sure he was keeping a low profile and couldn’t be seen, I approached the driver’s side door, not wanting to look like I was talking to open air.  “Hey, Sam, how goes the night shift?”

“It goes well.  All is quiet.”

“Quiet is good, that’s what I like to hear.”

“Everything is well?  You seem… agitated.” His head canted to one side to study me.

“It’s nothing, human stuff, nothing to worry about.”  I did my best to change the subject because in truth, I was still pretty bummed about the way I’d left things with Parker.  “Listen, we’re headed back to my place to watch a movie and commiserate over the inconstancy of men.  Do you want to hang out with us?”

“As much as I yearn to do so,” his lips quirked, “I hardly think I am qualified.”

“You don’t have to be qualified to hang out.  All you need is to be there.  Besides, you should probably meet Daphne, don’t you think?  She knows all about you already.”  He hesitated and I could tell he wanted to, but struggled with what he thought he should do.  “The offer stands if you’d like a little bit of company,” I shrugged, done with the dispensing of advice for the night.  “Do you want to ride back with me or…?”

“Thank you no, I’ll manage on my own,” he replied hurriedly, as I expected.  We’d never spoken about it, but I knew Sam had an intense dislike of all motor vehicles.  I suspect he thought they were unnatural, and with his wings, I could understand why he felt no need of them, but I still offered to be polite.

“Oh, by the way, what’s your stance on Norse Gods?  Myth or basis in reality?”  I asked out of curiosity, since I had a certain brawny deity on my mind and in my DVD player.

“Officially… I have no comment.  Unofficially, I quite enjoy their mythos, but Greek Gods have always been my favorites.”

Oh, there was so much more I wanted to ask him… but a couple pulled up into the space next to mine and I couldn’t easily continue the conversation.  “Okay, later, Sam,” I whispered, as I ducked into my seat.

By the time I got home, Daphne was already waiting for me in my apartment with the TV on and the ice cream dished out into tall beer steins.  I gave my seal of approval and went to change out of my work clothes when I heard the knock on the front door.  “Unless that’s the God of Thunder himself, send whoever it is away,” I called out, trusting her to handle it.

“Hey, Mercy, I don’t suppose it matters, but there’s this completely adorable guy standing out in the hallway watching your door.”

Chapter Six

“What?” I ducked my head out of the bedroom, still pulling on my comfy top.

“Uh oh, I think he heard us, he’s gone.”  Daphne stood with her eye pressed to the peep hole in the front door.

“What did he look like?”

“Um, kinda tall, blonde wavy hair… oh duh, I think it’s Sam!”

“He’s probably still there then,” I muttered, pulling open the front door, I frowned to find it empty.  As far as I knew, Sam hadn’t found a way to make himself invisible to me.  “Sam?”  I stepped out into the hallway, wrapping my warm, fuzzy cardigan a little tighter to my body.  There was no answer and I started to wonder if it wasn’t such a hot idea to step out of my apartment into a deserted hallway with a pack of demons on my trail.  “Sam, is that you or should I call the cops?”  The top of Sam’s head peeked out of the stairwell, just his eyes visible, and he gave a shy, little wave.  “What are you doing down there?”  I waved him over.  “Are you trying to give me a heart attack?  I started to think there was someone out here waiting to get me.” I grabbed his elbow and tugged him closer once he came into reach.

“I panicked,” he said softly and I blinked at him, digesting that for a moment.  The big bad angel of death (formerly anyway) who I’d seen slam a demon down on a bar one handed, had panicked?

“Why?”

“It wasn’t you who came to the door.”

I mashed my lips together to keep from smiling over the admission; it was a big step that he was there at all.  “It’s only Daphne, who you’ve seen a zillion times, why don’t you come on in and meet her?”  I could see her out of the corner of my eye, practically vibrating with excitement to finally meet my ‘guardian angel’.

“Alright,” he nodded, looking all around as he stepped over the threshold, as if he hadn’t been inside my apartment before.  Come to think of it, it was Adam who’d spent more time at my place, not Sam.

“Sam, this is Daphne, Daphne, Sam,” I did the honors, and Daphne stuck out her hand.

“How do you do?” she said formally.

“Very well thank you, and yourself?”  Sam took her hand and clasped it in his briefly before letting go.

“Fine, thank you.”  They were both so friendly and polite; I hoped it wouldn’t be awkward for the rest of the night.  I shut the door behind us, turning back to see them staring back at each other, neither one of them uttering a word until Sam spoke again.

“I have heard many good things about you, Daphne, Mercy speaks well of you, indeed.”

A smile spread over Daphne’s face as she came back to life.  “She talks up a storm about you too.  Though I have to admit, for a while I wasn’t sure if you were real or a figment of her imagination.”

“Understandable,” he nodded soberly.

“Jiminy Christmas, but your eyes are blue…” she murmured and Sam stood very still while she finished her inspection.

“Yes, they are,” he nodded again.  “You are quite colorful as well.”

“I am?” she looked down at her clothes.  Dressed casually for her impromptu date with Mitch, she was wearing a pale blue sweater over slim fitting jeans.

“Yes, I can see why Mercy is so fond of you.”  Sam’s eyes swept over her body and I began to understand he was talking about the quality of her soul which radiated a bright, cheerful orange with warm pink highlights.  Sensing her confusion, I decided to break up the little love fest in the hallway, moving past them into the living room.

“Okay, guys, its time for the movie.  Sam, would you like some ice cream?”

“No, thank you.”

Daphne followed my lead, with Sam trailing along behind.  “Are you sure?  It’s chocolate fudge explosion.”

“Explosion is good?” His brows climbed dubiously, taking a seat beside me on the couch.  Mimsy immediately jumped onto his lap and he stroked her back absently.

“Very good,” I nodded, putting a small bite on the end of my spoon and holding it up to him.  “It can’t hurt to try it, right?”  He leaned towards the spoon, eyeing the melting concoction warily before taking the tiniest bit between his lips.

I don’t know if you’ve ever seen someone taste chocolate for the first time ever, but I swear it was right up there with a religious experience, and for an angel, that’s saying a lot.  Sam’s entire face transformed into a wondrous smile, tongue darting out to moisten his lips.  “What do you think?” I grinned.

“Explosion is very good,” Sam nodded, with a longing look to the rest of my ice cream.

“Here, knock yourself out,” I handed the stein full of ice cream over and rose to make myself another.  “Oh, but don’t eat it too… fast…”  I looked back to see his mouth closing around an enormous bite of ice cream, his eyes widening slightly at the temperature change.  “You might end up with an ice cream headache.”  It was a little late for the warning, and sure enough, his face scrunched up tight with pain.

“Ahhh…  I do not like ice cream explosions,” he frowned, setting the cup down on the table as he pressed a hand to his head.

Daphne’s face was a study of sympathy and she set her ice cream down to pick up his other hand.  “It’ll pass in a sec, take a deep breath.” She breathed with him, and I watched out of the corner of my sight while she nursed him through the traumatic experience.  “Is that better now?”

“Yes, thank you,” he nodded, blinking rapidly.

“Sorry, I did try to warn you, but you were too quick,” I called out, putting the ice cream container back in the fridge.  “Just go a little slower with the rest of it.”

“No, thank you, I have had enough ice cream.”  Sam regarded the melting treat with suspicion.

“It’ll be okay, Sammy, take smaller bites.  It’ll be fine,” Daphne nodded encouragingly, taking a relatively small bite herself to show him.  If Sam had any reservations at being addressed as ‘Sammy’, he didn’t show them.  Instead he picked up the stein again, placing the smallest of bites onto the end of the spoon.

“Like this?”

Leaving them to figure out the eating lesson, I put the movie in, and settled back on the other end of the couch since Daphne had scooted into my seat.  The two of them seemed to be getting along like gangbusters.  I could see how his often clueless manner would attract Daphne, she was always one for taking care of strays.  She’d always been much more patient than I was.  I tended to try and leave Sam to figure things out on his own unless I spotted him headed for danger, but she was having a good time guiding him through the ins and outs of chocolate, so who was I to interfere?

We watched the movie and by the time it was over, Sam lost any discomfort in being around Daphne.  In fact, they chatted like old pals.  I’m honest enough to admit I felt a small pang of jealousy at having to share Sam with someone else, even my best friend.  Even though it was my idea in the first place to get them together, I was a little sad to see Sam adapt to spending time with someone else so easily.  I was used to being the only person who could see him, and there was something special about that.  Now he was listening raptly to Daphne explain why eating turkeys and watching parades on TV was a sign of giving thanks in November.

“Why would you not offer a simple prayer of thanks every day?  Why only once per year in an expression of gluttony?”

“Because… it’s a family day that way.  A good chance to spend some time together and catch up.”

“Why would you not spend time with your family otherwise?”  Sam was genuinely puzzled by the notion.

“He’s obviously never met my family,” I snorted, earning an eye roll from Daphne.

“It’s getting late,” she yawned, making me yawn in turn.

“Yes, it is,” Sam nodded, matter of factly, missing the point behind that statement entirely.

“I’m gonna head for home. Sam, do you need a ride anywhere?”

“No, thank you, I do not require a ride.”

“Sam’s not big on cars, but he has his own mode of transportation.”  I rose and stretched as she found her shoes and slipped them back on.

“Oh, the evening is at an end?”  Realization dawned on him and his expressive face registered disappointment so sharply, you would have thought I’d just drowned a kitten.

“Yeah, some of us have to sleep,” I pointed out, stifling another yawn as I escorted Daphne to the door.  Sam brought up the rear, clearly reluctant to go.  “Thanks for coming over, Daph, I had fun.”

“Me too.”  We hugged and then she turned and hugged Sam as well without stopping to think about it twice.  Sam froze the instant her arms closed around him, a deer in the headlights look coming over his face.  I shot him a sympathetic look, and he eased as soon as she let go of him.  “It was so nice to finally meet you, I’m sorry it took so long.”

“As am I,” he replied a little dazedly, but his gentle expression returned as soon as she stepped out of his personal space.

“Are you going home then?” I asked, refraining from hugging him as well since he looked like he a little on overload at the moment.

“No, I’ll stay until dawn as I always do.”

A pang went through me as I realized how uncomfortable that must be for him, to have to give up half of his day in trying to keep me safe, and there I was kicking him to the curb.  “You could stay you know, if you promise to be quiet and let me get some rest,” I offered, and Daphne’s face lit up, the way it does when she gets a scathingly brilliant idea.

“Maybe Sam should stay here with you for a while?  Then you would have a roomie to keep the demons at bay, and he wouldn’t have to skulk around in the hallway?”

It wasn’t a half bad idea.  Though in retrospect, probably not a decision I should have made at that time of night, but I have a history of making rash decisions sometimes.  “I don’t know, it seems like that would be a big imposition, Sam likes his privacy, don’t you?” I asked dubiously.

Sam looked as though we’d just given him a new puppy.  Or another bowl of ice cream.  “I wouldn’t mind in the least bit staying with you.  If you wanted me to, that is.”  Oh, the look on his face…  How was I supposed to say no to that?  Especially with Daphne bouncing beside him, convinced in the beauty of the plan.

“Well, if you wouldn’t mind… I mean you’d have to be quiet, no DVD’s at all hours.”

“I would, I spend most of my time reading, that would not disturb you if I kept a light on in here, would it?”

“And you’d have to stay out of sight when Ben is here.  You know the two of you don’t exactly have a great history there.”

“I can do that,” he nodded quickly.  “He’ll never know I’m here.”

“You could even have the two of them meet, who knows, they might get along once they get to know each other.”

Ah, I admired Daphne’s sweet optimism, but I knew better.  Ben already had a chip on his shoulder about Sam looking out for me, he’d go ballistic if he knew Sam was hanging around 24/7.  “One thing at a time,” I gave her a half smile.

“Cool, then I’ll see you guys later,” Daphne grinned, making her exit.

“Will she be alright getting home at this hour?” Sam frowned at the closed door.

Was I mistaken or was Sam a little sweet on her?  “Oh yeah, she’s done it a million times before.  But you can see her home if you want to make sure.”

“No, my duty lies in your protection.”  He shuffled away from the door, but the frown remained fixed.

“Sam, you don’t have to stick to my side like glue all the time.  I’m sure I’ll be safe enough here at home if you want to go spend more time with Daphne.”  He looked unconvinced and I pressed on.  “You got there quick enough the last time.  What happened to that guy by the way?  What was his name?  Urckel?”

“Ubel.” His expression turned grim.  “He will trouble you no longer.”

“Meaning…”

“I disposed of him.”

“As in killed?”

His head tilted to one side. “Do you really want to know?”

Suddenly I was pretty sure I didn’t want to know the details.  All that talk about damnation and hell was enough to paint a picture of something very unpleasant and it wasn’t something I wanted to get into before drifting off to sleep.  “Okay, I’m off to bed then.  Feel free to help yourself to anything you want, I’ll see you in the morning.”  Sam didn’t reply right away, his attention fixed on my small living room, probably looking for something to do, but at least he didn’t have to sit in the hallway outside.  “Goodnight, Sam.”

“Sleep well, Mercy.”

* * *

It turned out Sam’s presence was a useful shield.  There were a few times I would spot someone on the street whose lack of a telltale aura marked them a demon.  Each and every time they faded into the shadows at the sight of Sam and I learned to expect the shift in his demeanor from bashful innocent to lethal killer.  Somehow he was able to make both work in the one package.  A package I couldn’t help but notice Daphne took an interest in.  I never came right out and asked her if she was into Sam because I didn’t want to encourage her.  Sam might be fun to hang around and eat ice cream with, but he was miles away from being relationship material and I didn’t want her to get hurt.

After that Sam started to hang around most nights.  At first I thought I’d never get used to having him underfoot, after all it was a small apartment, but after the novelty wore off we settled into a workable routine.  He didn’t need his own bedroom because he never slept, and during the day he went home to his own place or however else he filled his days.  More than once I woke to find him standing in my bedroom, watching me expectantly, an inane question tumbling from his lips the moment my eyes opened.  But after a good conversation about boundaries, he learned how to give me some privacy when I shut the bedroom door.

It wasn’t the mood killer I thought it would be when Ben stayed over either. I was still leery of starting anything too physically intimate with him anyway, for fear of accidentally giving Azazael what he wanted.  For the most part Sam hung in the background on those nights, watching TV with us and occasionally glancing longingly at whatever we were eating.  Did I mention Sam was fast becoming a real foodie?

At least once a day he rushed over to show me some exciting new concoction he’d discovered in the kitchen.  Half the time I had to patiently explain to him that yes, I have tried peanut butter and jelly before and yes, it is delightful, and the other half I had to pass on whatever strange food combination he’d come up with.  Still, it was nice to have someone to share my meals with when Ben was busy with work, and Sam was a fiend about keeping the kitchen clean.  I can’t tell you what it’s like to come home to an angel in the kitchen in bright yellow gloves singing about spoonfuls of sugar to help with taking medicine while he scrubbed out the oven.

Books began to appear around the apartment, sometimes stacks at a time and more than once I pulled one out of the freezer. It was little things like that I found difficult to explain away to Ben.  Or why I had four separate double batches of different kinds of cookie dough crammed into the fridge (Sam’s venture into baking had ended with his realization that he preferred the raw dough to the finished cookies).  For the most part Ben seemed relieved when I didn’t mention anything about angels or demons in the time we spent together and I thought he might be coming to accept that we could still have a normal life despite those problems.

“Since when did you start reading Tolstoy?”  Ben asked one night, picking the book up from the coffee table.

“It helps me fall asleep,” I shrugged the question away, tossing Sam a wink behind Ben’s back.  It was getting easier to have those dual conversations, and Sam and I developed a form of sign language so I could acknowledge him sometimes without giving away his presence.

“I enjoy Tolstoy,” Sam frowned, fingers opening and closing reflexively as he itched to take the book from him.

“Hey, I wanted to talk to you about Thanksgiving.”  Ben changed the subject.  “It’s around the corner and we haven’t finalized our plans.  I thought we’d eat around two pm, that way there’s plenty of time to enjoy the pie and maybe a little pick up football in the yard afterwards, what do you think?  Does Matt play football?”

“More giving thanks with food,” Sam shook his head.  “I do not understand it.”

“It’s a tradition,” I shot Sam a look before turning to Ben. “Yeah, a tradition for Matt to play football, so consider him in,” I smiled, hoping Matty wouldn’t put up too much of a fuss.  You never could tell if he’d be up for a little male bonding or decide it was too much effort after two kinds of pie.  “But um, isn’t two kind of early for dinner?  You guys could play around outside beforehand and eat like at four.”

“Split the difference and call it three?” he smiled, wrapping an arm around my waist, drawing me closer.  At first I went easily to his side, but then those fears came back and I stiffened beside him.  “Okay, seriously… what’s wrong?”

“Nothing.  I’m not in the mood, that’s all.”

“You’ve been not in the mood for a while now.  In fact, I can’t remember the last time you were in the mood.  What’s going on here, is it that Adam guy?”

“In the mood for what?”  Sam asked in confusion.

“That’s enough,” I scowled in Sam’s direction. “It’s not Adam,” I added a bit softer.  “I mean… I’m not saying there wasn’t something between Adam and me, but he left, so he has absolutely no bearing on what mood I’m in.”

Ben’s brows drew together into a single dark line.  “Are you saying if he hadn’t left you’d be with him right now?”

“He knows!” Sam whispered, his eyes wide.

“There’s nothing to…” with a concerted effort, I tried to focus on one conversation at a time.  “No, I’m not saying that exactly…”

Sam interrupted, a knowing smile on his face.  “Yes you would, you love him.”

“I don’t…”  Christ, was it love?  How could I be in love with someone who kept ditching me at every turn?  It had to be lust, pure and simple, anything else was too complicated.

Ben’s eyes narrowed, searching the room with suspicion.  “He’s here right now, isn’t he?”

“No, I told you Adam’s gone.” I couldn’t keep the melancholy note from my voice, but I was tired of trying to keep that part of my life from Ben just to keep the peace between us.  “But… Sam’s here.”

“Oh no you didn’t!”  Sam’s eyes widened.

“There’s no point in hiding it from him, he’s a trained detective.”

Ben lurched to his feet, trying to look everywhere at once.  “Go ahead then, show yourself.  We might as well be properly introduced, right?”  Sam gave me a last dubious look and I nodded my encouragement before he let himself be seen.  “Jesus, Mary and Joseph…” Ben stumbled back a foot, hand covering his mouth.

“No, just me,” Sam gave him a hesitant smile.

“Ben, this is Sam.”  Introductions seemed unnecessary, but I offered them anyway.

“How long have you been here?”

“I do not know the precise number of years by this calendar…” Sam began.

“No, how long have you been here in the room with us?”

“The entire time.”

“How could you not tell me he was here?”  Ben swung his accusation in my direction.

“Because I didn’t want you to get upset, like you are now.” I couldn’t keep the defensive tone from my voice.  It was exactly what I’d been worried about.  “He’s been keeping me safe.  You wanted me to stay safe, right?”

“Yes, but you said things had settled down.”

Okay, maybe I had downplayed the danger a little, so his reaction couldn’t be helped.  “Yes, because I have an angel by my side all the time.”

“I’m not always by her side. I’m not allowed in the bedroom when the door is closed,” Sam supplied helpfully.  “Or the ladies room when she is at work.”

“I don’t… I don’t know what to say to this.”  Ben raked his fingers through his hair in agitation.

“Oh, come on, Ben.  He’s better than a guard dog, wait, I didn’t mean it like that,” I turned to Sam who wore disgruntled expression.  “I mean… Sam is a good person and he’s my friend and he happens to be one of the more powerful beings on this Earth.  If you can’t accept him for that… then it’s your loss.”

“You’re picking him over me?” Ben was incredulous.

“I’m not picking anyone!” I threw my hands up in frustration.  “I care about both of you, you both care about me, where is the problem here?”

“The problem is you’ve been keeping secrets from me again, Mercy.  I thought that was all behind us.”

“To be fair, there are some things she can’t tell you through no fault of her own.”

Ben had little patience for the interruption.  “Why don’t you take a walk, Buddy?  We’re trying to work a few things out here.”

“You wish me to leave?” Sam blinked.

“Ben…” I tried to soothe him, but he wasn’t in a sootheable state, scowling at Sam.

“Yeah, I friggin’ want you to leave.  Go home and bother someone else.”

“But my place is at her side when darkness is upon us.  I am her roomie.”

I closed my eyes as I waited for Ben’s meltdown.

“This guy is living here with you?”

“Sort of…”

“I think I’m going to be the one to take a walk now, I need some fresh air.” Ben stalked towards the door and I chased after him.

“Wait, Ben, don’t leave like this.  Let’s talk this through.”

“Mercy,” Ben stopped and turned to face me.  “No offense, but I’d rather not be around you right now, okay?  It’s for the best if I leave now before I say something that ends up hurting us both.”

I stood there, rooted in place as I watched him go.  “You just did,” I murmured, but he was already gone.

Chapter Seven

Have you ever noticed that when you’re in a crappy mood, more crap is attracted to you like a huge crap magnet?  Maybe it was my sour attitude, but it seemed like everyone else around me was in grumpy mood as well.  Except for Sam, I didn’t even know if he knew how to be grumpy, but I did notice he tried to stay out of my way.  Ben didn’t call me back when I called him later that night, and the next day at work Parker was still ticked off after our argument about Sharona.  I hadn’t apologized for interfering, and he hadn’t apologized for losing his temper with me, so we both sort of avoided each other as much as possible.

When Sam settled into his usual place at the end of the bar (I’d talked him into coming in and joining the human race, and now he was a regular fixture there), Parker instantly started to bitch about it.  “I oughta start charging this guy rent.”

“You wish me to pay you?”  Sam reached for his pocket and I waved him off.

“No, Sam, don’t pay any attention to him, it’s a figure of speech.”

“Unbefuckinglievable.  Is this guy for real?”  Parker scowled and I followed him back to his office.

“Hey, if you’re pissed off at me, don’t take it out on my friends.”

Oh he was pissed alright, Parker turned around and I could see how agitated he was.  “You know the policy, Mercy, no boyfriends hanging around work.”

“He’s not my boyfriend.  Besides, what about little Miss Jaguar?  She’s been here almost every night this week.”

“It’s my place, my rules.  If you don’t like it, there’s the door.”

“Oh, like you’re really gonna fire me.  Parker, I don’t want to fight with you,” I tried, but he turned away from me to grab a beer from his mini-fridge.

“Try and remember I’m your boss.  You’re supposed to listen when I threaten to turn you out.”

“We’re more than that, aren’t we?  Didn’t you say I’m one of your oldest friends?”

“I don’t know what we are anymore,” he muttered.

That brought me up short.  Were we in that bad of shape?  Were things that bad with Ben too and I just had my blinders on?  Christ, was everything falling apart?  “That hurts, Parker.”  I turned for the door.

“Mercy, wait…”

I had to fix things between us. I missed that old comfortable give and take, the playful banter, even his horrible pick up lines.  “I’m sorry if what I said hurt you, I was trying to look out for you.”

“I know, but she’s not…”

I didn’t want to hear him sing her praises, and I held up my hands to stem the flow of words.  “If she makes you happy that’s all that matters, right?”  I mustered up a hopeful smile, but inside I knew it was only a matter of time before she stomped all over his heart.

“She does.  She makes me very happy.”  There was an atypical smile on his lips and I was struck by how handsome he was without his usual smirk.  It was sad he didn’t smile like that more often.  Crap, maybe the bitch was good for him after all?

“So, are we good?”

“Yeah, c’mere.” He opened his arms and I went to him for a hug, feeling better than I had all day long.  At least one of my relationships was mended; I wasn’t sure I’d be able to hug it out with Ben.  As though he read my mind, Parker’s thoughts fell along a similar line.  “If that’s not your new boyfriend out there, you didn’t break up with the cop then, huh?”

“I don’t know, the jury’s still out on that one,” I sighed, resting my head on his chest.

“Shit, I’m sorry to hear that, darlin’. I know you were pretty into him.  Is he the jealous type?  Doesn’t like goldilocks out there hanging around so much?”

A very simplified way of looking at it, but there was a kernel of truth to it.  “Something like that.”

“Some guys are too insecure to deal with their woman having guy friends.  Me, I’m evolved.  I’m secure enough in my masculinity to allow my woman to have whatever friends she wants, as long as she comes home to me at night.”

I looked up at him like he’d sprouted another head.  Did he really think he was evolved?  “Oh yeah, cause that’s progressive.  Ugg, my woman come home at night.” I thumped my chest like a caveman before dissolving into a fit of giggles, and he nodded, a smile on his lips.

“Say what you will, I wouldn’t kick you out of bed for having a guy friend.”

“I kicked him out of bed.”  So to speak.

“He wasn’t ringing your bell?”

We were rapidly descending into territory I didn’t want to get into.  “It’s a long story, not one I should probably be getting into with my boss.”

“You want me to talk to him, give him a few pointers?” he winked, and I didn’t bother to disguise my roll of the eyes as I pushed away from him.

“I’d better get back out there; I’d hate to get fired.”

“I shoulda fired your lazy ass years ago,” he waved me away and I stopped to bat my eyelashes at him.

“But you value my friendship so very much, right?”

“Well yeah, that and it’s such a nice ass…”

Back on familiar ground, I returned to work feeling much lighter.  At least something in my life was back on track.

* * *

Several hours and lots of laughs later, I was in a much better headspace.  With the air cleared between Parker and me, work became a much more comfortable place.  He was even nice to Sam, apologizing for being rude before.  Somehow I didn’t think I’d get anything like that out of Ben.

Sam forgave and forgot (if he was even ever upset about it in the first place), and we spent some of the down time playing ‘spot the dirtbag’, to use one of Ben’s favorite words that Sam had taken a liking to.  He was, of course, much, much better at it than I was, and could predict almost to the moment when someone’s anger would spill over into violence.  Walter took an instant shine to Sam and they spent a long time talking about football, which Sam had only just discovered.  It was nice to have two facets of my life start to integrate.  And if they thought Sam was a little… quirky, well, there were plenty of quirky people in the city.

The real trick would be mending fences with Ben.  I had absolutely no idea how to go about it, short of cutting Sam out of my life, which I was not prepared to do.  But it was late, and I tried to put it out of my mind as soon as I said goodnight to Sam and slipped into bed.  Instead my thoughts slipped back to part of the conversation with Ben I’d been trying to avoid dealing with, my feelings for Adam.  As I drifted off to sleep, I wondered how I might wander into the Ether, and how to get him to follow, we had a lot to talk about.

* * *

I felt him slip into bed with me and my body instinctively turned towards his, scooting into the shelter of his arms.  He stroked my hair and I snuggled into his welcoming warmth. “You came,” I murmured sleepily.

“I intend to.”

My eyes popped open at the unfamiliar voice and I scooted back with a shriek as I spotted Azazael lying there in my bed.  “What the hell are you doing here?”  I clutched the sheets to my chest, even though I wasn’t wearing anything particularly revealing.  The cold weather found me in soft knit pajamas.

“I thought I’d come to you this time, my love.”

“Don’t call me that.”  How had he managed to get into my bedroom?

“Alright then, blossom.  I could feel you calling me across time and space… I know you’ve been very lonely of late, I came to comfort you.”

An inelegant snort left my lips.  “I don’t need your comforting, thank you very much.  Now get out of my bed before I call Sam in here, and he plays shish kabob with your private parts.”

“Go ahead if you feel the need to, but I would never harm you, my love.”  He seemed nonplussed by my threats, and not needing any further motivation, I yelled at the top of my lungs.

“Sam!  Sam can you come in here please?  Like now!”  There was no response.  “What did you do to him?”

“Why, not a thing, I have only great respect for Samael. I would never harm him… unless I had to,” he cautioned.

“Then why…?  Sam?  Are you out there?”

“I believe he’s otherwise occupied.”  With a wave of his hand my bedroom wall disappeared and I could see Sam sitting on the couch, raptly watching the cartoon network with the sound turned all the way down, his shoulders shaking in silent laughter.  And that’s when I realized it was all a dream, I’d made it into the Ether and he’d pounced on the opportunity.  Relaxing a little, I gave him a shove which sent him a bit closer to the edge of the bed, but not much.

“How did you get in here?  Was my message the other day not clear enough?  I’m never having sex with you, so you can stop haunting my dreams and bothering my friends. I saw through you as soon as you opened your mouth.”

His mouth opened and closed without saying anything as he digested that last bit.  “I’m sorry, how do you mean?”

“That thing with Mitch.  I know it was you, and it didn’t work, so you can knock it off.  I’m sorry you’re trapped and you got the short end of the stick, but it has nothing to do with me.”

He began to laugh. “You are a delightful creature, such imagination!  Do you believe I came to you in the world and I let you… shoot me down?  I assure you, I do not give up so easily,” he leaned closer, stalking me like a panther.  The sheet slipped and I saw he wore white silk pajama bottoms, so sheer I could see through them, and I quickly looked away.  His voice soon commanded my attention as he loomed over me.  “I will never let you go, Merceline.  We are destined to be together, you and I.”

Panic flared, but an idea came to me.  Within moments, I pressed a sharp knife where it counted most and had the satisfaction of watching his eyes widen in surprise.  “Wanna bet?” I grinned in triumph and he halted in his advance, his voice strained.

“Where did that come from?”

“Are you kidding me?  I’ve seen every single Nightmare on Elm Street movie there is, including the remake.  You don’t have power over me here.  Now fuck off, or I’ll change your destiny in a way you’ve never imagined.”

Instead his body flexed and the knife disappeared from my fingers.  Azazael towered over me, forcing me back against the bed, his face blazing with anger.  “Do you think to threaten me, woman?”

“You can’t force me and you know it!  You need my love for it to work.”  I clung to the convention, hoping like hell it was true.

“What better way to procure your love than to fulfill your earthly desires.”  His lips descended upon mine and I turned my head away.  Undeterred, he pressed a kiss to my collarbone, slowly moving lower.  I shoved with all of my might but I couldn’t budge him one bit.  “Adamiel!” I screamed, willing him to join me in the nightmare with every fiber of my being.  Azazael froze for a moment, his head tilting to one side as he listened for something I couldn’t hear, but then the terrible grin returned to his face.  “Perhaps he has other pressing matters to attend to?  Don’t worry, my love, I will wipe all traces of Adamiel from your thoughts.  His head bent to my breast and I grabbed a handful of his long hair and pulled.  Hard.

“Get off of me!”  A flash of blinding white light erupted between us as my Grace finally kicked in.  I had barely enough time to wonder if it would work on an angel as I scrambled out from under him, but scant seconds later he was on me, shoving me against the wall and trapping me there with his body.

“Perhaps I have erred in my treatment of you.  Perhaps you need to be broken.”  Azazael grabbed a fistful of my hair and pulled my head back painfully, forcing me to look up at him.  “I know many delightful games, my love.  I will teach you to fear me and from that fear will come love.”

Utterly trapped, I tried to look around for anything that could be used as a weapon.  Even if I hit him again with my Grace, where would I go?  It was a cinch Sam wouldn’t hear us from the other room since he wasn’t really there in dreamland.  For whatever reason Adam wasn’t coming, I was completely on my own.  An idea came to me, it was risky as hell and I had no idea if it would work or not, but I was running out of options.

Another knife materialized in my hand and Azazael sneered.  “Silly little fool, I told you that won’t work on me here.”

“It’s not for you, it’s for me.”  I plunged the knife into my thigh in one swift movement.  Let me tell you, that’s harder than it sounds, when every survival instinct in your body is to avoid that kind of suffering.  The gamble paid off, and my cry of pain followed me into the real world as I awoke in my bed, my body covered in a sheen of sweat, the knife still clutched in my fingers as my leg bled all over my pristine, white sheets.

The same preservation factor made it hard to pull the knife out; all I wanted to do was will it away but no such luck, being back in reality.  It came out much slower than it went in, the shaking of my hand making it worse before it got better and the rush of fresh blood as I pulled it out was alarming.  With an effort I let go of the knife, my fingers stiff from gripping it so tightly and tried to muster enough Grace to heal my leg.  With a whimper I laid my hand above my thigh, but I couldn’t concentrate enough to focus the Grace.

Sam burst in to stare at me in shock and all I could think to do was scold him for coming in without knocking.  “You’re not supposed to be in here…”

“What have you done?”

“…without knocking.”  I fell back against the pillow weakly.  The pain was starting to fade, but I hadn’t done anything to heal the wound.  Dimly, I wondered if that was a bad thing.

Sam was quick to kneel beside the bed, laying his hands over my bleeding thigh.  “You were making strange sounds,” he murmured, his eyes slipping closed as he brought forth his Grace.

“I was having a nightmare.”  I couldn’t say anything else after that because the pain flared as my wound knit together at super speed, until he flopped on the end of the bed, satisfied with the result and we stared at each other, each trying to regain our breath for different reasons.

“Nightmares are bad?” he blinked, and I couldn’t help but give a shallow laugh.  I forgot he’d probably never had one since he didn’t ever sleep.

“Yeah, that was a bad one in particular.”

“I expect so,” he considered aloud.  “Perhaps you should not keep weapons in your bed if you are prone to nightmares?”

“It wasn’t here when I went to bed, I brought it with me from the Ether.”  I felt a little stronger and sat up higher in the bed.  My leg was all sticky with rapidly cooling blood, but my skin looked smooth and healthy when I peeked through the hole in my pants.  So much for those pajamas…

“That is most curious.  I have never heard of anything being brought across the planes like that before.” A furrow appeared on his brow as he puzzled through it.

“You said to be careful what I did in the Ether, right?  It might affect things here?  That was what I gambled on when I stabbed myself.”

“You stabbed yourself on purpose?”  His head canted to one side.

“Trust me, it was the lesser of two evils, the other being Azazael.  You were way off the mark about him by the way.  You said he wouldn’t force me, that he needed me to give him my love freely or something like that, didn’t you?”

“Yes, those are the conditions of the prophecy.”

“He must have forgotten to read the fine print, because he was all about the forcing.”  My scalp still felt sore from where he’d grabbed my hair and I rubbed at it absently.

“Azazael assaulted you?”  Sam lost all traces of the lovable innocence I was accustomed to, his blue eyes blazing with resolve as they had in the restaurant with Ubel.

“He tried to, but I got away with that knife trick.  Honestly?  I don’t think I’ll ever sleep again,” I sighed, tiredly.

Sam rose to his feet, no signs of fatigue in his stance.  “I am truly sorry, Mercy.  I underestimated the level of degradation to which he has fallen.  I had known him to be given to certain excesses, but I still labored under the assumption he was the brother I once knew.  I can no longer sit idly by while he places you in such torment.”  Whatever he had in mind it didn’t look pleasant from the look on his face.

“Wait, what are you going to do?”

“I can’t go where he is imprisoned, but since he has made the Ether his hunting ground, I will pursue him there and end this.”

It sounded good in theory, but why hadn’t he tried that before?  “Just like that?  How are you going to get him to stop?”

“It will not be easy,” his face clouded.  “I may be gone for some time, and I do not like leaving you unprotected.”

“Hey, I’d rather have you deal with Azazael, I can take care of myself here.”  At least I hoped so, but there hadn’t been an attack on the demon front for a little while.  “Do you want me to come with you? You know, as bait.”

I didn’t think he’d go for it, but Sam actually appeared to consider it.  “It will be difficult to find him in that plane without being called, but I do not wish to place you in danger.  Promise me you will be careful while I am gone.”

It was a relief not to confront Azazael again so soon, even with angelic back up.  I was still pretty shaken up about our last encounter.  “Yeah, of course.  I’ll stick to crowds and I’ll have Ben come pick me up after work tonight.”  Of course I still hadn’t talked to Ben after our last argument…

“Take care, Mercy.” Sam leaned down and pressed a chaste kiss to my forehead.  “I will not rest until I find him and make him pay for his treatment of you.”

“You take care too, Sam.” I caught his hand before he pulled away.  “He’s not playing fair, so you can’t count on any bond you might have had before.  Whatever he was before the fall, that guy is evil to the core now, so watch your back.”  Sam nodded, and with a last long look, he was gone.

There was no way in hell I’d get back to sleep that night, so I stumbled into the shower, washing away the last vestiges of the nightmare.  My bed wasn’t so easily taken care of though, and I was glad I had my own stackable washer and dryer and wouldn’t have to make the trip to the Laundromat to wash out all the blood.  By the time I got cleaned up and settled in on the couch, I noticed I had seven missed calls from the same unlisted number with no messages.  Having a good idea who might be on the other end, I dialed the number, not at all surprised when the line clicked open with no response.

“It’s me,” I spoke into the silence.  “You’re probably wondering what happened since I called you in the Ether, but… I don’t know, Adam.  You didn’t come.  I needed you and you weren’t there for me.”  My voice broke at that last as I remembered the panic I’d felt when I called his name.  “You might think you’re protecting me, but you blew it this time.  I was this close to being…” I swallowed, taking a deep breath as I tried to steady my nerves.

“I don’t know what this passive aggressive phone call that isn’t a phone call thing is about, but stop calling me if you don’t want to be a part of my life.  I need someone I can count on.  I need someone who puts me first every now and again in the real world.  Goodbye, Adam.”  I waited long seconds before I hung up, hoping against hope he’d say something, but there was nothing but dead air.  With a beep, I broke the connection, and I sat there, staring at nothing in particular until I saw the sun peek over the horizon outside my sliding glass door to the patio.

Wrapping my soft, fuzzy blanket around me, I stepped out onto the patio, Mimsy close on my heels, eager for a little outside time.  It was cold, bracingly so, but I welcomed it, I needed the breath of fresh air.  By the time I was ready to come in, I knew what I had to do.  Despite the early hour, I dialed the one person who’d been begging me to let him in the whole time and who I’d been resisting.  Ben answered on the second ring.

“Hey, are you still talking to me?”  There was a note of hope mixed with apology in my voice and I waited to see what kind of mood I’d find him in.

“Mercy, I didn’t think you were ever conscious at this hour of the day.”

Ben sounded guarded, and I couldn’t blame him.  He probably wondered what horrible thing I was going to tell him next.  “Yeah well, I’ve been up for so long this actually feels kind of like midday to me, so…”

“Long night, huh?”

“You don’t know the half of it,” I muttered, but that wasn’t what I wanted to talk to him about.  I was tired of always calling him with a ‘poor me’ story.  I realized I had no idea what was going on in his life right now except for the parts that revolved around me.  More than anything I wanted to get back to that place we’d been before all the craziness erupted.  That place where we were a normal guy and girl living normal lives and the only demons we wrestled with were personal ones.  “Look, the reason I’m calling is, I wanted to apologize for things.  I’ve been under a lot of stress lately and maybe I haven’t made the best decisions, but…”

“No, I shouldn’t have left like that, you were right, we should have talked it out,” he interrupted, and my heart swelled with happiness to hear him meet me half way.

“It’s a lot to deal with, I get that.  And even more than that, I should have told you everything a lot sooner and about Sam being here and… I’m sorry the way things turned out.  I’ve been thinking…” I paused, taking a deep breath before taking the plunge.  “I was thinking maybe you were right.  Maybe I should come and stay with you for a while, if the offer still stands.”

“Of course you can!”  The enthusiasm in his voice made me smile, I should have done it long before.  What was I letting hold me back from loving him?  “Do you want me to come and get you?”

“No, I can manage to get a few things together on my own and I’ll need my car to get to work tonight.  How about I come over after work?  Or is that too late?”

“No, I’ll wait up for you, no problem.  You know me, I can sleep in bits and pieces.  It’ll be good to see you again, Mercy, I’ve missed you.”

“I missed you too,” I replied, blinking rapidly through the swell of relief those words brought me.  Our relationship was strong enough to weather a few hiccups along the way and that knowledge made me feel something in short supply of late.  Safe.  “I’ll see you later tonight then.”

“See you then.  And Mercy, I’m so glad you came around.”

I was going to take control of my life even if it killed me.  Oh sure, I planned to stick to crowds at night like I’d promised, and hope that Sam could keep Azazael off my back at night so I could sleep someday again, but for the rest of it, I was tired of living in fear.  No more using my angelic gifts to stick my nose into other people’s lives like I had with Parker, and no more half conversations with Ben.  I was going for full disclosure from then on.  No more doomed fantasies about an angel that was out of reach by his design.  If Adam didn’t want to spend his life with me, I wasn’t going to wait around indefinitely in the hopes he might change his mind and throw me a bone.  I was ready to start the rest of my life with Ben and make a real commitment to him.

Only I never made it there.

Chapter Eight

I have to admit, I was a little wigged out at the thought of going out into the parking lot by myself after work without Sam around, I’d gotten pretty used to him there as my constant shadow.  I thought about asking Parker to walk me to my car, but Sharona was there hanging all over him, and I wasn’t going to stick my nose into that.  Instead I tried something new.  Waiting until I had a moment alone by the exit, I focused on making myself imperceptible.  While I had no idea if it worked on demons at all, it somehow felt safer having people walk right by without taking any notice of me.  I slipped out the door, growing bolder with each step when nothing jumped out of the shadows at me.

With a whispered prayer, I started the engine, patting the dash affectionately as the little car roared to life.  Maybe things were turning in my favor?  I sang along with the radio on the way to Ben’s, looking forward to making things up to him in more ways than one.  Worrying about Azazael trying to force himself into my life by possessing Ben was a stupid fear.  I wasn’t going to give up sex for the rest of my life just because of that possibility, was I?  I’d be able to tell it was Ben, we had too many shared experiences for Azazael to impersonate him with any kind of accuracy.  Maybe we could even work out some kind of signal, so I could always know it was him?

I had to park down the street since someone was already in his extra parking spot and I didn’t have the clicker thing for the garage door.  I admit, as I fiddled with the keys, I did have a few moments of trepidation as I fumbled with the lock.  The second I found the right key, I scooted inside.

“Hey, Ben?”  Ben’s townhouse was three levels, with the garage on the ground floor, the living room in the middle and two bedrooms on the top floor.  I set the deadbolt and turned the alarm system on right behind me out of habit, I knew he was big on home security, probably normal for a cop.

So you can understand my surprise when I heard the disembodied voice.

“Nice to get you alone for once, Lovey.”

I froze halfway through the darkened garage.  Had someone been lying in wait for me the whole time?  “Whoever that is, I’m not alone.  My boyfriend’s right upstairs and he’s a cop.  So you’d better do yourself a favor and take off right now before he hears you.”  Two figures stepped out of the shadows.  I mean they literally stepped out of the shadows, as in; there hadn’t been anybody there a second ago.

One was scruffy with jaundiced eyes that bulged slightly out of his thin face, his friend was a good deal shorter and huskier, long stringy hair hanging greasily from his scalp.  Neither of them looked like they’d ever spent much time in the dentist’s chair.  In easier times I might have mistaken them for a couple of dirty, homeless guys, but there and then, I knew they were far more dangerous from the lack of auras.

“Wasn’t talkin’ ‘bout no copper,” the shorter one laughed thickly.  “But we can have a dance with him first if you’d rather.”  He started for the stairs and I called out as loud as I dared to stop him.

“Wait!  What do you want?”  It was fairly certain that whatever it was, it wouldn’t be good.

“We got to collect you for the Master, miss,” the tall one gave what I imagined passed for a pleasant smile among demons.

“Collect me…”

“Too right, he was most explicit you wasn’t to be harmed.”

“Unless you was to put up a bit of a struggle,” the shorter added, “then we was allowed to have a little taste.”  He looked very, very interested in that possibility, probably because I was already starting to glow softly as my Grace keyed in to my distress.

“A taste, but we ain’t allowed to harm her much, Hubie.”

“Is that you, Mercy?”  Ben’s voice sounded from above and I looked up the stairwell, torn between relief and fear at hearing him so close.

“Yeah, I’ll be right up,” I called out before lowering my voice again.  “Look, I don’t want any trouble.  It’s real nice of you to come all this way to bring your master’s invitation,  but now is not a good time for me to go anywhere.”

Hubie’s smile widened in anticipation of my refusal.  “Oh, I’m sorry, were you under the impression that we was askin’?  She’s a cool one, ain’t she, Bert?  Butter wouldn’t melt in her mouth.”

“Too right,” Bert chuckled as his companion shuffled a step closer, and then another.  “Try and understand, miss, we hold you in the highest regard.”

“That is a fact,” Hubie nodded, continuing his advance, even as I backed toward the stairs, the glow brightening against my futile attempts to smother it.  There was no telling what might happen if I accidentally gave them a blast of my Grace.  To hear it told, the Grace is absolutely delicious to minor imps and demons.  It might possibly trigger a feeding frenzy, and between the two of them, I might not survive it, orders from the Master or not.  “But we mean to take ya, there ain’t nothing else for it.  Now, you do your shiny best to cooperate, or we’ll have to pay a visit upstairs before we go.  You don’t want to bring the copper into it, do you?”

“Leave Ben out of this,” I hissed, the Grace flaring brighter and I tried to work up a good head of righteous anger to try and tamp it down.

“Makes no difference to us whether he lives or dies, poppet.  The choice is up to you.” Hubie scratched at his lank scalp furiously, and it started to make me itch just watching him.

“Who are you talking to, hon?” Ben called down, sounding a little closer.

“I’ll be right up!” I called out frantically, trying to figure out how the hell I was going to keep him out of it without having to go with those two.  “Sa…” I opened my mouth to call for Samael, but a filthy hand clapped over my face before I could get the rest of the word out.

“Sorry, miss, but we can’t be allowin’ ya to call for no help, particularly of the angelic variety.”  Bert looked almost apologetic as he held me still.

“Look-see here, poppet.”  Hubie pushed his way into my face, his breath strong enough to make me gag.  “You come with us real quiet like, or I’ll have m’self a good look at his innards before we go.  But we is going, ain’t we?” he nodded and I nodded with him, my eyes wide.  I had no idea how I’d get out of it, but I couldn’t risk Ben getting hurt, and I couldn’t use my Grace against them.  Hell, I had no idea if Sam would even come if I did call, he was busy chasing after Azazael in the Ether.  And Adam… yeah, there was no use in calling for him anymore.

“Grand.  Let’s be off then, shall we?”  Bert eased his hold on me, ruined teeth showing as he smiled.

“What about Ben?  I can’t leave without talking to him. At least let me go on up and say goodbye, smooth things over.”

“No time to keep the Master waiting.” Hubie grabbed my arm, propelling me forward. I threw up my hands to brace myself as he strolled right up to the darkest corner of the garage and we passed through the wall, out into the night air.  That solved the answer of how they’d gotten in there in the first place.

“Where are you taking me exactly?”  I looked up longingly at Ben’s windows above that blazed with light, wondering how he’d take it when I didn’t come up those stairs.  Would he freak out with worry, or would it be the final straw for him?  For us?

“To see the Master.”  The pair exchanged looks, as if they thought I was a bit slow between the ears. I grit my teeth against the expletive that rose to my lips, determined to play nice, all the better to… ah, who was I kidding?  I had no kind of plan.  But it seemed better to play along and hope a chance to escape presented itself.

“Yes, but where is this master of yours?  I mean, does he have a house on the Sound?  Are we descending through a crack in the Earth into the fiery pits of Hell?” I prompted them, but they were short on details as they led me to a black Lincoln Continental parked up the street.

“You’ll see soon enough, miss.  But you’ll like Midian, it’s wonnerful fun there, just you wait and see.”

Hubie immediately smacked his buddy upside the head with a growl.  “Runnin’ at the mouth’s apt to get you into a heap of trouble.  Best you see to it before I see to it for ya.”

“Sorry, Hubie.” Properly chastised, Bert focused on shoving me into the front seat of the car to sit between them.  Even with a fairly spacious seat it was closer than I wanted to get to either of them and I tried to make myself as small as possible. Conversation fell to a bit of a lull then, as they argued on the best way to get there.  Not knowing where they were taking me, I wasn’t able to contribute much to the discussion, but I paid close attention so I’d know my way home should the opportunity present itself.

Hubie took us to a seedy part of the city, and I regretted the fact that I still wore my outfit from work.  If we had to get out and walk for any distance there was way too much skin visible than I was comfortable with, even with my coat on.  Then again, what could happen to me when I was with a couple of demons?  They’d been charged with delivering me safely, I figured I had very little to worry about until I was delivered.  Hubie though, apparently hadn’t given up hope I’d offer a bit of resistance so he could have his ‘taste’.

“You sure you don’t wanna make a run for it, lovey?  Last chance at open ground for a bit,” he grinned as we stepped out of the car in the parking lot for a strip club, ‘The Honey Pot’ emblazoned across the front in flickering neon.

“Are you kidding?  How did you know I love this place?” I quipped, looking up at the entrance dubiously.  A regular human being leaned against the front façade, letting out a long plume of smoke.  His aura was a virulent red, pitted with dark splotches.  I had zero desire to get anywhere near him, but I didn’t see as how I had much choice.

Bert had a puzzled expression on his face at my reply.  “Yeah?”

“Naw, she’s bammin’ us, Bert.  Let’s go then, girlie,” Hubie grumbled at being denied his bit of sport, grabbing hold of my arm and shoving me ahead of him.  The guy at the front door looked us over with interest but didn’t say anything as we passed by.

Have you ever seen those movies with strip clubs in them?  There’s always a well lit runway down the middle and a pretty, topless girl in her early twenties is twirling athletically on a pole right up front while college guys and sad, lonely old men wave at her with dollar bills, right?  This place was nothing like that.

There was a strip down the middle built of linoleum covered plywood and a completely nude girl who looked like she was barely eighteen gyrated on her back, a bored look on her face as she waved her legs in the air, the track marks on her arms plainly visible.  The look in her eyes was one of the saddest things I’ve ever seen.  They were lifeless, like there was nobody home, she had completely divorced herself from her body.  Who knows, I might have done the same thing in her place.  I sure as hell wouldn’t have wanted to work in a place like that unless I was stoned out of my mind.  The sex on display wasn’t limited to the stage, topless waitresses were the rule, most of them not exactly… in the first flower of youth.

In addition to the women serving drinks, there were a couple of nearly nude girls that I was willing to bet were employees, grinding against men in their seats.  I’ve never been a prude when it comes to sex, but there was nothing sexy about watching those guys get off right there out in the open and seeing the exchange of money. I had to wonder, how did a place like that stay open?

Out of the corner of my eye I thought I saw… my head swiveled around to get another glance because it looked almost like… In the end I decided I must have been mistaken, because personally, I don’t believe vampires actually exist.

There was a demon behind the bar though and he nodded as we passed by, looking at me with undisguised hunger.  Was I that delectable looking on sight, or did my reputation precede me?

The guys hustled me through the bar past a door in the back and down a flight of stairs that led to a warren of rooms.  I didn’t have to be a genius to guess what was happening down there, and again I was almost glad for my demon escort, as it was the last place I wanted to be on my own.  At the end of the hallway was a door marked ‘private’, and we didn’t stop, once more passing right through the door to the passageway on the other side.  There was little in the way of lighting in the dark, cramped space, and I immediately began to feel claustrophobic.

“I can’t see where we’re going,” I complained, but the guys didn’t seem to particularly care, and I got the impression there wasn’t much to see anyway.  With Hubie prompting me along, we continued on our way.  I couldn’t be sure, but it felt like we were going lower, until the light started to grow brighter up ahead and we came to a dead end, the natural rock emanating a faint orange glow.

There was a strange, falling sensation as we stepped through the rock, like when your stomach drops on a roller coaster, but it stopped as soon as my foot connected with solid ground on the other side.  The light was brighter there and we stood in another corridor, the rough hewn, cave-like walls showing we were underground.  An enormous man blocked the path, his eyes shining balefully in the unearthly light.  He wore pants made from supple brown leather, his brawny torso bare except for the intricate tattoos and the heavy bronze necklace that covered the top part of his chest.  Matching bands of metal encircled his wrists.   No aura shone from his soul, marking him a demon, and his expression didn’t give me a whole hell of a lot of hope he was the friendly type.  Essentially, he scared the hell out of me and I hoped he wasn’t the Master.

“Hullo, Naberios,” Bert called out cheerily.  “Look what we brung back.”  The guardian’s eyes raked me over from head to toe, but all he did was grunt in reply.  For a moment I thought he wasn’t going to let us pass, but then he stepped aside, giving us room to squeeze by his considerable bulk.  As I passed by, he leaned forward, sniffing me with interest, and I hurried by as quickly as I could manage, not wanting him to decide he deserved a ‘taste’.

“I reckon he likes you,” Hubie chortled once we’d past, and I wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or a bad thing.

“Is he um, always there?” I asked with a nervous glance over my shoulder.  If so, it would make sneaking out of there all that much more difficult.

“Yeah, he don’t get out much, poor bloke,” Bert nodded.  “But then again, he ain’t exactly the social type, as you might say, so I imagine it suits him fine.”

The passageway grew lighter and it turned steadily warmer as we continued on, I fancied we were walking uphill after a while.  Finally, I had to discard my heavy, winter coat, I was sweating like crazy in the close quarters and I set it down in the corridor with a pang of regret.  I loved that coat.

“Is it much farther?”  They ignored my question and I went a couple of minutes before I tried again.  “Seriously, is it?  Because you guys could have told me to wear more comfortable shoes, my feet are killing me.”  Maybe it wasn’t wise to antagonize them, but I’d had a long day at work before getting kidnapped and tromping through miles of corridor to God knew where, and my mood wasn’t exactly the best.

“Maybe we should kosh her on the head?  She’d be easier to manage that way,” Bert whispered and Hubie was quick to give him a smack.

“Then we’d have to carry her the rest of the way, use your head.  Course, then we’d have an excuse to sample a bit of her wares, for the strength to carry on y’see,” he smiled broadly.

“No koshing!” I interrupted. “I’m good, I can walk just fine.”  I hurried my pace, wanting to get out of the damn corridors since I figured demons might not be all that big on self control.  It was a surprise when we came out of the tunnel into the open air and I caught sight of our surroundings.  We were definitely not in Kansas anymore.  Or anything resembling the world I knew.

The sky above was a mottled, mauvey-purple color, the barren landscape below a sea of jagged, rusty brown rocks and dirt.  A slightly unpleasant scent permeated the air, not quite sulfur or brimstone like I expected for a hell type dimension, but definitely off.  Like cheap new car smell on a hot, summer day.  There were no buildings or cities, it felt like I was in the middle of the desert and I have to admit, apart from feeling a little like I’d wandered onto the set of an old Star Trek episode, it was a little disappointing.  “Where is everybody?”

“Around,” Hubie barked and Bert was a little more helpful.

“They’s mostly underground.  When it’s full on daytime it’s awful bright and most of our lot prefers it a bit more cozy like, beneath the palace.”

“We’re going to a palace?” I blinked, that sounded promising.  It seemed odd that a demon realm or whatever they called it would have such a limitation, and I understood why they kept most of the city out of sight.  I opened my mouth to ask another question, but let out a shriek instead as something big and dark buzzed low by my head before taking off into the night sky so fast I couldn’t see much of it beyond the glow of beady red eyes, a mouthful of needlelike teeth and dark leathery wings.  “What was that?”

“Oh, that’s a morfran, ugly buggars,” Hubie spat on the ground.  “Wouldn’t let ‘em get too close to you, miss, they especially likes to chew on soft delicacies like you.”

“I’ll remember that,” I mumbled, my eyes on the skies.  For the rest of the walk I kept imagining I heard the beating of those leathery wings, but no more creatures made a pass at me, for which I was incredibly grateful.  But then the palace came into view and I forgot to worry about morfrans or hungry demons as the sheer size of it took my breath away.  The immense palace had been hewn out of the side of a snow topped mountain range that stretched as far as the eye could see.

“Stop gawking, girly, Raum don’t like to be kept waitin’,” Hubie grumbled, giving me a good shove and I stumbled forward on exhausted feet.

“Then this Raum shoulda sent a dune buggy to come and meet us,” I grumbled right back.  Why should I be happy about getting dragged halfway across the barren wasteland of hell to meet a demon lord who wanted to keep me as his own personal room service?  We completed the rest of the journey in silence, the palace looming up ahead commanding my full attention the closer we got to it.  The design reminded me of a Greek or Roman temple with all the columns and detailed stonework, but I’d never seen anything on that scale before.

The tallest, most ornate balconies I could see were easily thirty floors up, but the lower levels had little more than roughly hewn windows set in the rock.  Super.  That meant we were probably going to have to climb a crapload of stairs since it was a cinch there were no elevators in hell.  Once we got inside, the temperature dropped considerably and I wished I had my coat back.  But that couldn’t be helped, and I sure wasn’t going to go back for it.

It felt like there were a hundred pairs of eyes staring at me as we came in out of the muggy, night air, though there was no one in sight to begin with.  But the deeper we got into the main entry hall, the more glimpses I got of demons of every conceivable shape and size.  Some were dark and specter-like, as though they were made of shadows and little else; some were scaly with horns and glowing eyes and lots of teeth, scarier than anything I’d ever seen in a movie.  Some could definitely pass for human, like the ones I’d met in my neighborhood, but all of them had the one thing in common that marked them as demons - they didn’t have a soul.  Peppered among the demon folk I spotted regular humans, their auras muted and dim but still there.  None of them looked up to meet my gaze.  Eyes downcast, they shuffled along their way looking miserable and broken.

It turned out I didn’t have to worry about the stairs at all, because a sedan chair waited for me as soon as we reached the end of the main entry hall.  Soft, snowy white, fur pelts were tucked around me as I took my place, and I was grateful for the warmth even if the attention made me feel like I was on display.  Like Cleopatra, I was borne on the shoulders of human slaves.  Unlike the Egyptian queen, I didn’t recline on my chair eating peeled grapes, I sat perched on the edge of it, my nerves strung as tight as a drum.  Higher and higher we climbed, and it grew progressively colder the more elevated we got.  I forgot all about the cold as we reached a huge open air courtyard at what I imagined was the apex of the compound.

Huge stone columns delineated the space, though they held nothing up but the violet sky.  A great throne of carved stone sat on the center of a huge dais, the steps flanked on both sides by guards wearing metal jewelry similar to the guy who’d been guarding the gate.  All along the sides of the open hall, demons lined up in varying degrees of finery and I imagined they were courtiers of a sort.  It was the demon lord’s court after all, they were probably minor demon nobility, if such a thing existed.  They watched me with open interest and not a small amount of hunger as I was brought to the front of the hall, and any thoughts I had of escape were rapidly disintegrating.  Far more disturbing was the sight of other humans in the court, some bedraggled in rags and some in elegant finery, down to their jeweled collars.  Chained like pets.  None of them looked up at me either, utterly beaten down, their eyes were glazed over with pain and despair.

They set the sedan chair down in front of the empty throne and helped me down.  The chair was taken away and I turned a slow circle, having no idea if I was supposed to say or do something.  As if an unspoken signal was given, the entire demon congregation sank to their knees and pressed their foreheads to the stone floor.  A low chant rolled through the room, each demon adding its voice to it and it took me a few seconds to make out what they were saying.  The chant grew in volume along with the speed of my pulse as they called for their master.  “Raum, Raum, Raum, Raum…”

Chapter Nine

I’m not sure what I expected for the demon lord’s appearance.  A great big, red skinned devil with huge horns like in Legend, or maybe even a scaly monster with a mouth full of razor, sharp teeth?  Maybe he’d appear in a puff of smoke, or with an entourage and a fanfare of trumpets?  But Raum was just suddenly there, reclining on his throne with one leg hooked over the arm, his dark eyes trained on me.  He looked like a normal guy, closely cropped hair and vaguely Roman features; his slim build wasn’t especially imposing, nor was the expression of interest on his face.

Raum rose to his feet, striding in my direction.  “Yes, yes, yes, you can dispense with the formalities,” he waved to the court and the chanting stopped.  “Now then, let’s see what you’ve brought me,” his hands rubbed together in anticipation as he approached me.  I held very still, not quite knowing what to expect.  Close up I could see his eyes were completely dark, similar to the imp, Cephas, which was a little creepy.  But when he smiled, his teeth were as human as mine.  “Lovely.  Simply lovely,” he nodded in approval, and I guessed I’d passed the first round of tests.

“We brung her like you wanted, my lord.”  Hubie approached then, with shuffling steps.  “Snuck her right out from under you-know-who’s nose.”

“Excellent work boys, you shall be rewarded, indeed,” Raum grinned, in high spirits as he looked me over.  “We’ll talk terms later,” he waved them away.

“Actually, your highness, we was hopin’ we could have a little…” Hubie started in, but Raum swung his dark gaze in annoyance, quelling the flow of words with a single glance.  “…later is just grand, my lord,” he bowed, shuffling backwards, pulling Bert with him. I was almost sad to see them go, they represented my only link to normalcy, to returning to my world, wherever that was in relation to the demon’s realm.

I cleared my throat, smiling nervously as Raum turned back to look at me.  “What is this place?” I dared to ask, but he didn’t seem to mind my question.  In fact, he looked almost friendly.

“This is my palace.  Do you like it, my lady?”  He held his arms wide, his smile returning.  His voice had an odd accent to it, and it reminded me a little of every bad guy in every movie from the seventies.  You know what I’m talking about, the vague British accent they always stick on sci-fi and fantasy movies?  It had an odd lilt to it that wasn’t quite British though, as though English wasn’t his native tongue, but he managed it beautifully.  Much better than Ubel who had chewed his way through the language, and much more refined than the Bobsey twins who picked me up.

“No, I mean what is this place?  Is this Hell?”

“Why, are you feeling tormented?” he grinned.

“No, but…” My eyes went to the humans in the room, they sure looked tormented.  “I’m not exactly sure how we got here.”

“Slipped through the rabbit hole, did you?”  His tone turned almost sympathetic and he clucked his tongue.  “I imagine it must be a bit confusing, my dear, but we’ve plenty of time to sort it all out.”  That didn’t sound promising.  “Now then, let’s see what you can do,” he prompted briskly and I stared back at him helplessly.

What I could do.  Was he looking for a new dancing monkey for his menagerie?  “I could mix you a mean margarita but you seem to be out of tequila, so you’re gonna have to be more specific.”

“Maybe we can try that later, but for now, my lady, we require a demonstration of your power.  A taste if you will.”

A taste.  Super.  He took a step closer to me and I took a half step backwards instinctively, maintaining that cushion of distance.  Despite his friendly demeanor, I had a feeling I wouldn’t like being too close to him once he lost his temper.  “I’m not sure what you’re looking for.  I’m not what you would call powerful by your standards, I’m sure.”  The crowd tittered with laughter at that, and I wondered what I’d said that was so funny.

Raum snapped his fingers and two guards materialized behind me (and I mean materialized, not as in hustled over, but materialized out of thin air), the top of my head level with their shoulders.  I halted my retreat even as Raum continued to advance slowly.  “There are all kinds of power, my lady.  I am not lacking in that arena as you can plainly see, and you would do well to remember that.  Now then… what do you have to offer me?”  There was menace in those black eyes that belied the easy smile, and unconsciously I backed up again, my shoulders colliding with the broad chest of the guard behind me.  Picking up on my fear, my hands started to glow slightly and the courtiers ooh’d and ah’d appreciatively.

Raum stepped closer, his face very near mine. I tried to squirm to the side but the guards grabbed hold of me, rooting me in place.  I didn’t know if he planned to kiss me or take a bite out of me, when his head dipped to the side to sniff delicately at my neck and the Grace suffused my body, glowing brighter.  “Oh yes, you’ll do nicely.”  His lips brushed against my throat where my pulse thumped madly.  “Nicely indeed.”

“Please… please don’t.”  I’m not sure what I was asking him not to do specifically, I only knew I didn’t want whatever came next.  To my utter surprise, he backed off, the easy smile reappearing on his lips.

“Too right,” he nodded.  “Some things are better left in private where they can be savored.”  I did not like the sound of that…  “In the meantime, where are my manners?  Can I offer you refreshment?   Wine?”  With a little wave of his fingers, a tray appeared in front of me, laden with a goblet of wine and a ruby red apple.

“No, thank you.”  The last thing I wanted was to get drunk on demon wine, and I wasn’t keen on trying anything associated with original sin.

“Tea?  Decaf soy latte?  Twinkies?”  Another wiggle of his fingers and the contents of the tray shifted to display the modern fare.

Maybe it was cocktail hour in Demonland, but I wasn’t feeling peckish.  “No, I’m good, thanks.  I’m still set on Pacific Standard Time so it’s a bit late for me.”  That was a lie. I’d been known to get off work and head to Lolly’s for pancakes and bacon in the wee hours of the morning and slept like a baby afterwards.

“Of course,” he nodded equably.  “Perhaps we’ll find something to tempt you later.  In the meantime, send for the witch!”  The food and drink vanished into thin air and Raum spun on his heel, returning to his throne.  A few seconds later, the crowd parted, giving wide berth to the slender woman who approached.  She was slight of build, beautiful, dressed in a simple shift, feet bare.  Her most striking feature was flowing, white hair that reached her waist, held back by a thin band of braided leather.

Though she was very pale, she didn’t have that chalky, albino look about her, more like a person who never spent a moment in the sun.  Her aura shone a golden yellow, bright for a human, but not as dazzling as an angel.  She reached the foot of the throne and stared straight ahead, looking at nothing.

“Oriana, my Dove.  Thank you for joining us.”  Raum leaned forward, snatching up her hands and pressing a kiss to the inside of each wrist.  The woman gave the slightest of flinches at the contact, but her face remained blank and devoid of emotion.  “I can’t wait to see what you think of my new acquisition.  Step forward, Merceline, the two of you should become fast friends.”

I had a friend or two that dabbled in witchcraft, mostly tree-hugging, fluffy, Wiccan types.  Harmless really, so the word witch didn’t scare me away.  I stepped up to stand opposite her, a hesitant smile for a fellow prisoner I guessed.  She continued to stare straight ahead, a furrow appearing on her smooth brow.

“I can’t see you,” she gasped, her voice barely above a whisper.  Was she blind?  It explained the sightless stare.  Raum however frowned over her proclamation.

“Of course you can, sweets, she’s standing right there before you.  Try again.”  There was an edge to his voice and I wondered what he expected her to see.  Her eyes gained their focus, and I practically felt them sweep over my features.

“You’re not in the pattern, just a jumble of threads connected to nothing.”

“Everything is in the pattern, sometimes it makes a new pattern is all,” Raum laughed nervously.

“She shines, like a pretty ornament, but inside is a hall of mirrors with twists and turns.  Get lost, you spend too long there…”  Oriana’s voice took on a sing song quality as she stared at me, swaying lightly on her feet.  Her lips quirked into a smile then, a high trilling laugh spilling from her lips.  “She won’t let you in, too many others in there already.”

I wasn’t sure if I should be offended at that or not since I had no idea what the hell she was talking about, but I knew enough to know I didn’t want to become a permanent part of his court the way she was, trotted out on special occasions.  Ignoring the pale witch, I focused on the demon lord. “Um, yeah… look, I’m not sure what you expected to happen by bringing me here, but there are people watching out for me back home.  They’ll start to wonder where I am and then it’s only a matter of time before they come looking for me.  So, why don’t you tell me what you want, and we can go from there, figure out what happens next?”

Raum’s brow was furrowed, deep in thought as he stared at Oriana and his gaze flicked towards me in annoyance at my interruption.  “I wouldn’t worry overmuch on that score, I’m quite capable of holding on to what’s mine.  You’d best get used to the notion that there is no ‘next’ for you.  This is it.” He gestured to the court, leaning forward to regard me with eyes, black as pitch.  “No one is coming to save you.  You exist to serve me, to satisfy me, cater to my every whim.  Please me, and I may decide to let you live.  Anger me, and… well, I shall leave that to your imagination,” his lips quirked into an obscene version of a smile.

My mouth went dry at the threat, and I swallowed past it, any glib response falling right out of my head.  I could do it.  I could play along until I saw my shot, and for the moment, I went with the first coherent thought that came to my mind.  What would please him?  Sinking to my knees, I pressed my forehead to the cold stones as I’d seen the courtiers do.  “Forgive me, I am yours, Lord Raum,” I said gravely.  Okay, it was a bit melodramaculous, but I had the idea he was pretty heavily into the theatrical.  I wasn’t wrong, as the sound of his gloating laughter filled the hall, and I felt a rush of relief as he bent to lift me from my prostrated position.

“Come then, my lady.  We shall see to your comforts, the better that you shall see to mine.”

I rose, a meek expression as I could manage on my face.  Darting a look to Oriana, I saw her watching me carefully, a puzzled look on her face.  Damn.  If she suspected my heart wasn’t in my performance, I hoped she’d keep it to herself.  “As you wish,” I nodded, watching him warily through downcast lashes.

“Nelo!” he bellowed, and I jumped in spite of myself.  “Where is that worthless, good for nothing… Oh, there you are.  Finally, I almost had to wait,” he scowled.

The little imp Nelo stepped out of the space behind the stone throne.   Only coming up to about waist height on me, he was small and dark, his skin absorbing the light rather than reflecting it, giving him a slightly indistinct, shifting appearance, as if he was made up entirely of shadows.  Tendrils of darkness writhed around his feet, obscuring them from view, making it seem as if he glided rather than walked.  His eyes were a startlingly clear amber color, and they blinked up at Raum as he cringed away from the anger in the lord’s voice.

“Apologies, Master.  How may I be of service,” he spoke in perfect English, his words precise and crisp.  He sounded more like a butler than a little demonic creature.

“Show your mistress to her apartments, I trust they are suitably prepared?”

“Of course, Master.  All is in readiness, we merely await your command,” Nelo bowed low.

Raum turned his attention back to me, capturing my hand and bringing it up to his lips for a kiss to the top of my fingers.  “Rest now, my lady.  I will come to you later and you may prove your true worth.”  Unable to do more than nod uncomfortably, I gave a passing bob of a curtsey (finally, years of watching regency movies paid off!), and pulled my hand out of his cool grasp the second I was able to.

“Follow me if you please, Mistress.”

Any thought I had of giving the little guy the slip was quashed when the two burly guards followed after us, flanking me on each side.  Well, what had I expected?  I was silent as I followed along, trying to memorize the path we took, but I soon ended up turned around, as it seemed like we doubled back after a few inexplicable course changes.  We arrived a few minutes later at my ‘apartments’.  Predictably the guards remained outside and I took great pleasure in slamming the big wooden door in their faces.   “Oh, sorry.  I think the wind caught the door…” I gave a helpless shrug to Nelo who stood watching me, just inside the sitting room.

The room was well appointed, like something I imagined from a luxury suite in a theme hotel in Las Vegas with the high ceilings and carved stone detail everywhere.  Only it wasn’t built out of plywood and Formica, it was the real deal with rich tapestries hanging on the walls and thick woven carpets on the polished stone floor.

“Here is your sitting room, Mistress,” he said unnecessarily, taking me on a guided tour.  “The balcony has a lovely view of the plains at dusk should you choose to enjoy it.  Through here is your bed chamber.”

I nodded appropriately, almost expecting him to pause with his hand out for a tip when he finished.  “What about a um… do you people have indoor plumbing?”

“Plumbing?” he stared at me blankly.

Charming.  “Nevermind, I’ll figure it out,” I muttered.  Hopefully I wouldn’t be there long enough for it to become an issue.

“The bathing chamber is through there, I can have a bath prepared for you very quickly should you wish to bathe.  Shall I call for hot water?”

“Get naked in the middle of demon central?  No thanks,” I gave him a tight smile.

“Are you hungry, Mistress?” he asked politely.

“Nope.  And I don’t want my hair braided or a pedicure or a bedtime story, thanks for asking,” I added before he could ply me with the next question.  He blinked those big amber eyes at me and I regretted the sharp tone.  “Sorry, it’s been a rough day.”

“I can well imagine.  Then I shall take my leave of you, Mistress.  With your permission of course,” he gave a little bow.

Could he imagine?  Somehow I doubted it.  “Actually there is something you can do for me.  Tell me a little about this place.  Midian?  Is that what it’s called?”

“If I can,” he nodded readily and I got the impression he wasn’t all that eager to leave and return to his normal duties, whatever they may be.  I guess if I was in his shoes I’d rather sit around and chat instead of fetch and carry for a boss like Raum too.  “Yes, this place is called Midian, it is our home.”

“What are those other humans doing here?  They sure looked like they were being tormented for their sins.  How did they get here?”

“They are poor souls who allowed themselves to be captured by our kind.  Each is enslaved to the demon that stole them away from the world.”

Like me, I supposed.  “What will happen to them?  Is this a hell dimension?  Are they paying for their sins?”

“Nothing so productive, Mistress.  Midian exists apart from Heaven and Hell.  Those humans trapped here will never ascend to Heaven nor reach judgment day in the fires of hell.  My kind feeds on the souls of man.  The humans you saw will either be trapped here forever without hope of salvation, or be killed should they outlive their usefulness, but there is no everlasting life for them.”  I imagined I heard pity in his voice, an odd position for a demon to take by my reckoning.

“So, you’re eating their souls?  And they’re trapped for ever and ever?”  I sank down on the edge of the bed, grateful for the support or I would have ended up in a puddle in the middle of the floor.  “Is that what Raum has planned for me?”  The little demon didn’t meet my gaze and I guess I got my answer from that response.    “I think I’d like to lie down for a bit if you don’t mind.”

“As you wish, Mistress,” Nelo bowed low, backing towards the door.

Once I was left alone, I checked out the place from top to bottom, looking for any other exits I might have missed, basically anything that could be used in my favor when Raum came to pay me a visit.  Unfortunately, the place was pretty sparse.  Other than the sumptuous décor, there were few personal items to be found.

The view from the balcony made me dizzy when I got too close to the railing, there was no chance in hell I could try and climb down the thirty levels to the ground below.  There might come a time when I was desperate enough to tie the knotted bed sheets together to try and reach the level below, but I wasn’t there yet.  For the time being, I was a guest of the demon lord, and there wasn’t a whole hell of a lot I could do about it.

Lying down on the bed, I closed my eyes, convinced I’d never be able to fall asleep with everything going on or I’d immediately get pounced on by Azazael in the Ether the moment I slipped past consciousness.  Instead, I fell into a deep and dreamless sleep almost the instant my head hit the pillow.

* * *

It’s hard to say what time of day it was when I awoke.  The sky was a lighter purple but there was no sun visible in the sky.  The air had warmed up considerably, but as I sat up higher, I saw that was probably because of the firepit thing at the foot of my bed.  (I have a friend in the SCA who could probably give the object its correct name, but firepit thing was good enough for me)

My gilded cage looked much the same as it had the night before, the lit fire the only sign that anyone had been in there since I’d fallen asleep.  Except for… the ornately wrapped box on the dressing table.  Large enough to hold a new coat (which I hoped for), it sat wrapped in shiny, gold wrapping paper with red and green ribbons, and a huge bow in the center.

I approached the box cautiously, after all, what might pass for a gift in a demon realm?  Curiosity got the better of me though, and I carefully peeled open the wrapping paper and lifted the lid of the box.  Nestled inside was a pretty dress in a deep red that reminded me of a Grecian style.  Golden sandals designed to lace up the calves were in the bottom of the box, as well as several smaller velvet lined cases filled with jewelry dripping with rubies.  My first reaction was to swap out my work clothes for the lovely dress, but my hands froze a few inches above the box.  What would I accept if I said yes to Raum’s gifts?  Would it mark me as his in some way?  Because I so wasn’t his, regardless of what I’d said in the throne room the night before.

I was wondering how to ring for room service when the door opened, and Nelo arrived, bearing a covered tray, right on cue.  “Forgive my impertinence, Mistress, I thought you might be hungry now.”

“No, you’re right on target with that one, Nelo.  Thanks,” I smiled at the little guy, my mouth watering as he uncovered the tray to reveal an attractively arranged assortment of sliced meat, cheese and fruits.  Too hungry to care if he’d slipped anything into the food, I made myself a sandwich, wishing he’d brought mustard, but that was too much to hope for, I supposed.  It wasn’t until after I swallowed the first bite that I thought to worry what kind of meat I was eating.  That only slowed me down for a tick though, I was too ravenous to question a meal.

Nelo fussed around the room as I ate, making the bed, straightening things.  “You did not like your gift?” he asked, picking up the wrapping paper.

“I like it alright,” I answered noncommittally.

“Do you need assistance in dressing?  I could send for a maid…”

“No thanks, I’ll stick to my own clothes for now.”

“You refuse my lord’s offerings?”

He seemed surprised, and I nodded, popping a grape into my mouth.  “You guessed it, buddy.”

“Nelo.”

“Huh?”

“My name is Nelo, but you may address me as buddy if you wish, Mistress.”  He bowed low again and I waved him up.

“You don’t have to keep bowing when it’s just us in here, Nelo.”

“As you wish, Mistress,” he bowed again and I suppressed the urge to roll my eyes.

“You don’t have to call me Mistress either.”

“As you wish, Mistress,” he bowed again, but I thought that time he might be smiling.  Feeling fuller, I slid my plate towards him.

“Are you hungry?  You can have the rest of my sandwich if you want.”

“No, Mistress, that would not be proper.”

“Not proper?  I’m not gonna eat it, it’ll be garbage if you don’t take it.”  I waved a thin slice of meat in the air and his eyes followed it before he shook his head again.

“No, thank you, Mistress.”

“Suit yourself,” I shrugged.  “Hey, does this happen a lot?  Girls get kidnapped, you wait on them hand and foot, and Raum plies them with fancy gifts?”

“Oh no.” Another shake of the head was given. “Usually they die right away unless my lord takes a fancy to them.”

“That’s comforting,” I muttered.

“It is?”

“No, Nelo.  It’s called sarcasm.”  It was almost as bad as talking to Sam...  “What about Oriana?  It looks like she’s been here a long, long time.”

“She…” Nelo fell silent, his eyes dropping to study the stone floor and I was at a loss for why until the door swung open again, and in sauntered Raum, wearing a burgundy smoking jacket over black, silk pajama pants.

“Did you miss me?”

Chapter Ten

“You’re not wearing my gifts,” Raum frowned.  With a snap of his fingers, I was dressed from head to toe in his finery, like an instant makeover, including elaborately styled hair, jewelry and makeup.  It would have been a pretty cool effect, unless I dwelled on the fact that he could snap his fingers at any time and leave me without a stitch on…  “There, that’s more pleasing.  Don’t you think, my lady?”

“You’re a man of many talents,” I murmured, a little dizzy from the rapid transformation.

“That will be all, Nelo.” He gave a distracted wave and Nelo popped out of view.  I missed the little guy instantly, the last thing I wanted was to be alone with Raum.  “Now then, it’s time for us to get to know each other properly.”

“Would you like some wine?”  I backed up towards the table, refilling the goblet from my leftover meal.

“You’re not a tease, are you?” he shook his head, a tsk, tsk, tsk sound coming from his lips.  “Actually, strike that, I enjoy a good tease every now and again,” he grinned, stalking me slowly, in no apparent hurry.

Super, a psycho with plenty of time to burn.  How would he try to fill the hours?  “What do you want from me exactly?”  I asked, fighting the urge to back away again.  It wasn’t like I could escape him if he decided to pounce.  “I know your kind feeds on the Grace.  Are you going to eat me?”

“You Americans are so blunt, I love it!” Raum gave a short bark of laughter.  “Yes, Mercy, I do intend to taste your Grace.  It’s a rare and lovely treat for one of my kind, and have no fear, I don’t intend to squander it.”

“Meaning…?”

“Meaning we’re going to become very good friends because you’re going to be here a very, very long time.”

My chin came up a little, refusing to be cowed by the threat.  “I wasn’t kidding before, there are people who will come looking for me.  Adamiel, Samael.” I wasn’t above dropping a few names but he seemed unconcerned.

“No one can find you here, my lady.  You are quite removed from the world.”

“No one?”  I wasn’t sure if I could take him at his word or not, but some of the starch went out of my sails.

“Let me put it into terms you can understand, pet.  We’re off the grid.  Where angels fear to tread and devils never follow.”

As far as I knew, angels weren’t afraid of much and I didn’t think it’d keep Azazael from forgetting his dreams of freedom either.  “I’m not so sure about that, there are a lot of people looking out for me on both sides of the fence.”

“Never find you here,” he shook his head.

“What if I call them?”

“Won’t do you any good, m’lovely.  Even if they could get past the gate, no angel will set foot on Midian, so you’d best give that thought up.”

“Why not?”

“Shall I show you what we do with angels, my lady?”  He closed the distance between us, pressing me up against the wall.  “Now then… give us a little taste.”

No demon had ever looked at me as though he appreciated my feminine charms, it was all about the Grace, so I was surprised to find him so invasively into my personal space.  As he pressed into me, I could feel that there were parts of him that were very interested in another kind of hunger though, and that filled me with a different kind of fear.  The Grace bubbled up to protect me, unwittingly making it worse as I started to glow and he pressed harder.  “Yes… that’s it…lovely,” he whispered, nuzzling in close to my neck.

I squirmed away from his touch but he held me there easily enough, his hand forcing mine to lie over his heart.  “Do it,” he growled against my skin, squeezing my wrist painfully, but I didn’t have enough control to push the power on command.

“I can’t, I don’t know how,” I whimpered, trying with every fiber of my being to shoot him with the damned stuff so he’d be happy and let me go.  A snarl tore free from his throat and I felt him clamp down on my shoulder, his suddenly sharp teeth piercing my flesh.  I screamed in pain, and a surge of Grace burst out of my hand, suffusing his chest with white light.  Raum’s bite on my shoulder intensified as his body stiffened against mine, his mouth pulsing rhythmically against my torn flesh as he absorbed the power with a groan of pleasure.

Just when I thought I couldn’t take it any longer, his mouth eased up and the white hot agony subsided to a dull throbbing pain, which lessened under the raspy touch of his tongue on the wound.  I kept my gaze resolutely turned away as I got a hold of myself, refusing to look at him or what he’d done to me.  Raum continued to lazily lap at my shoulder, and I have to admit, it didn’t hurt anymore.  I was too chicken to see if that was because it was magically better, or if there was a numbing agent in his saliva that masked the pain.

“This is going to be a long and fruitful partnership,” he said finally, pushing away from the wall with a twinkle in his eye.

“How is this a partnership?”  It was impossible to disguise the loathing in my voice as I slipped out from his grasp.  “You feeding off of me isn’t a partnership, it’s all take and no give.”  My hand went to the wound to cautiously probe it, finding the skin completely smooth and unbroken.  Thank God for small favors.  Idly I wondered, if I started to pray, would God hear me in Midian?  Or was I removed from His eyes as well?

“Give it time, m’lovely.  It won’t always have to hurt like that as you gain control over your gifts.  Soon you’ll come to appreciate the benefits to accepting me as your lord and master.  Might could sweeten the deal a bit, make it more pleasurable for the both of us.”  Raum leaned close again, reaching up to stroke my cheek and I turned away, swallowing back a wave of revulsion.

“I’ll pass, thanks,” I managed to get out, and his hold shifted to close around my throat, forcing me to look at him.

“It doesn’t always have to hurt, but it can.  I can take your Grace in all manner of ways, pet.  Best you remember that, before you reject my more than generous offer.”  He released his hold on me, fingers brushing against the trail of tears that spilled from the corner of my eyes and bringing them to his lips.  “So sweet,” he smiled, licking the tears from his fingers like they were nectar.  “Think about what I said, Mercy.  I think we could have a lot of fun together, you and I.  But if not… well, that’s enjoyable too, isn’t it?”  Raum smiled, his teeth stretched to wicked points and my shoulder ached just from looking at them.  Without waiting for a response, he turned and left, whistling a jaunty tune.

* * *

I felt dirty after the incident, but the prospect of stripping down to wash was unappealing.  A quick check in the mirror showed my shoulder was smooth and unblemished.  There wasn’t any trace of blood on the dress, it was almost as if it hadn’t happened at all.  Besides scaring me and the pain during the actual bite itself, he hadn’t done any lasting harm.  So why did I feel like weeping?

Nelo showed up a little while later, but I didn’t feel like talking or even being seen.  Drawing the heavy bed curtains closed, I lay back on the bed, tears flowing while I tried to figure out how in the hell I was going to get out of it before Raum decided he wanted to take our ‘partnership’ to the next level.

An hour later, I had nothing.  If it was true that Midian was somehow shielded from the rest of the world, Sam or Adam might not have any idea what happened to me.  As far as Ben knew, I vanished into thin air from his garage, he wouldn’t be able to offer any help.  I hadn’t visited the Ether the night before, and I wasn’t sure if that was because I’d been too tired to dream, or if I was actually blocked from getting there in Midian.  That was something, at least I wasn’t getting attacked on two fronts.

If I called for Adam, would he even hear me?  Or would he be too afraid to come for me, as Raum implied?  “Adamiel…”  His name slipped from my lips like a prayer, and I felt stronger for saying it.  “Adamiel, please come, I need you.”  When Adam did choose to show up, he always came fairly quickly in the past, but I’d never tried calling him from another plane of existence before either.  Closing my eyes, I focused on the faint link between us, that tendril of a bond I’d gotten used to since the gift of his Grace.  I could feel Adam out there somewhere, but he felt far, even farther than before.  “Ugh, this is ridiculous.  Even if I call him, he probably won’t come,” I sighed into the empty room.  Unless… unless I didn’t give him a moment’s peace until he came to rescue me.

Have you ever played that name game?  You know, say your name is Matt, it goes Matt, Matt bo-batt, banana fanna fo-fatt, fee fi mo-matt, Ma-att.  In my defense, I wasn’t sure what else to try.  Hey, desperate times call for desperate measures, right?  Well, I tried it with Adam’s true name.  Over and over again.  Adamiel, Adamiel bo-badamiel… and so on, until it became a mindless rhythm in my mind, one round of it flowing seamlessly to the next, pausing only to breathe.  I’m sure if Nelo was still around out there, he probably thought I’d gone completely bonkers, and hey, maybe I had.

The tune had long since fallen out of the song and become more of a chant when I felt a rush of air stir the curtains.  My heart swelled in greeting a half second before I heard his familiar voice, like a caress.  “You called?”

“Adam!”  I pushed aside the bed curtains, half afraid it was a trick, but there he stood, looking good enough to eat in a pair of jeans and a slim fitting black t-shirt.

“I’d say that’s my name, don’t wear it out, but wait… you already did that.”

“You really came…”  Maybe I was a little out of it from my emotional storm, but I couldn’t remember any of the reasons why I was mad at him in that instant, I was so glad to see him.  But then he opened his mouth and I remembered.

“You do get that it’s dangerous for me to be down here, right?”  There was a generous helping of annoyance delivered with that sarcasm, and I felt my temper flare.

“Oh and it’s not for me?” My voice rose incredulously.  “Do you not get the concept that Raum wants to eat me?  Slowly, over time.”

“Yeah, exactly.  Slowly.  You’re in no real danger for a while, have a drink and try to go with it for now.  Me, on the other hand, if they catch me down here I’m toast.”

“Try and go with it?”  I couldn’t believe he said that to me, how could I have been so far off base about his feelings for me?  Was I confusing his gift of Grace for love?  “Then why did you bother to come down here at all?”  My eyes narrowed suspiciously.

“To get a little peace and quiet.  Promise me you’ll let up on the nursery rhymes, will you?”

“I can’t believe I’m hearing this.  You risked coming down here to get me to stop calling you?  That’s it?  You’re not taking me with you?”

“Take you with me?  Why would I do that?  This is the best thing that could have happened to you.  No one can get a line on you when you’re down here, not from either side.  You’re safer here than you would be back in the world with the Five-Oh.”

I sank back onto the bed, the strength gone out of my legs.  “You aren’t seriously going to leave me down here, are you?”

“Just for a little while longer while I work on a few things, you’ll be fine.” A careless shrug was given.  “You look great by the way.”  His eyes traveled appreciatively up and down my body, still clad in the red, Grecian dress, with all the jewelry Raum dressed me in.

“That’s all you have to say to me?”

“What do you want me to say?” he stared at me blankly and I felt something break inside of me.

“You know what?  Forget it.  If you don’t know, there’s nothing I can say to clue you in about it.”  He either cared or he didn’t, I wasn’t going to beg.

“Jesus, Mercy, don’t you think you’re making a big thing out of this?  I mean look at this place, it doesn’t seem so bad.”  Adam tugged on the bed curtains.

“Doesn’t seem so bad?”  Do you have any idea what I’ve been through lately?  I needed you and you weren’t there for me.”

“And yet you came through it just fine.  You don’t give yourself enough credit, Mercy.”  He seemed almost proud of that fact, but I took no enjoyment in it.  Maybe it was even true, but it didn’t change the fact that I couldn’t count on him.  Not that I expected to be the center of his universe, but you don’t tell a girl you’ll come whenever she calls and then switch it off without ruffling a few feathers.

“Where were you, Adam?  I called for you and you were a complete no-show.  You heard me, didn’t you?  Not only now when I made it unbearable for you, but you heard me before, right?”

“Contrary to popular belief, I don’t sit around waiting to come to the rescue, you know.  I have other things that put certain demands on my time, but now that I’m here…” he scooted closer to the bed and I recognized that look.

“You don’t even care, do you?”  Oh, I was livid!  I wanted to wipe that smirk off his face, and I settled for shoving against his chest as I pushed past him, needing a little space between us.  “You don’t care that Azazael tried to rape me, or the fact that I had to stab myself to get out of the Ether when he decided to try and ‘break’ me.”

Adam’s expression grew thunderous, all traces of amusement gone from his face.  “He what?”

I wasn’t sure which part he was confused about and I was too upset to care.  “Or that Raum used me as his own personal chew toy when he fed off me, do you?  I guess it’s fine as long as it doesn’t leave a scar and I still look pretty for you, huh?  As long as I’m quiet and out of the way, you’re happy.”  I worked myself up into a good lather, the tears falling in earnest as I started to feel sorry for myself all over again.

“Mercy…” he chased after me, and I let him catch me because as much as I didn’t want to look at him, part of me wanted him to comfort me very much.  “Come here.”  His strong arms wrapped around me and I leaned into his chest, simultaneously loving and hating how easily his embrace soothed me.  “I’m sorry, I didn’t know… You never said he…” his throat worked as he swallowed, jaw clenching.  “You always sound so strong, I thought you had it under control.”

“You heard me then?”  My head came up in surprise.  Although I’d suspected it was him on the other side of those phone calls, it was gratifying to find out he cared enough to reach out to me.

“Do you always pour your heart out like that to total strangers?” The ghost of a smile flickered across his face.

“Why didn’t you ever say anything then?”  We were close, closer than we’d been in a long time, I didn’t think the Ether counted.  His eyes raked over my face and I could see the indecision warring within him.

“‘Cause I’m an idiot,” he admitted, whatever barrier he’d erected against the idea of ‘us’ crashing under the temptation.  His lips descended over mine hungrily, like a starving man set before a banquet.  I kissed him back for all I was worth, those weeks of separation falling away the moment his lips touched mine.  Alone in the night I could tell myself I didn’t need Adam in my life, but with the man himself there, it was a little harder to stick to.

It was different kissing him, the bond between us stronger, maybe from his gift of Grace, or maybe it was something else.  All I knew was I dreaded the moment it would end, because I knew each time we parted it would be harder to say goodbye.  So I concentrated on making a memory to last me through those times when we’d be apart, savoring every touch of his hands , every brush of his lips, every breath that mingled with mine until finally he pulled away, pressing his forehead to mine.

“I hate to say this, but…”

“You have to go,” I nodded slowly, but neither of us moved to part just yet.  “You can’t keep doing this to me.”

“I know,” he sighed, fingers tracing the curve of my jaw.

“I have a life.  I have a boyfriend.”  Inside I dared him to challenge me about it, claim me as his, but his face darkened.

“I know.”

Disappointed, I pushed a little harder.  “You can’t expect me to wait around for you forever, taking whatever crumbs you toss my way when you feel like it.”  But I would, I knew that about myself and I felt like shit for it, because it wasn’t fair to Ben and it wasn’t fair to me.

“I know.”

A furrow appeared on his brow and I wasn’t sure he was even listening to me anymore.  “Will you stop saying you know?  Can’t you give me something to hold onto?  Some kind of hope?  Or is this it?  You’re leaving me here until you’re good and ready and when you do take me out of this place things go back to the way they were?  You in whatever forsaken corner of the world you’re holed up in and me…”

“Shut up for a minute, I’m thinking,” he muttered absently and my eyes closed as I tried to reign in my temper.  Sweet Jesus, why did I bother?  “You said Raum bit you before, why was that?  His kind doesn’t crave the taste of flesh.”

I blinked at the sudden subject change, my argument losing a bit of steam.  “He didn’t take a bite out of me to chew on, he bit down on me, to make me hit him with the Grace.”

“Why didn’t you let him have it?  Why did you let him hurt you?” Adam frowned, his fingers pushing aside my hair to check for damage along my neck and shoulders.

“Why did I let him hurt me?”  I couldn’t help but roll my eyes over that one.  “Um gee, let me think… maybe because I don’t know how to perform on command?  I’ve only done it a few times before and it seemed to flow naturally, but this time it wouldn’t come.”

“Okay then, let’s see what we have to work with.”  Taking a step back, he picked up my hand and laid it over my heart.  “Come on, hit me here.”

“Are you high?” I tried to snatch my hand away, but he held it fast.

“Don’t worry, you won’t hurt me.”

“Why not?  It seemed to slow Azazael up.”  Not for long, but I did have the impression it hadn’t been a good thing.

“You hit him, huh?  That’s my girl,” he grinned.  Oh yeah, there was definitely pride in his voice.  “Don’t worry though, I can take it.  I’m more interested in getting you to learn a little control before I leave you here.”

“I don’t want to hurt you.”  I wasn’t even sure I could.  I wasn’t afraid of him and that seemed to be the only thing that triggered it.

“Are you sure?  I kind of deserve it,” he taunted.

“I can think of better ways to punish you.” I gave him an arch smile, unable to resist that teasing grin.

“As tempting as that sounds, let’s try and focus on giving you some manner of protection.”

“I can’t hit you with it, I told you, I can’t control it.”

“Do you need me to be scary?  Is that it?  I could come after you.” He stepped closer, eyes flashing in what I assume was supposed to be a menacing manner, but it made me giggle.

“It doesn’t work like that, I’m not afraid of you.”

“No?  What about now?”  In one deft movement, Adam pinned me against the bed with his body.  “The last time I did this, you lit up like a Christmas tree.”

“That was a long time ago.” My hands slid up and around his body, enjoying the play of muscles under his shirt.  “Now I don’t mind so much.”

“I bet I can do something else to make you glow…”

Chapter Eleven

The lesson forgotten, his lips pressed against mine, begging entrance.  I was no better, forgetting the fact that Raum could come back at any time, and the danger he risked with every second he lingered.  Or maybe that made it all that much sexier as we made out like there was no tomorrow.  His hands skimmed all over my body, leaving all manner of interesting tingles in their wake.  As I opened my eyes, I saw he was right, I was glowing faintly, but not from fear.

“Does that always happen?”  I murmured, noticing the faint nimbus of light that surrounded him as well.

“I have no idea, I never made it with another angel before,” he grinned, studying his hand with interest.  “I have to say, I feel a little…”

“What?”  I prompted, but he shook his head.  “Do you think the same thing would happen if I kissed Sam?”

“Have you been thinking about kissing Sam lately?” he pulled back, a disgruntled look on his face.

“Well, you’ve been gone an awful long time…” I couldn’t resist a little tease, but it was too hard to maintain my expression, so I let him off the hook.  “No, you’re the only one I think about kissing when I shouldn’t be,” I sighed.  “I wonder what would happen if we…”

“Time to get back on track,” he cleared his throat, rolling off of me.  I got the sense that he deliberately tried to distract himself so as not to think about that with the bed in such close proximity.  “Let’s try something else.  Here, sit up and close your eyes.”  He pulled me up to a sitting position and knelt on the ground before me.

“Close my eyes?” I frowned, wanting to see him for as long as he was there, but I did as he asked.  “Okay, now what?”

“Now focus on the Grace, can you feel it inside you?”  Adam laid a hand over my heart.

“I feel something,” I sighed, not at all sure it was the Grace when he touched me like that.  His chuckle was warm and intimate, his voice falling in pitch.

“This is just like healing, you can focus the Grace through your hand.  Concentrate on doing that right now, push the power to your hand, you don’t need to be afraid to do that, right?”

I nodded, gathering the Grace in the palm of my hand where I could feel its warmth even though I couldn’t see it.  “Now what?”

“Now, instead of directing it into someone, keep building it bigger and stronger… good, just like that.” I heard the approval in his voice.  “Picture a big glowing ball of energy, like a fireball.”

Doing as he asked, my hand started to feel unpleasantly hot and tingly, and a fine sheen of sweat broke out across my brow.  “How long do I have to do this for?  It’s… heavy.”  Maybe that was the wrong word, but I couldn’t think of a more appropriate one.

“Good, now I want you to push it out of your hand like you’re shoving at something solid like a bowling ball, ready?  On the count of three.  One, two, three… push!”

Oddly enough, the visual worked for me and I felt the Grace leave my hand with a measure of relief.  Relief that was short lived as I heard his groan and my eyes popped open.  “Oh God, I forgot you were right there in the line of fire!  Are you alright?”

“Never better,” he grunted, falling to sit against the edge of the bed on the floor.

“I’m sorry…”

“Forget it, it’s fine.  It’s what I told you to do, right?  See, I’m already feeling better.”

“Yeah, you look great,” I frowned over his pale complexion.  “Can I maybe…” I laid my hand over his heart, looking to heal him this time.

“No, you save your strength, I’ll be alright in a couple of minutes.  You shouldn’t do that too often in one day, it’ll wear you out.”  He laid his hand over mine, trapping it against his heart and I was reminded of the Grace he’d given me before we parted the last time.

“Why did you give me some of yours then?  That was more than a simple healing or a ball of power like I just did.  It felt like you gave me part of yourself.”

“It was the only way I could think of to stay close to you,” he shrugged as if that made perfect sense.

“Won’t that get you into trouble with the guys upstairs?”

“Nah, they already know you’ve got Sam’s Grace, what’s a little more?  With any luck they won’t even notice.”  It seemed a bit risky to me, but I had to admit I was touched by the gesture.

“Does it really make you feel closer to me?”

Adam pressed a kiss to the center of my palm.  “You don’t?”

“Sure I do, but I’m the one who got the Grace.  It feels like… like a warm hug sometimes.”

A roll of the eyes was given.  “I think I’m gonna pretend I didn’t hear you say that.”

“Oh, like you’re too cool to admit you need a hug every now and then?  What does it feel like for you then?  And choose your words carefully, if you say something disgusting I’ll blast you again.”

A myriad of expressions flitted across his face and I could tell he was thinking of and discarding a few cutting quips.  But then his face softened, and he wrapped an arm around my waist.  “It feels like, if I close my eyes I can almost imagine you lying there beside me at night.  I can almost smell your hair on my pillow and hear the way you snuffle in your sleep,” he smiled softly, for once devoid of his trademark smirk.

It was a vivid enough picture for my mind to supply the other half of it.  What he would look like stretched out in my bed, the sheets covering him just barely.  “How would you know what I sound like when I sleep?”  I asked suddenly, seizing upon that single detail.

“You don’t know how many times I’ve watched you sleep,” he shook his head.

“Not at all creepy,” I laughed, sobering when I saw he was absolutely serious.  “Why didn’t you ever visit me when I was conscious?  If I was on your mind so much the whole time we’ve been apart… I mean, who are you trying to fool?  If anyone was paying attention, who would be able to tell the difference if you were in there watching me sleep or with me in bed for Pete’s sake?”

Adam pointed skyward.  “Think of it like Santa Claus.  They see you when you’re sleeping, they know when you’re awake.”

“Eewh.”

“Tell me about it.  Only if they happen to be looking of course, but I knew they were keeping an eye on you, so it seemed simpler to stay away.  You sure made it hard though.”

“Me?  What did I do?”  I was the one who’d been left behind.

“Do you have any idea what it’s like to watch you go home with that bozo night after night?”

“Ben?”

“Was there another bozo I missed?” he replied sourly.

“What do you want me to say?  You left me, remember?  You acted like you were never coming back again.  You didn’t return my calls, on the phone or otherwise.  What was I supposed to do?”

“Wait in celibacy, saving yourself for the off chance we might one day reunite?”  He gave me a cheesy grin and I laughed with him, because it was almost true.  Maybe I’d continued to date Ben, but I’d been saving my heart on just such a fantasy.

“Does it seem as if that’s likely?”  I asked earnestly, willing him silently to truly answer me once and for all, because I could wait, if I knew there was something to wait for.

Adam was silent for long seconds, weighing his answer carefully, judging by the look on his face.  “I’m working on it.”

“Working on what exactly?”

He shook his head, “I can’t go into it right now, but Mercy, you get that this isn’t how I want things to be, right?”  I wanted to believe him, but he kept leaving me so often!  “If it was up to me, I’d take you out of here, hole up with you for a year or ten in a little place on the beach in Fiji until things settle down, and we can see where things go from there.”

“Fiji?  Why Fiji?”

“You would prefer Iceland?  I’m open to suggestions, but I’m thinking I’d rather see you in a bikini than a parka.”

“I don’t care where we go as long as we’re together.”  There, I came out and said it.  No more games or taunts, Adam was the one I wanted, heart and soul.

“I want that too,” he said gently, linking his fingers through mine.  “But right this moment it’s not safe for us to do that, even beyond the things that you already know about.  I’m not saying it’ll never happen, but it’ll take some time.”

There were worse things than the drama I was already going through?  Something told me I didn’t want to know about them.  “Time as in human time or angel time?”  I already figured out they measured time in much longer spans than us little people did.  Patience had never been one of my virtues but I was willing to give it a shot.

“I don’t want to promise you something and have it fall through.  If you decide you can’t wait for me… that’ll suck, but I’ll understand.”  Adam swallowed uncomfortably as if he tasted something sour.  “Actually no, I’ll just have to fight for you when the time comes, that’s all.”  He looked happier with that decision and I gave him a faint smile of my own.

“Sam said you can come visit me in the Ether and no one would ever know, is that true?”  If it was, it seemed like the perfect compromise.  That way we could still see each other every night.  Hell, I’d start taking naps during the day…

“Hmm, I’ll have to think about that one.  It could be risky, but… maybe we could make it work.  You can’t get there from here, so we’ve got some time to work the details out.  It’s a good idea though.”  He gave my fingers a squeeze.

“Maybe we should come up with a code word, so I’ll know it’s you.”

“Why wouldn’t it be me?” his brows drew together in confusion.

“Because Azazael is out there, and that seems to be the way he likes to get at me the most.  How hard would it be for him to appear as you and get what he wants?”

“Good point.  Okay then, my safeword is Belgium.”

“As in waffles?”

“That’s Belgian.”

“Whatever.”  Vaguely aware of what ‘safeword’ was used for, it put all manner of interesting images in my mind that I wish hadn’t crept in there in the first place.  “I don’t even want to know where that comes from.”

Adam placed a chaste kiss to the crown of my head, pushing himself up to his feet with his usual vigor, and I assumed he was fully recovered from my burst of Grace.  “Well, enough of the pillow talk. I’d better motor before someone notices there’s a bonus on the demon buffet line.”

Scrambling to my feet, I followed him to the balcony where he cautiously peeked out at the skies overhead.  “How did you get in here by the way?  I though it was impossible to get by the gate guard?”  Naberios, or whatever his name was, scared the crap out of me, and I was under the impression that angels couldn’t make themselves imperceptible to demons.

“Nobby owed me a favor so he let me pass.  It’s getting back out that’s gonna be the tricky part,” he grimaced.  “Come here and give me one for the road, I’m gonna need it.”  Adam pulled me into his arms, kissing me tenderly, almost reverently before crushing me to his chest for one last embrace.

“I love you,” I murmured into his chest, feeling his arms tighten around me almost imperceptibly when he heard the words.

“I know.” He gave a long slow sigh.  “Now stay put or I’ll kill you myself.”  His voice rough with emotion, Adam launched himself off the balcony, wings unfurling to catch the air.  I watched him grow smaller and smaller in the distance before he vanished from sight, considering his last words.

I knew I should stay put and wait for Adam to figure out how to keep me protected.  I should hope that Sam would be able to handle Azazael and somehow get word to me when it was safe to come home.  I should trust all my friends and family to understand if I disappeared for a while, and be there waiting for me with open arms when I got back (not to mention my job).  I should be patient, and use the time in Midian to gain a little control over my abilities.

Yeah, none of that happened.

* * *

After another deep and dreamless night’s rest, I woke up to find the white haired witch standing next to my bed, gazing down at me in puzzlement.  I’d seen the same expression on Sam’s face a dozen times since he moved in with me, so maybe that’s why I didn’t jump halfway across the room when I found her there.  “Something I can help you with?” I asked, keeping very, very still.  Raum called her a witch, and she was an odd one at that, so I wasn’t quite sure what to expect from her.

“How can you sleep with so many pieces jumbled inside of you?”

“I beg your pardon?” I blinked.

“They’re all swirling inside, part of you, but not.  Doesn’t it get awfully crowded?”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about, but um, is that why you came to see me?”  I looked for any sign of Nelo, but he was nowhere to be found.  Was it strange that I craved a demon’s company to make me feel safe from a human?

“Oh, I nearly forgot!” She clapped her hands together with delight.  “I found you!”

“I didn’t know I was lost…”

“You made a new pattern, and it’s all snarled and tangled, but I found you all the same,” she beamed happily.

“Um, good…?”

“I thought you might like to have cakes and tea with me.”  Oriana held her hands out entreatingly and I found myself thinking she was a few cakes short of a picnic.  Then again, maybe she was a little lonely?

“Yeah sure, cakes and tea it is.  Just let me wake up and wash my face, alright?”

“I could braid your hair if you like?”

Oh yeah, she was lonely.  “Maybe later,” I hedged, ducking out of the room to go wash up.  She was waiting in the exact same spot when I came out of the washroom, I’m not even sure she blinked the entire time I was gone.  When I approached, her gaze remained unfocused, with the same thousand yard stare that originally made me think she was blind.  I wasn’t sure if I should say something, or wave my hand in front of her eyes or what.  All at once she snapped out of it, face lighting up with a cheerful smile.

“Shall we go then?”

“Go?”  Somehow I’d thought we’d be eating cakes and tea in my room.  Wasn’t I a captive?

“Yes, to my quarters.  Unless you’d prefer to eat here?  Your terrace is much larger than mine, but I do share the same view.”

“No, out is fine,” I amended quickly.  Better than fine, I was eager to get out of my luxurious prison.  It turned out we didn’t go all that far, Oriana’s room was down the hall from mine, and she did have a very similar set up, only a little smaller.  Or maybe it only felt smaller because it was so crammed full of knick knacks and odd curios.  “How long have you been here?”

Her brow twitched with uncertainty.  “I hardly know.  Time moves differently here,” she replied, moving out to her terrace which was covered with a jungle of plants, some of which I recognized, and some completely alien.

“Differently how?”  Oriana shrugged her narrow shoulders, and I came to understand that was all the answer I was going to get as she went to the railing.  “Don’t you want to try and get home?”

“Home?”  Her eyes remained fixed on the horizon.  “This is my home now.  Raum is a generous master when he is well pleased, you would do well to give him what he wants.”

Ugh, was that what the impromptu social gathering was about?  “Sorry, honey, I’m not about to drink the Kool-Aid, so you can save your breath.  I could care less if Raum is well pleased.”

“You should care, your safety depends on it,” she said sadly, and I wondered if she was speaking from personal experience, or concern for my wellbeing.  “Isn’t that right, Nelo?”  I glanced around, but I didn’t see the little demon anywhere.  “You needn’t hide, I won’t tell him you came to pay me a visit.”  There was still no sign of Nelo, but then he stepped out of a shadow that could not have conceivably hidden him from view.

“Jesus Christ, how long have you been standing there?” I gaped at him, trying to reconcile how he could have fit into the space.  He was small, but not that small.

“Raum bade me watch over you, I was merely heeding his wishes,” he replied, a guilty cast to his face.

“Wait… does that mean you’ve been watching me in my room as well?  Without me seeing you?”

Nelo hung his head in shame, “Yes, Mistress.”

“But how…”

“Obfuscation is a talent of his kind,” Oriana explained, as if I understood what the hell she was talking about.  “But he can’t hide from my sight.”

A flare of panic went through me as I realized what that meant.  “Then you saw…”  Adam.  Which meant Raum would know I had a visitor, if he didn’t already.

“You disrobe?  No, Mistress,” Nelo interrupted me, “I would never invade your privacy in that way.”

Holy crap, the little guy was keeping mum over it!  “You’d just invade it every other way?” I smirked to keep from smiling broadly over our shared secret.  Whether or not I could trust him remained to be seen, but it felt nice to have at least one ally in my corner.

“Apologies, Mistress, shall I announce myself when I am in your presence?”

“That’d be nice, Nelo.  I don’t like surprises.”

“I love surprises!  They happen so rarely.”  Oriana clapped her hands together like a small child.  The rest of the afternoon passed like that, with odd outbursts from the girl at random times.  It made for a strange conversation that was hard to follow, and I rose to make my escape as soon as it was reasonably polite to do so.

“Thanks for having me over, we’ll have to do this again sometime,” I smiled faintly.

“So soon?”  Oriana laid a hand over mine, her eyes taking on a faraway cast.  “Don’t trust him.  He isn’t what he seems.”  A flicker of pain crossed her features.  “He’ll draw you down to ruination if you allow him to.”

“What?” I breathed, more than a little creeped out by the proclamation.  “Are you talking about Raum?  Don’t worry, I don’t trust him any farther than I can throw him.”  Her hand slipped from mine and Oriana gave no sign that she was aware she’d said anything at all.  In fact, she ignored my last reply as well.

“I do hope you’ll join me for tea again soon, I had a lovely time,” she smiled brightly.

“Yeah, can’t wait,” I nodded, more than a little relieved when Nelo escorted me back to my rooms.  “Has she always been like that, or did she go a little batty after she got here?”  I asked as soon as we stepped into my sitting room.

“How do you mean… batty?” he blinked up at me.

“You know, a few bricks short of a load?  Spacey.  Like she’s there with you one moment, then gone the next, and back again like there’s nothing wrong?  What was she going on about?  I can’t trust him.  Him who?”  Did she mean Adam?  Could I end up Fallen when I’d never been a real angel to start with, just by association?  Or did she mean Azazael?

“Oh, you’ll get used to Oriana’s visions, they strike at odd times, it’s true.”

“Will I…” I wasn’t so sure I wanted to stick around long enough to get used to any of it.  “Hey, thanks for not ratting me out about you know what, I appreciate it.”

“She might already know, you never can tell with Oriana.”

Not exactly a pleasant thought, but there was little I could do about it.  I was more interested in his ability to hide himself from sight.  “Were you there the whole time Adam was here?”

Nelo had the good grace to look a little embarrassed.  “I am responsible for you, Mistress.  My lord bade me not to let you out of my sight, and apart from certain moments of privacy, I have fulfilled my duty.”

“How did you do that?  I didn’t see you in the room.  Have you always been able to do that trick with the shadows?”

“Yes, it is a mark of my kind.  We exist as part of the shadow and can step into them.”

“Can all demons do that?”

“To some degree all can blend in, but some of us are more adept at it than others.”  To demonstrate, Nelo stepped close to a thin ribbon of shadow cast by the dressing table in my bedroom and slipped into the impossibly narrow space, disappearing completely from sight.

“Get outta town…” I murmured, impressed.

“I cannot leave you, Mistress.”  Nelo poked his head out of the shadow.

“No, I didn’t mean…”  He sorta reminded me of Sam, being so literal minded, and he seemed to have a hit and miss relationship with human references.  “Hey, does it work on other demons too?  Do you disappear from their view too?  Or can they spot you like Oriana did?”

“I can conceal myself from all eyes, Oriana ‘sees’ me with her other senses.”

“That’s gotta come in handy.”  Particularly with the way he was treated.  As if he guessed my train of thought, he gave a sad shake of the head.

“Apart from Raum, he always knows when I am present.”

“But you can move through the palace unseen as long as Raum or Oriana aren’t around?”

“Yes, and I can step through the shadows.”

“Step through the shadows?”

Nelo nodded, demonstrating by slipping back into the narrow strip of shadow completely, and then popping his head out of the shadow of the bedside table across the room.  “Like this.”

“That’s pretty… wow.”  An idea began to form in the back of my mind, but I wasn’t sure he’d go for it.  “Could you bring a person with you through the shadows like that?”  If I could get him to take me unseen though the palace and back to the real world, I’d have it made in the shade.

“Yes, I think I could.  Why?  Do you wish to hide from Raum?  He would undoubtedly find you, Mistress, and his wrath would be… I would not willingly subject you to it.”

“I was thinking of something a little more permanent.  As in, you helping me break outta here.”

“It can’t be done, Mistress.” His face clouded with alarm bordering on panic, as if Raum would somehow know we were talking about it.  “I can’t step you through the shadows from Midian to the world.  We have to pass through the gate, same as anyone else.”

“But you could take me through the shadows to get out of the palace, right?”

“Well… yes, but…”

“And then you could hide me as we passed by the gate guard, right?”  I prompted, my eyes shining with excitement.

“It would never work, Naberios is ever vigilant.  He would never let us pass and there are no shadows near the gate itself.”

“Oh, come on, you’re telling me you’ve never snuck past him before?”

“No, Mistress,” he shook his head, aghast at the thought.  “I have never left Midian, it would be my death to do so.”

“What do you mean your death?  You can’t survive outside of here?”

“No, I could never return home and I would be hunted by my kind if I left Midian without permission.  Please, don’t ask this of me, Mistress.  Raum is terrible in his punishments.  If he knew we spoke of this…”  Nelo looked like he might hyperventilate at the idea, and I felt bad for pushing him.

“Relax, I’m just thinking aloud,” I hedged.  “How long do you think we have before Raum comes back for another bite?”

“It’s difficult to say.”

“Nelo, I’m wondering if you wouldn’t mind letting me try out a little something on you?”

“As you wish, Mistress,” he agreed readily without even hearing what it was I had in mind.  I felt a stab of guilt for using him so selfishly when he was so eager to please me.  But what I wanted to try would benefit him too, at least, I thought so.

“Do you feed off of energy the way the others do?”  It sounded better than saying souls or ‘innocence’ the way Adam described it, and I didn’t particularly think of myself as innocent anyway.

“I do, Mistress,” his gaze dropped guiltily.

“So, if I were to hit you with my Grace, it wouldn’t hurt you, right?”

His eyes came up in surprise.  “You mustn’t share your light with me, Mistress, it is for Raum.”

“It’s mine,” I corrected him.  “And I’ll do what I see fit with it.  Right now what I’d like to do is try and see if I can push the Grace on command like I did with Adam, without so much time for concentration.  You don’t want Raum to hurt me again like he did last time, do you?”

“No, of course not, Mistress.”

“Good, then you’ll help me do this.  I’d rather not have to go through that again.”

“As you wish,” he replied, but he didn’t look all that happy about it.

“What’s the matter?  I thought you’d like to have a taste like everyone else?”

“I’m not worthy of your Grace, Mistress.”

“That’s debatable. I happen to think you’re way more worthy than Raum, who takes what he wants like a bully.”

“If you say so.”

Geez, I never thought I’d have to beg someone for the chance to feed them a bit of my Grace…  “I do.  So… stand right there and hold still.  Let’s see if I can do this.”

“Would you like me to try and scare you?” he asked helpfully, and I suppressed the urge to smile.

“No, part of what I’m trying is to see if I can do this on command, without any fear.”  That, and I didn’t find the little guy scary at all, despite his demon status.  “Just, give me a sec,” I ordered, closing my eyes to center myself the way Adam taught me.  It actually was a little easier without him around distracting me, and I focused the Grace under my hand much quicker.  With a little push, I felt it leave my hand, and my eyes popped open in time to see the ball of energy hit Nelo, knocking him off his feet.  He lay there, unmoving, still bathed in the glow of my Grace.  “Nelo!  Are you alright?”  I thought it wasn’t supposed to hurt demons?

“I… I am…” A dazed, unfocused look came into his eyes.

“Did I hurt you?”

“Hurt?” he blinked, as if he didn’t understand the question.

“Yeah, are you alright?”

“I am… I have never felt anything like that before.  It was… as though I was part of the light, but it did not hurt, it was… comforting, and warm.”  He smiled, a trace of wonder in his voice.  “Thank you, for such a princely gift.”

Sinking back in relief he was alright and because I was worn out, I nodded tiredly.  “Yeah sure, glad you liked it.”  More importantly, I hadn’t needed to be terrified or in pain to make it work.  Step number one of the plan was coming together.

“Are you alright, Mistress?”  His voice dropped in sympathy.

“Sure, I’ll be fine. I just need to rest for a few.”

Too bad Raum had other ideas.

Chapter Twelve

“The Master comes…”  Nelo squeaked, mere seconds before the door swung open.  It was barely long enough for me to try and look a little less worn out.  Nelo dove for the shadows, I assumed because he was terrified Raum would find out about the Grace I gave him.  Knowing Raum, I could imagine he wouldn’t approve of my squandering it on a servant.

“If it isn’t my host, what a pleasant surprise.”  I mustered as much enthusiasm into my voice as I could, hoping to find him in a good mood.

“In the flesh,” he grinned.  “Speaking of which…” He snapped his fingers and my pretty red dress was replaced by a shorter one in gauzy lavender that reminded me of a costume from the old Wonder Woman TV show, when they’re on Paradise Island.  “Much better,” his smile turned lascivious, and I wondered what I’d have to endure.

“Very pretty, thank you,” I nodded meekly.

“Yes, you are, pretty as a picture.  Not that I don’t enjoy you down there on the floor, but please, rise and join me for a glass of wine.”

“Alright.”  Rising slowly, I approached him cautiously, not quite knowing what he expected of me.

“I must say, it’s pleasing to see you’ve had a change of heart and accepted your fate, but I do miss a bit of the fire in your eyes.  So invigorating.”  His eyes flashed playfully as he poured us each a glass of wine from a serving tray that appeared on the table.

Ugh, I wished he’d make up his mind, did he want me to play along or fight him?  “I thought about what you said before, I might as well make the best of it right?  After all, I’m gonna be here for a long, long time.”

His eyes widened at that.  “Indeed?”  Raum pressed the glass into my hand, and I took a deep drink.  “How very forward thinking of you.” He almost sounded disappointed I wasn’t putting up more of an objection.

“But you won’t hurt me if I cooperate, right?”  I injected a bit of fear into my voice and was rewarded by his smile.  Oh yeah, he definitely got off on the idea that he had me right where he wanted me.

“As long as it suits my needs,” he replied, savoring that distinction.  “And as long as you keep me satisfied.”

Ick.  “What would satisfy you now, my lord?”  I asked as submissively as I could manage.  In the space of a heartbeat, he pulled me into his arms, his eyes dark and terrible.

“For those pretty eyes of yours to cloud with pain.”

Fear swept through me, despite my best efforts to keep my head.  “I’ll give you what you want, you don’t have to hurt me.”  I gathered the Grace beneath my hand.  Unfortunately it was much harder after using it on Nelo.

“But I want to hurt you, my lady,” he grinned wickedly.  “You taste so much better laced with fear.”

“Here, take it then.”  My voice quavered as I pushed the Grace into him, willing it to be enough.  His head fell back with a groan of pleasure, and I thought I was in the clear, but then his teeth descended, rending my flesh until I screamed in pain.  The Grace surged stronger, and I felt his corresponding shudder of delight as he held me close.  There were no pretty words of encouragement that time, Raum took his fill of what he wanted and cast me aside, not bothering to heal my shoulder either.

“Make yourself ready, I’ll expect you to attend me at court tonight,” he threw out without a backwards glance as he left the room.

I stumbled towards the bed, weak between the double shot of Grace I’d given up along with the shock of the wound that still pulsed in pain.  Once he was gone, I collapsed against the bed, struggling to manage the energy to heal my shoulder before I got any weaker.  The last thing I wanted to do was pass out in my state.  I could only muster enough Grace to get the bleeding to stop, and fell back against the pillow, needing to rest to regain my strength before I could attempt anything more.  The tears fell as a wave of self pity came over me.  How was I supposed to sit tight and wait it out until Adam was ready to spring me?

Raum didn’t want to be fed, he wanted to take the Grace from me.  I knew in my heart he wouldn’t stop at a little bite here and there, it would get progressively worse.  My gaze fell to the balcony where I’d last seen Adam take off.  “Please, Adamiel… please, please hurry,” I whispered, praying he’d hear me.  There was a light touch on my ankle and I jumped, blinking down at Nelo who shrank back guiltily, his voice barely above a whisper.

“I’ll help you escape, Mistress…”

* * *

We decided it would be safest to leave just before dawn, when most of the population of Midian sought their beds and there were still plenty of shadows to work with.  While the demons could endure the sunlight, most of them preferred the darkness, as the light made them uncomfortable at best and actually caused pain for some of them.  That meant I had to get through court with Raum and hope he didn’t feel peckish again before we left, because I would need all the strength I could get for the journey back home.

I still had no idea how we were going to get past Naberios at the gate.  I decided to cross that bridge when we came to it, focusing on one step of the plan at a time, or I might have talked myself out of it as too foolhardy.  Even with the nap to conserve my energy beforehand, it was hard to stay awake in Raum’s court that night.  Mostly because it was boring as hell.  When he ordered me to ‘attend’ him at court, that largely meant standing around looking pretty, while other demons came up to pay him obeisance.  I thought he might call for another demonstration of my power, or even offer me up to one of his favored vassals or something, but I was largely ignored, which served my purpose just fine.

I was zoning out when I heard my name and recalled where I was, blinking back at him blankly before I realized he wanted me to come forward.  “You have served me well today, kneel,” he said magnanimously in a ringing voice.  With little choice I knelt before him on the stone floor, hoping he didn’t decide to reward me with more of his attention.  Instead he produced a heavy gold necklace, encrusted with diamonds and deep, purple stones that might have been amethysts, bending to fasten it around my neck with a tender kiss to the angry wound that remained at my shoulder.  “There now, that makes it all better, doesn’t it, my lady?”

His mood was bright and I drummed up a thankful smile.  “Thank you, my lord, it’s beautiful.”

“It becomes you my dear, as does my other gift,” his fingers traced over the rough edges of the bite marks.  “The riot of colors highlight your delicate beauty.  Imagine how lovely your skin would look covered in such marks.”  I didn’t have to fake the shudder of fear and revulsion that went through me, or the wave of despair at his amused chuckle.  “Rest well then, m’lovely.  Tomorrow is another day.”

“Thank you, my lord,” I mumbled.  Taking that for a sign of dismissal, I got the hell out of there before he decided he wanted to play artist with the blank canvas of my flesh.  I felt strong enough to heal the shoulder wound more completely, but I decided to conserve my strength, in case I needed it.  Besides being a little sleepy, I felt much more like my old self, and it wore on my last nerve to sit around and wait until dawn to make a break for it.  Patience had never been my strong suit, and lack of it made any further sleep impossible.

Nelo brought me a long, dark cloak to mask my human appearance and any sign of my telltale glow in case I got scared along the way.  He also retrieved my regular clothes and shoes.  I put them on in anticipation of the long walk, but the trip out of Midian proved much quicker than the trip in.  It helped immensely to have a demon guide to help us hop from one shadow to the next.  In half a dozen or so jumps, and half as many minutes, Nelo had us out of the palace and inside the subterranean corridors beneath the city.

Once inside the tunnel, it was slower going, because he hadn’t been there much before, and it was easier to walk for the most part.  The time of day served us well, there were few we ran into along the way.  Nelo was able to easily obscure us from view by pulling us into the shadows and they passed right by us without being any the wiser.  I admit, it was tempting to try and rush, as I felt like our disappearance might be noticed at any time and Raum would set his minions after us.  But Nelo persuaded me that slow and stealthy was the wiser choice (he did know a thing or two about being stealthy).  If not for the grip I had on his hand, I might have lost him a time or two.

As we approached the gate our pace slowed to a crawl, and I clung to Nelo’s small hand.  “Do you know how to get through the gate?  Can we make a run for it and jump through or something?”  I whispered.

“I can get us through the gate once we reach it, but Naberios will surely see us coming and keep us from… running for it.”

“I’ve been thinking about that.  What if I hit him from behind with a blast of Grace?  That might distract him long enough for us to get by, right?”

“It might,” Nelo sounded skeptical.  “But what if he’s facing this way?”

“We’ll have to hope a little luck is on our side.”

Unfortunately, when we came to the final stretch of corridor, Naberios could be plainly seen facing in our direction, his hulking form blocking most of the passage.  “What about the shadow he’s casting?  Can we jump to the shadow right in front of him and then try and duck past him?”

“As you wish, Mistress,” Nelo replied, and we slid into the shadow, the darkness disorienting as it always was, but he navigated through it just fine.  The next thing I knew, we stood in front of the gate guard, his expression of surprise almost comical in someone so large.  We took advantage of that surprise, and I let go of Nelo’s hand to duck under the guard’s arm, while Nelo slid under his legs.  If I’d thought about it logically ahead of time, I probably shouldn’t have let go of his hand like that.  Nelo could have popped us back into a different shadow and it would have been nearly impossible for them to find us.  Instead, Naberios easily caught me by the arm and I was trapped in his surprisingly gentle grip.  Who would have thought such a big guy could move so fast?

I could see Nelo standing next to the gate, his body crouched low to the ground as if he wasn’t sure which way to spring.  “Go ahead, Nelo.  No sense in you getting caught too,” I called to him, but he stayed put.  Maybe he was afraid to go ahead without me and afraid to go back?  I turned my attention to my captor, swallowing back my fear at his stern expression.  “Hi, it’s Naberios, right?”  He didn’t reply and I tried again.  “Is there a toll we should pay you, maybe?”

Naberios looked at me for a long time, his expression inscrutable.  “He told me you’d be coming,” he said finally and it took me a second before I realized he meant Adam, and I gave him my most winsome smile.

“Oh.  Did he happen to say you should let me by?”  That was met with stony faced silence and I lost my smile.  Wasn’t it bad enough I was being held by the demons that Adam felt he had to add his own instructions to the gate guard as well?  A disgruntled tone crept into my voice.  “Damn Adam anyway… he’s not the boss of me, is he the boss of you?”

That produced an effect, his expression became even more sour and disapproving.  “No.”

“So why are you letting him tell you what to do?”  Ha, I had him there!   I didn’t have time to gloat though, as he still gave no sign of letting me go.

“I don’t serve Adamiel, I serve Raum.  Do you expect me to believe he released you with this as an escort?” He gestured with distaste to Nelo who still crouched next to the gate.

“Raum isn’t the boss of me either,” my eyes flashed in annoyance.  “What are you going to do with me?  You can’t leave the gate unattended, right?”  His gaze flicked to the shining rock face.  “You can’t take me back to the palace yourself.  And the last time I checked, a cellphone doesn’t exactly go with that ensemble.”

“We will wait.”

“Wait for what?”

“Someone will come and I will send you back with them.”

“What if they eat me instead?  You saw how Bert and Hubie were when I got here, what if I don’t get delivered safely back to the palace?”

“Perhaps you should have thought of that before you left the safety of its walls?”

“Or… you could let me pass, and then I’d owe you a favor.”  It occurred to me that he must do the occasional bartering.  Hadn’t Adam said he’d gotten in because Naberios owed him a favor?

“What favor could I want of you?” he scoffed, but I could tell I held his interest and I nodded encouragingly.

“That’s the beauty of an open ended favor, you never know when it might come in handy.”

“No,” he said simply and I mashed my lips together to keep from swearing.

“Fine then, what about a favor from Adamiel?”

That caught his attention.  “You have the ability to make such an offer in his stead?”

Okay, I knew I was stepping out of bounds, but I had no idea how else to get past him and the gate was right there, freedom beckoning to me so tantalizingly.  There was no way I could go back to Raum.  No way.  I had to make it as lucrative for him as possible.  “Of course I do.  He must have told you I belong to him, right?”  I tried to use terms he would understand, even as it chafed to admit I belonged to anyone like property.

“You belong to Raum now.”

“Only because it served Adam’s purpose for the time being.  But he didn’t want me damaged.  I can’t imagine him being happy about me being treated like this, can you?”  I shoved aside the dark cloak to show the angry red wound on my shoulder, no longer as deeply scarred thanks to my naturally enhanced healing, but still a definite sign of bite marks.  I took a gamble, because a guy like Naberios might not bat an eyelash over my being maimed beyond recognition, or care what Adam wanted, but instead his scowl deepened as he examined the injury.

“Raum marked you.”

“Yes, with pain, and I gave him what he wanted at the time too.”  I didn’t bother to hide my bitterness.  “He wanted to hurt me.  He said I tasted better that way.  Adam would never want that, would you want that for your woman?”  Did he even have a woman if he stood guard all the time?  I saw his resolve start to falter though, and it wasn’t hard to drum up a few tears, my fate literally hanging in the balance.  “Who knows what he’ll do to me next time just for fun.  Please let me go, I’ll owe you a debt of gratitude and so will Adamiel.”  Long seconds ticked by, and I didn’t think he would go for it, but then he let go of my arm, taking a step back from the gate.

“Go then, and don’t come back.  If Raum captures you again, I will not interfere a second time.”

I didn’t stop to ask questions, I slid past him, grabbing hold of Nelo’s hand to pass through the gate.  “Thank you,” I gave the big man a smile of gratitude, “I won’t forget this.”

“Nor will I,” he nodded and I wondered what I’d promised in order to buy my freedom.

* * *

Just because Naberios let us pass, didn’t mean he’d bar anyone else from coming after us, and once we were on the normal side of the gate, we stepped up the pace, adrenaline giving me the push I needed to get my feet moving.  We didn’t stop to think about moving between shadows, I could have cared less about running into regular humans at that point.

As we progressed into the better traveled hallway at the rear of the club, Nelo faded into the gloom, though I could still feel him keeping up beside me.  I strode brazenly through the strip club, barely sparing a look for the denizens, apart from the bartender who I recognized as a demon.  After what I’d been through, they were the least of my problems.  Drug pushers, low lifes and other assorted scum?  Bring ‘em on!  Compared to Raum they didn’t scare me one bit.

Nelo stuck close to my side, coalescing into view when we reached the parking lot.  We hadn’t talked about what would happen next, where he would go once we made it to the ‘real’ world, and I felt responsible for him after all his help.  “Now we have to find a cab that’ll stop in this neighborhood.” I flashed him a smile, my spirits incredibly buoyed by our successful escape attempt.  It was night out, late at that, and finding a cab proved to be more difficult than I would have thought.  Without any money or my cellphone I couldn’t catch the bus or easily call anyone to come and pick me up.

Except for the one person who owed me a similar favor.   Finding a working payphone, I dialed my brother’s number, hoping he’d be in decent enough shape to come and get me.  I’d done the same for him more than a few times over the years as part of our pact not to let each other drive when either of us had too much to drink, though I hadn’t had to call him for a ride in a long, long time.  Sure, I could have called Ben.  He would have come to get me without question, or even Daphne, but it was late and I’d already been gone for a few days.  I figured it would be better not to interrupt their night’s sleep for taxi service, and it was the kind of imposition you needed family for.

Making the collect call, I hurried to get the words out in the brief amount of time allotted before the phone cut me off. “Matty!  It’s me, just accept the charges, okay?”

“Merce?”  His voice thick with sleep, Matty came on the line after a long pause and I let out the breath I’d been unconsciously holding.

“Hey Matt, I’m fine and everything, but I need you to come and pick me up.”

“It’s… almost four in the morning.”

“Yeah, I know, that’s why I’d rather not keep standing out on this street corner.  Can you please come and pick me up?”

“I thought you were supposed to be the responsible one?”

“I thought we’d switch for a while.  You can go back to being the irresponsible one next week.  Now get your ass up out of bed and come and get me!”  I put a bit of heat into my voice because that was the only way I was gonna get him to leave his warm bed.  Had he even known I was missing in the first place?  It didn’t sound like it from the tone of his voice.

“Alright, alright, hold your horses.  Where are you?” he yawned and I gave him the address.  Twice.   Reasonably certain he wouldn’t fall back asleep again, I turned to Nelo who stood beside me, his eyes wide as he took in his surroundings.  “You should probably stay out of sight when he gets here.  The fewer people who know about you the better, especially if Raum sends anyone after us.”

“As you wish, Mistress,” Nelo nodded readily.

“After we get home and sleep for about a thousand years we can decide what to do next.  Unless you have any ideas?”  He shook his head and I realized how rattled he was.  Seattle was probably a little overwhelming for someone who’d spent his entire existence in a demon plane.  Good thing we managed to get there at night instead of full daylight, that would have made him really uncomfortable.

Even with the cloak, I was pretty cold by the time Matty pulled up in his beater car.  He didn’t bat an eye when I held the door open long enough for Nelo to climb in or mention the unusual cloak or what I was doing out there in the middle of the night by myself.  All he did was nod blearily over my profuse thanks for the ride.  Maybe he was on autopilot, but I was grateful for the no questions asked ride, I was sure to get the opposite from Ben.

Ben.

He was probably going out of his mind insane with worry. He didn’t like it when I was a half hour late and I’d been gone for days…  “Did Ben contact you at all while I was gone?”  I asked Matty as we turned onto my street.

“No, was he supposed to have?  Is this about that Thanksgiving thing?  I told you I’d come, but I don’t know if I’ll have a date or not.  Just text me the address to Ben’s place.”

I frowned over that; had something happened to Ben after all?  Did Bert and Hubie go back even after I went along with them quietly as promised?  Because I couldn’t imagine him being okay with me never making it up those stairs that night.  “Yeah, I meant about Thanksgiving,” I replied, not wanting Matt to worry.

“How come you didn’t call Ben to come and get you?” he asked, waking up a little more and I seized upon the distraction of my apartment building up ahead.

“It’s a long story, but I promise I’ll tell you sometime when we’re both more awake.  Do you have your spare key to my place?”

“Yeah, sure…” he unclipped it from his keychain and held it up.  “Where are your keys?”

I leaned across the console and dropped a noisy kiss to his hair like I used to do when we were kids.  “Thanks for the ride, Matty.  That’s one less you owe me,” I grinned, slipping out of the car before he could press for more.  The barest flicker of movement told me Nelo scooted out beside me, and I shut the car door with a slam.  “Here we are, home sweet home.”  Leading the way up the stairs, I saw Nelo relax at my side once we were in the darkened hallway.  “Almost there.”  I gave him a comforting little pat on the shoulders as I unlocked the front door.  I was about to invite him inside when the door was yanked out of my hand, Sam’s face a mask of surprise as he caught sight of me.

“You are back!” he crowed in excitement and I shushed him.

“Hey, keep it down, I have neighbors.  Wait until you hear where I’ve been.”  I might have said more but his face went deadly calm, that lethal look descending over his features.

“Mercy, come to me.”  Sam stretched one hand out towards me as a gleaming sword appeared in the other.  “Do not be afraid, I will protect you.”

Was there something dangerous standing behind me?

Chapter Thirteen

I froze, expecting bloodshed at any moment.  “What is it?”

“Come to me, Mercy.  You mustn’t let that unclean thing touch you.”

Unclean?  I had to look then, and turned around, but there was no one behind me.  No one except for Nelo, who hid behind me, his hand clutched tight in mine.  “Oh, for crying out loud… Sam relax, he’s with me.  This is Nelo.”

Sam’s head canted to one side as he studied us, the sword remaining fixed in his hand.  “How do you mean he’s with you?  He’s a demon.”

“Yeah, I know,” I snorted.  It wasn’t like he could pass for anything else.  “Now put the sword away and let us in, it’s been a hell of a few days and I’d like to sit down.”

“Hours.”

“What?”

“You’ve only been gone a few hours,” Sam clarified.

“That’s impossible.  I was in Midian for…”  I wasn’t exactly sure how long, but it had been at least a few days.

“Time works differently there, you could be gone for years and only have a few months elapse here on Earth.  It’s the opposite in Heaven, time is measured differently.  That’s why I was gone so long when I went to see Nathanael.”

“Oh.”  That changed things.  At least I wouldn’t have to worry about explaining to Parker why I hadn’t shown up for work, but I was tired enough to call in sick and sleep for a week.  Still, it was hard to wrap my head around the concept.  “Just a few hours?” I frowned when I realized that Sam hadn’t eased his stance or taken his eyes off of Nelo.  “Sam… relax.”  I laid a hand on his chest pushing him backwards, tugging Nelo behind me like a human choo choo train.

“I don’t understand,” Sam replied, but he did send the magic sword back to wherever it went when it wasn’t in use.  Maybe it lived wherever he kept his wings?

“I can see that, but you can calm down. I never would have gotten out of Midian if it wasn’t for him, he can be trusted.”  I gave the little demon’s hand a soft squeeze of encouragement, but he still hid behind me like a two year old.  “I had to have some help since some people were unavailable.”  I gave him a pointed look.

“I could not go to Midian.”

“Adam did,” I pointed out.

“OMG, he did?”  Sam gasped and I did my best to stifle the smile that rose to my lips.  He had to have been spending more time with Daphne lately…

“But you did know I was in Midian?  I thought you were in the Ether going after Azazael?”

“Yes, Adam sought me out there after you were taken.  He told me you were safe in Midian and not to be disturbed.  He said he would deal with Azazael personally.”

There went Adam, making life altering decisions for me again, and my temper snapped.  “For the love of God, when are you going to stop doing every little thing that Adam tells you!  He tells you to hide away from me and you do it.  He tells you to stop pursuing Azazael and you do it.  He tells you to leave me in a demon world and you do it!  When are you going to start thinking for yourself?”  I stared at him accusingly.

“I… had not thought…”

“No, you don’t think.  That’s the point.  You’re happy to let him make all the decisions.  Well, I’m sick of it.  Just because I’m in love with the guy doesn’t give him the right to play with my life like that.  From now on, I’m in charge of my destiny.  Not some ancient prophecy, or a sadistic demon lord or even God’s gift to angels.”  My anger spent, I was instantly contrite as Sam shrank away from me like a spanked puppy.

“I apologize, I didn’t realize it was so contrary to your wishes.”

He was backing away from me, and I felt about an inch high for putting that look on his face.  “Sam, I’m sorry… it’s been a rough day.”

“I will leave you to your rest then, if you are certain you are safe?”  He looked to Nelo who enacted his best impression of a statue, remaining perfectly still.

“Yeah, I’m fine, but you don’t have to leave…”

“I won’t be far.”  With another pointed look to the demon, Sam stepped out onto the balcony and disappeared from view.

Great, now I’d gone and upset the sweetest guy on the face of the earth.

“Perhaps I should go, Mistress,” Nelo’s small voice pulled me out of my shame spiral and I gave him a reassuring smile.

“No, don’t be silly.  He might be Fallen but Sam’s still an angel, that comes with a certain amount of prejudice, I suppose.  He’ll get used to you being around after a while.  If you decide you want to stick around that is, you don’t have to stay with me.  You can go anywhere in the world you want to.”  Instead of taking that as an encouraging thing, the idea seemed to throw Nelo into a panic and he crouched down smaller as he looked out the window to where Sam disappeared.

“He lives here with you, Samael?”

“Sort of.  He’s helping protect me from Azazael and the demons Raum sent after me.  Not that it ended up doing a whole lot of good.”

“And you belong to Adamiel…”

“In a manner of speaking, yes.”

“Are there any other angels that live here with you?”  His eyes darted around nervously.

“No…” Poor little guy, he was scared to death.  “Oh Nelo, try not to worry about it, okay?  I won’t let them hurt you.  But I’ll understand if you don’t want to stay with me, my life can be kinda complicated.”

“Oh no, Mistress.  I would not willingly leave you,” he shook his head earnestly.  “If you will allow me to stay, I would serve you.”

It warmed my heart to hear his pledge, but I wasn’t looking for a servant.  “You don’t have to serve me, Nelo, you can stay here as my friend.”

“As you wish, Mistress.”

“And you don’t have to keep calling me Mistress.”

“As you wish, Mistress.”

I decided to give up, it was late and I was bone weary.  Only… would Azazael be waiting for me in the Ether when I closed my eyes?  Even if Adam decided to handle him personally, would he have taken care of it already if only a few hours had passed since I’d left?  It was enough to give me pause and send me to the kitchen for a cup of coffee instead of to the bedroom.  Would I be a big fat chicken if I called Sam back to watch over me while I slept?  Somehow I wasn’t able to bring myself to do that after the way we’d parted.

I was turning the coffeemaker on when I heard the jangle of keys at the door.  Was Sam coming back on his own?

“Mercy?”  It was Ben who stormed into the apartment, looking frantic until he spotted me in the kitchen, my keys and purse in his hands.  “Where the hell have you been?”

Any relief I felt at seeing him was instantly sucked down the drain at his tone of voice.  I hated it when he talked to me like that.  Only how had he even known I was home again?  “Ben, what are you doing here?”

“What am I doing here?”  Uh oh… I recognized that tone and I did my best to remember he was only worried about me and leave my temper at the door.  “I’m looking for you.  You show up at my house, never make it upstairs, your purse is in my garage, your car is on my street.  You don’t answer the phone, you don’t call… you could have told me you were leaving again.”

“Yeah, but how did you know I was here?”

“I had a black and white keeping an eye on the place.  They told me you got dropped off about fifteen minutes ago by a seedy looking car.  So, where were you?”

“That’s my brother’s car,” I frowned defensively.  “You had the cops watching my apartment?”

“I thought you were in danger, I thought you’d been attacked or something.”

“Yeah, well you’re not wrong there,” I conceded.  “Do you want a cup of coffee?  I could really use one.”

“Do I…”  Ben’s hand clenched into a fist and he brought it up to his mouth, as if he didn’t trust himself to speak any further until he got a hold of his temper.  “I swear, if you don’t tell me what’s going on right now, I’m going to walk out that door and I won’t come back.”

“I’m trying to, but you need to calm down.  Have a cup of coffee, trust me, you’ll need it.”  Either that or something a little stronger, but I already had the coffee mugs down.  Ben slid onto one of the barstools, waiting patiently for me to begin.  I have to admit, I wasn’t looking forward to the conversation at all, so the story spilled out in a disjointed, convoluted manner.

Starting with the arrival of Bert and Hubie in his garage, I led him through the tale, ending up with my arrival back home again but leaving out my argument with Sam or the fact that Nelo was crouched behind the couch, watching us like a tennis match.  I went a little light on the details involving Adam, because that was a whole other conversation we needed to have, and I wanted to tackle one thing at a time.  But otherwise I didn’t skimp on the particulars, and I was almost to the bottom of my coffee mug by the time I finished.

Ben hadn’t touched his coffee.

“So…” I ventured, setting my mug into the sink.  “Now you can see why I didn’t call you, and why I disappeared so suddenly.  It wasn’t exactly my idea.”  I expected an apology maybe, or an expression of worry over my wellbeing.  I didn’t expect the simmering anger at all.

“That’s where you were.  You were in another plane of existence.  How the hell am I supposed to deal with this?”

“You could be a little nicer to me, considering where I’ve been,” I scowled, immediately on the defensive.  Was I pushing his buttons on purpose to put the break up on him?  Looking back I can agree I could have handled it differently.  But hey, I never claimed to be an angel, I’m just as screwed up as the next person.

“This… this isn’t normal, Mercy.”

“Tell me something I don’t know.”  Things hadn’t been normal for me since I’d woken up in the hospital with Sam’s Grace, but it was my reality and I thought he’d had some time to reconcile himself to the idea.

“This isn’t what I signed up for.  I can’t take not knowing what might be happening to you when you aren’t there.”

“It’s not like I did any of this on purpose.  I didn’t ask for the Grace, and I didn’t ask to be a demon magnet.”

“It’s just… you never consider what I have going on in my life, Mercy.  It’s all about you.  I have an incredibly stressful job, and a responsibility to the community to do it well.   I can’t be up all hours of the night chasing after you every time you attract a new threat from the underworld.”

“Are you saying you want out of this relationship?”  A flutter of guilt pulsed in my belly.  Was I taking the coward’s way out?  There wasn’t even time to think about it before he rose to his feet, pushing away from the breakfast bar.

“Is that what this is?  Because I feel like I’m the last to know about every little thing that happens to you.  You won’t let me stay here with you…”

“I’m trying to keep you safe.”

“That’s my job.  I’m the cop for chrissakes.”

“Wait, are you complaining because I don’t let you into my life enough, or that I’m making too much of a dent into yours?  ‘Cause I’m a little confused.”  It stung that he thought I was selfish, partly because it was true.  I had been incredibly focused on the things going on in my life, but just then was the wrong time to call me on it; my nerves were already frazzled to raw edges.

Unfortunately Mimsy chose that time to venture into the living room, hissing when she noticed Nelo for the first time.  Nelo, finding himself in a staring match with the fuzzy little creature, completely forgot he was supposed to be keeping out of sight.

“What the hell is that?”  Ben demanded, one hand going for the holster at his belt.

“No, it’s fine.”  I stepped out from behind the kitchen counter, putting myself between him and Nelo.  “Ben this is Nelo, remember I told you about him?”

“You did not mention you had a… a demon still here with you.  Mercy… you can’t expect me to be okay with this.  Get it out of here.”

“He’s not an it, he’s a him and he’s my friend.”  I expected it from Sam, but hadn’t Ben heard me say how I couldn’t have escaped Midian without Nelo’s help?  Acutely uncomfortable, Nelo backed towards the nearest shadow, and I was afraid he’d jump somewhere and get lost and I’d never see him again.

“I don’t give a good goddamn what he is, get him out of here.”

“Oh, would you just pipe down!” I waved Ben off, moving to intercede before Mimsy took a swipe at Nelo.  “Mimsy, it’s okay, baby… calm down, this is Nelo, he’s a friend.” I spoke in a calm, soothing voice, but she still backed up when I approached.  God only knew what I smelled like coming from Midian, I didn’t blame her for being skittish.

“What is that beast?”  Nelo asked, eyes wide as he peeped out from behind the couch.

“This is my cat, Mimsy.  Haven’t you ever seen a cat before?  No, of course not,” I answered my own question at seeing him cower from the little animal.  “She won’t hurt you if you don’t get too close until she gets used to you, she’s just as afraid of you as you are of her.”

“She is your… companion?”

“Yeah, she’s lived here with me for a couple of years now and she’s a little skittish with new things, but she’ll settle down quick enough.  Won’t you, Mimsy?”  I reached out to let her sniff my fingers and she let me pat her head, but that’s as close as she let me get to her.  I was so fixated on calming her down, I didn’t realize Ben had fallen silent right away.  Until I looked back and saw him frozen in place, his expression one of exasperation mingled with anger.  “Ben?”  Then it dawned on me, I’d frozen him just as Nathanael had done that time in the parking lot at Severino’s!

“Oh no…. no, no, no!  Ben?  Ben, can you hear me?”  Rushing to his side, I reached out to touch him, but he gave no response.  How the hell had I done that?  Would he snap out of it eventually or had I unwittingly done something worse to him?  “Sam?  Samael?  Are you around?”  Maybe it was selfish for me to call, but I needed angelic reinforcements.

Landing light as a cat, Sam dropped to my balcony, his face a mask of worry as he pulled open the sliding door.  “Is something the matter?” he asked, with no sign of any hard feelings.

“I’ll say, take a look at what I accidentally did to Ben!”

“Yes, I see him,” Sam nodded, and I waited, but that was his only response.

“Is there anything you can do to snap him out of it?  What if I accidentally messed with his brain?”

“I like him better like that, Mistress.  Perhaps you should leave him this way?” Nelo commented, coming out from behind the couch to study him closer.

“I actually agree with him on this one, he’s much more agreeable this way,” Sam nodded.

“When the two of you are done with your comedy act, can you maybe help me focus on the problem at hand?”  I replied tartly.  “What if he’s stuck like that?”

“It will wear off soon enough, though you might wish it hadn’t when he wakes.  He looks angry.”

“He was angry,” I sighed, wondering if that was it for Ben and me.  I know I was in love with someone else and I hadn’t intended to keep seeing Ben on the side, but that wasn’t how I’d planned to end things with him.  Actually, I hadn’t made any plans at all yet on how to handle the break up, but I knew I hoped we could still stay friends, as cliché as that might sound.  “Maybe if we…”   Ben came back to life then, not missing a beat from his last train of thought.

“I mean it, Mercy, this… is…”  Ben blinked, looking from me to Sam to Nelo who all stood around him, watching him intently.

“Ben…”

“You did it again, didn’t you?  You messed with my head, like you did before.”

“No, it wasn’t like that.  Last time it wasn’t me, it was Nathanael,” I tried to explain, but he wasn’t in the right frame of mind to listen.

“Like that makes it better,” he gave a short bark of laughter.  “Or is this your doing this time?”  Ben accused Sam, who gave him a ‘who me?’ look, but remained silent.

“No, it was an accident, I didn’t mean to,” I stepped in, not wanting Sam to take the fall for me.  “Look, if you’ll calm down, we can talk about this.”  But Ben was already pushing past me for the door.

“I can’t do this right now, Mercy. I have to get to work.”

“But it’s the middle of the night,” I frowned, following him to the door.

“There’s still plenty of work to do.  I need to focus on the familiar right now, because I’m all mixed up inside about what’s right and wrong, and I don’t like how that feels one bit.”

“Okay, if that’ll make you feel better.”  I wasn’t sure what else to say to that, but I made one last ditch effort.  “If it helps, we’re with the good guys.”

“That’s easy for you to say,” he scowled, looking with equal distrust to both Nelo and Sam.  “Right now I have to go with my gut, and my gut is telling me to get the hell out of here.”

“I guess we’ll talk more later then,” I added, but he was already out the door, leaving me to lock it behind him.

“Did I offend him?”  Sam asked softly and I flashed him a sad smile.

“No, I don’t think so.”

“Was it my presence that upset him so, Mistress?”  Nelo chimed in, and I waved them both off, heading back to the kitchen to get a drink of something stronger.

“No, I’m thinking it’s me that upset him so much.  And he doesn’t even know the half of it,” I sighed morosely, pouring a healthy shot of Bailey’s into Ben’s untouched cup of coffee and taking a deep drink.  I started to recognize things with Ben were likely broken beyond repair even before we got to the issue of Adam, and there was a tiny part of me that was glad about it.  I hadn’t been thrilled with the idea of giving him the ‘it’s not you it’s me’ speech, and I had more than a little bit of guilt wrapped around how much I’d leaned on Ben over the past few months, even though I knew he wasn’t the one.

“Maybe this was for the best?” Sam suggested, echoing my own thoughts.  “I really didn’t see the two of you working out anyway.  Anytime there are secrets between people, it corrupts the bond between them.  And any time a person can’t be their true self with another person, it’s only a matter of time before they grow apart.”

Sam dispensing relationship advice?  Had I emerged from the demon plane into an alternate reality?  “Have you been watching Oprah lately?”

“Yes, why?” he smiled brightly, and I had to laugh.  Grabbing another mug out of the cupboard, I poured a splash of the alcohol into it and slid it across the counter to him.

“Have a drink with me.”

Sam accepted the mug with a dubious expression on his face.  “Will this make me sick?  Like the beer?”

“Not if you don’t have too much.  Just try it, you’ll like it, it tastes like chocolate.”  That was all I needed to say and Sam was game, instantly bringing it to his lips and tipping the mug back to finish it.

“That was delicious, may I have some more please?”

Ordinarily I might have said no, I didn’t want him getting sick after all, but I didn’t want to drink alone.  “Sure, just take it easy, it’s not like chocolate milk.  How about you, Nelo, do you want a drink?”  For the moment Sam didn’t seem to mind the demon’s presence.  Maybe having a common ‘enemy’ in Ben had brought them over to the same side?  Mimsy still gave him a wide berth though.

“No, thank you, Mistress. I am rather tired and dawn approaches.  Is there a place where I may rest?”

“Ah… sure.”  I hadn’t given a whole lot of thought to where he would stay and we explored a few options.  He didn’t want to infringe upon my space, and I knew he’d want somewhere quiet and dark, so the couch was out of the question.  In the end we settled on the hallway closet, despite my misgivings.   Nelo assured me that it was just what he wanted, nice and cozy with very little light, and curled up beside the vacuum cleaner like a cat.  Satisfied he’d found a comfortable place to crash, I returned to the kitchen to find Sam pouring himself another drink.

I’m afraid I don’t remember a whole lot of what happened after that.  I know there was a lot more alcohol involved, and some serious conversation about the sea.  As in, the creatures of the sea and how they fit into God’s plan, according to Sam.  Like I said, I’m fuzzy on the details.  I know there was singing at one point, and that Sam possessed a very fine tenor voice.  I remember telling him all about my time in Midian and that there were tears standing in his eyes at one point.  Whether it was because of Raum’s treatment of me, or my vivid recollection of my time with Adam… I don’t rightly recall.

Somehow or other I stumbled into my own bed well after the rise of the sun, only after tucking Sam in on the couch with strict instructions not to go anywhere while he was the least bit drunk.  Falling into bed, I had no fear of Azazael or Raum.  My thoughts ran more towards a certain dark haired angel, replaying that last kiss over and over in my head.

As I drifted off to sleep, my mind spun fantasies of our happily ever after.  By day I would be the best bartender I could be, and by night I could travel the world with my fallen angel, or at least a fair approximation of it, in the Ether.  It wasn’t perfection, but I was more than happy to settle for it, as long as we could see each other on a regular basis.

So it wasn’t much of a stretch of the imagination for me to find myself in the Ether when I finally let go of my hold on reality.  And I wasn’t alone.

Chapter Fourteen

When I opened my eyes, I had to squint at the bright sun overhead.  Even with my floppy hat and sunglasses, the light was strong enough to make me blink.  Lying on a lounge chair, I wore a red bikini with a multi colored sarong knotted around my waist.  I recognized the beach right away, I’d been there a zillion times as a kid.  The pier on the right looked just as I remembered it, teeming with tourists.  The sand was littered with small clusters of people, their bright towels and bathing suits peppering the beach with a riot of colors.  Still under the fog of too much to drink, I watched the colors blend and shift with the movement of the ocean.

“Oh good, you’re awake.”  Adam lay next to me, stretched out on a lounge chair, frosty margarita in hand, tiny black Speedos on his lean form.  Not my usual cup of tea, but he pulled it off.  “Good job on the setting by the way, I could get used to this.”

“I hate this place,” I murmured, eyes sweeping over the sand.

“You do?  Who hates the beach?”

“It’s not the beach itself that I hate, it’s this particular beach.  I haven’t been here in a long, long time.”

“Okay, what do you hate about this beach then?”

The world around us shifted and flexed as I exerted my will over our surroundings.  “Do you see those adorable kids over there?”  I pointed to where a little boy and girl industriously dug in the sand, the girl ordering the younger boy around for the serious undertaking.

“Yeah, I see them, so what?”

“That’s Matty and me, we’re trying to dig a hole to China.”

“So, beyond being a little misguided when it comes to geography, I repeat, so what?  It looks like you’re having a good time.”

“We are.  We’re having a great time.”  Despite the unpleasant memories, I couldn’t help but smile as I watched us play in the sand.  Matty was so starved for affection he’d do anything I asked of him, fetching and carrying without complaint, just to be included.  I hadn’t always been the nicest to him, especially when I had other friends to hang around with.  But sometimes, like the day we watched, we got along great.

“I’m waiting for the light bulb moment here, but you’re not helping me out.  Why do you hate this place?”

With a sigh, my gaze shifted, searching for and finding the source of my bitterness.  “Do you see that big, fat piece of… work?  Over there under the striped beach umbrella?”

“Yeah, the one who’s asleep?”

“Passed out.  It’s just past noon and he’s passed out, completely drunk.”  I wrapped my arms around my knees as my eyes narrowed in focus on the sight of my father, snoring in the shade.  “He stayed passed out all afternoon, and Matty and I got second degree burns over most of our bodies.”

“Ouch.”

“We didn’t know any better, it was something my mom usually thought of, but she had to work that day.  I put sunscreen on us when we got here, but we went in the water and I didn’t think…”

“Of course you didn’t, how old were you?”

“Seven.”

“So, how could you know?  You were a little girl.”

“He yelled at me that night, for being so stupid.  For not taking care of my little brother.  For him having to pay for a visit to the urgent care.”  Lost in the memory, I was unaware that our surroundings were shifting, people disappearing until the beach was deserted except for the two of us.  “That’s why I’m such a slave to sunscreen I guess.  I never stopped to think about it.”

“It’s not something I’ve ever had to worry about.”

I looked over at him stretched out comfortably under the sun; he was a little pale but not unappealingly so.  “You never use sunscreen, even when you come to the beach?  I thought you said you love beaches.”

“I do, I just don’t worry about damage from the sun.  Even if I did get sunburn, it’d be gone in a couple of hours.”  He shrugged, and I wondered if the same would hold true for me.  It’d be nice not to have to worry about that anymore, though I’d probably keep putting it on out of habit.  Just in case.  “Is your dad still around?  Back in California?”

Pushing myself up to my feet, I shook the sand from the sarong and pulled off the floppy hat.  “I don’t want to stay here.  Can we go somewhere else?”

Adam was on his feet beside me in an instant, lacing his fingers through mine.  “Change it then, we can go wherever you want.”

“How about your place?”  I’d often wondered where he lived. I was under the impression he had homes all over the world.

“My place… fair enough.  Hold on then.”  Wrapping an arm around my waist, he pulled me close as the air shimmered and blurred around us.  I lost my balance at the sudden shift, falling against his sun warmed skin.  “Here we are, my place.  Well, one of them at any rate.”

I stood next to a huge, four poster bed of dark mahogany.  The room was done in soothing tones of taupe and cream, which complimented the dark wood of the floor and heavy furniture.  The minimalist pieces of art on the walls looked like they were picked out by a designer; there were absolutely no personal touches in the room whatsoever.  The view from the floor to ceiling windows showed me a city skyline, but I wasn’t sure what city it was from my vantage point.  It could have come straight out of a decorator’s magazine for million dollar apartments.   Adam wore an expensively tailored tuxedo, open at the throat with the casual grace of someone well used to wearing the best.  Instead of my red bikini, I had a red cocktail dress with a plunging neckline, and five inch heels, putting me more at eye height with Adam, my hair loose around my shoulders.

Trust Adam to transport us directly to his bedroom.  Just as suddenly I realized I had no idea if it was really Adam with his arms wrapped around me, or if I’d been opening up about my past to Azazael in disguise.  I pulled back to study his face carefully.  “How do I know you’re really you?”

“I know one way to prove it to you.”  He leaned closer, stealing a kiss and I froze, not in the most romantic mood until I knew who exactly I kissed.  He acted like Adam, smelled like Adam, tasted like him… but paranoia kicked into overdrive.  With a flick of the wrist, a sword appeared in my hand, very similar to the one he carried but a bit smaller, more feminine (if such a word could be applied to a sword), and I brought it to his neck.

“I’m serious, how do I know you’re not Azazael?”

His eyes went wide as saucers as he felt the cool steel pressed against his throat and he backed off.  “Waffles, waffles, okay?  You can drop the hardware, I’m really me!”  I moved the blade away from his skin, more relieved than I could say at hearing his silly new safeword.  “Where’d you get the nifty sword?”

“Oh, I don’t know, it’s the first thing I could think of.  Pretty neat, huh?  Too bad I don’t get one of these in the real world.  That would have come in handy against the demons.  I might not have had to go to Midian at all.”  I willed it away, a slow smile stretching across my face once I knew he was my Adam.

“Yeah, speaking of that, give me one good reason why I shouldn’t throttle you for coming here.”  His hand caressed my throat lightly before his lips traced the same path.  Any response I had in mind fell right out of my head under that tender assault, and I only belatedly realized he’d asked me a question when he pulled back to receive my answer, his eyes blazing bright.

“I thought you’d be happy to see me,” I pouted, disappointed he’d stopped with his lazy exploration once we finally were completely alone.

“I’m pretty sure I gave you specific instructions to stay in Midian.  Or did you forget?”

“I couldn’t stay there,” I frowned, pulling out of his embrace to walk to the bank of windows.  I thought we were in Chicago, but I could be wrong.

“We talked about that.  You agreed…”

“I didn’t agree to let Raum keep hurting me.   You said he wouldn’t do that if I gave him what he wanted.  Yeah, that turned out to be the opposite of what I should do,” I laughed bitterly and he was instantly at my side, turning me to face him as he searched my face carefully.

“He hurt you?  What did he do?”  His face was dark and thunderous as he checked me for signs of physical damage.

“Relax, nothing permanent,” I showed him where just the faintest trace of red marred my skin from Raum’s bite.  “It still hurt like hell though,” I swallowed uncomfortably.  “And he wasn’t gonna stop the next time, I could tell by the look in his eyes.  He said my fear made me taste better.  He said…”  I didn’t get any further because Adam gathered me into his arms, crushing me to his chest, all signs of his usual sarcasm gone.

“I’m so sorry, Mercy.  I wouldn’t have left you if I’d thought he would try something like that.  But I should have known, I should have protected you.”

“It’s okay, I’m fine now.  Just… you can see why I couldn’t stay there, right?”  I wanted him to tell me it was alright, I’d done the right thing, but when I looked into his eyes all I saw was anger.  Was he mad at me for trying to protect myself?  What was I supposed to do, wait for him to swoop in and save the day when he was good and ready?  Only when Adam spoke again I could see the anger wasn’t directed at me at all.

His arms fell away as he stalked across the room.  “Christ, no matter what I try you still end up getting hurt,” he muttered darkly and I chased after him, scared to death he might leave in his current state of agitation.

“You’re not a psychic, Adam.  There’s no way for you to predict what the future will bring.  Why don’t you stop trying to anticipate every little thing and let’s just try and live our lives?”

“You’re drunk,” was all he said, as he kept me from breaking my neck when I lost my balance on the ridiculously high heels.

“A little,” I allowed, though I only felt pleasantly buzzed from my overindulgence with Sam.

“More than a little.  Mercy, you’re completely missing the point of my staying away.”

“As near as I can tell, I stand a much stronger chance with you at my side than apart.  And if that brings some unwanted attention from the God Squad… at least we’ll have some time together, right?”

“You don’t know what you’re asking me.”  Adam pressed his forehead to mine and I could feel the indecision within him.

“I’m asking you to let me love you.  That’s all.  Is that so wrong for me to want?  To be with you?”

“It’s a sin…”

“Since when has that stopped you?” I scoffed. Adam was the epitome of what it meant to be a fallen angel.  I knew he hadn’t lived like a monk for the past two thousand years or more, far from it.  Considering the fact that he’d propositioned me within five minutes of meeting him, I knew sin wasn’t the taboo it was for someone like Sam.

“Since it cost me everything I loved.”  Adam pulled back to look me in the eyes and I was lost to the power of that brilliant gaze.  “I can’t lose you, I won’t survive it this time.”

“Then don’t lose me, stay with me.  Let yourself have a little happiness, let yourself love me.”  My lips brushed against his, entreating him to let me in.

“I do love you, Mercy. God help me, but I do…”   His fingers sifted through my dark hair, thumb tracing over the curve of my cheek in the lightest caress.  “I’ve been fighting it tooth and nail, but you get that it’s mutual, right?  I’m not much of a hearts and flowers kind of guy, but I promise you this - I will always love you more than any other man ever has, or ever will.  You can count on that.”

It felt like it was the first time I’d ever heard the words before, or maybe it was just the first time I really understood them.  He loved me.  With every fiber of his being, enough to give me a part of himself, enough to sacrifice his own happiness with the hopes of keeping me safe.  It wasn’t a line to get me into bed or get me to drop my guard.  Adam loved me, and I basked in the glow of that love.  Eyes shiny with unshed tears, I opened my mouth to tell him I didn’t need flowers, I didn’t need anything but him, but I never got that far.  Instead his lips crashed against mine, stealing the breath from my body at the intensity of the passion I found there.

After my initial surprise, I returned his kiss fervently, lips parting to accept him.  Finally, after everything that kept us apart, I was free to love him as I had in steamy dreams.  Pressed against the length of his body, I barely noticed as he urged me backwards towards the bed, until the backs of my legs hit the frame and I wobbled on those heels again.  I felt his rumble of laughter through my whole body as he lifted me, light as a feather, gently laying me down atop the huge bed and stretching out beside me.

All too happy to follow along with that course of action, my fingers went to the buttons of his shirt, placing a soft kiss on every new strip of skin I revealed.  At the same time his talented hands skimmed over my body, slowly dragging down the zipper on the back of my dress and slipping inside to stroke the bare flesh he found.  Either one of us probably could have willed away our clothes in the Ether with a single thought, but this was better, this was right.  Our lips barely parted during the slow exploration as we learned the curves and hollows of each others bodies, except to part for a sigh or groan of delight.  I wanted to touch him everywhere at once, and Adam tried his level best to do the same, too long deprived of the simple pleasure.  A faint glow bathed both of our bodies, our Grace reacting to each other in a hint of what was to come.

“You are so beautiful…”  Adam murmured against my neck, breath fanning across my moist skin after placing an open mouthed kiss there.

“So are you,” I breathed, wrapping my hand around the back of his neck possessively, craving that contact as I brought my mouth to his again.  Our touches grew more insistent, kisses hungry as the last of our clothing was discarded, nothing between us but the feel of his fevered skin against mine.  My hands continued their exploration of him, sliding over his smooth, taut body, subtly urging him to take a position above me, but Adam had an agenda of his own.

Heedless of the havoc he was playing with my body, or maybe it was his intent, Adam resisted my hint that I was ready.  Instead he proceeded to show me with clever hands and mouth what ready meant.  In response I pressed myself along the length of his body as I returned his kisses, hands fisting in the cool sheets as he drove me crazy with need.  “God, Adam… please…”  I pleaded with him finally, not quite sure what I asked for, but knowing I couldn’t stand teetering on the brink like that for much longer.

With a quick shift he was above me, his eyes holding mine as he took me in one long stroke.  The breath left my body in a sigh of pleasure at that welcome invasion, and for a long moment, I forgot to breathe.  Forgot there was anything in this world but the two of us and the exquisite joining.  My head fell back against the bed as he started to move, limbs parting to accept him completely.  My body sang under his attention, moving against him in a perfect counterpart, as though our bodies were built only for each other.

“God, how I’ve wanted this, wanted you…” he groaned, his voice tight with need.

“Always want you… always love you…”  I pledged, rapidly losing control over my responses, breath coming faster, until I tumbled over the edge and I forgot to breathe altogether, teeth scraping against his shoulder as I bit back the first cry of pleasure.  Still deep in the throes of my own peak, the moment his Grace kindled mine I cried out almost in alarm as I was catapulted even higher, the pleasure so keen I thought at one moment my heart might burst.  I felt him stiffen above me as he felt it too, eyes widening in surprise as a dazzling glow suffused our bodies, our Grace bathing us with a warm, tingly energy as we came down from the shared experience.

There were no words.  We didn’t need them as he kissed me tenderly, still tingling all over, a drowsy patina of satisfaction coloring our movements.  Adam looked down at me with half lidded eyes, brushing the hair from my face.   “Are you okay?” he asked finally.

“Better than okay,” I sighed.  “Something that good should be illegal.”

Relieved, he rolled onto his back, bringing me with him.  “I’m pretty sure it is illegal, genius.  Hence the whole fallen angel bit?” he chuckled, earning him a playful punch to the shoulder.

“That’s only forbidden with human women, remember?  I’m not human anymore, I’m something new.”  For once I was happy to embrace that quality and the uncertainty of my future if it gave me a chance to find happiness with him.  Maybe things did happen for a reason?  It was a cinch I’d never find anything like that with someone else, as far as I was concerned, we were M.F.E.O.  There was just one thing I didn’t understand.  “Why is it illegal though?  Whatever happened to ‘God is love’?”

Adam reached up to trace his fingers along the side of my face which was starting to lose the glow of Grace.  “He didn’t want angels breeding with human women, the offspring were considered monstrous.”

Not exactly what girl likes to hear for pillow talk, and my eyes flew wide with alarm.  “Actual monsters with giant heads and big, pointy teeth and stuff?”

“Ah… not exactly, though some of the Nephilim were a little scary looking by human standards.  Mostly I think He didn’t want that kind of power in anything closer to a human form.”

“Nephilim.”  I was only barely aware of the word, not much about what it meant, but resolved to Google it later when I was alone.  “So, if you and I, if we had a baby…”  If it was possible for angels to breed with human women, it seemed to follow that Adam and I could produce offspring.  It was what Azazael was counting on to be reborn.  I could see the helpless look of uncertainty in his eyes though, and that more than anything put a lid on my panic for the moment.  I put a finger to his lips to keep him from replying.  “No, I get it… I’m new.”

There was no point in speculating, and I was far away from even thinking about starting a family.  Dimly I recalled the prophecy that mentioned something about a new race of men, but there was no way of knowing what that really meant and if it would even come to pass.  Adam’s lips curved into a smile against my finger and he caught it between his teeth, tongue swirling over the sensitive pad.  It was distracting enough to make me lose my train of thought, but I soon found my way back to what I wanted to ask him.

“You were willing to risk it though?  Being cast out in order to take a human wife?”

Adam nodded, linking his fingers through mine.  “I didn’t think He’d have her killed.  I thought we’d live together in exile, but as long as we were together, it wouldn’t matter.  Of course I was an idiot.  I didn’t know anything about what it meant to live as a man.  I had no idea how to do the simplest of things, how to split wood, thatch a roof, butcher a goat.”

“Butcher a goat?”  My brows rose in surprise.  It was impossible to imagine him doing any of those things.

“Hey, don’t knock it until you try it.  Mariah could take simple food and transform it into… something magical.  Good enough to make the angels weep.”  It was hard for me to think of Adam weeping over food or anything else for that matter.  It was a different side to him he was letting me see, and I wondered how long it would last.

“Were you there when… when Raziel came for her?” I asked gently.

“No.”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to bring up painful memories…”

His face shuttered for a moment and I thought he would either push me away or change the subject with a sarcastic comment.  Instead he looked up at me with a grim smile.  “It’s okay, you deserve to know what happened.”

Chapter Fifteen

“Sam came first when he was given the task.  But as soon as he met Mariah, he couldn’t bring himself to do it.  That’s when he told me what the plan was, and that’s how I first found out she was carrying my son.”

“That’s why He sent Sam after her, because He didn’t want another Nephilim born?” I gasped.

“That, and apparently our happiness was a thorn in His side.  At least that was Nathanael’s interpretation of it.  I wasn’t supposed to enjoy my punishment quite so much.”  There was bitterness in his voice, and I stroked the back of his hand with my thumb, trying to soothe him through that small contact.

“Sam… he was a total basket case when he was cast out of Heaven though.  You think he’s tortured and moody now, you should have seen him when his sin of disobedience was fresh.  It was all I could do to keep him from ending it all, and he might have, before I reminded him it was an even bigger sin.  I was with him when Raziel came.  I hadn’t expected them to come again so quickly, or I wouldn’t have left her.  Guess I haven’t learned anything about keeping a woman safe since then, have I?”  He looked up at me with such pain behind those bright blue eyes, and I pulled him close, resting his head against my chest.

“I’m sorry for you both,” I murmured into his hair.  “But that doesn’t mean anything like that is going to happen to me.”

“You’re damned right it’s not.  We’re not having any kids for one thing, so put that idea right out of your head.”

I mashed my lips together to keep the retort from slipping out in response to that particularly blunt remark.  He was upset, I could understand that, and I kept my voice as neutral as possible.  “Trust me, just because I asked that one question about children, the last thing I want is to have your baby right now.”  I thought that would set his mind at ease, but instead he rolled onto his side, propping his head up.

“What’s so bad about having my baby?” he demanded.

“Nothing.  I said right now, I don’t want to have anyone’s baby right now.”

“But you do want to have children someday though, right?”

I couldn’t tell if that was an accusation or if he wanted reassurance, and I studied his face carefully before I replied.  “Do you really think this is the best time to have this conversation?”

“I’m sorry,” Adam fell back against the pillow with a groan, laying an arm across his eyes.  “The idea of anything happening to you makes me a little…”

“Crazy insane?”  I pressed a kiss to his chest, snuggling a little closer to him.  “Yeah, I can understand that, but my situation is completely different.  I’m thinking if the Big Guy didn’t strike me down for having the Grace in the first place, I must be part of whatever His plan is, right?  Who knows, we might even be destined to be M.F.E.O.,” I chuckled, laying my head against his shoulder.  “I’ve never felt anything like that before, what passed between us.  Have you?”

Adam kissed the top of my head, his fingers sifting through my hair lazily.  “No, that was a first for me too.”

“You’ve pretty much ruined me for all other men, you know that, don’t you?”  How could I ever accept anything less?

“Ruined you for all other men, I like the sound of that.”  I could hear his voice swelling with pride, but in that instant it brought to mind other men – namely Ben.  Technically I was still dating Ben even though our last conversation had been a fight, and a little groan of dismay escaped me.  “That bothers you?”

“No, I think I’m long overdue for a talk with Ben.”

“Oh, that guy, don’t tell me you’re still dating that jerk.”

“He’s not a jerk, he’s…”  Okay, so he had been acting a little jerky lately, but I still felt the need to defend him in his absence.  After all, none of it was easy for him to deal with, I was sure.  “He’s been under a lot of stress lately, mostly because of me.  And what do I do?  I sneak around behind his back, first in Midian and now here with you… I’m like the worst girlfriend on the planet.”

“A little debauchery never hurt anyone.”

“Take advice from a man who’s spent more than a thousand years wallowing in the gutter?  Yeah, I think I’ll pass.”  I poked him lightly in the ribs and he captured my hand, bringing it up to his lips.

“I could talk to him for you, if you like.”

“Oh yeah, that’d go over well,” a roll of the eyes was given.  I could picture how that conversation would go.  “You’d be lucky to escape without getting shot.  No, I can handle it.”

“I’d get shot for you, it’d be worth it to see the look on his face when he realizes he’s lost you once and for all to Cousin Adam,” he grinned up at me and I had to shake my head.  Even being obnoxious I still loved him more than I probably should.

“And you wonder why you have so many enemies,” I sighed.  “But I should be the one to talk to him.  I’ll take care of it when I get back, I promise.”

“Good.  Then I won’t have to take matters into my own hands.”

He sure sounded bossy.  “Since when did you get to be so possessive?”

“You’re the one who wanted me to live dangerously and openly claim you.  Well, I’m claiming you, and that means I protect what’s mine.  If you don’t speak to him, I will.  And I can guarantee I won’t be at all concerned with letting him down gently.”

“I told you I’ll tell him myself,” I insisted, trying to head off that particular line of thought.  “I think on some level he already knows, that’s part of why he’s been so prickly lately. But either way I owe him an explanation.”

“Just tell him I’ve ruined you for all other men, that should be easy enough for even him to understand.”

“I will tell him… that it’s for the best for us to both agree that it’s not working out, and that we should try to stay friends.”

“And that you belong to me.”

“And that my heart is already spoken for.” I rephrased it a little more diplomatically, but I had to admit, the idea of belonging to him didn’t suck.  “Does this mean I’ll see more of you when we get back to the real world, or are you gonna keep hiding out here in the Ether?”

“I resent the implication that I’m in any way hiding out here,” he frowned.  “I’m laying in wait.”

“For Azazael?”

“Yep, the bastard’s been laying low and this isn’t the easiest place to try and find someone unless they call you.”

“I could always help.  He might come to me if I call him.”

“Nope, no way, not a chance in hell.”  Adam sat up, the sheet falling to his waist as he leaned against the headboard.  “I am not using you as bait.”

“You’d be right there to protect me…”

“No deal.”

I scooted up next to him so I didn’t have to crane my neck, sitting cross legged as I faced him.  “Where does that leave us exactly?  You’re stuck in here until further notice and I wait for you, alone?”  That didn’t sound like much of an improvement to me.

“I’ll still see you at night.” His eyes sparked with promise and I wasn’t immune to the power of that gaze.  That part was definitely an improvement.  “And as soon as I take care of Azazael, I’ll come to you.  Deal?” It was a good thing he didn’t need sleep, it sounded like he’d be a very busy boy.

“What will you do to Azazael if you find him?” I wondered aloud.  Short of killing him, I wasn’t sure how to keep him from bothering me, and I didn’t want Adam to get into trouble with anyone for taking that kind of action.  After all, if God had wanted to punish Azazael by death he would have ordered it.  He might not like his plans upset.

Adam gave me an easy half-shrug.  “I’ll take care of it, don’t worry about it.”

“Don’t worry my pretty little head about it?” I didn’t like the sound of that.  It implied that he didn’t think I could handle it.  “Adam, if you’re going to do something dangerous, I want to know about it.”

With a sigh he picked up my hand and tumbled me into his lap.  “And I’d rather you remained ignorant of nasty little details like that.  Plausible deniability, you understand?  If anyone has to take the heat over any fallout it should be me, and only me.”

“But if you’re doing it on my behalf…”

“You’re already dealing with way too much right now, let me take care of this for you.  No questions asked, okay?”

“But…”

“I’m gonna do it anyway, you might as well get used to it,” he grinned and I found myself pouting up at him, hating that he was so damned appealing while I was trying to work up a good argument.

“Tell me again why I’m in love with you?” I finally sighed in resignation.

“Beats the hell outta me.”

* * *

When I woke up around noon, I felt pleasantly groggy, in a bit of a fog I guess you could call it.  Actually, considering all the drinks, I should have had a splitting headache, but I felt pretty great.  It probably had more to do with a certain fallen angel than anything else, but it was also nice to have a restful night’s sleep in my own bed.  I woke up feeling like there was nothing I couldn’t handle.  Demons?  No problem, bring ‘em on!

The sound of laughter caught my attention as I daydreamed between the sheets, and I stepped into my fuzzy slippers and matching robe before venturing into the living room.  Sam sat on the couch, swaddled in a comfy blanket, while Daphne sat beside him, holding up a steaming mug.  For a moment I watched them together, the gentle way she took care of him, blowing across the top of the mug before bringing it to his lips, and the way his eyes never left her face.  I had almost decided to retreat back into the bedroom to give them a little more privacy when Daphne spotted me.

“Hey there, sleeping beauty, glad to see you’ve finally decided to join us in the land of the living.”

“Hi guys, sorry, I was um… sleeping.”  I decided not to go into more detail than that in present company, though I fully expected Daphne to wrangle the basic details out of me later.  “How are you feeling today, Sam?”  I asked, with not a small amount of trepidation, remembering how sick he’d gotten on the first beer he’d tried.

“I am a little under the weather, thank you, but Daphne has been very kind in tending to me.  She insists if I imbibe soup it will cure me.”  He nodded towards the mug that held the telltale golden soup, little noodle stars floating at the top.

“I could help you with that you know.” I wiggled my fingers at him but he shook his head to my surprise.

“Thank you, no, I’ll be fine.”

“That must be some good soup…”  I decided to give it a pass though in favor of strong coffee.  “What brings you over here, Daph?”  Was she there to see Sam?

“Don’t you remember?  You said we should get together and do some early Christmas shopping before the malls get too crazy.  But I figured you needed your beauty sleep when I saw the shape poor Sam was in.”  She leaned forward with the mug again and Sam sipped at it dutifully.

“Oh, shopping, right!”  I’d completely forgotten. I still wasn’t even ready for Thanksgiving let alone Christmas.  Which reminded me… I had to call Ben.  “Give me a minute to get some coffee. I’ll hop in the shower and I’ll be good to go.”

“No rush, I’m sure the stores will still be open when we get there,” Daphne smiled and that’s when it hit me.  She was totally into Sam.  I knew he was a little taken with her, but I had no idea she was interested in him that way.

“Okay.”  I puttered around in the kitchen, making my coffee and toasted a cinnamon raisin bagel with peanut butter, watching them surreptitiously.  I don’t think they even noticed when I took my coffee cup and retreated to the bathroom for that shower.  While I stood under the hot spray of water, I tried to decide how I felt about the new development.

On the one hand I was happy for them, Sam needed more friends to link him to the current age and Daphne could definitely stand to go out with a decent guy for a change.  At the same time, I knew she’d be in for a lot of frustration in dealing with his… issues.  Deciding in the end it wasn’t up to me whether they wanted to explore a relationship or not, I focused on the shower and finding some comfortable clothes to wear for the shopping wars.

With a quick glance at the clock, I picked up the phone, dialing Ben’s cellphone number.  With any luck he’d be grabbing lunch and have a few minutes to talk.  As the phone rang, I ran over a few different opening lines in my head, trying to decide what tone to go for.  Nothing too cheerful, but nothing too grave either.  I wanted to see him in person to have ‘the talk’, but I didn’t want to give him the impression I was ready to kiss and make up either.  It turned out to be a moot point though as his voicemail picked up, and I left him a message to give me a call when he had a chance.

“So… mall or outlet stores?  Or secret option number three?”  I asked as I stepped out of the bedroom to find Daphne sitting in the living room all alone, paging through a magazine.  “What happened to Sam?”

“I have no idea.  He got a strange look on his face, muttered a few words of an apology, and he was out of here before I could think to ask him where he was going,” she shrugged, and I could see the disappointment etched on her features.

“I’m sorry, Daph, I thought about inviting him to go with us too.  But maybe this is a good thing?  It’ll be a girls’ day out, you and me and an orgy of consumerism.  What do you say?” I grinned encouragingly and she laughed.

“I don’t think I can afford an orgy, but I might be able to manage a threesome until my bonus check comes.”

“That’s the spirit!”  With that, we got on the road, deciding to take Daphne’s car since it was more reliable than mine.  I was a serious bargain hunter myself, and hoping to find some good deals to help stretch my tight budget as well.  I already knew what I wanted to get for Matty, but I was still saving up for that.  Mom’s gift I always bought online so I could have it shipped directly to her.  That left plenty of gifts to be bought for Daphne, Parker, and everyone at work.

I’d planned to look for something for Ben too, but that would have to wait until I had a better idea of whether or not he was still on speaking terms with me after our conversation.  The question also begged, what did you buy a fallen angel for Christmas?  I had two of them to shop for, their tastes as different as night and day.

I had to give myself a mental boot to the head for dwelling on what to buy Adam for Christmas when I hadn’t even broken up with Ben yet.  What kind of a person was I?

“You’re awfully quiet today,” Daphne observed after she got on the freeway and I gave her a distracted smile.

“Sorry, I guess I was lost in my own little world there for a bit.  Hey, remind me later to look for a leather repair kit for the couch.  It’s starting to rip by one of the seams on the arm.”

“Your couch isn’t made of leather.”

“Glue is glue,” I shrugged, looking out the window as something caught the edge of my attention, but was gone too quick for me to process what it was.

“Hello… Earth to Mercy… what is up with you today?  You missed a perfectly good insult.”  Daphne seemed offended by my lack of offense.

“What?  Sorry, I’ve been trying to decide what to do about Ben and Adam.  I mean I hate that Ben’s in the dark about what’s going on, and it’s not something I can really talk to him about over the phone.”  If I could even get him on the phone.

“I thought you told Ben all about the angel stuff?”

“I did, I meant about what’s going on since then.”

“Sam told me a little about what happened to you with the demons, are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m alright.  It wasn’t exactly the most fun I’ve ever had, but I survived it, that’s all I can ask for, I guess.”  Knowing Sam only had part of the story, I filled her in on the most salient points of what had happened in Midian.  To her credit, Daphne didn’t interrupt me once, listening with rapt attention.  Though I did question whether or not I should have waited until she wasn’t driving before telling her, when she almost rear ended the car in front of us after traffic stopped suddenly.

“And Ben doesn’t know about that part yet?”

“No, he knows about it.  He sorta flipped out when I told him last night and he walked out.”

“Ooh, that’s rough.  Maybe you guys can sort things out after he cools off a little bit?”

“That was my plan, but now… I don’t think things are salvageable, not anymore.”  It was getting easier to deal with the more I said it out loud, but I still wasn’t looking forward to the conversation.  I didn’t want him to hate me, and if I was him, I was pretty sure I’d hate me.

“Because of Adam?”

That’s why I love Daphne, she always sees to the heart of the matter.  “Adam is a big part of it, but not entirely.”  Things had started to self destruct with Ben before I gave myself to Adam, partly because I’d waited too long to bring Ben up to speed on what was going on.

“Do you love him?”

“You know it’s crazy, but I do.  One minute he’s driving me insane with his obnoxious behavior and leaving me in a nest of demons and the next he’s telling me no man will ever love me the way he loves me.  It’s enough to turn my brain into oatmeal.  It’s… it’s almost demeaning for someone to have that much power over me.  But what can I do?  I’ve never felt like this about anyone before, Daphne, this goes way beyond puppy love.  What I feel for Adam is the real deal.”

“Actually, I meant Ben…”

“Oh.”  That brought me up short.

“There you go then, that must make things easier.  If you’re in love with Adam you can’t be with Ben anymore.”

I loved how simple that made it for her, and in a way I could agree it was.  But that didn’t mean I wasn’t in for a world of heartache with Adam if I let him become my whole life.  I did not want to sit around waiting for the time when he could come to me, living for my dreams.  It sounded inherently weak, and I hate any weakness within myself.  “Yeah, but he’s not here, he’s never here for me.  What kind of future is that?  Am I setting myself up for a great big letdown in pinning my hopes on a life with Adam?”

“You can’t help who you love, Mercy.”  Daphne gave a romantic sigh and I knew she wasn’t quite catching what my objections were all about.  I could easily picture her waiting forever and a day if that’s what it took to be with her true love.  Maybe she was the perfect match for Sam?

The sound caught my attention again, louder that time and my head came up, looking for the source.  “Do you hear that?  Is your car making a weird noise?”

“Hear what?”

I turned off the radio, listening carefully, but it didn’t sound like the kind of noise a car would make.  It sounded almost like…horns.  Rolling down the window the sound grew louder and I stuck my head outside like a dog on a trip to the park.  It was a long, steady note, like the call to a hunt rather than the melody of a song.  “There, do you hear it?  It’s like a horn blowing in the distance.”

“I don’t hear anything but the wind.”

“Seriously?  How can you not…” The note stopped and I scowled, my eyes starting to tear from the sting of the wind whipping past.  “It stopped.  Can you tell it stopped at least?”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about, but you’re letting all the heat out, roll up the window.”  I did as she asked, but couldn’t help but feel a little… strange - as if I expected to hear the horns start up again any second.  “Are you going to talk to him then?”

“Talk to who?” I blinked, realizing I had no idea who she meant.

“Seriously, what is going on with you?  Are you sure they didn’t do something to you in the demon world?  Or maybe Azazael found a way to get into your brain and…”

“Shut up a minute…” My hand came up as the sound started up again, stronger that time.

“Nice!” Daphne’s cheeks turned pink with indignation but I was too busy trying to track the source of the sound.

“Can you take the next exit?  That one?  Quick, quick, quick!”  I all but grabbed the wheel and Daphne wrenched it to the side, almost losing control of the car when she overcorrected and ended up on the shoulder.

“What the hell?” she demanded but I was still focused on the sound.  And yes, I fully realize now that Adam’s behavior was starting to rub off on me.  My only defense is… okay, I have no defense, bond or no bond, I shouldn’t have been so rude to her.  All I knew was, I had to find the source of that horn.  It felt like it was calling directly to me.

“Turn right at the light, I think it’s coming from that direction.”  I pointed towards a copse of trees in the distance, beyond the city.

“You want us to go to the park?”

“Um, yeah, to start with.”  My toes tapping with impatience, I just hoped we’d find it before the sound stopped again.

“What about shopping?”

“Will you forget about the stupid shopping?  This is important!”

“Okay, okay, hold your horses, I can’t move any faster in this traffic,” she retorted and I realized I was acting like an asshat.

“I’m sorry, I can’t explain it, I just need to get there.”  Once we were headed in the right direction, some of my agitation eased and I shot Daphne an apologetic look.

“I still have no idea what you’re hearing.  Maybe it’s like a sound only dogs can hear?”

Or angels.  Was I hearing something meant for angelic ears only?  “Keep going Daph, it feels like it’s coming from that park up ahead.”  Obediently she turned into the long driveway that led to the park nestled among the trees.  There was a small playground area with walking trails and a playing field that was mostly empty at that time of year.  A boat launch lay at the end of the road next to the lake.  “Down there, by the water.”  We were getting closer, I could feel it.

As soon as she stopped the car, I threw open my door, freezing when the sound cut off abruptly.  “Damn it!”  I could still feel the pull even without the call of the horn.  It came from a small island in the center of the lake, about a hundred yards across the water.  Obscured by trees, I couldn’t see if there was anyone on the island itself or who was making all the racket.

“What’s the matter?” Daphne asked, getting out of the car.

“The horn stopped.”

“I don’t see anyone around.  Maybe whoever it was went home?”

“No… they’re out here somewhere.  I just have to find them.”

Chapter Sixteen

“Mercy, there’s nothing out here and it’s kinda cold,” Daphne hugged her arms close to her body.

“I have to get to that island.   I’m sure that’s where it came from.”  Only I had no idea how to get out there.  There were no boats around.  In fact, that entire area of the park was completely deserted.  I started down towards the water’s edge with no real plan in mind and Daphne chased after me.

“Mercy, you can’t… hey!”  Something in her voice made me turn back to look at her despite the pull to the island, and I saw her standing there frozen in place, a look of comical surprise on her face.

“What’s the matter?”

“I can’t… something is keeping me from going forward,” she frowned, backing up a step and trying again a foot over to the side.  “It’s like there’s an invisible wall.”

“Weird.”  I hurried back to her, crossing back and forth through the unseen barrier with no problems.  “Here, try taking my hand.”  I held my hand out but she shrank away from it.  “What’s the matter?”

“I don’t want to.  I feel a little strange, like… maybe we should get out of here.”

I looked between Daphne and the lure of the island, my feet already backing towards the water.  “I can’t, Daph.  I have to go and check it out.  Wait here for me and I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

“How are you going to get there?”

That was the million dollar question.  I didn’t fancy a swim in the cold November water but there didn’t seem to be another way to get over there.  It was a cinch any angels in the area would be using their wings, and I spared a moment to check the sky but it was too overcast to see much.  “Wait here and maybe have the heater going, okay?”  I sidled closer to the water.

“Are you crazy?  You’ll freeze to death if you go in the water!”

I didn’t know what else to do, so I ignored her, my foot squishing in the muddy rocks as I got right up to the water’s edge.  Preparing myself for the rush of cold water, it took me a few steps to realize I wasn’t sinking into the lake.  I stood on top of it.  With a gasp I froze, raising one foot and stomping it to see if it would splash, but nothing happened.  Chalk up another of my nearly useless party tricks, I could walk on water.

Daphne didn’t start to notice until I was several feet out and I could hear her trying to get my attention from the shore.  Instead I forged on, not sure if it would last the entire time. I wanted to get as close to the island as possible before I accidentally plunged into the water.  With that thought in mind, I sprinted the last several yards until my feet were on solid ground again, digging the toes of my shoes into the dirt to satisfy that I was actually on the ground instead of hovering over it.

With a little wave to Daphne to let her know I’d arrived safely, I started into the trees, the call even stronger on that side of the water, even though I couldn’t hear the actual horn anymore. The island itself wasn’t huge, and I didn’t see any structures on it or a dock for boats to tie up there.  The trees were dense though, and I had to pick my way carefully through the underbrush as there were no trails to follow.

A rush of air was my only warning as Sam landed beside me.  “What are you doing here?”  I asked automatically, though I could guess he’d heard the same call as I did.

“I could ask you the same question,” he replied, his voice hushed as he looked around carefully.

“I heard that sound, like a horn calling me, so I came to check it out.  It’s an angel thing, isn’t it?”

“You heard that?” he blinked.  “Nevermind.  Go home, Mercy.  You don’t belong here.”  Sam strode away from me at a brisk pace.

Like I was gonna turn around and head for home.  He should have known me much better than that.  I chased after him, knowing instinctively he was headed in the right direction.  “What is it?  A meeting of the Fallen Angels Club and I can’t come?”

“Not fallen angels,” he said shortly and I could understand why he was so tense.  It was a meeting of the big boys, and I was strictly persona non grata with them.

“What are you doing here then?”  He didn’t seem like the type to flaunt the rules.

“I am not joining them. I am merely trying to…”

“You’re spying!” I hissed back at him, tickled beyond belief to find he wasn’t above something petty like that, and a flush of color stole up the side of his cheeks.

“I only want to know if their plans will affect those I care about.”

Me.  I could read that on his face plainly enough.  He wanted to know if they were holding a pow wow about my situation.  “Okay then, I’m coming too.”

“They will see you.”

“Not if I’m real sneaky like,” I grinned, slowing instinctively as the trees started to thin out.

And then I spotted them.  Angels.  Gobs of ‘em.

A dozen or so angels stood alone or in pairs, chatting amiably like it was a church social.  Their auras gleamed against the gray, overcast day, casting the clearing in a halo of golden light almost as if it were a sunny day.  “Wow, what are they all doing here?” I whispered, ducking behind a tree.

“They came in response to Gabriel’s horn, as you and I did.”

That begged the question, “which one is Gabriel?”

“The one with the horn, duh, standing over there by Nathanael.”

Sometimes I liked Sam better before he picked up on modern qualities like sarcasm.  “Oh,” I whispered back shortly.  The pair of them stood next to each other but didn’t appear to be talking, Nathanael looking stern as ever, Gabriel serious, but not quite as intimidating as his brother.  As we watched, Gabriel lifted the horn to his lips and blew out another impossibly long note without taking a breath, and the pull towards the clearing grew impossible to ignore.  “I’m gonna go check things out.”

Sam immediately caught hold of my arm, stepping into my path.  “Mercy, you can’t go out there, it’s forbidden.”

“Then why are they calling me?”  Maybe the horn didn’t discriminate against the Fallen or weird hybrids like I was.  All I knew was, I had to get into that meadow and find out what all the fuss was about.  Side stepping around him, I tugged my arm free.

“They’ll see you,” Sam hissed after me but I was undeterred.

“I know but… don’t you feel it?  I have to go.”  For a moment I thought he might try to tackle me to the ground, but instead he retreated back into the shelter of the trees as I approached the clearing.  As soon as I was spotted, all eyes were on me with varying degrees of shock and surprise.  Most of them appeared curious, but more than a few were openly disapproving of my arrival and I started to rethink the wisdom of venturing into their midst unannounced.  The gathering parted, giving me a wide berth as if I’d brought contagion with me.

Not that I got far, as Nathanael stepped up to block my path.  “Leave this place,” he ordered imperiously, but I wasn’t about to let him intimidate me.

“Hey, you’re the ones that called. I came to see what was going on.”

“You were not summoned, the call was for the heavenly host only.”

“Then what am I doing here?  Obviously I was summoned or how would I even know you’re having a jamboree in the first place?” I pointed out, and I could see the effect my words had on the crowd.

“She speaks the truth,” one of the angels nodded, but Nathanael wasn’t having any of it.

“The call is sometimes heard by the Fallen, it does not mean they are among the chosen.”

Another stepped forward.  His long dark hair and close cropped beard reminded me a little of the big JC, but he had quite a bit more muscle on his frame.  Dressed in a cashmere turtleneck and dress slacks all in earth tones, he was the epitome of refined grace and his voice was cultured and well spoken.  “She is not of the Fallen, and she shares the Grace of God.  Should she not be privy to his words?”  I liked the guy on sight and I was glad to have him in my corner.

“This is not to be borne! Will we allow our ranks to be polluted by this abomination?” Nathanael demanded, and I was afraid he might physically toss me out of the clearing in another moment.  But at Gabriel’s light touch he quieted, his face dark and glowering.  I had unconsciously taken a step backwards in the face of Nate’s anger but forced myself to hold my ground as Gabriel approached.

“I haven’t done anything wrong.  But if you want me to leave… I will,” I said respectfully, all of the sarcasm falling out of my tone.  Unlike Nathanael, who rubbed me the wrong way from day one with his pompous attitude, Gabriel radiated authority but also a gentleness.  It soothed my prickly temper, and I found I really craved his approval.  All looked to Gabriel who studied me with those big blue eyes, a touch of melancholy to his expression.  It made me wonder; was he bummed because I interrupted his party, or because of something else?

He approached slowly, coming to stop a couple of feet away from me.  I expected him to say something, but he just stood there looking at me.  Could Gabriel read minds?  Was he trying to judge the quality of my soul based on the Grace?  Was he wondering if he was going to miss Monday Night Football by the time all of it was over?  I couldn’t tell what was going on in that head of his, but he seemed to come to a decision, his head bowing the slightest of nods before he turned and strode away.

Apparently I’d passed some kind of test, because the other angels clustered around me then, and I was reminded that I really was like a shiny new toy to them.  Most kept a respectful distance as though they were afraid to commit to actually choosing a side, but a few came closer to introduce themselves, their voices full of varying degrees of reverence and amusement.  I felt a little like the belle of the ball; if the ball was full of glowing sexy angels.  I’d never seen so much perfection in one place.  Ever.  Of course I hadn’t heard of any of them in particular, until one approached, the one with long dark hair who had stood up to Nathanael in my defense.

“Greetings,” he nodded formally.

“Hi,” I nodded back.

“You are well?”

“Yes, I’m… well.  I guess.”  It seemed an odd question after my outburst but then I remembered they weren’t all that big on small talk.  At least that one didn’t look like he was afraid to talk to me.  “Hey, I’m a little rusty on my angel mind reading, is it actually okay for me to be here?  ‘Cause I could leave if it’s gonna cause a problem.”  I wasn’t sure how much leeway I was given from that slight nod out of Gabriel.

“No, you were given leave to attend.  Though as I understand it, it pertains to this gathering only.”

“Wow, I must have missed that part of the message.  You got all that from a single nod?”

He chuckled at that, a deep rich sound that made my stomach flutter.  “We are all familiar with Gabriel’s ways, he is not one for words.”

“Yeah, I’m getting that.  I looked over to where Gabriel watched over the crowd with that same impassive expression on his face.  Was there supposed to be a formal announcement or were they waiting for me to leave to get back to angelic business?  Deciding not to worry about it, I turned my attention back to my tall, new friend.  “Listen, thanks for your help back there with Nathanael, that guy’s got it in for me big time, I appreciate the support.”

“Of course, I could do nothing else, Merceline,” he sketched a half bow.

“It’s Mercy,” I corrected him automatically.  “Does everyone here know who I am?”

“Oh yes, word of your… evolution has been spoken of in the highest of places.”

“And the lowest,” I muttered, not at all happy with my lack of privacy those days.

“You speak of your capture by Raum.  I was both pleased and impressed to learn of your escape.”

There he went again, knowing all about my business.  It was a little flattering, but mostly it was kinda creepy, the idea that there were a bunch of people out there knowing the ins and outs of my daily life.  “Seriously, how do you know all of this?”  Sam had spoken of the angels watching over me, was he one of them?

“I made it my business to know.  You don’t seem to understand the impact you’ve had on our world, my dear lady.”

“Oh?”

“Oh yes, in all the years of our existence, there has never been one such as you.  You are…”

“Yeah, I know, I’m new.  I get that a lot,” I sighed and he chuckled again.

“Do not take it to heart that many of my kind have not accepted you, as a whole we resist change.”

“That’s okay, I never set out to be Miss Popular.  Actually I’m a little more worried about the ones that like me a little too much.”

“Could anyone ever care too much, dear lady?”

Uh oh.  I recognized the look of infatuation that started to gather on his face and I wanted to nip that in the bud.  “Yeah well, I’m taken, I mean really taken,” I added quickly, gratified when he got the message and stopped giving me those puppy dog eyes.  “I don’t appreciate being kidnapped by demons who are attracted to my Grace or fallen angels who want to use me to escape eternal damnation either.  By the way, shouldn’t it be your guys’ job to make sure that doesn’t happen?  He’s your prisoner, right?”

“You speak of Azazael.”

“Yep, that’s the one.  What kind of a prison is it if he can escape into the Ether whenever he wants or jump into someone’s body?”  It seemed like a flawed system to me.  Sure his body was chained to a rock, but it obviously wasn’t doing any good if his mind could escape so easily.

“He has come to you in the Ether?”

Maybe it was petty of me, but I couldn’t help but feel a little jolt of happiness for having caught an all knowing angel by surprise.  “Oh, so you don’t know every little thing about me after all, do you?” I gloated.

“My apologies, the Ether is difficult for us to monitor.”

“That’s okay.”  It was better for me if they didn’t keep too close of an eye on the Ether anyway.  It left me feeling less like I was being watched at every turn when I got to spend time with Adam.

“You should not have to bear the brunt of Azazael’s avarice or schemes.  Nathanael!” he called out, and I almost wished I’d kept my mouth shut.  But if they could help me with my Azazael problem, that would simple my life up big time.  “Were you aware that Azazael is stalking this child in the Ether?”

“I am not her keeper, I leave that to you,” he replied with disdain.

My brows came up at that one.  The guy was my keeper?  Did I have another guardian angel?  Not that I was complaining, but how exactly did I rate that?  Did he get an assignment to watch over me, or was it his idea all on his own?  With an advocate in my corner, I spoke up again.  “Yeah, but you don’t want him to escape right?  Isn’t there something you can do to keep him from coming after me?”

“Even if I deigned to concern myself with your plight, we are bound by God’s instructions, unable to take action without direction.  There is little that can be done against Azazael unless and until he actually escapes his bonds.”

The sonofabitch actually looked happy about the loophole that allowed Azazael to keep tormenting me with no retribution.  I had to wonder, was he always like that?  Or was it just me who got his knickers in a knot?  While I pretty much expected a response like that from good ol’ Nate, my new champion clearly was not.

“Still, you cannot believe it is His will for Azazael to escape,” he pressed, but Nathanael wasn’t interested.

“I have learned not to try and anticipate God’s will and I would caution you to do the same,” Nathanael replied stiffly.  “If you feel that strongly about it, take up a petition, you know the proper channels.”

“I shall.”

“Fine, may we get back to business now?”  The air fairly crackled with enmity as the two angels squared off, but my friend was the first one to back down.

“I humbly await your pronouncement,” he gave a low bow before stalking off.

“That guy is a total asshat,” I muttered under my breath and the angel standing next to me gave a nervous titter of laughter.  He soon quieted under Nathanael’s disapproving glare though and we all sobered, waiting for whatever angel business was on the docket.

“There is a report of a prophet near San Salvador, Gagiel, you are chosen to respond.”

“As my Lord commands,” Gagiel nodded.

“Zethar, have you a report on the situation in Portland?”

My interest peaked by the proximity of the location, I paid particular attention to Zethar’s report about witch activity in the Portland Metro Area.  The short and skinny of it was, there was no proof anyone was trafficking with the devil, so they moved on.   That’s how it went, assignments and reports on various activities going on all over the world.

Overall it was a lot more boring than I would have thought.  Most reports were disproven as anything supernatural and even when something interesting was mentioned, they didn’t talk about taking steps to correct it, they were just cataloged for the report.  Or maybe they were leery of talking about the good stuff in front of me?

Before you go thinking I’m being big headed about the effect of my being there, I can totally prove it.  All along I got the feeling Nathanael couched his terms in the most general sense possible, keeping details vague, but it was never more noticeable than when he began his final report.

After a pointed look in my direction, he addressed the group.  “There is a report that you know who has made his presence known at a certain club in Los Angeles…”

I couldn’t keep quiet any longer.  “Oh, come on, you know who?  Seriously?  What are we chasing after evil wizards now?  Like I can’t figure out who you’re talking about.”  I couldn’t help but roll my eyes.  “I may not be an angel but I’m not a moron.  Either tell it like it is or ask me to leave.”

“I did ask you to leave,” he replied, his teeth grinding together.  “And yet you remain.”

“Fine, I’ll go.  This was so not what I expected when I heard the call of the horn.  No offense.” I turned to offer that to Gabriel who watched me closely.  “I thought you guys helped people?  All I’m hearing is a lot of surveillance.  You guys are the biggest peeping Tom’s…” With that I turned on my heel and stalked away.  I hadn’t gone more than a dozen feet when my new friend fell into step beside me.

“Have no fear, I will petition on your behalf.  Azazael will not be allowed to torment you so.”

“Thanks, I really appreciate it.  I’d try talking to the Big Guy myself, but it’s a little out of my way.” I gave him a grateful smile.  “I’m sorry, I didn’t catch your name.”

“A thousand apologies, my dear lady.  I am Raziel.”

I felt as though I’d been socked in the stomach, and it took long seconds before I could suck in a breath to form coherent words.  “You’re Raziel?”

“I can see my reputation precedes me.”

“No shit,” slipped out before I could stop myself from swearing in front of an angel.  Raziel.  The Angel of Death who had brought so much heartache to Adam and Sam both.  Why the hell was he so keen on keeping tabs on me?  Was he waiting for the time when he’d have to put me down too?  If it wasn’t something like that, then why hadn’t he introduced himself to me in the first place?

The profound look of sadness in his eyes gave me pause.  He was nothing like I’d imagined him.  I suppose I’d pictured someone more like Nathanael, full of righteous anger.  Or maybe a goose-stepping soldier with more brawn than brains, carrying out the Lord’s orders without regard for the destruction it would cause.  But he wasn’t like that at all.  In fact, I’d been well on the way to considering him a friend and ally.  “Look, I have to go.  I shouldn’t be talking to you.”

“I understand.  I won’t trouble you any longer,” Raziel nodded, bowing slightly he turned away.  Ugh, I felt like crap and I had to mash my lips together to keep from calling him back.  But I owed it to both Adam and Sam not to associate with the guy, didn’t I?  Still… he’d been nothing but nice to me in a pretty tense environment, taking on Nathanael like that.

“Wait…”  I turned around and chased after him.  “I’m sorry, you caught me by surprise, okay?”  Raziel stopped walking but didn’t turn to face me, and I had to jog around him.  His shoulders slumped miserably and I felt awful for making him feel like that.  “How come you didn’t tell me who you were from the start?”

“Because I feared a reaction just as this one.  You have judged me, and there is little I can say now to change your opinion.”

“When you put it like that…” I frowned, squirming on the inside because he was right.  I had totally judged him without letting him give his side of the story.  The trouble was, I wasn’t sure I wanted to hear his side of the story.  What if I decided he was an okay guy despite what he’d done?  How could I justify that to Adam?

Maybe he wasn’t a bad person, but I wasn’t sure it was such a good idea, the two of us being friends.  “Listen, I do appreciate you sticking up for me, but you have to understand where I’m coming from.  But for a couple thousand years, that could have been me you killed when you came after Adam’s lady.”

“Adam has broken no covenant, you are no longer a mortal woman.”

“Yeah, but my entire being here is an abomination, depending on who you talk to.”  My eyes flicked over to where Nathanael stood.  “What happens if the news comes down the pipeline some day that it’s my turn?  Will you kill me as easily?”

“Killing is never easily done,” he replied with a pained look.  “And I pray that day will never come.”

“But if it does…?”

Chapter Seventeen

The question hung heavily in the air between us, and from his silence I had my answer.  “Yeah, that’s what I thought.  I’m sorry if I find it a little hard to become best buddies with a guy who might eventually be my executioner.”

“I understand,” he nodded sadly, and once more I felt like I’d stepped on a puppy’s ears.

“But… that doesn’t mean I hate you or anything,” I added, gratified to see him perk up at that.  “I understand you did what you did for a reason, and it wasn’t out of malice, but it hurt two people who are very important to me.”  I felt the need to add that too, not letting him off the hook entirely.  “How about we start fresh here?  Leave the past where it is and worry about the future when it comes?”  There might be hell to pay when Adam found out, but I couldn’t help but like Raziel.  Hey, I would take all the help I could get, between Azazael and Raum both being after me, another friend couldn’t hurt.

Raziel’s noble face broke into a broad smile.  “I would like that very much.”

“Okay, good.”  I instantly felt better about the situation and broke into a smile to match his.  “But I should be going now, I think Nathanael has more orders to give and you should get back.”

“I don’t take my orders from Nathanael,” he scoffed.

“Oh?  Then why are you here?”

“Because I wanted to meet you.”

I wasn’t sure how to take that, and I really did have to go, so I decided to ignore it for the time being.  “Well, it was nice to meet you, Raziel, but my friend is waiting for me so… I’ll see you around.”  I turned around to leave and nearly ran right into Gabriel who stood behind me.  “Oh, excuse me,” I said automatically even though really, it was his fault for standing so close.

Would I get the riot act read to me for breaking up the meeting?  Would he have a personal message for me from the guy upstairs?  Would he even say anything at all?  I seriously contemplated a mumbled apology and darting around him as he did none of those things, standing there staring at me with that inscrutable look on his face.  He reached for my hand and I was so surprised, I didn’t object when he lifted it straight up into the air, high over my head.  My mouth dropped open as a rumble of thunder sounded overhead and with a crackle of lightning, a shining sword appeared in my hand.

“Holy cow…” slipped out, as I pulled the sword down to check it out.  “Is this mine?  For reals?”  A faint smile was all I got from him in response and I took that to mean yes.  “This is the coolest thing ever!”  I quashed the urge to give him a hug in thanks, but my smile was a mile wide as I held the sword comfortably in my hand.  Wait ‘til the demons tried to mess with me again!  I’d be prepared next time.  Gabriel’s smile broadened and he actually winked at me ,so quickly I almost thought I imagined it, before launching himself into the air in a flurry of snow white wings.

“Thank you!” I called after him, noting that the other angels followed suit, taking to the skies.  “I guess the meeting’s over,” I murmured to myself as I stood alone in the clearing.

“Hey, Sam!  Check out what I got!”  Feeling almost giddy, I ran towards where I hoped Sam waited at the edge of the trees.  I know I broke a rule, running with a sharp object in my hand, but damn it was cool!  Not that I knew a thing about how to use it, but it felt good in my hand.  I felt safer and more powerful, even though I was more likely to hurt myself on the thing than anyone else.  Sam stepped out of the trees, amusement curving his lips.

“I see you made some new friends.”

I wasn’t sure if he meant that innocently, or if it was a dig because he saw me talking to Raziel.  A month ago I would have taken him at his word, but his forays into sarcasm left me wondering.  “Yeah, Gabriel gave me this.”  I held the sword up and he side stepped it.

“Be careful with that until you learn how to use it.”

“Would you teach me?”  It stood to reason he’d be pretty good with a sword.  Adam too, but I had a feeling any sword lessons Adam gave me would pretty rapidly devolve into something else.

“If you like.”

“Cool.  ‘Cause I don’t think it’d look so badass if I accidentally cut my own leg off with this thing the first time I tried to use it,” I grinned, giving it another experimental swing.

“Have a care.” His hands came up, his brow furrowing in an almost pained expression.  “It will be very sharp indeed, and while I can heal your minor cuts, it will be very difficult to reattach limbs.”

That was a sobering thought, and I brought the point down to the ground.  “You got it Obi-Wan.  You lead and I’ll follow.  I’ll even call you Master if you like,” I winked at him.  Sam stared at me blankly and I was reminded that no matter how much progress he was making with his assimilation into the present, there were still gaping holes in his pop culture internal reference.  “Remind me when we get home to watch the entire Star Wars saga from start to finish.”  Daphne might like that, a movie-a-thon with popcorn and junk food…  “Oh crap, Daphne!  She must be freaking out!”

“Daphne is here?” Sam blinked in astonishment.  Apparently he’d been too distracted by the call to notice her back at the shore.

“Yes, she’s waiting in the park.  At least, I hope she’s still waiting for me.”

“We should definitely go to her, allay her fears.”

So adorable.  “Okay,” I agreed readily.  “How about a lift?”  I wasn’t sure the walking on water bit would work again and it would be a bitch to try and swim with a sword clenched in my teeth.  Sam hesitated for a moment before giving a brisk nod and I felt a little jolt of exhilaration at the prospect of not only seeing his wings but flying.  “Oh, what about the sword?”  I didn’t want to accidentally cut him.

“Here, let me take it from you.”  Sam held out his hand and the moment I passed it over to him it disappeared.

“Hey!  What did you do to it?” I demanded, hoping that was done on purpose and I hadn’t lost my new toy already.

“I did nothing, but you can relax, it’s no biggie.  You can retrieve it anytime you like, though I don’t recommend it while we’re in the air.”

“Sweet!  The same way you can?”  That would definitely come in handy, otherwise I’d have to figure out how to bring it with me to work and I wasn’t sure Parker would go for that.

“Yes, exactly.  Hold tight now.”  I wrapped my arms around Sam’s neck and he held me close.  I was aware of the flutter of wings and then we were in the air.  “Make yourself dim now, we mustn’t be seen like this.”  With a nod I focused on removing myself from human eyes as we flew across the water.  All too soon it was over and we stood on the rocky bank of the lake.  For the first time I got a real look at his wings fully extended, and they were truly beautiful.  A different kind of beauty from Adam’s dark wings, Sam’s were pristine white, like a dove’s, and they flexed before he noticed I was looking at them and he willed them away in a rush of air.

“Aw… I don’t see what the big deal is, they’re beautiful.”

“Mercy…” He looked acutely uncomfortable with the praise, but then his eyes lit upon Daphne who bound out of the car.

“Hey!” she called out, waving from the parking lot.  With a start, she realized there was nothing keeping her from joining us on the rocky beach anymore and she ran down to join us.  “What happened to you?  I was about to call the cops and report you missing, but then I figured that might be a bad idea.  Hi, Sam,” she smiled brightly.

“There was a whole group of angels on the island, that’s what the sound was. Gabriel called them for a meeting.  I sorta crashed it.”

“Ah, that makes sense,” Daphne nodded. “What happened?  Did they toss you out?”

“Mercy was given a great honor.  Gabriel himself bestowed her with a sword.”

“Let’s see it,” she prompted, looking curiously between the pair of us.

“Yeah, Sam, how do we get it back from wherever it disappeared to?”

“The sword will come when you call,” Sam replied as if that made perfect sense, but I had no idea how to do it.

“Okay, how do I call it?”

Sam’s mouth opened and then closed again without actually saying anything as he considered how to answer my question.  “I don’t know, I have never put much thought into it, you simply do.”

“Super,” I muttered, wondering if my spiffy new sword was lost forever.  “So I just call for it, huh?”  Stretching out my arm, I tried to envision the sword in my hand.  Nothing.  “Shazam!” I tried again with a flick of the wrist.  “Sword on!”  Still nothing.

“Here watch me, it’s like this,” Sam held out his hand and the glowing sword materialized in it almost immediately, drawing a gasp of wonder from Daphne.

“Yeah, like that helps,” I muttered, trying to mimic his hand movement, but nothing worked.  While I watched, Sam made the sword appear and disappear several times.  “Okay, now you’re just mocking me.” I held my hand up, enough was enough.  “They should have sent this thing with instructions.”

“I have an idea,” Sam said suddenly and that was the only warning I got before he drew his sword and brought it down towards my head.  My arm came up as a reflex and the sword appeared in my hand, coming to my defense even though Sam’s blow stopped about six inches from my head.

“Christ!” I gasped, heart pounding from the rush of adrenaline.  “Warn me the next time before you do that.”

“That would have defeated the purpose, don’t you think?” he chuckled and Daphne joined him in laughter.

“I hardly think you giving me a heart attack is funny,” I grumbled, but I was pleased to feel the heft of the sword back in my hand.

“Oh come on, Mercy.  It worked, didn’t it?”  Daphne pointed out and I had to admit she was right.

“Yeah, quick thinking there, Sam,” I grinned.  “So, you’ll train me on the secrets of the ninja now?” I waved the sword in front of me but Sam shook his head.

“Perhaps you should focus first on trying to produce the sword without a sword coming at you.”

“Are you kidding?  I’m never letting this baby out of my sight again.  No fair putting it back into limbo or whatever you did with it before.”

“It wasn’t I that put the sword out of play, it will disappear whenever you let go of it.”

“Really?”  That might prove inconvenient if I couldn’t figure out how to turn it on and off in a hurry.  “That seems like a strange feature.”

“In this way, no one but you may wield it.  The moment it passes from your hand to another, or you drop it, or it’s taken from you, it ceases to exist on this plane.  Then you may simply recall it again.  It’s quite handy actually.”  He sounded like he had personal experience with it and I could see where that would be useful in a real battle.  I wanted to test it out by letting go of it, but I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to get it back.  Still, I’d never get anywhere if I never tried, right?  I opened my hand, letting the sword fall, and it disappeared instantly.  Unfortunately getting it back proved to be tricky and I wasn’t able to recall it.

“I’ll have to practice with it a bit I guess.  Ah well, everyone needs a hobby, right?”  As long as it appeared in a pinch, I was happy.  Dimly, I recalled that Matty used to have some wooden Kendo swords from when he decided to take up martial arts for about five minutes.  Maybe I could borrow one of them to practice in a less lethal way?

“What kind of meeting were they having with the angels?”  Daphne asked, probably bored with watching me open and close my hand over and over again.

“Oh, it was kind of like a briefing, pretty boring actually.  That reminds me though, I was gonna ask.  Why did they send an angel to go check out a prophet?” I asked Sam, who absently twirled his sword in an impressive way.

“They want to know if he’s a true prophet or merely insane.”

“What will happen to him if he’s a real prophet?”

“His words will be taken down to form the new scriptures.”

“There are new scriptures?”  Somehow I tended to think of the bible as a moldy old book.  Finished.  I never thought of it as an evolving document.

“Oh yes, I have copies of most of them if you want to see them sometime.  Either of you,” Sam looked to Daphne.  Poor guy.  Bible study wasn’t the hottest lure to get a girl to come back with him to his apartment.  But Daphne actually looked interested.

“Yeah?  I’d like to check it out sometime, thanks,” she smiled sunnily.

“Is that where the prophecies about me and Azazael came from?  Were they new ones or were they made a long time ago?”

“It is difficult to say, I wasn’t aware of them until some time after I came to know you.  Adam is the one who brought them to my attention.”

“Everyone there sure seemed to know all about me and them.”  It was strange to be so famous for something that hadn’t happened yet.

“We’re not going to go shopping today, are we?”  Daphne asked out of the blue, checking her watch.

Grabbing her wrist, I turned the watch face towards me with a grimace.  “I’m sorry, Daph, we’ll go tomorrow, I promise.”

“Fine,” she grumbled.

“I would go shopping with you,” Sam volunteered, a look of cautious hope on his face that changed to radiant joy at Daphne’s happy smile.

“You would?  What do you need to buy?”

“Perhaps you might offer me some assistance.  I find myself needing a woman’s perspective.”

“I can totally do that.  You know, you should think about wearing something a little more tailored.  You’ve got the bod for it, why not show it?”

I listened to them go back and forth making plans, feeling like a third wheel.  Or is it a fifth wheel?  Because a third wheel is still a valuable asset for stability, right?  “Um, I can catch a bus back to town, I guess…” I ventured.  I needed to get back to get ready for work before too long.

“Okay, we’ll take you to the metro center, I think I saw one by the freeway exit,” she replied without skipping a beat.  Wow.  They were really ditching me?  Daphne had me going until I saw her break into a fiendish grin.  “Like I’m going to leave you at the bus stop to go shopping,” she laughed.  “Sam, do you mind if we give Mercy a ride back first?  Or we could always go shopping tomorrow.”

“Perhaps tomorrow is for the best?  I nearly forgot my duty to protect Mercy after nightfall.”  Sam was contrite as he recalled his promise to me, but I didn’t want to come between them.

“You know I probably don’t need a babysitter at night anymore.  Adam’s off chasing after Azazael, and now that I have my nifty sword, I can take care of myself in case Raum sends any more of his goons after me.  You can go with Daphne if you want to.  Of course, I’d appreciate the ride back first.”

“Are you sure?”  Daphne’s face puckered with worry.  “You can’t even make the sword appear.”

“I’m betting I can if a demon showed up though.  Remember how it popped up when Sam attacked me?  I’ll try it out with Nelo when I get home, but I think I’ll be safe enough.  You can always come and escort me home when I get off work if you’re worried about me.  Unless you guys think you’ll still be shopping at two a.m.?”  Daphne punched me in the arm at my tone, but I couldn’t help needling her a little bit after making me think I’d have to ride the bus home.

“No, we would not be shopping then,” Sam nodded, oblivious to my tease.  “That is agreeable to me if it suits your purpose, Daphne?”

“Yeah, that works for me.  Do you want to ride back with us in the car?”

I could see the struggle on Sam’s face as the dislike of cars warred with his desire to spend more time with Daphne and I took pity on him.  “It’s probably faster for him to get back his own way.  How about we meet up at my place and you guys can go from there?”  They were both in agreement and we went our separate ways.

“So… you and Sam.  When did that start up?”  I probed, the moment we were back on the road again.

“What do you mean?”

“Don’t play innocent with me, young lady,” I teased.  “You guys seem to be getting along pretty well.”

“Yeah, he’s a really nice guy.  I don’t mind the clueless puppy thing at all.  And in case you haven’t noticed, he’s not as clueless as you think he is.”

“Oh sure, after I wore him down for you.  He is coming along nicely though, isn’t he?”  I didn’t think he hid from sight nearly as much anymore either.  “So, Daphne, I know it’s not my business, but I’m gonna make it mine anyway.  You do get that he’s not allowed to be with a woman, right?”

“God, Mercy, it’s not like that!”

“No?  What is it like then?  ‘Cause I have to say, I’ve seen that calf-eyed look from you before.  Be honest.  Part of you is already trying to figure out what to name your children, am I right?”  Her telltale blush let me know I’d struck a chord and damn, I had to admit, their children would be gorgeous!  “Aw Daphne… I’m not saying you and Sam is terrible idea, but you should know there are some serious down sides to it.”

“I know that, don’t you think I know that?”  She darted a look at me before turning her eyes back to the road.  “I’m not dating the guy.  He’s just so… sweet and kind and adorable,” she gave a dramatic sigh.

“All good things,” I nodded.  “I don’t want to see you get hurt, that’s all.  You can’t forget what happened to Adam’s wife.  Those laws are still in place.  Even fallen angels aren’t supposed to take a human wife.”

“What if we just fooled around a little?” she teased, and I gave up trying to be the voice of reason.  Daphne was an adult, and she could make her own choices.  I have to say if it was me in her shoes, I might do the same thing.  Would I have been able to keep from falling for Adam if I was a regular human?  I already knew the answer to that one.

“Speaking of which, I met Raziel at the angel’s gathering.”

“Oh! He’s the one who killed Adam’s wife, right?”

Glad we were on the same page, I nodded.  “He wasn’t at all like I expected, by the way.  He was actually pretty nice.  He stood up for me against Nathanael, who was being a total dick again.”

“He was nice.  You mean you actually talked to him?”

“Yeah, for quite a while.  We decided to try and leave all the baggage from the past behind and start things with a clean slate.”  I was pretty proud of that, it felt like I was evolving past my tendency to hold a grudge.

“Mercy, you can’t be friends with him!”

“Why not?”  I knew my reasons but I wanted to hear hers.

“It’s… it’s un-American!”

“How is it un-American?”

Daphne struggled to come up with a good answer to that.  “I don’t know, but you can’t be friends with that guy.”

“You didn’t meet him, he’s a good guy,” I insisted.  “It’s not like he went on a killing rampage like some maniac, he was following orders.”

“So did the SS, that didn’t make them good guys.”

It wasn’t an argument I wanted to get into, and to be honest I was surprised my normally tender hearted friend took such a hard stance.  It was like we’d switched roles.  “It’s not as if we’re gonna hang out together all the time, I met him is all, and I agreed not to hate him on principle.”

“Wait until Adam finds out, he’ll hit the roof.”

“I wasn’t planning on telling him.”

“You know what they say about secrets and relationships.  Look at what happened to you and Ben?”

“Yeah, I know.  I can guarantee you though that there are things Adam keeps from me because he doesn’t want me to ‘worry my pretty little head about it’.”  That reminded me, I still hadn’t heard back from Ben and checking my phone, I didn’t have any missed calls.  How was I supposed to break up with the guy if he never answered his phone?

“That’s what I like about Sam.  He doesn’t even know how to lie,” she sighed dreamily and for the rest of the way home I listened while she gushed about his redeeming qualities.  I kept from voicing any more concerns over the pairing, but deep down I worried if I was going to have another reason to hate Raziel before too long.

Chapter Eighteen

It was strange living with a demon, even a minor imp like Nelo.  No matter how many times I asked him, he still called me Mistress (which I admit, I was starting to like), and he basically made himself a little home in my hall closet.  He made his peace with both Sam and Mimsy, bonding with the former over a Dukes of Hazzard marathon on TV, and the latter over a slab of smoked salmon.

Nelo took over most of the housecleaning duties since he was used to having to earn his keep and I have to admit, my bathroom had never been more sparkling clean or my laundry so April fresh.  About once a week I gave him a little burst of the Grace, and it was enough to keep him going without having to go out to feed off of people.  It didn’t cost me all that much energy-wise, and it made him so happy, it seemed like a fair trade to me.

One day I came home to find him with Mimsy nestled all cozy in his lap, a straight razor in his hand.  “Whoa, what the hell are you doing?” I demanded, my voice reaching an octave only animals could hear.  I was pretty sure we’d come to an understanding on how cats were friends, not food.

Nelo blinked up at me with total innocence.  “I was thinking, it must be terribly hard to think with all that hair, perhaps that’s why she doesn’t talk?”

God give me strength…  “Do not shave the cat.  Or me.   In fact, don’t do anything with hair ever, do you understand me?”

“As you wish, Mistress,” he nodded, clearly confused as to why I was so upset.

“Give it to me.” I held my hand out for the sharp razor, relaxing once I folded it safely away.  “Where did you even get a straight razor anyway?  No forget it, I don’t want to know.”  Ah the joys of diversity…

He was a great help to me in learning how to use the sword though.  Even though he was one of the good guys, my Grace reacted to him when he got too near, and I was able to call upon the sword.  Of course, every time the sword appeared it scared him to death, but I assured him over and over again that I’d never hurt him.

After some practice, I was fairly confident I could make it appear, with or without imminent threat, and I’d even started practicing with Sam on the wooden swords.  Satisfied I could defend myself from demons in the real world, and with Adam to protect me at night in the Ether, life finally settled down to where I wasn’t a ball of stress all the time.

Until one night Adam didn’t come when I called.

Or the next night.

Or the next.

I tried not to become that Ether version of a girl sitting at home waiting by the phone, but it was hard not to worry when he didn’t show after vowing to come whenever I called.  For days I moped around, basically living for the moment when I could slip back into the Ether and look for him again.

And still no word from Ben.  I wasn’t sure if it was because he already considered us broken up, or if he was dodging my calls because he wanted to keep us from officially breaking up.  In the end, I decided to leave the ball in his court.  He knew where I was, and I’d definitely tried to connect with him to get it all out in the open over and over again.

Thanksgiving was fast approaching and I made plans to have Matty, Daphne and Sam for dinner despite Sam’s misgivings over the holiday.  Keeping busy with those preparations, I told myself Adam could take care of himself and I hadn’t seen any sign of Azazael either, so whatever he was doing was working fine.  I could still feel him out there somewhere through our shared bond, so there was no cause for real panic.

I tried to focus on work, relieved there was one facet of my life that was completely back to normal.  And if I was a little moody or down… keeping busy gave me less time to dwell on Adam’s strange disappearance.  At least until the Ether turned more into a lonely prison than the sanctuary I’d envisioned.  Unable to escape to the release of real dreams, I think I started to get a little loopy during the day.  Hadn’t I read somewhere if you didn’t dream on a regular basis it could make you go mental?  Or was that just a dumb movie plot?  Whatever the reason, I started getting downright depressed, which is really unlike me.

Finally, I cornered Sam one night after work, begging him to take pity on me.

“I don’t know where he is.  I haven’t spoken to him since before you returned from Midian,” he answered solemnly.

“Is that true?  Do you really not know anything, or are you doing that thing where you’re keeping things from me because Adam asked you to?”  I studied his face carefully, not wanting to believe he could be completely ignorant of Adam’s whereabouts.

“I truly don’t know where he is.”

So where the hell was he?  A niggling of guilt surfaced as I thought of something.  “You didn’t say anything to him about me talking to Raziel, did you?”  Was Adam mad at me and off somewhere sulking?

“No, should I have?”

“No!  Definitely not,” I interjected quickly, that was the last thing I needed.

“Then you wish me to lie?”

“No, just don’t volunteer anything about it.  There’s no point in upsetting him.”  After all it wasn’t like I planned on spending a whole lot of time with Raziel anyway.

“I’m certain he’s fine. Adam is often fond of taking the bull by the horns as they say.  Wherever he is, you can be sure he has a plan.”

“Yeah, that’s exactly what I’m afraid of.”

* * *

In the Ether I played house, waiting for Adam to arrive.  Inserting myself into the familiar surroundings he’d taken me to before, his city apartment, I made myself at home while I waited.  Reading his books, watching his movies, cooking meals in his kitchen, at least - I think it was his kitchen.  I had no way of knowing if my imagination supplied what the rest of the apartment looked like or if I truly was in a place that represented how he lived.

I’d always been under the impression he had multiple places to live all over the world, money didn’t seem to be an issue for him and he liked to live well.  I liked it there, it was like being on vacation in a posh hotel, certainly nicer than my small apartment.  Though there was very little of him there, it did make me feel closer to Adam.  Plus, it was handy that I could produce anything I wanted out of thin air, it being the Ether.

You could have knocked me over with a feather when he strolled through the door.  “Honey, I’m home!” he called out cheerily, that familiar smirk on his face and a bouquet of red roses in his hands.

“Adam?”  Looking up from the couch, I flung away the blanket I’d been curled up with, racing for the door to hurl myself into his arms, roses be damned.  “Where have you been?” I demanded, kissing him before he had a chance to answer.  The roses forgotten, Adam wrapped his arms around me, hauling me up close to his body to kiss me enthusiastically.

“I had some business to attend to.”

“Business?  What kind of business?”

“Sadly, the kind that kept me away from you, my love.  Did you miss me?”

“You think?” I smirked, giving him a much more thorough kiss to convey my longing.  Adam didn’t skip a beat.  Lifting me into his arms, he carried me into the bedroom, never tearing his lips from mine.  When I felt the bed at my back, I scooted to get more comfortable, pulling back to smile up at him.  “I did miss you, where did you go?”

“We can talk about that later, there are more important things to tend to now.”  Adam buried his face in my neck, blazing a trail of kisses up towards my ear.

“No, really, where did you go?  You could have left me a note or a text message or something. I’ve been going out of my mind with worry.  Adam that tickles…”  It was difficult to concentrate when he did his level best to distract me, but he was acting a little weird and I wanted to know what was up.

“Don’t worry your adorable head about it, my love.  What does it matter now that we are together?”  Rolling above me, he swallowed my next question with a passionate kiss that stole my breath away.  As much as I enjoyed the attention, I couldn’t shake the feeling something wasn’t right.

“Hey, slow down, we have all night, right?” I pushed at his shoulder, gaining myself a breath.

“But I’ve missed you so, and I know you missed me.”  His hand slid up my thigh, questing higher and I shifted my hold from his shoulder to his hand.

“Seriously, what’s the rush?”

“I… don’t know how much time I’ll have here with you, and I want to make the most of it.  Is that so wrong?”  Renewing his attentions, he kissed along the curve of my jaw. “You are so delectable…”

Warning bells were going off like crazy, but I wasn’t quite sure why.  “Adam, what’s the safeword?” I asked, turning my lips away from his.

“You’re perfectly safe with me, Merceline, you know that.”  Undeterred, he kissed down the side of my throat towards the valley between my breasts even as I scooted out from under him.

“I’m dead serious, what’s the word, Adam?”

Adam rolled onto his hip to face me, annoyance written all over his features.  “What are you going on about now?”

“You’re not Adam, are you?”

“I’m whatever you want me to be, my love.”  Adam’s features rippled and then Azazael lay on the bed beside me.  I scrambled out of the bed like a shot, wanting as much distance between us as possible.  How could I be so stupid?  There were a ton of signals and I’d missed them, because I wanted it to be Adam coming back to me.

“When are you gonna get it through your head?  I’m not your love, I’m not your anything!”

“I think it is you who is mistaken, you and I share a bond, whether you like it or not,” he slid off the bed, stalking towards me slowly.  “The sooner you accept that, the happier you’ll be.”

“No, the sooner you accept that I’m not gonna roll over and spread my legs, the happier I’ll be,” I retorted, holding my ground.  “Adamiel!”  I called, in a last ditch effort to get him to come to me, hoping the urgency in my voice brought him from wherever he’d been hiding out lately.

“He can’t hear you, I made certain of that before I came.”

“What did you do to him?”  My eyes narrowed dangerously.  If he’d hurt Adam, or worse…

“I didn’t have to do anything to him.  He left voluntarily, completely of his own volition.”

“Where is he?”

“In a place where he won’t hear you call,” he shrugged, taking another step, but I was ready for him that time.  With a flick of the wrist my sword appeared, shining deadly sharp in my hand.  “You don’t truly want to stab yourself again, do you?  That can’t have been very comfortable.”

“It’s not for me this time, it’s for you.”  I was hoping, praying I was right, that my real physical sword could be called into the Ether the way Adam had drawn his sword the first time he’d stood against Azazael.  If not, then I was in a world of trouble.

“I thought we covered this before.  That won’t work against me here.”  With a negligent wave of the hand, he tried to dismiss the sword and his brows knit together in puzzlement when it didn’t disappear.  It was all I could do not to whoop for joy as that confusion turned to frustration when he tried again and the sword remained firmly in my hand.  “Interesting.”

“Yeah well, as long as you find internal bleeding interesting too, keep coming closer, by all means,” I taunted him, feeling much more confident with the blade in my hands despite my skill level in wielding it.  Azazael stood there for a long moment, maybe weighing the odds that I could seriously hurt him if he rushed me.  I assume he recognized the fact that he couldn’t disarm me or he would have tried it.  The real question was, could he summon his sword to the Ether as well, or had it been stripped from him when he was imprisoned?

“Well then, it seems we are at an impasse.”

“No, I’m pretty sure this is where you decide to try something else to get out of jail.”

“There is nothing else to free me,” his eyes blazed with fervor and I took a step backwards.

“Look, I’m sorry you’re bound or whatever.  But this isn’t so bad, right?  You can do anything you want in the Ether, that’s better than most prisoners have.”

“While my body suffers eternal torment?  No, thank you,” he muttered sourly, sitting on the edge of the bed, running his fingers through his hair.  I almost felt sorry for him, except for him being a violent psycho who attacked me the last time we met up.

“New prophecies are coming out every day, right?  Maybe you’ll find another loophole?  I’m not even convinced it would have worked through me anyway.  Besides, did you really want to go through childhood again?  The tweens suck, and being your own father has got to be a mindfuck.”

“You still don’t grasp it, do you?” he looked up, his blue eyes flashing.  “You are the key, I can feel it in my marrow.  I will never let you go.  Never.  I will chase after you until the end of days.”

“Yeah, okay, we’re done here.”  There I was trying to be nice and comforting and he went off threatening me again.  I don’t know why I even bothered trying to be nice to him in the first place.  “I tried reasoning and it got me nowhere, so let me try something you might understand.  Don’t come after me again.  I will not hesitate to cut you down where you stand, do you get me?”

“You can’t kill me here in the Ether,” he smiled.

“Maybe not, but it’ll still hurt like hell when I cut off your balls,” I bluffed, and I was gratified to see the color drain from his face.  “Now get the hell out of here before I feel like playing shish kabob.”

“I can see I’m going to have to be a lot more creative in the future.”  Azazael rose from the bed, a speculative gleam to his eyes.   “But make no mistake, we will meet again.”

“Bring it, I’ll be ready,” I replied with more confidence than I felt, breathing a sigh of relief when he disappeared.  Feeling like I’d dodged a bullet, I spent a worrisome night in the Ether, unable to relax for fear Azazael might come back.

When I woke up late the next morning I had a pounding headache.  You know, the kind where it feels like you spent the night before with your neck in a vice grip?  Sam was nowhere to be found, and I assumed he was out with Daphne somewhere.  Nelo tried to be helpful, fetching and carrying anything he thought could be of use.  But the little guy started to wear on my nerves, and after I got snappish with him, he retreated to the closet where he was more comfortable during the day anyway.    In the end, my natural healing ability softened the edges of the headache but it didn’t completely go away.

There was a small sense of relief in knowing I’d been able to repel another of Azazael’s attacks on my own and the sword had worked like a charm.  His threat to get more creative the next time he came after me was worrisome, but there was no point in borrowing trouble, I would have to deal with it when it came.  The question still hung heavy in my mind.  Where the hell was Adam?

Chapter Nineteen

I decided to go into work a little early, craving familiar surroundings where I’d be surrounded by people I knew and trusted.  Parker himself was behind the bar and Jilly chatted amiably with Chris the DJ up in the booth.  Not a whole lot was going on out on the floor but it was early yet for the after dinner crowd.

“Just because you came in early doesn’t mean you can leave early if you have a hot date planned for later,” Parker said as soon as he saw me, and I gave him a sour look.

“I don’t have a hot date later, I thought you could use the help around here.  I guess I thought wrong though,” I mentioned, looking around the empty club.  “Has it been this slow all night?”

“It’ll pick up,” he said defensively. “It always does after prime time is over.”

“I know,” I replied in a mollifying tone, taking a seat across the bar.  I didn’t feel right putting on an apron and clocking in when he didn’t need the help.  “How about a soda on the house for your oldest friend?” I gave him a winsome smile.

“I never said you were my oldest friend,” he smirked, filling a glass with diet soda.  “Of course, my oldest friend isn’t talking to me anymore.”

“Hm, I’m pretty sure that does qualify me as your oldest friend then.  It doesn’t count if you’re not friends anymore,” I pointed out, taking a sip of the drink, wishing for a jot of rum to spike it.

“Shit, maybe it’s time to bury the hatchet and make peace with her, huh?  Not that I think she’ll be up for it.”

“Your oldest friend is a woman, huh?  Why am I not surprised?”

“Hey, I can’t help it if most men are intimidated and women are naturally drawn to me,” he winked, and I couldn’t help but roll my eyes.

“So, why is this best friend not your friend anymore?”

“Oh, I fucked things up, as usual,” Parker shrugged.  “I made the age old mistake.”

“You slept with her?”  I raised a single brow expectantly.

“Of course I did, but that wasn’t what screwed things up.”

“What did then?  You didn’t want her the way she wanted you to?”

“In a manner of speaking,” he hedged.

“Meaning… what?  You didn’t love her?”

“No, I loved her alright, it just wasn’t…”

“They same way she loved you?” I suggested.

“Specific enough.”

“Oh.”  The picture came into focus then.  “You screwed it up literally, and she caught you in bed with someone else?”  It figured it would be something like that.  I liked Parker a lot, but dating material… he definitely wasn’t.

“She didn’t catch me in the act or anything, but yeah, other than that, you’ve pretty much summed it up.”  At catching my look, his hands came up in a supplicating gesture.  “Hey give me a break, I was younger then and stupid.  I like to think I’ve learned a thing or two about love since then.”

Thinking about his current love connection with Sharona, I wasn’t so sure.  But I didn’t want to talk about her and how great she was, so I didn’t bring her up.  Instead I lifted my drink to him in commiseration.  “Hey, we’ve all done things we regretted in the past, I’m not in a position to judge you for anything.”  Not with the messed up state my own life was in.

“Are you alright?” he asked suddenly, fixing me with a penetrating look.

“Yeah, I’m fine, why?”  I brushed aside the question, there wasn’t much I could go into with him anyway.

“You seem a little… I don’t know, down.  What are you doing in here so early for anyway?  How come you’re not out spending time with Ben?”

“Things with Ben still aren’t…”

“You guys broke up then?”  Something passed over his face that I didn’t recognize.

“It’s the inevitable conclusion.  I have to assume that since he hasn’t returned my calls in days it’s pretty much over, even though we never officially had ‘the talk’.  It’s for the best though, we were pretty incompatible in a lot of ways.”

“Who are you convincing, me or yourself?”

“What?” I snorted in disbelief.  “I didn’t think you even liked him.”

“I’m not saying I wanted to date him but I thought he made you happy,” he shrugged and I realized he was right about that to some extent.  Ben had made me happy, I just didn’t love him the way he deserved to be loved.

“He did, but it wasn’t…”  I debated how much I could say to him without opening a can of worms into more questions than I was comfortable with.  “Let’s just say, it’s not his fault and leave it at that.”

“No shit, you cheated on him?”  That caught his attention and a broad smile settled on his face.  “Well what do you know, you do have a bit of bad girl in you after all.”

I wasn’t sure what he was so happy about, and my brows drew together into a single dark line.  “Keep it down, it’s not exactly something I like to advertise.”

“Is it that guy who hangs out here all the time?  The weird one that stares at you the whole time?”

“Sam?  No,” I laughed, not even able to picture myself going to bed with him.  Okay, maybe I have thought about it once or twice before, but having to teach someone what to do from scratch wasn’t exactly my cup of tea, and there was another man who had stolen my heart.  “Sam’s more like a friend and occasional bodyguard.”

“Him?  He looks like he’s afraid of his own shadow.”

“You’d be surprised, I’ve seen him in action before and trust me, you don’t want to get on his bad side.”

“Yeah, okay,” Parker scoffed, pouring himself a beer.  One of the benefits of being the owner, he could drink on the job if he wanted to.  “Who is it then?  Your new main squeeze.  How come I’ve never seen him around?”

“Because he travels a lot,” not a lie, “and, he sorta rubs people the wrong way. I don’t think you’d like him.”  Now that I thought about it, I didn’t think the two would get along at all, and I resolved to keep that from coming up for as long as possible.

Parker frowned at that, taking a slow sip of his beer.  “I’m not sure I like the idea of you hooking up with a guy I haven’t gotten the chance to check out.  Maybe you should bring him around the club, let me get a look at him, run a credit check.”

He wasn’t serious, was he?  I could imagine them circling each other like Bantam roosters, staring each other down.  “I don’t think that’s such a hot idea.  Besides, we’re not… together, together just yet.  I wanted to sort things out with Ben first and then Adam had to leave again and… It’s just not a good idea right now.”  Or ever.

“Adam is his name?  Adam what?”

I stared back at him in utter dismay, realizing I had absolutely no idea what Adam’s last name was.  How could I have fallen in love with a guy and not know what his full name was? Oh sure I knew his true name, and whatever last name he was using was fabricated, but not to even know how to find him if he never came back… “It’s um…”

“You don’t know his last name?”

“No, of course I do, it’s… Why do you want to know?”  I deflected the question back to him.

“Hey, it’s okay, darlin’, God knows it’s not like I’ve never hooked up with a girl and never caught her name before.”

My cheeks flushed bright red, and again I looked around to make sure no one else listened in, but Jilly was still by the booth.  “It’s not like that!  He wasn’t a one night stand, so don’t compare me with your sordid past.”

“Still, you’re not lined up for the walk down the aisle any time soon then?”

“I… have no idea how to answer that.  We haven’t talked a whole lot about the future, it’s kinda new, you know?  I guess no, I’m not ready for the church wedding any time soon.”  Would we even have a church wedding?  Would such a union be sanctioned by God?  Would Adam want it to be?  There were a zillion questions that line of thought brought with it, and I saved it for a later date when I had enough time to turn them over in my head by myself.

“Good,” Parker lifted his glass to his lips and took a long drink.

“Why ‘good’?  Why shouldn’t I want to get married someday?  Hey, I might even ask you to walk me down the aisle, you being old enough to be my father and all,” I teased.  Parker was only old enough for that if he’d been a very precocious pre-teen.

“Yeah, count me out for that,” he gave me a pained look.

“Oh come on, I bet you’d look fantastic in a tux, and you’d have first crack at the bridesmaids,” I grinned, and his expression turned considering for a moment before it shuttered again.

“Not if you’re having a church wedding, but hit me up with it again if you decide to fly to Vegas, in which case I’m in.”

Again with his fear of churches.  “You know I always meant to ask you about that.  How come you dislike churches so much?”

“Who says I dislike churches?”

“You just did.  You said you weren’t interested if I got married in a church and before, that night we went for a walk you couldn’t get out of that church fast enough.  It was like you were afraid you’d turn to dust if you stayed in there longer than five minutes,” I laughed.

“It’s not churches entirely…” he hedged, draining the rest of his beer.  Parker poured himself another and refreshed my soda.  “It’s more a certain type of people inside them.”

“You don’t like religion?”

“I have nothing against it in principle.  Hey, if people take comfort from that stuff, more power to them.  It’s… I had a bad experience, that’s all.”

“What?  Did a priest tell you to mend your wicked ways or you were gonna burn in Hell?  I can practically guarantee that’s not gonna happen.”  I spoke out of instinct.  While Parker was a little self serving at times, I could tell by the quality of his soul he was a good person at heart, and that was what counted.  At least I think it was.  I was a little fuzzy on the actual rules for getting into Heaven.

“No, not a priest,” he took another deep drink and I thought that was all the answer I was gonna get.  But then he set his beer down, looking deep into the foamy depths as he opened up to me.  “I don’t think I ever told you much about my family, did I?”

“No, I… don’t think you’ve ever mentioned them before actually.”  Or maybe he had and I didn’t remember them.  “Were they very religious?”

“No, not really, not at first.  My dad died when I was little, and it was just my mom and me for a long time.”  A faint smile curved his lips when he mentioned his mother.  “She had the whole strict parent thing going sometimes, I had chores and a bedtime and it wasn’t like she let me eat candy for breakfast or anything, but we had fun together.  We were close.  She didn’t have a whole lot of friends after we moved, and we did everything together.  I know that’s probably hard for you to believe, me being a mama’s boy, but there it is.”   He gave a self deprecating smile.  Actually I could picture him being sweet to his mother, he had that tender side to him even though he liked to bury it.

“I sense a ‘but’ coming.”

“But, she met this guy, and he was a total holy roller or whatever you want to call it.  He was deeply, crazily religious and she bought into it hook, line and sinker.  It changed her, took over her whole life.  Saved her.  He convinced her I was filled with sin that had to be purged from my body to save my immortal soul.  All kinds of crap like that, you can imagine I’m sure.  And me being, well… me, I didn’t really toe the line with the new dictatorship.  Things were less than harmonious for a while, and then she married him and disowned me.”

“Your mom disowned you?” I gasped.  “How could she pick him over you?”  And I thought my relationships with my mom and dad were flawed… we looked like the Brady Bunch compared to his family.

“I’m glossing over a lot,” he waved my objection away.  “I was no angel to live with.  You know me, tell me I can’t do something and that just makes me itch to try it.  But I lit out of there when I was sixteen and didn’t look back.”

That explained a lot.  “So, you haven’t seen your family since you were sixteen years old?”

“Yeah, pretty much.  I stayed in touch with my aunt Nancy when my mom wouldn’t take my calls, but I didn’t go back for holidays or family reunions or any of that shit.”

“That must have been rough.”  Though in a way I’d done the same thing with my father, I had no idea where he was or even if he was still alive; though I imagined someone would let me know if he actually died at some point.

“Eh, it is what it is,” he shrugged.  “I tried to go and visit her when she got sick, tried to move her to a better facility… she wouldn’t even see me.  She didn’t want any of my ill gotten gains,” Parker smiled bitterly.

“What happened to her?”

“Bone cancer, it took her a few years ago.  You know those assholes actually barred me from the memorial service?  I visited her grave later but… to be honest, I didn’t feel anything.  Does that make me a fucking monster?  I don’t feel anything when my own mother dies?”

I could see he didn’t feel nothing about losing his mom.  In fact, he looked like it still troubled him deeply to have lost her years and years ago, not just when she died, and I reached out to cover his hand with my own.  “No, I don’t think you’re a monster.  I think you tried to deal with the hand you were dealt the best you could.  I’m sorry you lost her like that, but you know, not all religions are like that.”

Parker pulled his hand from mine with a roll of the eyes.  “Oh God, not you too?  Since when did you become a bible thumper?”

“I’m not, I’m just saying, you can’t throw the baby out with the bath water.  At the end of the day churches are made up out of people.  There are good and bad ones, if you don’t find one you like, it doesn’t mean you have to give up on religion entirely.”

“I don’t even know if God exists… and He for sure as hell hasn’t given a damn about me.”

“Oh He exists alright, you can trust me on that one,” I muttered.

“I never took you for the church going type.”

“I’m not really.  I haven’t been to one regularly in years and years.”  And I wasn’t likely to after what happened at the last one.  “But that doesn’t mean I don’t have faith.  That’s all I’m saying, don’t let the bullshit rules someone made up about their church keep you from having faith.”

“I have faith in the things I can count on, which are few and far between these days,” he replied with a wry twist of the lips.

“Fair enough,” I nodded.  Far be it from me to tell anyone what they should or shouldn’t believe.  “And that officially ends the sermonizing for the night,” I smiled, changing the subject.  “Do you want me to come back there and give you a break?”  He looked like he could use a moment to get his head back in the game.  Not that I didn’t like this Parker who opened up to me, but I knew it made him uncomfortable to be seen as human in front of others and it would start to get busy soon.

“Yeah, alright.  I’ll be in my office if anyone needs me.”  Parker tossed me his apron and I handed over my purse for him to put in the office as I took his place behind the bar.  Of course, it was still slow as molasses, and besides trading a few pleasantries with Jilly there wasn’t much to do, so I busied myself taking a quick inventory of stock.  Parker emerged about a half hour later, looking more like his old self.

“Hey, what are you doing for Thanksgiving?  Did you make plans with Sharona?”  I called out, surprised when he hesitated a fraction before answering.

“Ah right, yeah… that’s over.”

Shit.  And there I was trying to bring things to a lighter mood.  “What?  When did that happen?”  The last I remembered hearing they were going strong and he was ridiculously happy with her in a deluded sort of way.

“A few days ago,” he shrugged like it was no big deal, but I knew better.  She’d managed to worm her way underneath his armor and he was hastily trying to cobble it back together again.

“I had no idea Parker, I’m so sorry.”

“Yeah well, I wasn’t exactly advertising it.”

“What happened?  I thought you said she was the one.”

“Eh, you called it.  She was a gold digging bitch, straight up,” he shrugged and I decided not to push for more details.  “So, let me know when I can expect to take a crack at those bridesmaids,” he gave me a lopsided grin, rapping on the bar before he went to give the DJ a break in the booth.  Business picked up and I didn’t have much time to dwell on relationships or family, or much of anything except for keeping up.  After spelling Chris, Parker came back to help me behind the bar until the worst of the rush was over and he disappeared back into his office again.

Jilly came behind the bar when it slowed down to give me a break, and I stepped outside to sit in the alley for a few minutes.  I know I wasn’t supposed to go back out there by myself after nearly being killed in the same alley, but honestly, I wasn’t afraid of the local crime element anymore.  Besides, it was deserted out there, and the cold air felt good after being so overheated inside.

When the back door opened again, I braced myself for the lecture I knew was coming, no matter who it opened it.  Parker, Jilly, Walter; I expected to get scolded like a little girl by any of them.  Instead I looked up, surprised as hell to see Ben standing there.

“You shouldn’t be out here by yourself, you know,” he said, predictably.

“What are you doing here?”  I probably could have been a little more polite, but my astonishment overwhelmed my normal thought process.  Days of no contact and he picked then to show up?

“Parker called me.”

“Parker called you.”  Were they bosom buddies now?

A flush of color stole up the side of his neck.  “Yeah, he said you could use the rest of the night off and that I should give you a break and we should talk.  Only he used a little more profanity.”

“I’ll bet.”  I wasn’t sure how I felt about it, what was Parker trying to accomplish exactly?  Still, I was grateful for the chance to finally connect with Ben and clear the air.  Only… what kind of expectation had Parker set with him?  Did he tell Ben I was pining over him?  What had he said to motivate Ben to break the silence and come to see me?  “So, um… yeah.”  Now that I had him there, I had no idea what to say to him.  I didn’t want to blurt out I was seeing Adam, and I had no idea where things actually stood between us.

“You know, I’m glad he called because I’ve been meaning to talk to you, things have been crazy at work and…”

“For me too, it’s been a weird month so far,” I nodded.

“Actually, that’s a lie.  Work was busy, but that isn’t why I was avoiding you.”

“It’s not?”  Here it came…

But instead of following up with the reason, he looked around the alley uncomfortably.  “Maybe we can go somewhere more private and talk?  Can I give you a ride home?”

We were completely alone, but I could see where he was coming from.  “Well, I still have half a shift left.”

“I don’t think that’s a problem. Parker more or less indicated it was more important to get this sorted out between us.  But if you’d rather do it some other time…”

“No, I think we should definitely have that talk tonight, but hold on a sec.  Let me go talk to Parker, make sure it’s okay with him.”  I had a few words of my own for my boss.

“Sure, I’ll be inside by the door.”  Ben held the door open for me to go in first, not wanting to leave me alone in the alley, and I gave him a tentative smile as I passed by on the way to Parker’s office.  Without bothering to knock, I burst into his office and he looked up, not at all surprised to see me.

“Parker… What the hell, why did you call Ben to come down here?  I told you I was basically broken up with him,” I demanded, but he looked unperturbed by my outburst.

“Because regardless of whatever fight you’re having right now, the two of you were good together and I could see he made you happy.”

He could have knocked me over with a feather, that was the last thing I’d expected him to say.  “I told you, I’m into someone else.”

“Someone who isn’t here for you.  You don’t need that, you need a guy who’s crazy about you.  You need a guy who’s dependable and isn’t going to break your heart.”

“Ben can’t break my heart because I never fully gave it to him.  Parker… Look, I appreciate what you’re trying to do here, but you’re way off base about Ben and me.”

“I know, I stuck my nose in, but I figured worst case scenario, you two can clear the air between you and move on.  I could see how much it bummed you out not to have that closure.”

Closure?  “Since when did you get to be so intuitive?  I could have sworn the only thing you were paying attention to was my cleavage,” I teased.

“Well, that goes without saying,” he gave me a wolfish grin, “but I pay attention.”

“And it’s really okay if I go home early?  You said before…”

“I know what I said, but it’s slow enough that Jilly can handle the bar for a while and I’ll be back out there soon.  You go ahead and get your shit together and be back in bright and early tomorrow ready to work.”

I waited for some other sarcastic remark to come out of him, but he looked to be in earnest.  Coming around the desk, I bent down to wrap my arms around his neck.  “I don’t care what anyone says about you, Parker.  You’re not a heartless bastard at all,” I laughed, hugging him tight.  After a moment’s hesitation, I felt him hug me back.

“Don’t spread it around, I’ll deny it.”

“Don’t worry, your secret is safe with me, boss.”  I dropped a quick kiss on his cheek as I pulled away, untying my apron and tossing it into the hamper.  “Wish me luck.”

“You won’t need it, kiddo.  Now get out of here, I’ve got work to do.”

“Yes, sir.” I gave him a mock salute, grabbing my purse on the way out.  After a quick word to Jilly, I found Ben waiting by the entrance.  I was half convinced he’d lose his nerve and take off by the time I got back to him.

“All set?” he smiled.

“Yeah, let’s go.”

Chapter Twenty

The car ride home was awkward, I’m not gonna lie.  Neither one of us said much, listening to the radio until we got there and I led the way up to my apartment.  “Hold on a sec, I want to make sure we have some privacy.”  I stopped him at the front door.

“Oh, Sam is still staying here, right?”

“Yeah, right,” I nodded with a tight smile.  I didn’t think he was ready to see Nelo again quite so soon.  “I’ll be right back, don’t go anywhere.”  Ducking inside, I switched on the lights in the darkened apartment.  “Nelo?”

“Yes, Mistress?”  His voice came from the bathroom.

“Hey, I have company so try and make yourself scarce,” I whispered through the closed door.

“You wish me to hide?”

“Not hide exactly.  It’s Ben though, and you know how he gets.”

“Oh.”  There was silence for a moment.  “I understand.  I will keep to the shadows.”

“Great, thanks.  Have you seen Sam around?”

“He is with Miss Daphne at the season’s most hilarious comedy and best feel good movie of the year.  They will laugh and cry,” Nelo reported, and I could imagine Sam going on about it.  I was pretty sure what movie they were at, and I wondered if things between them had graduated into an official date, or if it was still a ‘friends’ thing.  Either way, the coast was clear.  Idly I wondered what Nelo was doing in the bathroom, but decided I was better off not knowing.  Mimsy was safe, asleep on the end of my bed, so whatever it was, he couldn’t be getting into too much trouble.  Could he?

Returning to Ben in the hallway, I opened the door and invited him in.  “We should have plenty of privacy here, Sam’s out with Daphne tonight.”

His brows came up in surprise over that.  “Oh, I didn’t realize they were a couple.”

“Well, they’re taking things slow.” I flipped my hand back and forth.  “Come on in and have a seat.  Can I get you something to drink?  Some coffee?”

“No, thanks.  Mercy…” Ben took my hands when I would have turned away to put the pot on for myself and I guess I couldn’t blame him.  I tended to try and fill the space by focusing on busywork, and we did need to talk.  “I want to start off by apologizing.”

“You’re apologizing to me?” I blinked, not expecting him to say that at all.

“Yes, I am.  I was way out of line the last time I was here.  Here you were, all upset and alone after going through some pretty horrific things, and all I did was jump down your throat.  Do you think you can ever forgive me?”

“I…”  It didn’t happen to me very often, but I was at a complete loss for words.  Usually something smart alecky came to mind, but I had nothing.

“It’s okay if you need some time, but I wanted you to know I’m here for you if you’ll still have me, and I’m sorry I screwed things up.”

“Ben…”  Christ, could I feel any guiltier?  He was being so nice, how could I break it to him that I’d essentially already moved on?  “It wasn’t all your fault,” I finally added lamely.  “I could have been more open with you from the start.  In fact, there are more things you should know.  Things I should have been honest about with you for a long time.”

“Whatever it is, it doesn’t matter.”  He gave my hands a squeeze.  “I’ve missed you so much these past few days, and to be honest, I was looking for a way to work up the courage to come and beg you to take me back before Parker called.”

Oh no…  “Ben, we should sit down for a minute and…”

“I should have told you this a long time ago…”

“…there are things you don’t know about my time in Midian and…”

“I love you.”

Oh God…

“I was afraid if I said it I’d scare you away, but I’ve got nothing to lose now, right?” he gave me a lopsided smile and I felt so horribly guilty, it was paralyzing.

“Ben…I don’t know what to say.”

“Say you love me too and we’ll put all this where it belongs, in the past.”

How did I respond to that and not absolutely crush his spirit?  “Ben, come and sit down with me.”  I needed a few seconds to regroup as I led him to the sofa.  “I think… I think we need to take a step back here for a moment and acknowledge we have some real problems.  We can’t slap a band aid on them and hope they go away.”

“I remember the very first time I saw you, lying in the hospital bed and I thought… you were so beautiful.  Even amid all that sickness and death you shone like a star in the darkness, and I knew I had to get to know you.”

My brows drew together at the segue.  “Okay, that was… random.  I’m not saying we didn’t have something real, we did, but something happened along the way.  We grew farther and farther apart, and I’m not convinced we ever really belonged together to start with.”

“How can you say that?” he frowned, picking up my hand again.  “We had some great times together.  The best times in my life were spent with you.  What about the time we went to the park together and fed the ducks?  You love ducks.”

What was with the walk down memory lane?  I love ducks?  He wasn’t getting it.  To stick with the band-aid analogy, I was gonna have to rip it off.  “I am in love with someone else.”

“Adam,” he said succinctly.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to.  In fact, it was the last thing I wanted to happen, but he kinda snuck up on me.”

“Adam will drop you the first time someone else dangles a piece of ass in front of him.”

“Hey!  You don’t know him at all, he loves me too, he told me so.”

“And you believed him?”  His tone was pitying, and it grated on my nerves.

“Why shouldn’t I believe him?”

“You’re going to take the word of an angel who was kicked out of heaven for breaking faith with God, and who has spent the past few millennia debauching himself with anything that moves?”

That seemed a little harsh, but I couldn’t blame him for being upset.  I wished I hadn’t had to blurt it out like that, but he’d forced my hand.  “I know he’s not perfect, and I’m not saying he doesn’t have his faults, but I know he loves me.”  My faith in that was unshakable.

“Where is he then?  Or is he hiding in the bedroom?  Is that who you were talking to when we first got here?  Keep the new boyfriend tucked away while the old boyfriend comes to call?”

“No, he’s not here, I was making sure we’d have some privacy.”

“Oh, then I applaud your discretion.  Were you planning on giving me a pity fuck before you cut me loose?”

“Excuse me?”  I thought I must have misheard him, there was no way Ben would talk to me that way.

“What, no last go for old time’s sake?  Come now, Mercy, I think you owe me that much, don’t you?”

“I think you should go home now.”  I rose to my feet, but he caught hold of my arm and yanked me back down to the couch again and my heart fell into the pit of my stomach.

“I don’t think so, I’m not done with you yet.”

“Ben, I know you’re upset…”

Strangely enough that made him smile.  “Am I?  Do I appear upset?  How good of you to notice.”  I was still reeling from the rapid shift of emotions when he backhanded me across the cheek.  I’m not talking a little love tap either, I mean the fucker hit me hard enough to make my head rock back against the arm of the couch and I lay there, too stunned to move.  Never in a million years would I have imagined Ben hitting a woman, especially one he claimed to love.  And that’s when it hit me with more force than the blow to the head.

It wasn’t Ben.

“You screwed up.  Ben would never hit me like that,” I managed to get out, my hand going to my cheek, which throbbed something fierce.

“No?  I can’t imagine why not,” Azazael smiled out of Ben’s eyes.  “What a little tease you are, inviting the man back to your apartment to break his heart.  Why didn’t you do it at the club if you weren’t going to give him one last thrust?”

“Not that I expect you to understand, but I was trying to spare his feelings.”

“How sweet.  Lucky for me you decided to secure the privacy I need to get what I want.”  Ben grabbed a handful of my hair, dragging me closer, and a whimper of pain escaped my lips despite my best efforts to keep my fear from showing.  Unfortunately it shone from every pore as the Grace made my skin start to glow.

“You can’t force me.  It has to be freely given.  That’s what the prophecy stipulated, remember?”

“I’m willing to do a little experimenting.  You’re the one being difficult.  I could have made this beautiful, special.  You’re the one that’s making me hurt you.”  His free hand came up to stroke the cheek he’d hit tenderly and I shrank away from his touch, making me wince as his fingers tightened painfully in my hair.

“I’m warning you.  Let me go.”  I didn’t want to hurt him, not while he was in Ben’s body, but I wasn’t going to let him attack me either.

“Let’s see if we can’t put that pretty mouth of yours to better use, shall we?”  He smashed his lips against mine in an obscene mockery of a kiss, and I blasted him good with my Grace while I scrambled out from under him.  But instead of going down, he merely absorbed the blow, and with a roll of the shoulders he came right for me again, shoving the couch negligently aside with one hand.

“You’ll have to do better than that while I’m in this body.  That was barely more than foreplay.”

So much for my preferred weapon against humans.  That left me one other option besides screaming bloody murder and having the neighbors call the cops.  I called the sword to my hand, gratified to feel its comforting weight in my grasp.  That gave him pause, and he halted his advance, watching me warily.

“So, your little toy works here as well, does it?”

“And I’m guessing yours doesn’t.  Definitely not in Ben’s body, am I right?”  I could tell by the look on his face that I was, but he wasn’t disturbed enough by it to back off.  Instead he circled around, watching me carefully.  “Leave now, and don’t ever come back.”  I circled too, leaving him a clear shot at the door.

“I haven’t gotten what I came for,” he protested, the smile returning to his lips as he started in closer again, moving slowly.

“Don’t be stupid, I know how to use this,” not a lie.  Okay, technically it wasn’t a lie, only my skills were rudimentary at best.  He didn’t seem to be too worried about it as he continued his slow advance, but I held my ground.  “Don’t make me do this…”

“You wouldn’t want to hurt sweet, dependable, old Ben, now would you?”  His hands came up in a supplicating gesture, but still he advanced.  I flashed out with the tip of the sword, nicking him in the side.  “Ow, that hurt, you bitch!”  He seemed more surprised than anything else.

“I told you to back off.”

“I’m through playing games.  Sword or no sword, I will have you on your back.”  He stepped forward again and I was forced to respond, managing to hit his shoulder that time instead of his heart as I’d been training to do.  It was both easier and harder than I thought it would be to run a man through, especially one I cared about.  That time the sword cut through flesh and bone alike to reappear behind him.  Ben froze on the end of my sword, his eyes wide with pain before he staggered backwards and I pulled it free.

“Please, just go…” I begged him, worried about the rapidly spreading stain on his shirt.  If Ben died because of me, I didn’t think I would be able to live with myself.

“Alright, you’ve made your point,” he laughed with a raspy cough and I eased my stance a little, until I saw him come up with the gun in his hand.  “I believe a gun trumps the sword.  Marvelous little weapons, these.  So easy to use.  Even without the detective’s skills, I’m fairly certain I could cause you all manner of damage from this distance.”

“You won’t shoot me, you need me, remember?”  I put all the bravado I could muster into those words.

“I need parts of you, not all of you.  It would serve my purpose perfectly well if you ended up a feeble minded idiot in the hospital.  They might even give you into my care, me being the doting boyfriend and all.”

His words painted a frightening picture and I backed away until I came up against the kitchen, the corner of the breakfast bar digging painfully into my side.  “If you shoot that thing, people will come.”

“No one is coming for you, Merceline.  Now yield to me, or find out how far I’m willing to go.”

“I wouldn’t say no one,” Adam drawled, looking cool and collected as he leaned against the wall.  “Sorry I’m late, babydoll.  Traffic was a bitch.”

“Adam!”  A wave of relief swept through me so strongly, I thought I might pass out.  Did he not see the gun, or did he not care?

Adam looked between the two of us, noting the growing bloodstain on Ben’s shirt.  “I’m guessing the talk didn’t go so well, huh?”

“That’s not Ben, it’s Azazael,” I retorted, hoping to God that made some kind of a distinction to him.

“Even better.  I get to kill two birds with one stone.” Adam’s grin turned positively bloodthirsty.  A flicker of worry crossed Ben’s features at the interruption before he regained his easy smile.

“Very fortuitous timing, Brother.  But before you start gauging the strength and speed you’ll need to overpower me, know this - I will shoot her with this contraption before you silence this body.  If I have to remain in torment for all eternity, so shall you.”

“That’s assuming you live long enough to pull the trigger,” Adam growled.

“Even in this human shell, I doubt you could get here fast enough to stop me.  Even in death the muscles would contract, carrying out my last orders.”

“How about nobody kills anybody?” I interjected.  “Azazael, you can’t win this round.  Why don’t you let Ben go and we’ll forget this happened?”  It wasn’t that I was worried about getting shot.  Not with Adam there.  I knew he’d do whatever it took to keep me from getting hurt.  But I was pretty sure even he wasn’t strong enough to survive getting shot in the head or the heart.

“I will not simply let this go,” Ben replied, his eyes a little wild.

“Works for me,” Adam shrugged.  In the space of a heartbeat, he rushed Ben and the two crashed to the ground.  The sound of gunfire muffled by bodies went off once, twice… three shots, and I stood in a shocked stupor, expecting one or both of them to get up and keep at it.

But neither of them moved.

I couldn’t breathe.

I couldn’t think.

The pounding of my heart sounded loud in the resulting silence as I stared at the pair of them gone still on the floor.  And then there was the faintest of groans, too low to distinguish which one of them made it.  Tears pricked at my eyes as I ran to Adam’s side, pulling him off of Ben, a rush of relief flooding me when he groaned in pain at the movement.  Twin spots of blood emerged on his chest, on either side of his heart, spreading faster than I liked.  Grabbing the bottom of his shirt, I pressed it against the wounds to get the bleeding to stop, because I couldn’t think of anything else to do.

Adam’s face contorted with pain, but the corner of his mouth still twitched up in a semblance of his usual smirk.  “What are you trying to do, kill me?”

“I’m trying to save you, you moron.”

“Then heal me, genius.  Don’t just lean on my wounds.”

“Oh, right!”  Feeling like an idiot, I took a few precious seconds to center myself, because I wouldn’t do either of us any good if I was too scattered to focus the Grace.  Satisfied I was as grounded as I was going to get, I pushed the healing power out of my hands and into his chest, blocking out everything else.  I’d never tried healing anything so difficult before, and for the first time, I felt some resistance, as if the wound was so grave, it didn’t want to be healed.  Dimly, I was aware of his breathing becoming more labored, and grunts of pain as I pushed through the barrier and felt the healing Grace start to knit his wounds together.  It felt like it went on and on, but when at last I opened my eyes, the skin was smooth and unblemished, the crust of drying blood the only indication he’d been hurt at all.

My vision swam as a wave of dizziness hit me with enough force to knock me onto my back.  “Mercy?”  I heard Adam calling to me, but it sounded far away.  Through the fog I tried to puzzle out why I was so affected.  I’d grounded like I was supposed to, why did I feel like I was nailed to the floor?

“Here,” I replied, turning my head weakly to find Adam bent over Ben’s body.  “Is Ben okay?”  With a pang I realized I hadn’t once thought about healing Ben first, Adam’s safety had completely consumed my thoughts.

“He’ll live.”

Adam blocked most of my view of Ben, busy doing something I couldn’t quite manage to figure out.  “What are you doing?  Does he need healing?”  After he sat back on his heels, I could see he’d bound Ben’s arms behind his back with thick ropes.  He looked incredibly uncomfortable, even in his unconscious state.  “Is that really necessary?”  I tried pushing myself up to a sitting position, but thought better of it as a new wave of dizziness hit me.

“This… is the only thing keeping Azazael in there when he wakes up,” Adam replied smugly, nudging him with his boot before he came back to me.  “Are you okay?”

“I’m… kinda woozy, but I think I’m fine.  That took a lot out of me.  What about you?  Did I get it all?  You’re not still bleeding on the inside are you?”

“No, I’m peachy keen, jellybean,” he grinned cheerily.  “You did a bang up job there. I think you might have a real gift for healing.  I’ve never seen anyone push these babies out that fast before.”  Adam opened my hand and laid two lead slugs in the palm, the bullets that had been in his chest minutes before.

I stared down at the little lumps, so small, but capable of so much damage.  What a weird souvenir to end up with.  “Where’s the third one?  I heard three shots.”

“Oh, that one’s still in old Ben’s belly.”

I sat up, despite the dizziness to stare down at Ben in alarm.  “What?  You left the bullet in there?  We have to get it out!”

“It’ll keep for now.”

“What do you mean it’ll keep for now, he’ll die if we leave it in there.”

“I need him docile for transport, but don’t worry, I won’t let him die.  If he dies, we have to start this all over again.”

“Huh?”  I had the makings of a headache, but I was starting to feel a little stronger at least.

“Am I going too fast for you, kitten?”  He brushed the hair away from my face and tucked it behind my ear which was partially infuriating and partially soothing.  And if that makes any sense to you, I wish like hell you’d explain it to me…

Catching his hand and pulling it down into my lap, I silently willed him to make sense.  “Please tell me what’s going on, where are you transporting him?”

“I made a deal to keep him out of our hair for good, and I’d rather he didn’t try to take my head off along the way.  So, the weaker he is, the better for now.  Trust me, if he starts to slip away, I’ll hit him with a dose of Grace and he’ll be fine.”

“Out of our hair, where?”

“In Midian.”

“In Midian,” I repeated, sure I must have misheard him.  “You made a deal with Raum to take him to Midian?  For what?”

“Raum agreed to keep him on ice for us.  No more Azazael, no more Ben, no more problem,” his smile was beatific.

“You went to see Raum?  Is that where you were this whole time?”

“Well no, I had to go upstairs to steal the ropes first.  Sorry, I kinda forgot about the time difference.”

“Why didn’t you tell me where you were going?  I was worried sick!”

Adam stroked his thumb over the back of my hand soothingly.  “I’m sorry, Mercy.  I didn’t want anyone else to know what I was up to in case Azazael figured it out, and worked out a way to counter it.”

I accepted that with a nod, taking a moment to digest everything before coming up with my next set of questions.  “What’s to keep Azazael from jumping out of Ben’s body the moment he wakes up?”

“The ropes have been specially blessed, he won’t be pulling a Houdini on us as long as we keep him tied up.”

He sounded so reasonable, I was at a loss as to why the morality of the situation completely eluded him.  “You can’t keep him trapped in Ben’s body.”

“The hell I can’t, do you know what a rare opportunity this is?  I was just getting back from making the deal and I was gonna have to lie in wait until he tried something like this.  This is a phenomenally lucky break.”

“But what about Ben?  He doesn’t deserve this.  He didn’t do anything wrong, why should he have to spend eternity in Midian?”

“That’s the way the cookie crumbles, baby.  Maybe it’s karma…”

“It is not!”  I started to lose it as things spun out of control.  “I can’t let you do this.”

“It’s already done.”

“I won’t let you keep Ben locked up forever because of me.”

“It’s not forever, it’s just until he dies.  But under the right conditions, I think we’ve got at least a fifty year window to work with and come up with something else.”  Letting go of my hand, he started to peel off his sticky shirt.  “Damn, this shirt cost me a hundred and fifty bucks.”

“This isn’t funny.”

Adam looked up, losing his glib tone, his eyes deadly serious.  “No, it’s not.  But it’s the only thing I could think of to keep you safe.  This way Azazael is trapped in Midian.  He can’t hurt you here, he can’t hurt you in the Ether, and no demons will be coming after you either.  Now I wish I could say I was sorry about this happening to good old Ben, but I’m not.  As far as I can see this is a win/win scenario.”  With that he got up, tossing the shirt in the garbage can and grabbing a handful of paper towels to clean up the mess on his chest.

There were so many things wrong with that statement I wasn’t sure where to start.  But one detail caught my attention.  “Why are no demons more coming after me?”

“What?”

“I understand why Azazael will be trapped, but what does that have to do with demons coming after me?”

“Because of the deal I made with Raum.”

The hairs on the back of my neck stood up and I knew, I knew there was even more to it that I wasn’t going to like at all.  “What did you do?”  My voice was barely above a whisper.

“I made a deal for your safety, that’s all.”  Adam tossed the sodden mess away and reached for the dishtowel to dry off.

“What did you do!” I demanded, pushing myself to my feet, swaying only slightly as I refused to let him brush it aside.

“Hey, sit down before you fall down and hurt yourself.”  Adam wrapped an arm around my waist, but I refused to let go of him when he would have deposited me on the couch, pulling him down to sit beside me.

“Please Adam, tell me whatever it is you think I can’t handle, I’m stronger than I look.”  I didn’t necessarily feel that way inside, but I couldn’t stand waiting for the other shoe to drop any longer.  Adam sighed, and I felt my stomach clench.  It wasn’t my imagination, there was something else he didn’t want to tell me.

“I made a deal with Raum to keep you safe.”

“What kind of a deal.”

“I agreed to pinch hit in exchange for his promise to leave you alone.”

“Which means what exactly?”

“I agreed to stay in Midian for a while in your place.”

“You did what?”

“It’s not for that long, and he agreed no one under his command is to touch you ever again.  It seemed like a good deal at the time.”

“Are you totally deranged?  You volunteered to let Raum feed off of you?  For how long?”

“For a year and a day.”

My eyes closed, as if I could block out the meaning of those words that damned us to a year apart.  It was a long minute before I trusted myself to speak again without screeching like a fishwife.  “And you intend to go through with this?  Or are you planning on escaping once you drop off Ben?”

Adam managed to look offended at that.  “No matter what you’ve heard, I keep my word once it’s given.  I intend to hold up my end of the deal, it’s the only way I can make sure he holds up his.”

“Do you seriously think you can trust him to?”

“Yes, I’ve had dealings with him before.  He’s bound by his word, the same as I am.”

“Honor among the damned…” I murmured, feeling like I was drowning.  “What am I supposed to do, sit here and go on with my life while I know both you and Ben are going through unspeakable torment?”

“Pretty much, yeah.”  Adam nodded and I caught his hand, panic welling within me as he rose to his feet.

“Don’t do this, Adam.  Please.  We’ll find another way.  Don’t leave me like this.”

“It’s just for a year, it’ll be over before you know it.”

“How can you say that?  Don’t you even care that we’ll be apart?”  My spirit fell in the face of his indifference and he framed my face with his hands, thumbs brushing against my cheeks.

“Of course I care, how can you even ask me that?  Being apart from you has been killing me for these past months, and this will be… worse,” his throat worked as he swallowed.  “But if this is what it takes to keep you safe, then this is what I’m gonna do.  That’s all there is to it.”

“And I don’t get any say in the matter?”  I turned my face into his touch, pressing a kiss to the palm of his hand.

“You’ll be fine.”  Adam leaned down to press a soft kiss to my forehead.  “You’re right you know, you’re stronger than you look.”

“Adam please…”  The rest of my plea was cut off by the crush of his lips against mine as he branded me with a searing kiss, as though he was afraid I might forget him in the coming year.  I clung to him, determined to change his mind the only way I knew how, but it wasn’t enough.

Finally, he pulled back.  Holding me tight, he whispered into my hair.  “I will always love you, Mercy.”

“I love you too, Adam, even if I feel like breaking your legs right now to keep you here.”

His warm chuckle rumbled through my body before he released me and I instantly felt the loss of his touch down to my soul.  “Good.  Try not to forget that.  If I come back in a year and there’s somebody else in your bed, there’ll be hell to pay.”  His voice was light as he tugged a coat on over his bare chest.

“Oh, I dunno, if another fallen angel stumbles into my bed I might keep him around for a while.  How else am I gonna keep myself out of trouble?” I teased back.  It was either that or cry, and I didn’t want our last moments together to be weepy and sad.

“I’m pretty sure that’d be the opposite of keeping out of trouble,” he gave me a sour look as he hauled Ben up to his feet, tossing him over his shoulder with ease.

“What can I say, I’m a trouble magnet,” I shrugged, trying not to wince when I saw Ben’s face contort with pain before he slipped back into oblivion.

“Good thing I like trouble,” Adam grinned, pausing by the door for one last look, he turned to go.

“Be careful,” I called out, chasing him to the door but by the time I got there he was gone.  “Yeah, as careful as you can be turning yourself in to a demon lord to be fed on for a year,” I murmured to myself in the empty hallway.  With leaden feet I returned to the living room which was a complete mess.  The couch was still shoved out of its normal spot and Adam and Ben’s blood mingled on the floor next to Ben’s discarded gun.

Mechanically I pulled the couch back into place and picked up what was left of the roll of paper towels to clean up the mess, but my legs gave out before I could get up the nerve to swab up Adam’s blood.  Instead I sank down onto the floor and wept, feeling utterly and completely alone.  Even Nelo’s gentle touch at my shoulder didn’t pull me from the chasm of despair I found myself at the bottom of.  I was vaguely aware of him moving around the apartment, the sting of disinfectant hitting my nose as he cleaned up the signs of the struggle and then silence as he left me to grieve in peace.

At the sound of sirens in the distance, I realized I had to pull it together.  While no one had come running at the muffled sound of the shots fired, a neighbor might have called the police.  Drying my eyes, I was surprised to feel a sting of pain in my hand and looked down to find the two bullets I’d pulled out of Adam’s chest tightly clenched in my hand, hard enough to leave little welts in the skin.  Sticking them in my pocket, I picked up the gun and debated what to do with it.

If the police searched the apartment there weren’t many options for keeping it out of sight.  The toilet tank trick was sure to be the first place they looked and under the mattress was out of the question.  In the end I gave it to Nelo, asking him to keep it in the shadows until I asked for it again.  Nelo agreed without comment, his eyes wide and solemn.

It turned out I’d been worried for nothing.   The police never even knocked on my door.  The cruiser was parked outside for less than ten minutes before it left.  It was a good thing I wasn’t lying on the middle of my living room floor bleeding to death; I’d have been a goner for sure.

I crawled into my cold bed in my work clothes, too bone weary to undress, but sleep didn’t come.  Some time later I heard Daphne and Sam come back from the movies, their voices full of animated energy until they realized my bedroom door was shut and I must be home.  Briefly I thought of going out to tell them all about what had happened, but it was all too raw.  If I started crying again I didn’t think I’d ever stop.

When the morning sun turned the dark gray shadows on the walls to a lighter gray, I took a long, hot shower, letting the sorrow that hung heavy over my heart run down the drain with all the worries and fears for the things I couldn’t change.

Adam was gone.

But that didn’t mean I couldn’t steal him back.

Epilogue

In general I like to throw dinner parties, I just don’t have much opportunity to in my small apartment.  Most of the gatherings I have are informal, grab some food off the breakfast bar and sit around the living room watching movies on TV kind of affairs.  But for Thanksgiving, Christmas, pretty much all the big holidays, I liked to go all out, scooting the couch out of the way to set a folding card table next to my tiny dining table to make room for my guests.  I’d invited Matty and Daphne as usual, but I’d also invited Sam and Parker which I was betting would make for interesting conversation.

Since I love to cook, I made everything from scratch, the whole shebang from mashed potatoes to the stuffing, two kinds of pie and a ginormous turkey made with Dijon mustard, fresh herbs and cut lemons (I’ll share the recipe with you if you want, it makes the best gravy in the world).  Even though we weren’t going to eat until about three, the whole day was pretty much wrapped up in cooking and making the house presentable.  It was better that way, keeping busy helped me not to dwell on what I had planned for after the meal.

In the back of my mind, I wondered if I should try and track down a phone number for Ben’s parents, who would probably be showing up at his house about then, but what would I tell them?  Ben was carted off to a demon prison to keep the spirit of a dangerous fallen angel trapped inside him until he dies?  Still, I felt bad for not reaching out to them, as far as they knew I was still his girlfriend.  Or had he told them we’d broken up?  In the end I decided to leave that can of worms alone.  I had other things to worry about.

While the police hadn’t come up to my apartment to investigate the shots fired, they did stop by after Ben didn’t show up for work a few days in a row.  I’d had the presence of mind to move his car back to his place the next night.  If anyone saw me dropping the car off, well there wasn’t much I could do about that.  But so far no one had asked me about that, they’d asked the standard questions like, when was the last time I’d seen him, things like that.

Since plenty of people saw him giving me a ride home that night, I stuck as close to the truth as possible, only I told them we’d broken up, and I hadn’t seen him since, which was technically not a lie.  I just left out the part by where I knew exactly where he was and why he’d disappeared.

I hadn’t told anyone about what had happened that night with Ben and Adam, I’m not really sure why.  At first I was in a bit of a daze, going through the motions of living.  And then I was so busy trying to work out how to get around the deals Adam made with Raum, I didn’t talk much at all.  Looking back, I think I probably should have called a little pow-wow with my friends sooner instead of blindsiding them with it on a full belly of holiday food, but at the time it seemed like a good plan.

After all, I needed them calm, relaxed and ready to help, and turkey has that relaxing thing in it, what’s it called… trypto-something.  I don’t know, like I said, it made sense to me at the time.

After dinner, when the tables had been put away again and we all sat around with pie and coffee, I committed the cardinal sin.

I turned off the TV.

Matty and Parker were the most vocal with the protests.  They’d been avidly flipping back and forth between two games that I had no idea who was even playing.  Even Sam had a baffled ‘what the heck?’ expression on his face as if he couldn’t fathom why I’d done such a thing.

“Sorry guys, I need to talk to you,” I began, sitting on the edge of the coffee table to face them.

“Oh come on, Merce, can’t you at least just mute it so we can watch the scores?”  Matty leaned forward to pick up the remote, but I snatched it out of reach.

“Nope, I need your full attention.  Now, some of you know a little about what’s going on, and some of you don’t.  But you guys are my family, and I need your help.”  I could see varying levels of acceptance from my little speech.  Matty clearly thought the game was much more interesting than whatever problem I was having.  Daphne and Sam nodded, each interested, but probably thinking they already knew everything there was to know, not terribly concerned.  Surprisingly Parker looked the most receptive, maybe he was happy about being included as part of my ‘family’.

“Go ahead then, sweetheart.  At least you bought us dinner first,” he winked.

“Alright then, I’ll start at the beginning.”  I went back to the attack in the alley outside work, even though they all knew a version of what had happened that night.  At first I had just Parker’s rapt attention, but then Matty’s as I went over things he’d been pretty clueless about.  Then Daphne was interested to hear a little more about pieces she’d missed out on along the way.  But I had them all hanging on my every word as I talked about what went down in the apartment the other night.  By the time I finished talking, my coffee had cooled enough to drain the cup in one thirsty swallow.  “So, questions, comments, emotional outbursts?  What I really need right now are ideas on how to get them back, because I’ve got nothing.”

The all stared at me as if I’d grown another head, with equally skeptical looks from Matt and Parker to Sam who squirmed under the attention.  Parker was the first one to break the silence.  “Did you slip some acid into the pie?  Because I’m thinking we somehow side-stepped into a show on the CW.”

I’d been anticipating that since he was the only one who hadn’t seen proof of my angelic abilities before.  “Nelo, can you come out here for a minute?”

“As you wish, Mistress.”  Nelo stepped out of the shadows behind the TV where he’d been watching us, waiting for his cue.  I felt a little bad trotting him out like a sideshow exhibit, but it was the quickest way I could think of to prove my point since I knew Sam would be averse to showing us his wings.

Everyone stared at the demon with various degrees of surprise, except for Sam who only looked nervous.  “Okay, just because you hired a midget in a costume…” Parker looked less than convinced at his own words though, especially when Nelo disappeared into the shadow under the breakfast bar in plain sight.

“Hey, I know it’s a lot to take in, but I need you to focus for me, okay Parker?  You too, Matty,” I added because he looked a little bewildered.

“I thought you said you lost all your magic powers?” Matty frowned.

“I might have led you to believe that, yeah,” I hedged.  “Only because I didn’t want you harping on going to Las Vegas to exploit them.”

Parker got a thoughtful look on his face at that.  “You know, that’s not a bad idea…”

“Hey, Adam and Ben trapped in demonland, remember?”  I interrupted before he worked up too much steam behind that idea.

“Ooh Demonland, that would be a badass addition to Disneyland, don’t you think?” Matty snickered and I lost it.

“Can we please focus?”  I started to regret the decision to include them all and Daphne could see my nerves were badly frayed.  She hopped off the couch to sit next to me on the coffee table, giving me a comforting pat on the shoulder.

“What can we do though?  Even if we could get past the gate guard, how can we get both of them out of there?  And then once we have them out of Midian, how do we get Azazael out of Ben without him attacking you again?”

“You’re not saying we should leave them there, are you?” I turned to her, stricken.

“No, of course not,” she shook her head, looking to Sam for support.  “What do you think?”

Sam had remained silent for the duration of my story and his silence stretched for long seconds before he replied.  “Mercy, Adam did strike a fair bargain.  He gave his word, that is not something to be broken lightly.”

“Yeah, but I didn’t make a deal, why should I be bound by the terms of it?” I pointed out.  Were none of them willing to help me?

“I’m in,” Matty said suddenly, whatever thought process he was going through coming unstuck.  “Whatever it takes, I’m in.  I’ve got your back, Merce,” he grinned and Daphne spoke up next.

“I’d make a great distraction, don’t you think?  I could probably get that Nobby guy to pay attention to me long enough to slip past him.”

“Thanks, you guys,” I breathed in relief, teeth catching my lower lip in worry as I turned to Sam.

“I will help you,” he said decisively.  “Adam is my brother and you are my sister.  I will get your back as well.”

That just left Parker.  I honestly wasn’t sure which side of the fence my boss would land on.  It was a lot for him to process in a short amount of time, and he had the least involvement in any of it of anyone in the room.  He leaned back on the couch, stretching out comfortably.  “Give me a half hour, we’ll figure something out.  I’m gonna need thinking food though.  What do you guys think, pizza?”

“Hell yeah, pizza gets my vote,” Matty bumped knuckles with him.

“You guys are hungry again?”  Daphne shook her head when Sam nodded.

“I could eat.”

I watched them arguing back and forth over what kind of pizza to get, blinking away the rush of emotion that brought tears to my eyes.  I wasn’t alone.  And we would get them back.  The only problem was, how?

A sharp knock at the balcony door made me jump, and Sam instantly rose to his feet, inserting himself between us and the door.  Seeing as how we were three stories up, that put a limit on the options for who it could be.  “Go ahead, see who it is,” I nodded at him in encouragement.  Sam pulled the slider open, shoulders stiffening when he saw who it was.  “Who is it?” I still couldn’t see past him to the figure obscured by my drapes.

Sam stepped back with a frown, revealing the tall form of Raziel, impeccably dressed in a charcoal gray suit with a black turtleneck.  His eyes sought mine out and he bowed his head respectfully.  “I apologize for the interruption, dear lady.”  Giving the others a brief nod of acknowledgement, he stepped into the room, kneeling before me.  “We have to talk…”

Feedback is Love,

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Read on for a special preview of Lisa Olsen’s novel, The Touch, available now!

Books by Lisa Olsen:

Pretty Witches All in a Row

The Touch

The Fallen Series

Angel of Mercy

Mercy for the Wicked

Mercy for the Damned

Forged Bloodlines Series

Wake Me When the Sun Goes Down

Meet Me When the Sun Goes Down (Fall 2012)

For more information, visit the author’s website at http://www.lisaolsen.net

Preview - The Touch

Chapter One

Despite popular belief, Lexi wasn’t a psychic.  She couldn’t tell the future or produce the winning lotto numbers (or she wouldn’t be driving a beat up VW bug a year older than she was).  Nor was she a medium who talked to the dead or saw ghosts.  Her talents were a little ambiguous for most people to understand; what they did recognize was that Lexi Morgan was a little unusual.  She preferred quirky to bat-shit crazy, but people weren’t always that kind.

Peculiar, weird, strange, none of these were new to her ears.  Even for such a laid back place like Santa Cruz California, Lexi was considered odd in most social circles.  Eccentric was her favorite one; it made it seem like it was a deliberate choice to be the way she was instead of being born to a set of circumstances completely out of her control.   Distracted, crazy, spooky even; those usually came from spending more than a few minutes in her company, but usually only after she opened her mouth.  Even after years of practice, it was hard to keep track of what she saw and what people revealed voluntarily.  While it sounded easy enough to promise herself to keep a muzzle on her outbursts, time and again things she had no right to know just slipped out in normal conversation.

That very same quality kept people calling Lexi when things hit the fan, though.  When something went missing, did you call the president of the PTA?  Nope, you called the weird girl with a knack for finding things.   So when the call came from her sister Allison, it didn’t take much in the way of deductive reasoning to figure out that she wanted something.

The nice thing to do would have been to call her back and find out what she wanted right away.  Hell, the nice thing to do would have been to answer the call in the first place, but Lexi had just mixed the perfect shade of blue for a piece she was working on in her home studio (a fancy name for the converted garage, but it suited her purposes nicely) when the call came in and she wasn’t in the mood for whatever gossip Allie wanted to talk about, even on speakerphone.

But at the third text with “911 need u 2 come ovr fst”, Lexi broke down and sent “b there soon” before setting her brushes to soak, muttering to herself the whole time washing up.  People had been begging her to help them find things all the way back to elementary school when it was actually considered cool to be special, as her Gran called it.  Growing up she’d always been the odd duck, unlike Allison, the very epitome of the perfect older sister.  Despite their differences and Lexi’s sometimes embarrassing peculiarities, the sisters were reasonably close growing up; especially after their mother’s sudden departure and their move to Gran’s place.

Her relationship with Allie cooled somewhat since her older sister’s marriage to Neil Travers, even though they still lived in the same town.  Neil, (‘the tool’, as Lexi called him behind his back) was never easy to get along with.  Lexi made an effort to keep her opinions to herself though, or she’d never get to see her niece Chloe.

It was worry for Chloe that lent a touch of urgency to Lexi’s response, pushing the little yellow car though the busy streets until she reached Branciforte Drive.  There the traffic thinned out; trees casting the winding road into perpetual shadow no matter the time of day.  The sun struggled to filter through the canopy of trees on the property, lending the house a darker cast than the faded white paint would normally allow, giving it a slightly foreboding appearance.  Or was that just her mood?  She never felt comfortable in the big house; Lexi attributed that to not getting along with Neil.  But now her imagination supplied an eerie pall to the house, as though the peeling paint was somehow something more sinister than neglect.

An unfamiliar dark blue Lincoln Towncar sat in the long circular driveway, drawing a pucker of worry to her brow as she noticed the government plates.  Whoever it belonged to, they were more than likely there in an official capacity since Neil worked for a software company and Allie hadn’t worked since Chloe was born.  A stab of guilt clenched her stomach into a hard little ball as Lexi hopped out of the car, each step that brought her closer to the front door filling her with a sense of dread.  Had something happened to Chloe and she’d been too selfish to stop her painting to come when Allison first called?

With a quick knock of warning, Lexi let herself in to the old house, immediately uncomfortable as she stepped across the threshold, as though she was in enemy territory.  “Allie?” she called out, hoping like hell Neil wasn’t home.

“In here Lexi,” came the response from the front living room where her sister sat with a man who wasn’t her husband at all.  The stranger held a mug of coffee in his hand, his attention focused on Lexi from the moment she appeared in the archway, dark eyes scrutinizing her from head to toe and back again.

Lexi knew exactly what people thought of her on first sight.  Not that her appearance stood out all that much in a city like Santa Cruz, where people came from all over the world to share in its unique atmosphere.  A liberal town, it wasn’t unusual to see people running around barefoot, dressed in hippy chic or the latest in clothing made from hemp.  The Hare Krishna population could walk the main thoroughfares, tambourines and all, without even raising a brow.  Her personal style was hardly outlandish by these standards; Lexi preferred to dress for comfort in soft, breathable fabrics.  She didn’t own a pair of skinny jeans or high heels.  Her long hair had been through just about every hue imaginable to man over the years.  Currently a respectable medium brown (her natural color) save a few blue streaks (not so much on the respectable side), Lexi preferred to leave it loose to spill over her shoulders, or pulled back into a simple pony tail when she was working, as it was now.  There were plenty of artist types in town who liked to get creative with their own style.  Enough so that her gloved hands often went without comment, even on the hottest summer days, but the man’s gaze lingered there before returning to her face and Lexi could practically see the wheels turning in his head.

“Lexi, thank God you’re here, the police won’t do anything at all,” Allie’s face pinched with worry.  While she looked polished as usual in khaki slacks and a pale pink sweater set, as though she’d stepped out of the pages of a Macy’s catalogue, no amount of makeup could hide the dark circles visible under her eyes.

“Now that’s not what I said, Allie…” the man set down the mug of coffee, returning his attention to Allison.

Surprised by the familiarity between them, Lexi tried to decide what was more unsettling; the fact that the cop knew her sister well enough to call her Allie or the fact that the police were there at all.  “What’s going on?  Did something happen to Chloe?”

“No, she’s at gymnastics.  I thought it would be better to report this when she’s not here.  It’s Neil; he never came home last night.”

Lexi barely caught herself in time before she blurted out oh, is that all, mashing her lips together before recovering.  “Well, how long has he been gone?  When’s the last time you saw him?”

“Do you mind if I finish my questions first?” the policeman interrupted with a pained look that made her suppress a smile.

“Sorry, go right ahead Detective…”

“Ryan.  Thank you,” he replied and the name clicked in Lexi’s memory.  Gabriel Ryan.  Allison dated him back in high school for about a month.  What an odd coincidence that he happened to be the one to respond to the call about Neil’s disappearance.  If that’s what it was.  Frankly, Lexi didn’t think her sister would get off that lucky.  The guy was probably just sleeping it off somewhere after a boys night out.  Her interruption seemed to throw the detective off of his game and he flipped back through his notebook with a purse of the lips before continuing his questions.

“So let’s see, where were we?  Oh right, did you notice if any of his clothes are missing?”

Allison paused to consider the question for a long moment, “I don’t think so, but I should probably check a little closer,” she started to rise from the couch.

“Hold on, you can do that in just a little bit, let’s finish with the first round of questions, shall we?” Ryan offered her a genial smile.  “Do the two of you have a joint bank account?”

“Yes, of course,” Allie nodded.

“Have you checked to see if any of the money is missing?”

“No, do you think I should?”

“It’s probably a good indicator as to whether he left on his own,” Ryan said carefully.

“If he did take their money, is there anything you can do to get it back?” Lexi asked, not putting it past Neil to take off with their savings if the situation warranted it.

“Neil would never do anything like that,” Allison interrupted, her eyes narrowing with annoyance.

“No, of course not,” Lexi muttered, sinking into a chair.  This looked like it was going to turn into a much longer visit than she first intended and now she regretted not stopping for a snack before heading over.

Ryan watched the sisters with interest before returning to his line of questioning.  “What kind of car does he drive?”

“It’s an Audi A6 that he leases, it’s ah… black and I think it’s just a few months old.”

“Do you have the license number?”

A pucker appeared on her forehead as Allison thought it over.  “I think it starts with 2LAN… but I don’t remember what comes after that to be honest.”

“That’s okay Allie, most people don’t remember their spouse’s license plate number by heart,” Gabriel reassured her gently.  “But the car is definitely missing too?”

“I talked to his friend Larry at work; he said the lot was empty this morning when he got there.  You don’t think that he…?” Allison left off the rest of the sentence, unable to bring herself to form the words.

Lexi immediately saw the path her sister’s mind was starting to wander and cut her off.  “Don’t worry sweetie, if he wrapped his car around a tree the hospital would have called you by now.”  The detective gave her a look for that, but Lexi wasn’t sure how to interpret it, so she just ignored it.

“I think I have enough to get started here, Allie.  Why don’t you go up and look through his things and check on that bank information while I talk to your sister, okay?”

“Just look through his things,” Lexi gave her a pointed stare, not wanting to spell it out in front of the cop and Allie seemed to catch her meaning, giving her a short nod.  When Lexi turned back around, Gabriel was watching her intently and she gave him a self-conscious smile, tucking an errant blue lock of hair behind her ear.

Flipping open his notebook to a new page, Detective Ryan set pen to paper.  “It’s Lexi Morgan, right?  Is that short for something?”

“Alexandra,” she replied, watching him write.  He’d been a big deal back in the day; Captain of the swim team and the track team.  The years had been kind to the former jock, his build still slim and muscular under the sports coat and his jeans were tight enough that she could see he was still in pretty good shape.  Straight brown hair threatened to spill over his forehead, nearly touching his eyebrow as he looked down, giving him a slightly tousled look, as though he’d gotten ready in a hurry, but as soon as he looked up again the hair fell back into its regularly schooled style.  Lexi couldn’t tell if the stubble around his chin and upper lip was just from forgetting to shave for a couple of days or if it was meant to be a short mustache and goatee.  Either way she had to admire the overall effect; on him it looked good.

“Your date of birth please?”

“You don’t remember me, do you?” Lexi countered, head canting to one side as she studied him.  It made perfect sense that he wouldn’t; he hadn’t spoken more than five words to her back in high school.  In addition to being four or five years younger than him, they hadn’t exactly run with the same crowd.

Gabriel’s head came up in surprise, “Ah… no, I can’t say that I do, sorry,” he gave her a rueful grin.

There was that smile again, coupled with the slightly baffled expression on his face, he was adorable.  Much cuter than the bozo Allie ended up marrying.  “That’s okay.  To be fair you only dated my sister for what, five minutes?” she grinned back.  Her sister was an idiot…

“It was longer than five minutes…” he started to protest.

“Yeah, but I get it, I was the pesky younger sister, easily forgotten.  It’s no biggie,” she fanned her gloved hand through the air.  “I’ve completely forgiven you.”

“Thanks, I think,” he chuckled softly.  “So, Miss Morgan, when was the last time you saw your brother in law?”

“It’s Lexi,” she corrected him automatically, chewing on her bottom lip as she thought it over.  “I wanna say Easter, but I can’t remember if he was here, I spent most of my time with Chloe outside.  He might have been in the house watching sports or something.  You knew him, right?”  Neil had been part of that jock circle of meatheads at Harbor High; he had to have known him.

“Yeah, I did, but we lost touch in college.”  Ryan seemed to realize that he’d answered a personal question, and attempted to reroute the conversation.  “How would you categorize your relationship with him?”

“Wow, that’s a loaded question,” Lexi snorted, propping her worn boots up on the edge of the coffee table and wrapping her arms around her knees.  “I’m sure Allie told you, Neil and I don’t exactly get along.”  She left off the part where he was a jerk and she couldn’t stand the sight of him, best to stick to the questions asked without embellishing.

“Why not?”

“’Cause he’s an asshat.”

Ryan’s pen froze above the paper, the bangs hanging in his eyes again as he looked up in surprise.  “I’m sorry, he’s what?”

“Ass-hat, just like it sounds,” Lexi supplied cheerily, he’d asked after all.  “I told you, we didn’t get along,” she smiled sweetly.

His lips quirked like he was suppressing the urge to smile and Gabriel let out a long breath before regaining his train of thought.  “Was there a particular incident that caused this rift between you, or is it a general dislike?”

“I’d have to go with the second one.  Unless you count the first time I met him as a particular incident.  He’s just…” she made a face, “Allie could have done so much better.  Like you, she should have stuck with you and then I would be able to see my niece whenever I want.”

This time he did smile.  “Neil doesn’t let you see her whenever you want?”

“He thinks I’m a bad influence.”

“Are you?”

“I guess that depends on your definition of a bad influence,” Lexi grinned wickedly.  “You know, this conversation isn’t turning out so well.  If you end up finding him in a ditch with his brains bashed, in you’re gonna think I bumped him off,” she added, only partly teasing.

“Is that what you think happened to him?”

“Nah, there’s no way I’m that lucky,” she quipped.  “Seriously though, he’s only been gone since yesterday?  He’s probably holed up somewhere sleeping it off.”

“Alone?”

“Interesting question,” Lexi regarded him with a new respect; he was looking at it from all angles.  There were things that she knew about Neil, things she’d never told Allie because it would crush her, but there wasn’t anything she could tell him that was based in cold hard facts other than what her gift told her.  “I’ll just say it’s entirely possible that he’s not alone, and leave it at that.”

“So their marriage isn’t quite as rosy as she would have me believe?”

“You’d think Allie was the artist in the family from the pictures she likes to paint, wouldn’t you?” Lexi gave a tight smile.  “It’s not that she’s delusional or even clueless.  I think on some level she knows her marriage isn’t all its cracked up to be; but it’s easier for her to think of it as perfect, if that makes sense.”

Gabriel nodded slowly, but she didn’t think he really understood from the look on his face.  It was hard enough for Lexi to swallow but she’d had a lot more practice accepting Allie’s perspective.

“And they’ve been married for how long?”

“Let’s see, Chloe’s ten, so going on eleven years now.  Why, are you thinking you might have a shot with Allison now that Neil’s out of the picture?”  Again, she was only half kidding, Lexi fully expected Neil to come back when he was good and ready but the thought crossed her mind; was the detective single and looking?  There was no ring on his hand, but that didn’t mean much these days.

“That wouldn’t be my first instinct, no,” Gabriel muttered.

“Why did you guys break up, if you don’t mind me asking?”

“Actually, I do mind,” he replied with a slightly bewildered smile.  “Miss Morgan, I’m doing my best to take a missing person’s report and I think you’ve asked almost as many questions as I have.  Did you want to take over?”  Gabriel thrust the notebook in her direction.

“No, you’re doing a bang up job so far.”  Lexi kept her hands neatly folded in her lap, though she was a little curious as to what he’d scribbled down in that little book about her family.  “I noticed you called it a report though and not an investigation.  Do we have to wait forty-eight hours or something until it’s considered an investigation?”  She could see in his face that he wasn’t used to getting such direct questions in his line of work, but she couldn’t help it.  “I’m sorry, I know this is old hat to you but this is my first missing person.  Even if it is a tool like Neil, Allie wants him back, so…”

This time his smile was a little easier and he tucked away the notebook with a sigh.  “No, you can report someone missing at any time; it doesn’t have to be forty-eight hours from the time he’s missed.  The thing is, it’s not a crime for a guy to stay away for a while or even decide not to come home ever again.  Without any signs of foul play, there’s not a whole lot I can do.  Normally a call like this would get a uniform out here to ask a few questions, we’d file a report and that’s pretty much the end of it, there’s not even a follow up with a detective.  The only reason I responded was because I recognized Neil’s name when the call came through and I was in the area, so I thought I’d check it out.  I didn’t even remember that Allie married him,” he spread his hands.  “I tried explaining that to your sister but…”

“Yeah, that doesn’t sound like news she wanted to hear.”  Lexi chewed on her bottom lip, eyes shifting when Allison returned to the living room.

“I don’t think any of his clothes are missing, I was careful going through everything though, just in case,” Allie addressed Lexi directly before turning to the detective.  “I don’t know how to check about the bank account though; I can’t remember the online password.”

“Oh Allie…” Lexi groaned, how could anyone be so clueless?

“What?  Neil handles all of the finances; I can’t remember the last time I had to get into any of that stuff.”

“If you call the bank they should be able to assist you with that,” Gabriel supplied helpfully.

“But I don’t know the account numbers…”

Lexi resisted the urge to facepalm, forcing a neutral smile to her face.  “We’ll figure it out Allie, I’ll help you, okay?”  There had to be a paper trail around the house somewhere to dig into that stuff, and if not, calling the bank should do the trick like Detective Ryan recommended.

Allison gave her a grateful smile, “Thanks Lexi, you’re so good at those kinds of things.”

Lexi bit back the sarcastic retort that leapt to her lips, leaving the bland smile there while the detective got to his feet.  Now that he stood she could see just how tall he was, easily over six feet which meant he would tower over her five foot four frame but he was well matched to Allie’s five seven height.  Once again she wondered what things would have been like if her sister had married someone she could get along with reasonably well.  But then again, it was probably for the best that her brother in law wasn’t someone she could drool over…

Detective Ryan was all business now that Allison rejoined them, no sign of that laid back quality in the set of his impressive shoulders.  “I’ll tell you what I’ll do.  I’ve got the list of Neil’s friends and associates; I’ll make a few calls and see if I can come up with anything, okay?”

“And you’ll call me?  Either way, whether you find anything or not?” Allie pressed.

“I will,” he nodded, edging towards the door and Lexi took pity on him.

“Okay, thanks; we’ve got it from here.  I’ll see the detective out and I’ll be right back Allie,” she smiled, scooting past him to the front door before she spoke again.  “Thanks again for the help, Detective.  It’s really nice of you to offer to call around, but I can do that too if you’re busy.”

“It’s no trouble, a few calls won’t take up much of my day,” he shrugged it off.  “I have to say I’m a little surprised to see you pitching in so eagerly to track him down though,” Ryan paused on the front porch.

“Yeah well, she’s my sister.  Sure he’s an asshat, but he’s her asshat,” she gave him a lopsided grin.  “Besides, if he skipped out on her I wanna know before he cleans out the bank account.”

Gabriel’s smile was back as she followed him out onto the porch.  Turning to lean a little closer to her, he dropped his voice to a conspiratorial whisper.  “You know, off the record, I always thought Neil was kind of a tool too, but I think I like asshat better.  Let’s hope for your sister’s sake he comes back in one piece though.”

Lexi stared after him for a moment, at a loss for words.  “Are you sure about that?  That would leave Allie off the market,” she called after him.

“She’s not my type,” he replied with a wink so fast she thought she might have imagined it.  The question remained, just who was his type?